Second Place is just another not good enough
when you can barely pull yourself together enough
to be the best you’re expected to be
which isn’t even the best you can be.
So it feels like you failed and
you keep on failing
because
you are scared.
Scared of that failure
that is running up behind you
closer every time, reminding you of what you’re not.
Scared of letting yourself down—a cruel twist of fate
because in that fear, you are allowing yourself to make it a reality.
You are a failure.
That’s what you think
because someone keeps telling you that.
Everything they say to you tears at your soul. They think
you are something you’re not and they won’t rest until
you believe it too.
But the others think you are perfect.
At first, it is nice being perfect.
But slowly you realize that being perfect is a perfect setup
for failure.
Because no one is perfect.
No one is immune to failure.
And the sad thing is, you know this, but you can’t stop
dragging your shattered perfect soul around
trying desperately not to let the looming failure
overtake you
and leave you crying alone in the settling dust.