Chapter 13
Eun-jung woke up to a continuous moan. Momentarily blinded by the morning sunlight, she spotted Euna in bed with a slight hand movement, eyes bound in bandage, one knee covered in a cast. Eun-jung sprung up, stumbling to her feet to get to her side. The severity of Euna's condition was harder to look up close. It was the kind of atrociousness Eun-jung thought could only happen in movies. Slowly Euna raised one hand to her face but Eun-jung intercepted. Instead, she whispered to her ear, "Everything will be okay." She spread a blanket over Euna, the same piece she was knitting last night when she had gotten a call from a stranger. The voice belonging to a doctor sounded deep and calm, but the news he brought had left her shaken and limped. She lost track on the number of times she had prayed that evening and only managed to breathe freely after Euna was wheeled out of the operating room.
"Seung-jin," whispered Euna in her faintest voice, struggling not to wince.
Eun-jung squeezed her hand and whispered, "Hush. She's with Father Vincent." With a little strength left, Euna tightened her grip on Eun-jung and murmured, "Hide-her."
"She's safe," Eun-jung answered. She sniffed a bit, wiping her eyes dry with the other hand. "You'll be safe, too. We'll move far away where they can't find you." Euna loosened her hold on Eun-jung but their hands remained clasped together. Except for the sound of the air-conditioning system, everything else in the room had returned to a quiet state.
Barely an hour later, a gray-haired eye surgeon appeared by the door and motioned to Eun-jung to follow him outside the room. The first thing she did was asked about Euna's eyesight.
"Both eyes suffered from massive injuries," the doctor started. "We tried saving it but the damage was tremendous. We don't have any other option left. She'll have to undergo eye transplant to regain her eyesight."
"Eye transplant?"
"We'll need to find the right donor. If everything goes well, she'll be able to see again."
Eun-jung was speechless for the rest of the morning. Her mind scrambled for ways on how to break the news to Euna. Moreover, she was dreading the idea of telling Tae-woo about his sister's condition.
A much younger doctor came out of the lift later that day. Tall and lean, a smart dresser even under a white coat. He looked in his 30s. He had a gentle look in his eyes, the kind that was nurturing and healing even to the most tattered souls. By word of mouth, his amiability apart from being a reputable bone surgeon had drawn more patients to him than any other doctor in his department.
He reached room 318 and found Eun-jung by the door, finishing a cup of coffee. Wearing a warm smile, the doctor introduced himself, "I'm Doctor Son Jae-gun. I'm the orthopedist-in-charge."
Eun-jung quickly lowered her coffee cup after recognizing the voice. Quickly she bowed and asked, "Were you the one who called last night?"
The doctor nodded. "I found her last night sprawling on the street. Her attackers had fled before I could see their faces. I'm sorry."
"Thank you for saving her life. I can't imagine what could've happened if you didn't arrive on time."
He smiled again, causing creases to appear on the sides of his mouth. "I did what any person would do under such circumstance." Peering inside, the doctor asked, "Is she awake?"
Eun-jung nodded. "She has spoken a few words."
"Good." Dr. Son entered the room, followed by Eun-jung. He examined the patient's breathing. Next he studied the chart, scribbled on the list and handed it to the nurse on duty. Turning to Eun-jung he said, "She's going to be fine. I'll send a therapist to work on her knee. She'll be up on her feet again in a few weeks' time."
Eun-jung hesitated before asking, "How much does it cost?"
The doctor glanced at his patient. "I'll take care of it."
"But..."
"We'll work on it until she gets completely healed." Dr. Son put one hand on Eun-jung's shoulder. "I'll help her."
"Thank you, doctor," said Eun-jung after giving him a bow.
On his way out, the doctor asked, "Do you know who did this to her?"
Eun-jung nodded.
"Have you reported this to the police?"
"I couldn't leave her like this."
"Doesn't she have any other relative?"
"I'm the only one she's got. Her brother is in prison. I'm her sister-in-law."
"Well, then, let's see what we can do."
"You're a kindhearted soul, Doctor Son. I can't thank you enough." Eun-jung bowed repeatedly.
Dr. Son took out a business card from his pocket and handed it to Eun-jung. She accepted with a stammering ‘thank you'.
Her jaw dropped long after the doctor was gone. To Eun-jung, his presence came like a burst of hues in the midst of grays. After spending time pondering on the earlier conversation, she went back to Euna's side and relayed the good news, though she wasn't sure how much of it she had understood because the only response she'd gotten was a slight nod.
Nurse Goh held Jung-hwa by the elbow as they walked inside Cheongdam Cathedral. It was the first time the elder Lee had seen the church after postponing the visit for more than a year. The conversations he had with Father Vincent in his house gave him a deep yearning for a total disclosure. Upon reaching a confessional, both stopped and looked at the green light above. "The priest is available, sajang-nim," Nurse Goh said. He opened the door and assisted the elder Lee inside. After making sure his employer was comfortable in his seat, the nurse took out the black wooden cane with him and gently closed the door.
The grid slid open. Jung-hwa heard the priest's voice through the lattice that was asking him to begin. He cleared his throat and inhaled deeply before he spoke.
"Father, forgive me for I have sinned. I've kept many secrets from my son for fear of hurting him. He grew up hating his mother for leaving us. My wife and I-separated when he was still young. What he doesn't know is-Mi-yeon is not his real mother. I don't know how to tell my son about this. He was a child I've sired with another woman. Mi-yeong tried to forgive, but I-it became too much when I didn't change my ways. My son is the only one I got, Father. I couldn't tell him the truth because I'm scared of losing him."
The priest calmly said, "It's not too late. Your son deserves to know. Mistakes are part of our lives. It's when we refuse to correct these mistakes that make us live in sin."
"But my sins are never ending, Father. I-I feel awful. There was-this-girl who duped my son years ago. She was a gang member. They plotted against him, deceived him, and then held him against his will to raise ransom money. But then something made her change her mind. I don't know why, maybe guilt… or pity, so my son was able to get out free… with her help. She decided to become a witness and turned against her gang mates. I pretended to have forgiven her, but I couldn't let it go. I tipped off the Chois, the family of her other victim. I want her to end up in prison, and she did."
There was a pause from the other side of the grid. The priest glimpsed through the lattice, unable to give a proper response. He took a moment to decipher what he had just heard. During this short span of silence, Jung-hwa broke into tears.
"I don't want to feel this way anymore, Father. I'm a prisoner of my own guilt."
Jung-hwa's cracked voice prompted the priest to speak. "Your guilt comes from the betrayal you've made. Anger is part of human nature and humans have no control over their emotions. But acting out on that anger is a choice. God gives us free will to make choices. What she did was wrong, but justice would've still been served even if you didn't intervene. By confessing your guilt today, you are setting yourself free."
Outside the confessional, Nurse Goh patiently waited as his eyes followed a trail of birds flying across in the high ceilings of the cathedral.
A bouquet of orchids lay serenely on one corner of the table, alongside a beaded rosary, a prayer book and a CD player. Above the table mounted against the wall was a double deck shelf, housing a stack of discs and some old books. The room which was merely 10 square meters in size had a small ventilation fan built on the upper part of the wall. There were no windows, no distinction of day and night, but it was the safest place Eun-jung could find for her. Euna sat by her lonesome on the foot of her bed, listening to soft music while sorting shells by its shapes. Soon Eun-jung came in with a water-filled vase and arranged the orchids stem by stem. Turning to Euna, she tried hiding the excitement in her voice. "What did you two talk about?"
"Nothing," uttered Euna, her blank gaze getting past Eun-jung.
"Come on, dongsaeng. You spent the entire afternoon together and you talked about nothing? He sends you flowers, brings you food, calls you on the phone, and there's nothing going on?"
Amused with her sister-in-law's persistence, Euna smiled. "He asked if he could visit everyday."
"And?"
"I said no."
"What?"
"You heard me."
"He obviously likes you. Why can't you like him too?
"Eonni, I'm blind."
"What's wrong if you're blind?"
"I shouldn't drag people into my mess."
"Give yourself a chance. He's handsome and so gentle. You can rarely find a man like him nowadays." Eun-jung sat beside Euna and cupped one of her hands. "Doctor Son is clearly smitten with you. I could see it in the way he takes care of you."
"He can find a better woman for himself."
Eun-jung smirked and let go of Euna's hand. "Ya, you can't push a man in love to find another woman."
"He's not in love with me," Euna insisted.
"You should see how he stares at you. And the distance he travels just to get here."
"He's just doing his job monitoring my knee."
"It's been six months, your therapy is over. You're doing well now. Don't pretend to be numb." Eun-jung placed one hand over Euna's cheek. "Trust me. It's okay to fall in love."
Euna's face stiffened. "I only want to be with my child."
"But she'll need a father, too."
"Should I accept him just because my daughter needs a father?"
"I'm sorry. I don't mean it that way," Eun-jung said, her voice turning low.
"Eonni, don't say sorry. I know you want what's good for me. But what's good for me may not be good for the others. I want to live my life without hurting anyone again. I just want to be with Seung-jin again."
"It's going to happen soon, I promise you. We'll find a way," Eun-jung said, her eyes turning earnest while a thought came to her mind. She didn't have anything concrete in her hands yet, but if she were to believe Tae-woo's words, Euna's safety would be at hand soon.
"Have you talked to her today?"
"I called an hour ago. Seung-jin was sleeping. Father Vincent said our princess is raring to go to school already. He's contemplating on this possibility next year."
"Isn't she too young? She would only be two and a half by then."
"Father Vincent says she's intelligent for her age."
A look of worry came across Euna's face. "He didn't bring this up the last time he called. I should talk to him first."
"Don't worry about it. You know Father Vincent is taking good care of Seung-jin," said Eun-jung.
Euna's eyes, dull and motionless, turned misty and red. "I want to see her write her first alphabet."
"You will see her write her first alphabet."
The school bell rang at exactly eleven in the morning. Ji-heon looked at his watch and wished So-ra would come out right away. He didn't have much time with a court hearing in an hour, but he couldn't possibly set aside his weekly visit to the child. With one hand in his pocket, and the other holding a bag of candies and crayons, Ji-heon treaded the grounds back and forth, peeking at the painted blue sky every now and then. A little later, So-ra came hollering ‘ajussi' from behind. He turned around with a ready smile. From a distance, he could see So-ra with Father Vincent a few feet behind holding a toddler in his arms. Children started to spill into the grounds and soon, the place was filled with noise. Ji-heon wasted no time and hurried toward Father Vincent and So-ra.
"Good morning, my favorite ajussi!" So-ra threw her arms around Ji-heon's waist.
"Good morning, princess!" Ji-heon greeted and then nodded at Father Vincent. Strangely, the priest had a forced smile. Something was wrong, Ji-heon thought to himself. Father Vincent was less cheerful, a bit timid today. Still, Ji-heon greeted, pretending not to notice the change. "Good morning, Father Vincent." His eyes shifted to the toddler, a little girl with pigtails and rosy chubby cheeks. Her eyes, small but wide, were smiling at him like she was welcoming him in her own little way. As So-ra engaged Ji-heon in small talks, the little girl tried to wiggle free from Father Vincent. Wobbly but overeager, she took small steps toward Ji-heon and locked her hands around his thigh. Ji-heon knelt and hugged her back. As their cheeks brushed against each other, Ji-heon felt a strange sensation in him. His heart palpitated in her nearness. When the little girl pulled back, she squealed and clenched both her hands in glee, her smile revealing two newly grown front teeth. As Seung-jin yawned and exhaled, her breath slightly touched his skin. Each little action drew him closer, like there was some invisible connection between the two of them. Ji-heon lifted the little girl in his arms and asked, "What's your name?"
Father Vincent coughed and looked in the direction of the exit gate where the students stood in queue. "Excuse me, Ji-heon ssi. I will be back." He headed off to the gate and helped lead the children out.
Meanwhile, So-ra asked Ji-heon to sit with her in an outdoor table together with the little girl.
"Her name is Seung-jin," So-ra said while taking a look at the gifts she had gotten today.
"Seung-jin, what a lovely name. Is she a special student here?"
"Father Vincent picks her up in the morning and returns to the convent in the afternoon. She's staying with the nuns."
"An orphan?"
So-ra looked at Seung-jin who was on top of the table, holding several pieces of crayons in her hands. "I don't know. I never saw her mommy and daddy, so I guess she is one."
"Do you enjoy being an eonni to her?" Ji-heon asked, taking glimpses at the little girl, touching her cheeks from time to time.
"Yes, she's my dongsaeng and I love her," So-ra said. She put a piece of candy into Seung-jin's mouth. "I think I'll ask eomma to adopt her someday."
Another sound of bell reminded Ji-heon of his appointment that day. He realized he was getting late. Bending over, he kissed So-ra on the forehead. Seung-jin seeing Ji-heon so close to So-ra, quickly pulled him back and kissed him on the cheek. She clung on to his neck like she too, wanted to be kissed. Ji-heon and So-ra both laughed with Seung-jin's gesture. Ji-heon reciprocated, wrapping his arms around the little girl and kissing her on the forehead. Seung-jin stared at his face, her innocent eyes beaming brightly as she squealed. Her feet thumped while her hands tugged at her necklace, pulling out a leaf-shaped pendant and a red silk pouch from her unbuttoned collar. Ji-heon kissed the little girl on the nose, making her squeal louder. This time she tugged at her necklace with more force, causing it to snap and fall to the table. He reached for the necklace and thought the pendant looked familiar. The pouch that was looped together with the pendant had broken seams, leaving a small opening on one side. "Can you give this to Father Vincent?" Ji-heon handed the necklace to So-ra, his eyes still on the pendant. So-ra obliged but instead of keeping it in her pocket she pulled the remaining thread from the pouch until it was completely opened. A small plastic sachet fell out, containing bits of pieces of paper. Curiously, So-ra spread the content on the table and immediately pieced everything together like she was forming a puzzle. Ji-heon was about to leave the table when he heard So-ra say, "Ajussi, please take a look!" A numbing chill swept over him at the sight of the image. He stared without blinking; his hands gripped the edge of the table. He suddenly realized his palpitations. His heart never calmed down after Seung-jin came to him. Before Ji-heon could take his eyes off the completed puzzle, Seung-jin leaned over and planted another kiss on his cheek.