hold me like a breath × ed

By blowdolans

370 46 13

Sometimes our goodbyes , aren't real goodbyes. First book; Dear diary Second book; Hold me like breath More

o n e
t w o
t h r e e
f o u r
f i v e
s i x
s e v a n
n i n e
t e n
e l e v e n

e I g h t

39 6 4
By blowdolans

                                                                                           Emily

"Thank you Cameron for letting me stay a while. Bella said she just really missed back home. And, I really don't trust New York alone."

She laughed, "Of course Emily, remember, my homes your home."

I got up off my bed and roamed the room, we was staying in Ethan's room. They had moved all of Grayson's things in her also.

"God. I haven't been here in so long. this brings back so many memories."

She smiled, "Yeah. it does. But we better get some sleep. If you're gonna be staying here you'll need to find a job. Goodnight Emily."

I smiled, "Goodnight."

I then closed my eyes and drifted off into a deep sleep.

-

I felt someone staring at me while I was sleeping. I opened my eyes to see a little girl, one that came in with me and Ethan at the funeral.

She stood there with a big smile on her, "My daddys a big sleeper. and I don't feel good, can you rock me?"

I made a confused face. Ethan was here? This is his daughter, he must be here.

I got up out of mu bed and smiled, "Sure. Lets go downstairs."

She ran down the stairs and got on the couch. It was only 6am. everyone was all asleep. she grabbed her blanket and walked over to me.

"Daddy holds be like a baby doll."

she climbed in my arms and put her thumb in her mouth. I wrapped the blanket on her and began to rock her.

"What's your name?" she asked.

I smiled, "Emily, and you?"

"Alice", she replied smiling.

I nodded, "You should probably get some sleep now, Alice.

She smiled and dozed off to sleep.

It felt weird rocking ethans child. But she was just like him. she had beautiful green and brown eyes. A smile so perfect, she was beautiful.

I always imagined me and ethan rocking our baby. Getting up at night, feeding him, or her. It was going to be great. But some things just don't go as planned.

"Can you sing to me?", she asked snapping me out of my trance.

"Sure."

"Go to sleep, Go to sleep. Go to sleep little baby. Go to sleep, Go to sleep. "

Once I saw she had fallen asleep, I moved her hair from her face and kissed her forehead.

I heard someone running down the stairs yelling Alices name.

"Alice?! Oh my god!! Alice where are you?"

"Shhhh." , I yelled back at Ethan.

He put his hand on his heart and took a deep breath, "There you are."

He walked over to me and saw her asleep in her arms, "Did you come get her?"

I laughed, "No, she came in my room and told me you was a heavy sleeper and she wanted me to rock her to sleep."

He laughed, "Yep, that's alice."

"Why are you guys here?"

He took in a deep breath, "Last night I was talking to Rosalie, and she was telling me how Jolie locks her in a room when she asked to play with alice."

"Oh my god."

"Yeah, and that's not all. She said last night that Alice was a mistake and she said Rosalie, shouldn't of even been born."

"She sounds cruel."

He nodded, "She is. So, I needed to get out and leave. And I knew mom had a lot of extra space so, why not come here."

"Ethan you-"

Before I could finish Alice threw up all over me. Causing me and ethan both to jerk her up so she wouldn't choke. I ran her up to the bathroom and tied her hair back.

"Its okay Alice, just keep your head up." , I said patting her back.

Ethan ran up stairs with some new clothes and made her a shower.

Once she was done, she started crying and ran to Ethan.

"Its okay baby, daddys here."

I smiled at the thought of ethan being such a great dad.

"I'm gonna go cook breakfast, you should probably make sure she gets some medicine."

"Emily wait!"

"Yes?"

"I don't think mom has any medicine, could you go get some?"

I smiled, "Sure."

I went to my room to change. Thank god she didn't throw up on my hair or anything. I grabbed my keys and went down stairs to my car.

I pulled my phone out and searched what kind of medicine I should be getting her. Then, drove off.

Once I arrived at the store, I got call from  my doctor.

Hello?

Hi Emily, its doctor Actar. How are you today?

Well now a little scared, why are you calling?

Tomorrow I want to talk to you, okay? Be in my office by 8, have a good day.

What the hell. That was so weird. Why would he randomly be calling?

I shook it off and walked in the store. I went to the childrens medicine isle and began to look for the right medication.

"Don't we know each other?"

I looked up to see Jolie. personally, I wanted to beat her head in but I wont.

"Um yes. We met at graysons funeral. I'm Emily."

"Have you saw Ethan lately?", she asked.

"Why?"

She furrowed her eyebrows, "Because I know here lately Alice hasn't been feeling well, how is she?"

"Shes still sick. Actually that's what I'm doing here. Ethan asked me to pick her up some medicine. But I really don't know which one."

"Do you not have children?"

"No, but I should get going. goodbye."

she took a big huff and let go of my shoulder. No wonder why Ethan got her easy. She seems looser than a kite.

I checked my stuff out and made my way home.

I felt my phone vibrating again, so I reached my pocket to grab it.

Hello?

Emily, where are you?

I'm  almost there, who is this?

Lisa, we need you home right now.

I'm pulling in now.

That makes the second strange phone call ive had today.

I got out of my car and grabbed the medicine. I was kinda scared to go in. Lisa seemed worried.

I walked up to the front door and saw that the living room was empty. I walked to the kitchen and saw everyone sitting. Everyone was sad.

"What the hell happened?", I asked sitting the medicine down.

I felt someone come touch my arm, "Emily we need to talk. I need to talk to you and ethan both."

I turned around and saw Leah, "Why are you here?"

"Because there is something I need to tell you and ethan what I did in highschool. And now I regret."

"If you had sex with ethan, I really don't care."

Ethan stood up, "No, that would never happen."

"Then what is it?"

"Sit.", leah said pulling me a chair out.

I took in a deep breath and began to listen. I looked over at ethan and he seemed concerned.

"In high school, I'm sure you thought I hated you, didn't you?"

I shook my head, "You always acted like it."

"I didn't, I actually liked you. But I followed kayla. So I did something really bad."

"Oh my god leah, get to the point.". ethan yelled.

"Kayla told me to go pay your doctor a lot of money, to tell you, you cant have children. And he did it."

He did it.

________________________________
AN: hi loves. sorry if the ending seems weird. i honestly didn't know how to end this. but i hope you like it :)

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