Liam threw his schoolbag across his room the minute he stepped inside. It had been a long day for Liam Payne, the day’s events still heavily hanging over him. He stood silently at the door of his room, briefly looking at the trail of mess that had been left when the bag had been hurled, knocking over the stuff that was on his desk. Pens and pencils now littered the floor, pages of revision knocked out of their once organised pile. A shaky sigh left his mouth, his bottom lip trembling as much as his shaking hands were. He blinked, his eyes starting to well up as he looked at the mess he had caused.
The teenager let out a cry of anger which expressed the amount of strained emotion he’d been carrying around all day. He stepped away from the door and slammed it shut, kicking it into its place with an angry grunt, using the force to push him off the wall and into his room. He paced around his room, kicking at his office chair and other random objects that were laid across his bedroom floor. His feet stamped and kicked the revision papers as his mind told him to throw his weight around and ruin everything. What was revision now, would he even get any decent A Level marks? Why would a university even want him, a broken mess of a boy.
The thought further drove him insane. His hands quickly flew to the handles of his wardrobe doors, his grip so intense that he would have left a dent if the wood was any weaker than it was. The doors were opened, one of them slamming against his blue walls with a loud bang. The teenager quickly started to raid his closet, throwing clothes after clothes out of it and around the room before he finally found what he was looking for. He scooped up the pristinely hung hoodie and pulled it out, holding it by the shoulders as he looked over it with his brown eyes.
Only one of his friends would wear a hoodie like this to Liam’s house a little while ago and be forgetful enough to leave it. Liam’s hand still shook as his grip tightened on the dark green fabric. His brown eyes closed as the hint of his friends smell came to him. That rich scent that he longed to smell on his skin, in his bed sheets, maybe his own hoodie. His bottom lip once again trembled as he brought it closer to him.
He hated Harry Styles. He hated the way he walked, the way he talked, every little thing about him. Liam hated how cocky he was, how much of an utter twat he was, every inch of his personality. He hated the fact that those two green eyes always seemed to have him hooked, and even after the boy had punched him in the face, he hated the way he still wanted to crawl into his arms and hope that he’d never let him go.
But Harry Styles has let him go.
Liam flopped down on his bed with a broken sob. His large hands quickly found his swollen face, the hope of comfort coming from pushing the boy’s hoodie into his face not meeting Liam. The lack of comfort caused the boy to push his body into his duvet. His mind kept coming up with more reasons to hate Harry Styles as he forced his watery brown eyes shut.
His light chuckle. The way he looked at Liam in utter hatred. The way his foot always seemed to tap out a rhythm when listening to music. The way his hands felt when pushing against Liam’s body in anger.
Each positive seemed to come with a more realistic negative, which only drove the boy to start releasing cracked sobs into the silence of his war torn room. His body shuddered as he kept his face forced into the front of Harry’s hoodie. He was past any self-inflicted grunt of “Man up”. His tears kept coming thick and fast, his body aching from the fight that he had been part of earlier. He didn’t know why he’d pushed Harry so far, but he hated that he had.
He wanted to run to him, plead Harry to forgive him, promise him that he’ll be a good friend, anything to get Harry back. He wanted to see Harry smile at him again. Just a small smile, an elbow to the side, all those affectionate little nudges that Liam used to receive from the boy. He needed him back, he needed to feel the closeness from Harry. He needed to lose this feeling of complete and utter rejection.
He knew that it was too late for that now. Too much damage had been done, and Harry was far more interested in other people than to even look at someone like Liam now. Their friendship was done. The thought alone made Liam cry even harder into the hoodie. He had thought that Harry was going to be a bigger part of his life. His mind had provided him with images of them both together, Harry smirking a little as his large hands pulled Liam to him, his thumb rubbing soft circles into Liam’s hip.
Those brunette curls could have tickled against his cheek as the boy left kiss after kiss down Liam’s jaw and neck, Liam’s skin bursting into a shiver as he’d feel Harry’s teeth graze against him. The feeling of Harry’s nails digging into his hips as Liam forced him over, his broad body always being the more dominate of the two, especially against Harry’s skinny little torso. He’d litter the boy with kisses and marks, scratches and bites. No one would tug harder at Harry’s hair then Liam would have.
Harry’s little wrists would have felt so weak within his own hands as he pinned them above the boy’s precious head. He’d slowly kiss down his chest, smirking as he left a cheeky lick over the boy’s nipple. He’d travel south, feeling the boy get excited as he’d arch his back a little. The impatient whines that would leave Harry’s soft lips would be a symphony to Liam as he reached where Harry craved attention.
He’d waste no time in pulling his boxers down and quickly dropping the tight grip that he would have had on his wrists so he could show Harry how much he meant to him. How much he craved him, how much he loved the feeling of him. Liam would make every patch of him feel appreciated and needed, wanted, not used.
Harry’s head would slowly fall back, his eyes closing as his soft pink lips formed a small circle. He would feel the boy’s hands as they clutched at what little hair Liam had. His hips would involuntarily buck everytime Liam licked slowly over that certain spot that he’d know back to front, blindfolded. The older boy would pin the younger down by his hips. White knuckles and hip bruises.
Liam would gladly drop to his knees at the click of Harry’s fingers. As dominant as Liam wanted to be, he’d do anything for Harry’s pleasure. He longed to make every bit of the boy feel good, wanted to kiss and touch every patch, fill every inch of him. He would have been as rough or soft as Harry had wanted him to be. He’d have tied the boy’s wrists to the bedpost, teased him until Harry looked at him with teary green eyes, his rasping voice begging for him. His wrists would be paling due to how much he was tugging to try and free himself, to finally find the release that he had craved since Liam would have started all the tentative licks and kisses. Liam would bring him all the way up to the edge, until the boy was finding it hard to even beg in him low, rough breaths before he’d push himself in roughly, mumbling how much of a good boy Harry was to him, as the younger boy trembled beneath him.
Or he would have been soft, slow. His biceps would have been either side of Harry’s head as he delivered slow, but deep kisses to match the thrusts that he would have given him. He’d slow it right down, feeling how the curly haired boy’s back would slip into an arch, their torsos grazing against each other in a hot friction. Harry’s hands would be clutched to his back, the younger boy savouring the feeling of the older boy on top of him, clinging to him like a koala.
He’d quietly say Liam’s name as if a question, tugging at the hem of the boy’s shirt. He’d follow it with a husky chuckle. He’d demand it dominantly. He’d let it fall from his mouth pleadingly. He’d scream it inbetween curses and grunts. He’d yell it two, three times in a row, then once again after that. He’d mouth it, his eyes tightly shut, the pleasure too intense. He’d whisper it in a rough voice. He’d mumble it against his skin.
Those two swollen pink lips would make Liam’s voice seem like a bible sermon, a holy sound, a sound Liam craved to hear.
He’d have held the younger boy tightly, watching him intently as he slowly came down from his cloud nine experience, a forehead full of drops of sweat. His hair would be a rough, tangled mess. The smallest curls at the back of his neck would be stuck to the back of his neck from the sweat that dripped from his precious body, while the others all went whichever way they had been previously pulled in by Liam’s own hand.
His bottom lip would be littered with beautiful bitten speckles. He’d have bitten down on it so much, caused so much damage to it, and Liam’s thumb would slowly run over it, a soft kiss to follow to take any soreness from it away. His mouth would form into a small smile, the corners upturning as he felt Liam’s thumb run over his lip. His lips would form into a small pout as he kissed the boy’s thumb with a cheeky smile. He’d have whispered little nothings to the older boy. He would have whispered how much he loved him, needed him, couldn’t live without him.
The younger boy would promise not to leave him; to never go without promising to come back, to vow for ‘see you later’ over ‘goodbye’.
Liam Payne’s puffy eyes looked over the soft material of the hoodie, sniffling a little as he realised that all of the little images his mind had come up with were as good as done. The images would remain silly, spoilt little daydreams. Things he couldn’t have. Words he’d never hear, touches he’d never feel from the boy. Harry Styles was gone, no matter what the image of him in his head had promised him. He broke into another sob and pushed his face back into the hoodie. The last remaining thing he had of him, if he didn’t come back and rip it from his shaking hands.
His family had returned from the various work and school runs, unknown to Liam. He couldn’t hear anything but his own heavy breathing, if his eyes were open they would have only been blurred with tears. He was just curled up on his bed, his face tucked into the dark green hoodie as he tried to get any of the boy’s scent that he could. He’d ended up crying into his hoodie more than his pillow, and most of the scent of the younger lad was gone.
His bedroom door slowly opened, revealing a blue eyed teenage boy stood by it.
“Li Li?” Niall asked, his small voice quiet as he looked over his older brother’s body, curled up and sobbing into a dark green hoodie. He swore that he’d seen Harry wear that before. His blue eyes looked around in confusion.
His big brother’s wardrobe doors were open and their contents was sprawled all over the floor. His brother’s clothes littered the place, and as Niall looked over the bedroom floor he saw more mess from underneath the clothes. His brother’s schoolbag was thrown against the wall, looking lifeless, it’s contents falling out from it. There were pens and papers from his desk thrown everywhere and Niall immediately was worried. The room was so messy, no wonder Liam was so sad, he hated mess.
The fourteen year old immediately rushed off to his own room, knowing immediately what to do. His own bedroom door flew open as he bounded in, running straight to his bed and grabbing his Cars blanket, gathering it in his arms before he turned and rushed back to his brother’s room. He got as far as the landing before he tripped over a corner of the blanket that had been dragging on the floor. He scooped it back up, on a mission to make his brother happy again.
His feet took him back to Liam’s room, where he carefully stepped over the mess in his room, also tripping over a pair of his brother’s jeans that were loose on the floor, when he reached his brother’s bed. The broken sobs had rocked Liam’s body into a sniffling, yet calming state, the boy half asleep and falling deeper with each long, ragged breath. Niall put the Cars blanket over his brother’s body, tucking it in as well as he could, even though he knew he wasn’t very good. Liam sniffed a little and cuddled into it.
Niall gave a small nod, before he slowly started to tidy up his big brother’s room. He picked up an item of clothing one by one and hanging them back into the wardrobe. It wasn’t as clean and tidy as Liam would have done it, but Niall figured that if he cleaned it up enough it would be better, and then Liam could help and organise it with Niall’s help. He wouldn’t stop until his brother was happy again.
Liam stirred a little before he could fall into a deep sleep, and his eyes slowly opened, encouraging a feeling of soreness from all of the crying. He sniffed a little and brought whatever the warm thing that was covering him over him more. The smell of his baby brother flooded his nose, and his eyes opened fully in confusion.
Before he could question the blanket, his eyes focused onto the form of his brother, walking around the room with arms full of clothes as he tried to stuff them back into the wardrobe.
“Niall,” Liam grunted roughly, his tolerance levels at an all-time high. His baby brother turned around and looked at him, his small smile aimed in his big brother’s direction. The blonde boy was about to start talking when Liam quickly interrupted, his tone gruff and unforgiving.
“What the fuck are you doing in my room?” he spat, remaining curled up on the top of his bed. Niall’s smile dropped, and his arms tensed obviously around the clothes he was holding.
“Y-your room was messy, and you were sad, so I cleaned it, Li Li, I thought it would make you better,” Niall started, looking desperately at his big brother, confused by why Liam was talking to him in such a scary way.
“You’re the last fucking person I want to see! Don’t you get it, Niall? This is your fault! You fucked everything up! Everyone left because of you, you make everyone leave, no one wants to stick around because of you!” Liam spat, slowly sitting up as his voice got continuously louder, his brow etched in a deep frown as he scowled at his younger brother. Niall looked at him with a sad look of confusion.
“B-but I don’t wanna go, Li Li, I’ll be good,” He tried again, but Liam was all but too quick to throw the five words that he had been harbouring for a very long time at the only boy who was incredibly innocent in the situation.
“He left because of you!” Liam yelled, pointing at his baby brother in anger. There was a deadly silence. Liam’s breaths were ragged and uneven, his mind running at a million miles an hour due from all of the stress he was under. Niall’s big blue eyes blinked a few times as they looked up at Liam, the boy swallowing heavily, his poor mind still clouding with confusion.
“Who left, Li Li?” He asked quietly, too confused from what his brother was saying. All he wanted to do was help but now Liam was shouting at him and scowling at him, and saying things that he didn’t understand.
“I said fuck off!” Liam yelled, before he threw the Cars blanket off himself in an attempt to get off the bed and throw Niall out of his room. Niall flinched and burst into a sob, stumbling a little as he backed away. Liam’s big brown eyes watched as the small body of his brother ran from his bedroom. The minute the boy scrambled from his room he stormed to his door and slammed it shut, before slowly sinking down it.
The boy’s heartbeat slowly fell to a normal pace, the blood running through his veins slipping back to what felt like its normal calm stroll. His hands fumbled until they found his face where he rubbed his face with a tired and ragged sigh.
“I’m a fucking mess.” He told himself, his voice rugged from the amount of crying he’d done previously. He let his head go back and rest against the cold wooden door. He could faintly hear his brother’s sobs and mumbles through the wall. He quickly blocked them out and snatched his mobile phone from his pocket, dialling his needed number and putting it to his ear.
The desired voice answered, and greeted him.
“I wanna see you. I need a fuck.” Liam grunted bluntly, not expecting a declined answer.
“Fine, but you better not litter me with hickeys again, grotbag. Be here in ten.” Louis Tomlinson’s silken voice came down the phone.
Liam nodded to himself, before ending the call.
A/N: Hello everyone! Hope you are all well!:) Wasn't this a gritty one, hm? Can't wait for you to see more of the plot..thanks for putting up with the slow updates, and hope you enjoyed that slight Lirry smut.
I did.
Love always <3