Jack's point of view
The morning was cold, which was unlike the usual weather of this time of year. The clouds outside had turned an ominous gray that contrasted the light of yesterday, but still no rain poured out. The room was dark because of this, and I woke up alone in Finn's bed. It couldn't have been any later than 6:30.
A dull ache began to throb in my legs and pound at my temples, which was partly due to the constant dull buzz from a phone near my head. I rolled over, assuming it was mine. It already sat unlocked, nearly blinding me when I picked it up. My tired state prevented me from realizing it wasn't my phone until I had already read through half of two text conversations.
Me: I fucked him, can I have my money now?
Sillie Sink: motherfuck
Foah Schnapple: darn. Okay. Monday.
Sillie Bobby Brown: ugh
Sillie Bobby Brown: did you kick him out yet?
Gayten: yeah what's his name? Jake?
Me: Jack
Me: and no I gotta wait until he wakes up
Me: didn't I tell you my cold dead heart always wins?
Another message popped up at the top of the screen. I stupidly clicked on it.
Lucas 😬: hey baby! I wanna see you again! Text me back ;)
My clothes were scattered around the floor and the only thing to warm up my shivering body was Finn's thin blanket. My blood boiled and anger bubbled in the pit of my stomach. I heard footsteps emerging from the direction of the bathroom, and I stood up and scrambled to get my clothes on.
"Woah, princess, you're leaving so early? It's only 6:45."
I couldn't convey my feelings in words. I shook my head and chucked his phone at him, hitting him square in the chest and falling onto the finished wood floor and, hopefully, shattering.
I can't believe you trusted him. I can't believe you thought he changed. I can't believe he was your first everything. I can't believe you. I can't believe you.
"B-baby, what's wrong?" He asked, taking shaky steps towards me.
"You! Y-y-you're what's wrong! I was all just a b-b-bet t-to you!" I couldn't help but stutter, and I knew that if I didn't leave soon I'd start to cry and I didn't want to give Finn that satisfaction. "You only wanted to f-f-fuck me! You were never going to stay!"
"What are you talking about? Of course I'm going to stay."
"I read your fucking texts!"
His eyes widened,"N-no, you weren't just a bet, you're not- no! D-don't go!" He pleaded, grabbing my hand as I made my way out of his bedroom door.
"I t-thought you loved me! Y-you said you loved me!" I started to cry, my anger replaced with sobs. "I t-thought I was g-g-good enough."
"You are! Let me explain, Jack, please," I yanked my hand away from his tight grip, making my way down the stairs.
"There's nothing to explain," my voice cracked. I let the tears stream out of my eyes, not caring whether he saw anymore. "I can't b-believe I fucking fell for you. You bet my fucking life so that you could get a p-pathetic amount of money. I feel bad for your other boyfriend, because only f-f-fools fall for you, Wolfhard. Go to hell."
"Jack, please, I d-didn't want to hurt you, I didn't mean it!"
"That's bullshit! If you didn't mean it you w-wouldn't have texted your friends all about how you fucked me! I'm not some fucking toy you can play with for a while and then throw away!"
"It's not! Please, just stay," he pleaded even more, holding onto anything he could. I could barely breath or make out a response, so I ran out, slamming the door behind me.
No matter how much I didn't want to leave, my sobs were beginning to get to be too much and my head ached worse than if a jackhammer had taken its toll on it. I wanted to stay in Finn's arms and call him ratboy and pretend that nothing even happened and go back to how it was less than twenty four hours ago, but that's not how life works. I wasn't happy, and if I wasn't happy maybe I didn't want to be anything at all.
My brain started working when I walked into my house. Or maybe it didn't. I wasn't sure. I knew I wasn't good enough for him, that he wouldn't change for someone as irrelevant as me. I shouldn't have let him weave me into his web of lies, and I shouldn't have let him be my first.
I shouldn't have fallen in love with him.
I had shut my phone off and discarded it, immediately making my way to the bathroom and slamming the door shut. It was Sunday, and my parents always worked early on Sundays.
(Trigger)
I watched as the bathtub slowly filled with water, steam rising from it like fog off a lake. I couldn't remember taking my clothes off or even getting into the piping hot water. The only thing that stuck was unscrewing a blade from a pencil sharpener. Deep down, I thought that was what I deserved for being such an idiot.
I threw aside the tiny, tiny rational part of me that was telling me that I should have expected that from Finn. That I could go to anyone, anyone, and they would help me through it. Again, that's not how life works.
"I love you, ratboy," I muttered, staring at the wall as I pressed the blade to the inside of my wrist. I didn't cut deep at first, only making the lines horizontal instead of vertical. I wanted to feel the pain first.
The sound of tiny droplets of blood mixed with the sound of the leaking faucet. I wasn't able to decipher which was which, or if my left arm was even bleeding at all, or if the shower was really dripping water. I couldn't, I couldn't, I couldn't.
A dry laugh escaped my mouth, and I realized I had hit the ultimate pinnacle of crazy. My mind wandered to the night before, how at peace I felt with myself while I was having fun with my friends and boyfriend.
Boyfriend.
One is for F, two is for I, three and four are for N. Keep going, Jack. You deserve it, fool.
"Do you actually like Jack?" Wyatt murmured from the kitchen. It had been the middle of the party, and he offered to help Finn grab the cake. I obviously needed to eavesdrop.
I heard Finn sigh. The sound made my stomach drop before he could continue. "I don't know. That came out wrong. I do know! I do know, but I...I think I might love him, Wyatt."
The smile that I thought would never leave had actually slipped off pretty fast, who would've thought.
W. O. L. F. H. A. R. D. Twelve is for Satan's human form.
I forced myself to look down at the stained water. It had turned a pale pink. My wrist was a mess, and the blood made me feel light headed.
I dropped the blade, the 'clank' sound alarming me even though I saw it coming. But it didn't scare me as much as the chime of the doorbell downstairs did.
My body felt numb, almost. It was weird, because I had never felt as out of myself as I had at that very moment. The doorbell rang again, but this time I giggled at the funny sound before I fell asleep. Or passed out from seeing so much blood. Maybe even blood loss who knows.
Twelve is for Finn Wolfhard.
Finn's point of view
"Fuck!"
My hand was bloody, and two holes sat right next to each other on my white bedroom wall. My parents were going to kill me if someone else didn't do it first.
I let my back slide down the wall. I could only think about how much I screwed up, and how insignificant it seemed until it actually happened. I mean, I did tell you I knew I liked Jack, right? So why did I have to go and try to win the stupid fucking bet anyway.
My phone buzzed from it's broken position on the floor, but I didn't care. I sat and I sat and I sat until I heard the front door ringing and practically drilling a hole into my head. I was almost completely sure I had broken my hand from punching the wall when I tried to use it to get up.
The ringing switched to frantic knocking. There stood a tear-stained Wyatt and sobbing Jaeden, which confused me. "Woah! W-what's wrong? Why are you two crying?"
I immediately got a bad feeling, and panic bubbles in my chest.
It's okay, it's okay, nothing happened, nothing-
"It's Jack," Wyatt said numbly.
I don't know why, or how, but I started to cry. "What about Jack?" my voice cracked as I yelled.
"He's in the hospital."
•
The plastic waiting room chairs didn't help ease my anxiety, they only made me feel more restless. Jack's parents hadn't heard anything, which meant they wouldn't tell me or anyone else anything.
I sat alone, away from everyone else. Reylynn had her head hidden in Talia's chest, and they both broke the silence in the room with their sobs. Everyone else only felt the same thing: numb.
The worst part was that nobody knew why except for me. Nobody knew that he was sitting in that bathtub with a bloody wrist because I decided to bet on him and his willingness to fuck me. Because I'm a Wolfhard, and Wolfhards apparently don't lose.
I'm an asshole. I know that, okay? But I do genuinely love Jack and I put so much effort into material things for him but not enough material into trying to get him to stay because I knew that the second he threw on my hoodie laying on the floor and grabbed his things that there was no chance my boyfriend wouldn't leave. I should have tried harder to get him to stay.
"Excuse me, young man?"
Someone's fucking talking to you, dickhead, look up.
"Hello? Young man?"
I looked up at the face of the old nurse who held a concerned expression. "Your hand looks badly damaged, would you like me to take a look at it?"
I searched for help on Jack's mother's face. She nodded through her silent tears, "Yes, go get your hand sorted out, we'll let you know if they say anything."
I hesitantly followed the nurse down the hall, sitting on the bed as she instructed. She gathered a bunch of weird things, pouring something on my hand that made it sting. "Fuck!" She gave me a pointed look. "Sorry, ma'm."
"How did this happen?"
"I punched a wall."
"Well why would you go and do something as dumb as that?"
"Cause I screwed up."
She sat in a chair across from the bed. A bandage was around my hand, and I hadn't even noticed her put it on. "Tell me."
So I told her, hot tears of frustration emptying out halfway through the story. "I just love him so much!"
She shook her head disappointedly. "Now, pardon my French, but that was a fucked up thing to do, Finn."
I nodded in agreement, wiping my eyes with my sweater sleeve. "I don't know how to help you there. Look at that! Fifty five years of old woman wisdom and I cannot help. I'd say just talk to his friends, and talk to your friends. Maybe then you'll get a change to go near him. You know I heard about that poor boy who came in earlier because of a suicide attempt and my heart damn near broke, boy! That was a terrible thing to do, and I hope you fix it, son."
I looked down ashamedly, letting the droplets of salty water hit my jeans. "I'll try. Thank you."
"Come back here when it's sorted out. Let me know what happened. If you don't come back, well I'll know exactly what happened."
I exited the room and made it halfway down the hall before running back. "Wait! Y-you said you heard about him earlier. Is-is my boyfriend going to die?"
"He did bleed a lot, son. We can't determine that yet."
_______
Anyone cry?