Chapter TWENTY SIX
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Kat's POV
He tried to kiss me. Ugh, why must I say no? I could feel my tears as I snuggled into his chest. I was honestly surprised that he still wanted to hold me like this when I'd rejected him. Trust me it's not like I didn't want him to because believe me I did.
I still want that. But I knew that if I let him kiss me that it was a no turn back thing. We couldn't go back to being friends and with the looming question of who was his mate, I couldn't risk. He was too important in my life to let that happen.
Falling asleep was hard but I did it somehow and when I woke in the morning, Colin was gone. I was afraid I might have hurt his feelings because I know that I hurt mine. I didn't see him all day, I just hung out in my room reading and studying for finals. As I was leaving school early to attend College, I had to makeup all the tests and projects which kept me pretty busy.
Colin picked me up for school everyday and we hung out after school most days, until Friday came.
"Mack's coming tonight." He told me as he parked in the school lot, "As prom is tomorrow and everything."
"Right." I nodded, "So we can't hang out?"
"Sorry Kitty, my mom roped me into unpacking her suitcases. Didn't I tell you she's moving in for the summer?"
Shaking my head I looked away from him. "No. You didn't mention that part."
"She thinks that she could be my mate, they're just preparing since my birthday is less than a month away." He told me, opening his door. "Don't worry, I only have to help her tonight, I can be with you the rest of the time."
I walked beside him in silence. Colin and Mackenzie living together for the entire Summer while I was hundreds of miles away? What is this madness? How could their parents approve of this?
My mind was hazy as I moved through the day, like I couldn't quite get the grip on reality. Teegan snapped her fingers in front of me as the bell rang for the end of lunch, "Come on Kat. Gym time." She grinned as she pulled me along with her.
Since I could finally play in dreaded gym I followed her to the locker rooms where I changed. Today we were playing badminton and luckily Teegan was my partner so I didn't have to go through the awkwardness of playing with some random person I don't talk too. Or Colin.
Colin had tried to get my attention all day but I was too Zoned to answer him. I noticed him looking at me as the teacher talked and explained the rules and once the coach was done Colin came up to me.
"Are you okay?" He asked, "You seem kind of out of it today."
"I'm good." I nodded in return and then took the racket that Teegan handed me. "Good luck in the match because you're going down."
He smirked and took the racket that a girl had handed him. I'm guessing she was his partner and I tried hard not to let that bother me. "You're so on." He laughed back at me.
I watched him walk to the other side of the net before turning to Teegan. "Do you know how to play?"
"No idea." She shook her head gnawing on her bottom lip.
"Me either." I agreed. It was a split second of silence before we started laughing. It was hard to imagine high school without Teegan, she was the perfect friend that I've never really had before.
We lost, naturally, but we had more fun than all the other teams so that was something at least. After class I noticed Spencer sitting in the bleachers and I smiled as I walked over to him.
"Shouldn't you be in class?" I asked standing in front of him.
"And miss this?" He gestured to my gym clothes with a smirk, "I don't think so."
"Seriously, what are you doing here?" I laughed, trying to push away the gross feeling in my stomach.
"I know that you usually go home after this hour and Colin's helping Mack move in so I thought I could give you a ride home. Figure out our plans for tomorrow."
I bit my lip and then nodded, I did need to figure out the plan for tomorrow. "Sure, I'll just go change."
"I wish you wouldn't." He smirked again.
Rolling my eyes I walked away, "I'll be right back."
Spencer was still waiting for me five minutes later and he stood so he could meet me halfway. "I need to grab my bag from my locker." I told him and he followed me, chatting the whole way about Sports, something I couldn't get into. At least not with him.
Surprising both of us there were tons of people in the hallway, probably skipping class with only one to go on a Friday. Plus Prom was tomorrow so not much learning was getting done anyway.
I grabbed my bag and Spencer reached for it with a smile. I wasn't going to say no to letting him carry my bag. I returned the smile he was giving me as we walked to his car. Spencer was being nice, nicer than usual and I didn't totally hate it.
We pulled up in front of his house and my grin only widened at the thought of seeing Malia, I'd been so busy with the end of the school year and Colin that I hadn't had time to see her.
"Oh my Gosh!" Malia squealed as I walked into her room, she was lying on the bed reading a book when I walked in which she threw in excitement. "I missed you!"
I wrapped my arms around her and let her hug me. Even though I hated giving hugs, my family and now Colin excluded, I allowed it to happen. I was too happy to see that she's been fine since the last time I'd seen her.
As she laughed I was reminded that I hadn't seen Olivia in a while either. She was like a little sister to me and I was afraid that she might start to like Mackenzie more than me now that they will be living together. Silly and shallow, I know.
Spencer took me home an hour later and followed me into the house, I was prepared for him to just head on downstairs where I could hear the guys but he didn't. He carried my backpack up to my room and sat at Colin's normal spot at the desk. I scrunched my nose at the contrast between the two boys and turned my head away.
"So what time are you getting your hair done tomorrow?" He asked as I unpacked my backpack, throwing books into piles.
"One, I think." I shrugged, "Hannah made the appointment so I'm not sure."
"Cool. Pictures are at Colin's house at two thirty, you'll be done by then, right?"
"Should be." I nodded and then groaned at the thought, "If I'm not done in a hour and a half I'll be disappointed."
He laughed, "And then we have reservations at the italian restaurant an hour away, the one Colin picked at four thirty."
My face flushed at his words, Colin picked the restaurant? This was news to me, maybe this was his favorite place and I never knew. I felt guilty for not knowing what his favorite restaurant was.
"Then we have to back to line up for the grand march by Six forty." He finished.
"Hope we don't hit traffic." I sighed as I felt the whole in my chest growing larger. I'd missed spending the afternoon with Colin, even though he had plans it still stung.
I grabbed my math homework and started doing the problems while Spencer sat watching. Five minutes of that and he sighed loudly to which I looked at him.
"I'm going to go see what the guys are doing. If I do see you before I leave, I'll see you tomorrow."
"Okay." I nodded and he left. As soon as the door clicked shut behind him I reached for my phone and was surprised to see a text from Colin.
Where are you going with Spencer?
I sighed and typed my reply back.
We visited Malia and chatted about tomorrow. How's unpacking?
He didn't text me back right away and I bit down on my bottom lip as I waited for him to answer. He was probably really busy, maybe Mackenzie and him were getting cozy as they unpacked all her things.
It's possible.
That night Colin didn't show up and I resorted to rereading 'Where the Red Fern grows' just to relive our favorite book. I forced myself out of bed around eleven and showered so I was clean enough for the day before I chose a comfortable outfit to get my hair and makeup done in. After that I made my way downstairs.
Hannah was in the kitchen bouncing on her heels as I came in and she rushed me through eating my lunch. "Let's go." She kept saying in my ear.
"Girls are so annoying." Tommy grumbled as he sat at the table doing homework.
Chris nodded in agreeance, "Plus it takes them hours to get ready, I got my tux yesterday and pick up the flowers this morning. Still three hours before pictures but I'm not getting ready until ten minutes before."
"Oh I'm sure Rachel will love that." Hannah rolled her eyes. Rachel was the girl Chris was taking to prom. I know that he really, really wanted to go with his mate but he refused to ask her and as Rachel had asked him, he said yes.
Chris shrugged and I could see the sadness in his eyes. It hurt to know my brother was going through all this pain when I was happier than ever. I had Teegan, Malia and Colin as friends, Shane wasn't going to hurt me, or anyone, anymore and I had gotten into my dream school. I just wished Chris had some sort of happiness.
"Hey I was thinking," I started and they all looked at me as I spoke, "Maybe we could have Lucy over, to get to know-."
"No." Chris snarled. "We're done Kat. She's given me her options and I picked the one I could live with."
"But-."
"But nothing." Chris sighed. "I'm trying hard to move past this so please stop bringing it up."
"Okay." I whispered, shrinking in my seat a little bit.
Silence filled the room and after a few minutes my mother came into the room grinning broadly, "Let's go Kat. Hair time."
I stood quietly and followed my mother out to the car where she drove five minutes to the small town hair dresser, the lobby was full of girls I went to school with and I saw Mackenzie sitting in the chair next to mine.
She smiled when she saw me, clearly recognizing me from pack dinners. "Colin was so helpful last night." She gushed to me and I had to look away from her so she couldn't see the look on my face as she spoke about him. "Olivia also helped set up my room, she's the sweetest little girl."
I nodded, my smile tight as she looked over at me.
Finally after an hour I was done with my hair and makeup. My makeup was natural looking and my hair was curly down my back with it pinned back in a nice way. I was excited to leave Mackenzie's annoying chatter but grimaced when I realized I had to spend the rest of the night with her.
Hannah and my mother helped me into my dress and I was surprised when the doorbell rang five minutes early for Spencer to pick me up since Chris has left to pick up his date already.
"Kat! Spencer's here!" Hannah called up the stairs.
"She'll be down in a minute." My mother called back before grinning at me. "Try to have fun tonight, you'll remember this for the rest of your life. Don't get to caught up in Colin, spend time with your date. Okay?"
I gulped and nodded. She gave me a quick hug and then scurried from my room. I took a deep breath and then descended the stairs. Spencer was staring at me in awe and I smiled at him with my face bright red.
Tommy stood beside him along with Hannah and they were both grinning ear to ear, happiness seemed to be radiating off them. "You look so beautiful." Tommy told me.
"Thanks." I hugged him.
"Remember to dance." Hannah reminded me as she too hugged me. My mother ushered us all out the door as we made our way to the cars. Spencer had rented a stereotypical limo for our whole group while the rest of my family followed behind us in our car.
As we pulled up to Colin's house I noticed everyone from our group standing around, waiting for us. Chris was there with Rachel, Teegan and her date Mitch, Jesse and his date Jen, Colin and Mackenzie and then a bunch of the guys that usually hung around my house were there too.
I couldn't take my eyes from Colin, he was so unbelievable in his tux with his hair slicked back nicely. He was perfection.
Spencer stepped out first and held out his hand to help me from the car. I felt like a princess. My eyes collided with Colin's first and his face was flushed as he stared at me. Spencer brought me to him first, "Doesn't Kat look amazing?" He asked.
I could now feel all the other stares on me and I hated it. All I cared about was Colin's.
Spencer went to take pictures with some friends, leaving Colin and I to talk. "You look...beautiful." He breathed with a shake of his head.
"Thanks." I flushed, "You look amazing in a tux."
He laughed, "You know you're the first one to tell me that."
"Really?" I asked with genuine surprise, I mean his date didn't compliment him? But then I remembered that I hadn't even told Spencer that so I pushed that thought away. Me being a hypocrite.
"Really." He nodded, grinning again. I heard my mother snap a picture and I rolled my eyes to look at her.
"Come on Kat, pictures please." She called.
I groaned and Colin chuckled, "It'll be fun Kitty. You'll see."
We took picture after picture after picture, multiples of Spencer and I, tons of group shots and then a few with my siblings. I got one with Liv and I and then just Teegan. But the pictures I was really looking forward to seeing were the ones with Colin. Just Colin and I.
I had an idea of what I wanted the picture for, my dorm room so I could have him with me wherever. Creepy as I didn't know whether or not he was my mate but I couldn't help it.
I was squished between Colin and Spencer in the limo on our way to the dinner and then both tried to talk to me. I felt bad for not talking to both of them but it just wasn't going to happen.
At the restaurant we had a long table with Colin and Mack sitting across from Spencer and I. They seemed to be in a deep conversation so I took the time to talk with Spencer, who made me laugh with his impressions of the snotty rich people around us.
Soon the dinner was over but I found myself happy as I walked with Spencer to the limo, he was an interesting person and kept me entertained the entire time.
When we walked into the gym, which is where the dance portion of Prom was, it was decorated beautifully with a travel through time theme. So basically it had era's like the 50s, 60s, etc. all around the room. It looked really cool and I hung out in the 50s side because I loved that era the most.
Spencer forced me to dance with him to most songs but I also danced with Colin, a fast paced dance because as soon as a slow dance switched on Mackenzie grabbed Colin and Spencer took me.
I watched Colin and Mackenzie dance with pure envy. He was holding her waist loosely as they swayed to the music and she leaned into him as she placed her head on her chest and I hated the anger that rose in my chest.
The only thing that brought me any reassurance was that we seemed to be watching Spencer and I with the same emotions.
On the last slow dance of the evening I was watching Colin again and he was watching us just as closely. "I had a really great time with you tonight." Spencer's breath blew on my ear and I shivered slightly. A wave of disgust coming over me at the feeling of it.
Turning my head to look at him I was surprised by how close he was. And that's when it happened. Spencer and I stared at eachother for a fraction of a second before he grabbed my face and smushed his lips to mine.
My eyes remained open as I let him kiss me but not kissing him back. He was much too strong to shove off me so I had to wait. I could feel tears prickle my eyes as he kissed me harder, trying to get me to respond.
Finally after an infinity he pulled away and grinned down at me, "Kat. I-." He started to say but I shook my head, my eyes already searching for Colin's. Mackenzie was shoving her way through the crowd after a stiff looking Colin and I ran after him. Guilt filled me immensely as I thought about what happened.
How could I let that happen? My tears were freely running down my face now as I ran outside where Mackenzie was standing watching as Colin walked away. "Colin!" I shouted after him.
"Don't bother." Mackenzie shook her head, "He's mental." She told me before I started running after him. He was really fast at walking and when I rounded the corner I couldn't see him anymore.
"Colin?" I shouted, my voice thick with emotion as I tried to find him. "Colin."
After twenty minutes I was still crying and my guilt had only built the more time that passed. I was disgusted with myself, even though it happened so fast I couldn't really stop it. I found myself walking to the ice rink and decided to give it a try. It was unlocked and the lobby was dark but that meant little. Colin could still be here.
As I looked into the rink through the windows in the lobby I saw him. His face etched in anger and hatred so strong that it scared me but I needed to talk to him. To tell him..
I opened the door but he didn't look up as pucks slammed against the board again and again in his anger. I made my way to the bench and I cried even more. Had I lost him? Was this is? I couldn't believe that he could move past the anger he had, it was so bad and I could hear him growling over the loud smacks.
"Colin." I whispered causing him to freeze while his growls continued. "I didn't.."
"It's fine." His voice was rough and sounded almost animalistic. "He can kiss you and I can't. That's fine."
"Colin, please." I pleaded.
He turned and skated over to me, his growls only becoming louder the closer he came. "Kat. I can't do this.."
"What?" I hesitated as I stepped closer to him, "No. Let me explain."
"What is there to explain?" He hissed, "You let him kiss you and you talked to him all night." He snarled, "You like Spencer."
I shook my head, "I'm sorry Colin. I feel so guilty and disgusted for the kiss but I didn't do anything wrong. He kissed me and I could push him off." I told him trying to get him to see sense. "I'm awful because I want you to kiss me but you can't because you aren't mine. I can't recover from that Colin. I can't move on if you kiss me, that's why I said no."
His eyes soften slightly, "But Spencer.."
"Fuck Spencer." I told him angrily, "I don't care about him, I care about you. Only you."
He stepped closer to me and he hands were shaking as he wiped the tears off my cheeks. I was hit once again with the overwhelming need to kiss him, the feeling only increase as we stared into eachother's eyes.
Why couldn't I kiss him again? I couldn't remember.
"Colin."
"Shhh." He mumbled as he leaned down and I prepared myself for his lips. My eyes closing and my body relaxing into his warmth. His thumb outlined my lips while he cool breath fanned my face and I shivered but in delight this time.
It felt right. More right than anything had ever in my entire life. All I needed to do was close the little space between us and I could feel his lips on mine. All I needed to do was move a fraction of an inch and we'd be kissing.
My cheek tingled in warmth as I remember when his lips had met my skin months ago and every moment from then when we touched. I wanted the tingling sensation on my lips, I wanted it bad.
But could I let him kiss me?