Can I Have This Dance?
Chapter 13
The next morning I woke up feeling normal. I decided to wash my face so that I was fully awake. I got to the bathroom which was luckily unoccupied and looked at my reflection in the mirror which I do every morning.
It was then that I saw my cheek that was slightly, but hardly swollen and a bruise was starting to form. Yesterdays events started to replay in my head. School, Clair, the football game, the party, Alex, the guy and...............
I didn't let myself remember the next event in detail as I felt tears starting to form in my eyes. All of a sudden I felt disgusted by myself, I provoked it I guess. I felt revolted by my own reflection and decided to take a shower, making sure that I washed and conditioned my hair since it smelt of the swimming pool.
When I had finished I brushed my teeth and went back to my room to get dressed. I threw on a pink vest top and black linen shorts which rose about 3cm from my knees, also making sure I put some make-up over the bruise, I didn't want questions being asked.
When I was done I said a lame morning to Aaron who didn't bother asking why I was acting like this, which was good. I grabbed cereal and went to eat it upstairs.
When I had finished it, I went straight downstairs to put my plate in the sink and then went back to my room, running when I heard my phone ringing. I checked the caller ID which read Alex
"Hello?" I asked out of breath
"Hey Nicki, you alright?" Alex asked
"Yeah, I was just running," I replied
"Oh alright, how are you?" he asked
"I've been much better," I muttered
"Right.......er, why didn't you let me beat the sh** out of that guy?" he asked sounding frustrated
The rest of the events following my almost rape popped into my head. Me screaming, Alex beating him up, me crying, lying to the guys, Alex asking me 'that' question and me asking him to stay until I fell asleep. I smiled first at the fact that he did it without hesitation, but then realised that he probably did it out of sympathy.
"You already beat him unconscious," I reminded him
"But that means that he can wake up," he said sounding as dangerous as yesterday when I answered his question.
"Can we just........stop talking about this," I said getting more and more unwanted images popping up in my head of him dead...........
"Yeah sorry, sorry. What are you doing today?" he asked
"Dunno, just gonna stay away from everyone," I stated
"Why?" he asked and I could tell he was confused
"I don't want to disgust them with the face that I provoked that guy to do that," I said my voice cracking as tears started to flow down my face.
"WHAT?! Nicki, you didn't provoke him, that guy was a psycho. How could you provoke him..........," he sighed
"Did you flirt with him?" he asked again
"If asking him for a towel is flirting?" I asked trying to joke even though I'm sure that the pain was evident in my voice.
"It's not, therefore you didn't provoke him. Don't ever think about yourself like that. It wasn't your fault there's just some crazy people in this world. Ok?" he asked trying to reassure me that it wasn't my fault. When I didn't answer he repeated himself.
"OK?" he asked again
"Yeah," I said sniffling. I wiped my tears still not sure whether it was my fault or not.
"Do you want me to come round?" he asked sounding hesitant
"Err...........," I said starting to answer when Clair stormed in and screamed
"YOU F**KING WHORE!"
"Is that Clair?" he asked in the phone
"Yeah," I said hearing the disgust in my own voice.
"Oh, are you upset that you got in trouble by mummy?" I asked
"What the hell did you do, she was on my side like an hour before that!" she screamed coming towards me.
"I'm defiantly coming over," Alex said through the phone, I even forgot he was there.
"If you insist," I said to him
"Who is that?" she asked as I put it on speaker, just before she stole the phone from my hand.
"Nicki will call you back," she said about to hang up when Alex spoke.
"Clair, give her back the phone now."
"Alex?! Did she call you? Desperate I know," she said kind of answering her own question
"Get a life Clair and give it back. Am I on loud speaker?" he asked after sounding confused
"Yeah," I shouted
"Why should I?" she asked him
"I'll go back out with you," he answered and I could hear the stupid smirk in his voice
She grinned at me about to hand it back while I sat stunned. When she handed it to me he shouted
"SIKE!" before bursting out laughing which made me laugh, before he hung up.
I was too busy laughing, which was a surprise since I was completely and utterly revolted by myself not too long ago.
My mood instantly went down when I realised this, making me stop laughing at once.
"This is your entire fault, everything is always your fault!" she shrieked before diving for me on my bed. I screamed, but dodged, making her shout in frustration. I wasn't in the mood for a fight so I made a run for it.
As I was exiting my room I bashed into Aaron who quickly held me up as I was about to fall.
"Thanks," I said causing him to nod
"Clair get out before I make you," Aaron threatened as I ignored her dirty look as she walked out of the room. Not too soon after I heard the house door slam, signifying that she left the house.
"So you gonna tell me what's wrong?" he asked
I felt really bad that he didn't know and he was my brother and so I decided that he had a right to know.
"Promise not to get mad. Come sit beside me?" I said as his face became worried.
"Yesterday at the party......" I started getting scared
"Yeah......" he said trying to push it out of me
"I wasn't sleeping when I left, I was crying," I said, this was the easy part.
"Why, did Alex do something to you?" he asked getting angry already.
"No! Actually go stand up for this part," I insisted making him do as I asked still confused.
"I went to get a towel and some guy asked me if I wanted him to show me," I continued
"He looked quite friendly and even though I didn't want him to, I agreed. Then he led me to one of Blake's rooms," I continued again
"Blake has a closet for towels, so I'm sure there were no towels in any rooms," he said. Great he tells me now!
"See, I didn't know that then. I thanked him since he couldn't find any, but he stopped me and guarded the door. Then he came into my face causing me to walk back until I fell on the bed." I said
I stood up and faced away from him not wanting to see his expression when I told him.
"He jumped on me, then...........," I trailed on the event replaying in my head making me cry.
"DAMN IT NICKI??!! WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME???!!!!" he shouted making me wince as he punched my wall. I continued anyway
"I screamed and cried, when Alex busted in as he was starting to pull my clothes off. He beat him unconscious before he came to me and I didn't want to tell any of you because you were having a great time.................," I added since it was true
"ALEX KNEW! I SHOULD HAVE KILLED THAT MAN! I should have been there.........." He said sounding guilty. I turned around instantly walking over to him slowly
"This isn't your fault, it was my fault ok. I must have provoked him; why else would he have done that. I know, maybe I looked slutty, so he thought that I go ahead with it, but I didn't," I figured out. He looked up straight away looking as angry as anyone could ever look. More dangerous than Alex just sounded.
"Don't you EVER think that you provoked him. If what you told me was what happened, that guy is a sh** face who deserves to be killed for even touching you," he said holding my shoulders and looking into my watery eyes.
I wiped my eyes the bottom of my top (the inside part), wiping my cheek since it was wet. When I saw the make-up on my top I looked at Aaron who stared at me before his face grew angrier, which I thought couldn't even be possible.
I guess he noticed. I did the first thing that came to mind. I RAN!
"NICKI!!" he screamed running down the stairs after me.
I ran down the stairs and opened the door bashing into Alex in the process knocking me back. He caught me, looking at me confused before he grew as angry as Aaron.
"DID HE DO THIS?" they both shouted outraged at the same time.
I sighed as I tried to run away again only to be caught by both of them.
"Let me go please," I begged both of them as they carried an arm, lifting me and putting me on the chair as they both stared down at me.
"Alex, why didn't you tell me?" Aaron asked
"I was obviously gonna tell you, she's your sister so you deserved to know. But it wasn't the right time yet," Alex replied
Aaron sighed before they both looked back at me.
"Did that mother f****er do this?" Aaron asked
"No," I mumbled which wasn't believable enough
"Did he hit you?!" he asked as his voice grew angrier
"Yes," I mumbled again
"Sh**" Alex mumbled walking up and down pacing.
"We have to find this guy. Did you see what he looked like?" Aaron asked
"Yeah, should we go look for him, I'm sure he lives around here somewhere," Alex urged
"NO!" I cried loudly, making them give me a look causing me to just shut up and look down.
"Oh sh** I just remember that I told Amber I'd take her out," Aaron said
"Don't worry I'll call her to cancel, this is more important," he said pulling out his phone.
"No, don't worry we can do it anytime, since he must live near by, you go, I'll look after her," Alex insisted
"Are you sure?" Aaron asked
"Yeah, don't worry about it," Alex answered
"Cause I have to go now, to pick her up?" Aaron asked again
"Go!" Alex said
"Alright, bye Nicki. Look after her," he said lastly to Alex as he said bye as well. I just sat there sobbing on the chair. The guy was drunk maybe it was an accident. Drinking can make people do some crazy things.
I heard Alex sigh when the door closed, before he came and wrapped his arms around me as I sobbed into his shirt.
"Don't worry well get him," he said
"That's the problem, I don't want you to go after him," I stated instantly feeling him move away from me
"Are you serious?! If this happened to Aly or Katie or Emily, would you want to let the guy get away?!" he asked getting angry
"No, but......," I started
"Exactly, so why do you think that we'll let this happen as an exception for you. You're my friend and Aaron's your brother so how do you think we feel? What if Aiden heard?" he asked and I knew he would react just like them if not worse, I was like his little sister (by a few months) that he never had.
"I get it," I replied
"Thank you and you need to stop thinking it's your fault alright, just cause you're beautiful doesn't mean that you provoked it. It's not your fault you look like this is it?" he asked
"No," I muttered
"Exactly........(sighing). Come here." He said opening his arms which welcomed me easily. I rested in his arms as he softly kissed my head my yesterday night.
"Don't worry," he said lastly before switching on the TV.
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