She could not tell how many table cloths she had knitted or how many letters she had written to her father as she awaited for him to wake up. She refused to leave his side, and she greatly blamed herself for not going for him sooner.
Because of the delicate nature of the affair, it had been handled with all the delicacy it required. Miss de Bourgh could never be admitted back at Rosings, but Lady Catherine supplied her with all the necessary means to stay in Fishland and continue living as her station in life befits her. Mr Woodland had handled Wickham's case with all the discretion it required, and for Lidya's sake, Elizabeth had refrained from strangling him. He was incarcerated for the rest of his life, and Lidya, free of her marriage vows had gone back to Lobgbourn to gossip with her mother about the army officers that she hoped would marry her. Captain Filtzwillam and Kitty endeavoured to fully adopt Louisa and Penelope and Jane and Mr Bingley were left with little choice but to take little Margaret, who was hardly a year old,into their charge.
Elizabeth wished to adopt Ella and Anne as well, to give them a right to use the Darcy name and not be branded with the name of Wickham, but she could not do such a thing without his permission. She could forgive him if he woke up and never wanted to see either of the twins in his sight, their father had done enough to hurt him already, yet Elizabeth did not know if she could let the children go. She loved them as much as she loved the son who nursed at her breast now, they had become her children, and she had become their mother, their protector and their object of admiration.
She slept in the chair besides the bed, she had insisted that they lay him in her room when they had first brought him from Fishland. Elizabeth remembered the day with dread, the day he had looked at her with all the happiness in the world before closing his eyes and not opening them again for three months now. Mr Woodland had ran very fast for the carriage and together with Mr Bingley, they had carried Mr Darcy to the nearest town where a doctor had confirmed to them that he was still alive and treated his wounds before they had brought him back to Pemberly.
Three times a day, Mr Richardson came to the room to administer his medicine and change his bandages, Elizabeth could hardly believe it when he told her that he was feeding him from the liquid that was connected to him through a tube and a needle. Every day, Elizabeth badgered the old doctor with questions.
"How is he? " Was her first question after his usual examination.
"His wounds are healing beautifully, no infection, "the doctor replied.
"I did not ask of the state of his wounds but the state of him. Will he wake up? "
"I hope so Mrs Darcy, but I am no God. "
"It has been four months! "
"A half and three Mrs Darcy, you should stop worrying too much it is no good for little Fil."
"Fil is fine," Elizabeth said in annoyance. Everyone seemed to have taken up the habit of scolding her that stressing herself was not good for her baby, but she did not choose to be stressed, seeing your husband in such a state could stress anyone.
She only left the room to go to the chapel, where she knelt down and prayed that he may recover his health, that he may open his eyes once more and see his son.
Having run out of the things to do while she waited for him to wake up, she decided to write to him. She could not talk to him, but at least she could write her thoughts to him. She began her letter as follows,
My dear Mr Darcy,
As I write this letter, you lie down there, and I begin to doubt if you will ever wake up at all. But I have to inform you of the going ons at Pemberly. Georgina no longer comes by as she used to, she is heavy with child, and Woodland does not let her out of his sight, lest she goes on a horse.
Dearest Jane and Bingley come to dine with me everyday which is very much expected of them, as they are both very sweet creatures indeed.
Ella can now read the map of England, and Anne plays as beautifully as Georgiana used to even though she is only four. She draws too, yesterday, she drew you a set of flowers, which I have now hung in the hallway because the room is already full with all her drawing.
I cannot bring myself to tell you about the other child at Pemberly, for I need you to see him for yourself and form your own opinion of his character.
None of the tenants is giving me much trouble, and now that I have Mr Woodland as the general overseer of your properties,your businesses are running as smoothly as you would have run them, and I still make a lot of decisions that you would call 'self preservative' but which are greatly improving your profits by the year.
I am about to cry and I know it is silly of me, but I miss you a great deal, and I wish you were awake so I could...
Elizabeth paused her pen at that point, the hairs at the back of her neck stood up in alarm. She sensed a presence behind her, someone was standing very still behind her, still and close, close enough to read the contents of her letter. She held her pen tighter and assumed a defensive posture, slowly, she turned around to face the intruder, and her pen clattered to the floor when she saw who it was.
"I am dying for you to finish that sentence Lizzy dearest, tell me what you would do if I were awake," he said with a smile.
It took Elizabeth a while to reassure herself that she was not dreaming, that he was awake and talking and smiling at her. She embraced him with all the strength she could master, and her returned her embrace with the little strength he had left in him before he collapsed on the bed.
She ordered a very light but energizing meal brought to him, and she fed him from her own hand. He remembered very little concerned his ordeal with Wickham except that he had struggled to stay awake the whole time because he could never bear the thought of dying without her by his side.
Throughout the day, she kept him to herself, not letting anyone else know that he was awake.He asked about her, what had happened in his absence, she told him all except one thing, one thing that he needed to see for himself and not just be told.
The next few days saw him recover a great deal of his strength, he was able to walk around the house and even go to the stables. By the end of the week, Elizabeth decided he was strong enough to handle anything.
"I have a gift for you, "Elizabeth started the conversation that evening after dinner.
"You need not give me a gift, if you want to ask me if we could adopt Ella and Anne, by answer is yes, they are lovely children, and with you as their mother, they will grow into very fine girls."
Elizabeth beamed at him in joy, appreciating the lengths he was going through to love the children of the man he hated, "It is not that,even though I was going to ask for that eventually. Mrs Tompkins, please bring him in," Elizabeth called out to the housekeeper whom she had instructed to wait outside the room with the child.
Elizabeth took Fil from the housekeeper and thanked her very much before she turned to Darcy, who was sitting on the bed with a very confused look and handed him the bundle of silk and fine clothing.
The look of confusion on his face slowly dissolved as his eyes registered first shock, then surprise and finally pure undiluted joy as he held his son for the first time. Elizabeth sat beside him and helped him admire their fine son.
"He has your eyes," he whispered as he held out a finger to Fil who grabbed it with an intense ferocity, "and your temper."
Elizabeth nodded, "But everything else seems to be yours. "
He held the baby closer to his chest and smiled, "Oh Lizzy! You keep on making me the happiest man on earth every day. What could I ever do to repay you? "
Elizabeth smiled, "Well, you could start by purchasing a few gowns, then jewellery, about a hundred pieces a month would do. "
She had meant it as a joke, but to her horror, he nodded his head seriously, "You got it. "
"No,I did not mean... " Elizabeth began to protest.
"Sh," he said rocking his son in his arms, "with this as a gift to me, you will never need to apologize for anything. "
"Do you not want to know what I named him?" Elizabeth asked.
"I care not whether you named him baboon or scarecrow, I only care that he is my son."
"Really? What if I tell you his name is Catherine after your aunt? "
He raised up his face in alarm, "It is not though,is it? "he asked in panic.
Elizabeth laughed out loudly at him, "You see? You do care what he is named. "
"Alright, I care a little bit, as long as it is not a name reserved for the female species, I am fine. But I am dying to know, what did you call him?"
"His name is Fil," Elizabeth answered.
He smiled again, a wide smile that reminded Elizabeth of all the reasons she loved him, " I thought you hated the name?"
"I do hate the name. You must admit that Filtzwillam is a ridiculous first name."
"Now you will be forced to call him the name you refuse to call me. "
"Darcy suits you better, just like Fil suits him," Elizabeth said softy.
"And Elizabeth suits you best, for it is a name given to queens, and you are my queen," he said, his voice equally soft.
They looked at each other for a long moment,and then they looked at their son, and in that instant, Elizabeth knew that if he had died, she would have followed him within the year, for they were like one soul in different bodies, and their son was now the link that kept those pieces together.
The end.