ELIZABETH
Sunday, August 27th 2017
His car smells like a mixture of cigarettes, and maybe...marijuana? I can't quite put my finger on it, but it certainly isn't a bad smell. It's oddly comforting. "Are you cold—or do you want the air on?" He asks, nervously fumbling with the controls on the bottom of his dashboard.
"I'm fine." I say, feeling equally, if not more nervous. "Thanks though."
"Yeah, m'gonna keep it off." A slightly awkward silence settles over us. "So, is dinner okay?"
"Of course." His ringed, inked fingers drum against the steering wheel. "Where are we going?"
"I wasn't sure about any of the restaurants here, like, what's good or whatever? So, I made a reservation at this little joint in Worthing...if that's cool?" I begin to nod, "I know it's a bit far, but it's really good. Do you like Italian?"
"Oh, okay...but yes, I love Italian."
"Cool..." Another silence. I take my phone out and quickly text Harry.
SOS...how do I stop awkward silences?!
He doesn't respond immediately, so I shove it back in my purse. "I've never done this before..."
"What?" I ask.
"This...like, a date." He swipes his tongue across his lips. "So, yeah...dunno, I'm not sure what to say."
"Oh, well...neither have I. Last time was in high school and it was pretty uncomfortable. He didn't talk to me the whole time."
"I feel like...I want to talk to you but m'not sure what to say...and because of that, like, I feel so dumb—m'sorry, Elizabeth."
"Pull over." He looks at me, obviously confused and probably hurt.
"Can I just...no, I'll take you home." I laugh and shake my head.
"Zayn, just pull over." He does so and puts his emergency flashers on. "Come on." I step out of the car and he follows me. We both walk to the front, meeting in the middle, and I hold my hand out to him. "Hi." His smile grows and he pulls me a little bit closer.
"Hi."
"We're gonna start over."
"Yeah?"
"Yes, none of this first date pressure. Let's just...have fun."
"I'd love that." His fingers interlace with mine. "I've got an idea...do you trust me?"
"I do."
"Okay, come on." As we climb back into his rusted Camaro and drive away, his hand makes it's way back over to mine and our fingers comfortably coil around each other. The sky is dark, so I can't see the ocean as we drive alongside it, but I know it's there. Twenty or so minutes later, the lights from the upcoming pier illuminate the night. I don't say anything, but I hope that we're going there. Luckily, Zayn snags a front parking space, but before I can follow him in climbing out of the car, he tells me to stay put. I do, only to watch him run around to my side. He opens up the door and helps me to stand up. "S'this alright?"
"Only if we're going to the arcade." He walks backwards, with both of my hands in his.
"Come on, you." I jog to catch up to him and when I do, I hang onto his arm. For some reason, the nerves that I felt less than half an hour ago had completely disappeared and I felt nothing but excitement for the night ahead of us. The smell of fried food, mixed with the salty ocean air invaded my senses and the colorful carnival-style lights had me practically mesmerized. Mum and I had come here a couple of times and every time, Anne and Harry joined us. But it had been years since I'd been back. "God, every bit of money that I got as a kid, it all went to this place." Zayn says, smiling as he thinks back to his childhood.
"And I'm sure it was all worth it?"
"Every penny." He chuckles, "Granted, had I, like, saved that money, I might be somewhere else right now..."
"Somewhere that's not here?" We walk into the warmth of the arcade.
"I slacked off quite a bit after high school...I didn't, like, go to university or anything...I thought I could make a living by singing..."
"Why can't you?"
"I mean, I suppose I could...but I've got to, like, be more rational, ya know?"
"Rational's overrated." He grins down at me.
"You think?"
"I know." He inserts money into the machine and a large pile of game-coins come tumbling into the tray.
"Did you go to school?" I shake my head as we divvy them up.
"School's not for me."
"And why is that?"
"I just...don't see the point. I don't want to do anything with my life that requires schooling...so, I'm not going to waste money and time trying to prove something, you know?"
"I totally agree, yeah."
"My best friend goes to school in London and he loves it...but he's always been good at being responsible and ambitious...he's constantly telling me that I need to go out of my comfort zone and do the best that I can do...but, I feel like I enjoy what I do—I enjoy my life right now, so why would I trade that for anything else?"
"Do what makes you happy. That's, like, the most important thing, I think." We walk towards the Skee-Ball lanes. "What do you wanna do?" I chuckle, nervously.
"I'll let you know when I figure it out." He smiles softly down at me, his caramel eyes pooling with warmth.
"I'll be here." The music and the sounds of the games are drowned out as we gaze at one another. "M'good at waiting."
"Good to know." He bends down and feeds the game a couple of tokens, then he hands me the heavy ball.
"Ladies first." My first attempt is a shit one, it goes straight into the measly ten-point hole.
"Balls." I say.
"Pun intended?" He asks, his tongue between his teeth.
"Of course." He takes his turn, and it goes straight into the fifty-pointer.
"Can I make it weird for a minute?"
"Sure." I answer, uncertain and slightly concerned about what weird might entail.
"Your best friend..." Ah, yes. Well, better now than later.
"Yeah..."
"What's the deal with that?"
"Um, nothing really. His mum is the one who was with mine the other night at the pub...they grew up together and they're best friends, so when we moved here, Harry was my only friend. Since I was six, he's been one of the only constants in my life. And we're just friends...it's never been anything more."
"Okay cool. Like, I just had to ask, ya know?"
"No, no, I totally get it. And I know it sounds a bit strange...but he's nothing to worry about, I promise."
"Good. I mean, it's no secret that I like you...so, yeah. M'happy to hear that." The lights give off a red hue against our faces, so I'm hoping he can't see my blush.
"I like you too." My response is an honest one.
"S'that so?" He's so handsome, it hurts.
"Mhm..." He takes a step towards me and I inhale sharply. But instead of doing what I expected him to do, he hands me another ball.
"Your turn, love." We play three more rounds of Skee-Ball before moving onto another game, and towards the end of the night, we stop to use our remaining tokens on the stuffed animal machine. I fail the first three times, so when Zayn uses our final coin, I cheer him on, instructing him to go for the adorable pink and white octopus. At the last second, he clamps the claw and pulls up the cute little stuffed sea creature. It falls into the prize bin and he bends down to pick it up. "For you..." He says, handing it to me. This is truly the most romantic thing anyone has ever done for me. As I take it from him, I reach up and wrap my arms around his neck. He seems slightly taken aback by my gesture but his hands quickly encircle my waist and he buries his face in my neck. We both, reluctantly pull apart and my blush is so hot against my cheeks. "Should we grab some food?" He asks, his face close to mine. I nod and he takes my hand, pulling me out of the arcade. We order two pretzels and some sodas, then we sit on the benches overlooking the black, vast channel. "Is it weird that I wanna go on the carousel?" Despite my giggle, I shake my head.
"Of course not...I want to go on too."
"Yeah?" His smile is so bright and his teeth are so perfect and his eyes glisten beneath the lights that surround us.
"Yes. I love the carousel." He shoves the last bite of his pretzel into his mouth and stands up. I'm no longer hungry, so I throw mine out and take his hand once more.
We grab two horses and climb on, and when the ride starts and the music begins playing, I can't help but grin like the little girl who came here with her mum and her best friend so many years ago. How did these places make someone feel so young again? I look over at Zayn and he's watching me with the same smile on his face. Seconds later, he's standing up off his horse and he leans against mine. His fingers gently caress my cheek and then he's pulling my face closer. This is what I've been waiting for since I met him, and my nerves are silently taking over. He's not quick to kiss me, our noses brush together and our mouths hover momentarily, but finally, the gentlest of pecks is delivered to my lips. After that, I press forward and he deepens it. As he cups my face, his rings are cold against my cheeks, and my fingers curl around the collar of his leather jacket. We're both hesitant to pull away, but when we do, I feel like we both should be breathless. He bites his lip, his thumb continuing to graze my cheek.
"And I thought I liked you a lot before..." He murmurs.
"I can't tell if that's a good thing or—" He kisses me again, preventing me from finishing my sentence.
"It's a good thing...like, a really good thing." I don't let my hold on his jacket go, instead, I use it to bring him closer. I like him so much, it's strange. It feels strange.
"I think so too." I whisper, hoping he can hear me over the music. I'm almost sure he does. The carousel does one more loop around before stopping. Zayn helps me down and holds my hand as we walk away from the old ride.
"Do I have to take you home?" There's humor in his tone, but something tells me that he's not being very funny.
"I truly wish I didn't have to work the opening shift."
"What time do you have to go in?"
"Five a.m." I groan, just thinking about it.
"Jesus...I do not envy you." He chuckles. "Do people even, like, come in that early?"
"Actually, you'd be surprised...the earlier I work, the better my tips are."
"Interesting...I feel like my body doesn't really function until, like...eight. Maybe nine." Playfully, I roll my eyes.
"Musicians."
"Ha-ha." I grin and allow him to pull me closer into his side. We don't say much as we walk to his car, but as soon as we're on the road, his hand finds mine. "So, have you got any plans after work?"
"Sleep?"
"Anything else?"
"Probably not...Why? Do you have something in mind?" He smirks.
"I might..."
"What might that something be?"
"Well, if you're tired or whatever, maybe we could just, like, chill at one of our places? Watch a movie or something, maybe."
"I'd like that, yeah. Usually when I work the a.m shift, I zonk out pretty early."
"When are you off?"
"Depends on how busy we are, but probably noon...latest one o'clock."
"Oh, okay." I feel a yawn coming on, but I can't stop it. On the eve of my a.m shift, ten-thirty is way past my bedtime. "You can text me or whatever, and we can plan things around, like, whatever time you're done." I nod, but as I pull my phone out, I'm overwhelmed by texts and missed calls. Three calls, five texts all from the good ol' best mate.
Are you out with that guy?
HEY ANSWER ME.
Elizabeth? Are you alive?
Oh my god, Beth! Don't worry me!
Fine. Be that way. I'm on my way home, my lecture tomorrow was canceled. Mum said she'd do my laundry lol. Will you call me when you get home? I wanna hang out.
I laugh and shake my head. "What's so funny?"
"Oh, it's Harry...he's just bombarded me with messages, is all." I say, "He's home, actually. He came home tonight...maybe you can meet him tomorrow?"
"Um...yeah, sure. I'm alright with anything."
"How about...I go home after work, take a nap and then we can all grab drinks tomorrow night?"
"Yeah, yeah, that sounds good."
"Cool." I'm excited now, about seeing Harry and about Harry meeting Zayn. I type up a quick response and send it.
On my way home...ETA ten minutes. Still wanna come over? I'm super tired and I have the a.m shift :(
He responds a couple of seconds later.
Yes, I do still want to, even though you ignored me for five years. I'll bug you as payback .xx
Wanker. I send him a simple thumbs up, then I close my phone and look over at Zayn. His hand is still encasing mine, and his eyes are trained on the road in front of us. He must feel my gaze lingering, because he glances over at me.
"I'm...I had a really good time tonight, Liz—wait, is it alright if I call you that?" Liz is certainly one of the lesser used nicknames that I go by, but for some reason, I like the sound of it rolling off of Zayn's tongue. Mum and Anne call me El, or Ellie. Harry is pretty much the only person who calls me Beth. Everyone else calls me Elizabeth. But Liz...Liz is nice. Especially coming from Zayn.
"No one has ever really called me that, but I like it, so yes...please do."
"I like it a lot too." Another comfortable silence falls over us, and it pretty much lasts the rest of the drive. I see Harry's old, beat up Land Rover parked in the driveway, but I hope that I don't have to immediately say goodbye to Zayn. Harry and mum get on just fine, he can handle himself for a few extra minutes. We stare at one another for a second, before he leans forward. "Can we just...can I kiss you for a bit? Would that be okay?" You took the words right out of my mouth. I close the small gap between us and his fingers entangle themselves in my hair. This time is different, he slips his tongue past my lips and tickles mine. Goosebumps spread across my skin and I feel his chuckles vibrate through me. "You cold, babe?"
"Don't tease..." I smile back against his mouth.
"M'sorry...that was just very cute. You're very cute, so m'gonna keep kissing you." I hold onto his wrists and we begin to...well, I believe the kids these days are calling it a make-out? And I certainly do not hate it. Not a single bit. One of his hands stays locked around my tresses, the other slides around my waist and pulls me closer. His teeth suck on my lip and I feel like if I don't put an end to it now, I won't be able to stop myself. He's that good. Already, my lips feel swollen, so I can't imagine the look of them.
"I should go..."
"Did I go too far? Are you okay?" I laugh lightly, shake my head and peck him quickly.
"I'm fine...and you're good. I just...it's late and I feel like I'm going to pass out." This isn't a complete fib, but how do I tell him that I'm a virgin and I want to rip his clothes off right here and right now? He doesn't look entirely convinced, so I kiss him once more. "I had...such an amazing time tonight, Zayn. I couldn't have hoped for a better first date."
"First of many?" He half-asks. I nod.
"First of many." My confirmation makes his real, eye-shimmering smile return. "Thank you."
"It was my pleasure, babe. I'll talk to you tomorrow, yeah?" I open the car door and slip out.
"Yeah. Get home safe, please."
"I will. Goodnight, Liz."
"Goodnight, Zayn." I shut the door and give him one final wave before turning and jogging up to the front door. My lips are still tingling...they feel like the nasty lip-plumper that Margot forced me to wear once—the difference was, there was nothing nasty about this tingle. I wanted to never stop feeling it.