Author's Note (from 2021): Looking back on when I wrote this book in 2017, I recognize that this chapter may be a bit cringy with the dialogue. That being said, I think I wrote this in a time where I just wanted someone to be with me and care for me the way Lexi does with not just Derek, but everyone around her which sort of translated into this cringy chapter. So, I recognize that it may make you cringe (I do when I read it), but I also just wanted to say that I'm glad the time in my life where I felt like this was the ideal is over and I'm in a much better place while being more comfortable with the people around me.
Quick note: things get a little steamy in this chapter. It is much more steamy than I am usually comfortable with, but I felt the need to expand. Plus, my friend who reads this series and kills me every time something bad happens to Dexi has been begging for actual smut (seriously, I suggested that at one point, Lexi would have some meaningless sex with some random guy and she glared at me for the rest of the day). Don't worry, it's not smut--I'm not experienced enough for that. But it gets steamy. Hope you enjoy!
(MY GIF- Imagine Leon is Derek)
Walking up to the apartment door, Derek's scent washes over Lexi. The emotionally traumatizing day had drained her, but she needs to talk to him. To see him. To make sure he is really there.
When she opens the door to the moonlit apartment, she sees Derek at the island, a glass of bourbon in front of him. It had not been touched. He glances up and instantly gets to his feet. "Hey," he says, trying to sound casual.
"Hey," She replies, closing the door behind her and walking up to him. "Drinking?"
"Been a long day."
She stares up at him, her blue eyes unblinking. He doesn't look away. "Where is Cora?"
Derek clears his throat, glancing at the ground. He moves away from Lexi, his feet carrying him towards the couch. "I updated her. She wanted to stay with Davina. They're friends now, I guess."
"I knew they would get along."
When Derek turns back, he finds Lexi right next to him. She runs her hand down his arm, the silence of the night deafening. The air in the room grows tense as Lexi's eyes flicker to Derek's lips. "Something's wrong," she states. "What's wrong?"
Derek debates lying to her. Nothing can get past her, though. She knows everything about him. And he knows everything about her. "He shot you," Derek says, his jaw tight. The words feel like acid in his mouth. "And you fell. Into my arms. And I thought I would lose you."
Lexi stretches her arms around Derek's neck, her breath caught in her throat. She smoothes the hair on the back of his head as he hugs her back. He nuzzles his nose in the crook of her neck, inhaling deeply.
Lexi opens her mouth, but the words get caught in her throat. I'm here.
"Lex, I thought I was gonna lose you," Derek admits, pulling away just so he can lean his forehead against hers. "There was so much blood. I saw the red and black... I wanted to rip Lucien apart right then and there. But you were falling. It seemed like an eternity before I got to you. And you were trying to get air, but you couldn't, and all I could think was, 'Not again. Please not again.'"
Lexi opens her eyes to stare at Derek's closed ones. She is sure that he is keeping them closed to avoid the tears welling up in them. "Derek..." She shakes her head.
"It was Paige all over again," Derek keeps his voice carefully even, only cracking when he says her name. "You were in my arms, blood everywhere, in so much pain that you could barely speak..."
"I love you, Derek. With all my heart," she whispers.
"I thought I was going to lose you."
"I love you, Derek. With all my heart," She repeats, pressing a kiss to his right cheek.
"You would have died..."
"I love you, Derek. With all my heart." A kiss on his left cheek.
"If we had been a minute later..."
"I love you, Derek. With all my heart." A kiss to his left eyelid.
"And then there was Matt..."
"I love you, Derek. With all my heart." Another kiss on his right eyelid.
"He didn't even care if you died. I almost tore him apart." His voice begins to crack more and more.
"I love you, Derek. With all my heart." Kiss to his forehead.
"When Cora came in, blood everywhere, and told me she didn't know where you were..."
"I love you, Derek. With all my heart." A kiss on the tip of his nose.
"I was ready to destroy this goddamn city to find you."
"I love you, Derek. With all my heart." Forehead kiss.
"You and Cora are all that matter to me."
"I love you, Derek. With all my heart." A kiss on his jaw.
"There was a moment where I thought, 'What if I never see her again?'"
"I love you, Derek. With all my heart." A kiss on the edge of his lips.
"I kept playing our last conversation over and over in my head."
"I love you, Derek. With all my heart." A kiss on the lips.
"I tried to find where it went wrong—"
"I love you, Derek. With all my heart." Another kiss on the lips.
"How it could have been avoided—"
"I love you, Derek. With all my heart." Another kiss on the lips.
"How I could have stopped you—"
"I love you, Derek. With all my heart." Another to the lips.
"Or protected you—"
"I love you, Derek. With all my heart."
This final kiss on the lips, Derek returns with full force. His hand cups the back of her head as his mouth melds with hers. Her hair is soft and easily flows through his fingers. Her scent is all he can smells: cherries and vanilla. His favorite scents. She smells of wind and wildness, unchecked anger and years of guilt. She smells of home. His home.
Lexi presses her body against Derek's, letting a moan slip past her lips as she lets Derek take control. His tongue explores every inch of her mouth as she tugs at his shirt.
He pulls back for a moment, ready to take it off, but Lexi completes the task for him. She rips his shirt in two, her hands trailing up his toned stomach and chest.
Derek returns the favor, throwing Lexi's jacket into some corner of the room and tearing her shirt off, the buttons popping off. Her black lace bra seems to shine off of her pale skin.
They both pant, taking a moment to glance over each other. They need to see that the other is safe. Is secure. Is not hurt or bleeding or dying or worse. They need to see each other.
The next moment, their lips are attached once more, tongues now fighting for control. Derek's hands slip over the curve of Lexi's back, making her shiver. He hooks his fingers into her jeans, giving a tug.
She lets him undo her jeans, lets him push them off, as she works on his own pants. The entire time, they are kissing each other, needing the taste of each other to remind them that they are here. They are alive. They are together.
The moment both of their pants are off, Derek's hands move a bit lower than Lexi's back. Lexi gasps as Derek squeezes. She jumps up, wrapping her legs around Derek's torso. His hands hold her up from her ass. He gives another appreciative squeeze.
Lexi lets a laugh slip past her lips as Derek quickly carries her to the bedroom. The sultry laugh prompts Derek to be more aggressive. He wants to hear it again. He wants to see her smile and be happy. He gently lays her on the bed, his body hovering above hers. They are so close, Lexi can feel the heat radiating off of Derek. That, among other things.
Derek starts to trail his kisses away from Lexi's mouth. She lets out small whimpers and moans as he sucks on her neck. When he makes it to her shoulder, he pauses, his breath heating up her skin.
His fingers dance over the healed skin. "Three bullet wounds were here this morning," he rasps, his voice rough and thick with emotion.
"And they are all healed," Lexi responds, her voice equally raspy and low.
Derek lowers his lips to the skin, gently placing kisses around the area. He starts near her shoulder and moves down until he can feel her heart beating in her chest through his lips. He peppers kisses all over her chest before moving lower.
And lower.
And lower.
This was so fun to write. I was blushing the whole time. I really hope you liked this because this was my first time writing something this steamy. Feedback? Was it ok?
Hope you enjoyed!