it was night time by the time joochan went home, as always. but for once,
his parents were standing at the door the moment he unlocked it.
his father wore a glare, his mother, eyes of terror. he switched his gaze between the two, and then his father walked up.
"you," he said, voice quaking like it usually did, right before he hits him. "your teacher called."
before joochan could recall why, a sharp pain was felt at his leg. his eyes widened, saw a thin, red mark form.
"i told you to behave." his father pointed the cane in joochan's face. "you're always disappointing me."
the boy clenched his jaw, stood rooted to the ground. "funny how your expectations don't apply to yourself."
another stroke came down; same leg, same area. he winced, bit his teeth together.
"there you go again, talking back." his eyes were dark, merciless. "learn how to show your father some goddamned respect."
joochan looked at him in disbelief. "you should've taught me better, father."
another stroke. at that point, he was barely afraid of anything. so he looked up, blew the hair away from his eyes, glared at his father.
"well, i guess you couldn't have," he said, "after what you've done."
another. he felt his leg go numb, but he stood, unmoving. it could tear apart and break for all he cared at that moment.
"i don't understand why i have to live your life just because you messed up yours." joochan spoke in a tone he never had to his father before, one filled with rage yet pure confusion.
another stroke. he saw it coming, barely flinched.
"you never seem to think about anyone but yourself. have you ever thought how many people are suffering because you don't confess?" the words came out before he could stop them, before he could take them back.
another, even harder. he couldn't even feel the pain anymore.
he scoffed, smiled at him. "do it again," he challenged.
and he did. joochan's smile widened.
"why not, why don't you just kill me?" he suggested. "you're aging. getting angry isn't good for your health. wouldn't want my existence to piss you off any more, would we?"
his mother, watching, silent, all this while, finally spoke, "joochan — "
"relax, mom," he interrupted, eyes still fixed on his father. "just showing you to what extend he'd hurt me," — his gaze shifted to his mother — "so he won't lay a hand on you.
there was silence. no sound of the cane, no sound of their voices. finally, joochan felt like he had won. he smiled to himself.
"after all," his met his father's gaze for the last time that night, "you're all he ever loves."