Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
—September 17th, 2017—
Lila grimaced as she pulled up to her shared house with her brother to see a bunch of cars parked. The boys were still over. She loved the boys like they were her brothers but she had a bad day and was hoping she could go to sleep. Even better than going to sleep as soon as she came home, she would've liked to binge movies in the living room and eat ice cream. But they would be loud, so she couldn't do either of those.
She pulled open the storm door and it fell back against her book bag that seemed to be over flowing this point in the semester. She unlocked the door and entered to be greeted with the familiar laughs and voices of the hockey players.
"Hey Lils," Nolan greeted her with a wide smile. It fell when he noticed the frown on her face and he furrowed his eyebrows.
Lila sighed. "Hey guys. I'll be down in a few minutes," she spoke and went upstairs to her room to change. She put on a pair of sweatpants and an old school shirt. At the same time Taylor was about to come up.
"I'll be right back guys, I'm grabbing something to drink," Taylor said from downstairs. The house was set up an interesting way. When you first walk in the kitchen is to your left. Next to the wall that separates the corridor and the kitchen is the first set of stairs. On the right is the living room. When you walk past the stairs there's an office and then the bathroom. A guest room is further down. When you walk all the way down there's a family room with a second set of stairs. The family room connected with the dining room which was connected with the kitchen.
Taylor walked past the kitchen and into the family room to go up the stairs to Lila's room. He walked down the hallway until he reached the door and knocked.
Lila was confused when she heard the knock on the door. She opened it to see Taylor which was a disappointment. She secretly was hoping for Nolan, but she would never admit that out loud.
"Hey Tay," she said with a slight smile and opened the door further so he could come in. Taylor loved how at home Lila's room always felt. Her gray walls made the room simplistic, but the many hockey trophies and medals made up for it. Pictures of her friends back from Canada and pictures of her family littered the walls. The jersey that read "Konecny" with the number seventeen was hung up on the wall with her old sticks in the corner of the room the hadn't been used for at least a year. Travis and her had the same number their entire lives, but now Travis was number eleven. Taylor never understood why Lila had stopped playing hockey, she was always amazing.
Lila on the other hand cursed at herself everyday for not putting the sticks in the back of her closet. She wanted to so bad, but every time she was about to she stopped. It didn't feel right. She couldn't bring herself to do it.
"How was your test?" Taylor asked as he stepped into the room. Lila huffed in annoyance.
"Horrible. Dreadful. Shitty. Every foul word in the dictionary can be used to describe that test. It was multiple choice yet took me two hours to complete it," She said and ran a hand through her curly wavy hair. Taylor hesitated before stepping closer to Lila and putting his hands on her waist.
Lila looked up at him with wide eyes. "Taylor, what're-" she stopped her sentence short – and just in time. He started leaning down and she turned her cheek so his lips didn't meet hers. She wasn't going to let her first kiss be with someone she didn't even have feelings for.
"Lila, isn't it obvious I like you?" He asked and Lila looked everywhere but her eyes. She really didn't know that Taylor liked her.
"No... I just, I never had someone like me like that before. I don't know what it's supposed to be like," She said and shook her head slightly.
There was another knock on the door, followed by the sound of the door opening. Taylor didn't move his hands and Lila looked over at the door to see Nolan.
Nolan felt his heart hammering in his chest as his mouth fell open slightly. "Uh... Travis is looking for you, Lils," He said and Lila removed Taylor's hands from her hips.
She walked past Nolan and down the stairs to the living room, where she was flustered. Travis's eyebrows furrowed at the sight of his sister's very pink cheeks.
"What happened? They didn't walk in on you changing, did they?" He asked and Lila shook her head. She didn't understand why she was so flustered about this. It was only (about to be) her first kiss.
"Uh... no. Taylor just – never mind," she said and now it was time for Ivan to furrow his eyebrows.
"Did he try to kiss you, Lila?" He asked and Lila's silence was an answer to the question without her having to speak. Travis pursed his lips.
Nolan and Taylor were having a glare down in Lila's room. Nolan couldn't believe it, Lila didn't like him! Right? It made no sense.
Lila sat down on the couch next to Ivan. All of the boys that were downstairs heard the discussion between Ivan, Travis and Lila. He put his arm around Lila in a comforting way.
"Did he try to do anything else Lils?" Ivan asked and she shook her head. Luckily all he did was try to kiss her.
"Luckily, no. He just leaned in to kiss me and last second I turned my cheek. I'm just a little flustered, that would've been my first kiss. I wouldn't want it to be like that," she said and he nodded his head.
Nolan came downstairs and saw Travis at the foot. Taylor came down a few seconds later, him trying his best to avoid Travis' icy glare. Nolan nodded at Travis and walked into the living room and sat on the other side of the room as Lila. However Travis stopped Taylor as he tried to walk past him.
"The fuck was that, Leier? You know how she is. Yet you try to pull a stunt on her. You're lucky it wasn't what... what he tried to do," Travis spat out. Taylor had to refrain from rolling his eyes.
"Travis, you know I'm not like that. I wouldn't do that to her, or any woman for that matter," He said and this time Travis rolled his eyes. He knew he would regret what he would do if he stayed so he went back into the living room.
Lila was tucked under Ivan's arm and Travis nodded at Ivan. The only person Travis would willingly let Lila date would be Ivan, but Ivan didn't date and they would never date each other. They were too much like siblings.
Everyone ended up watching Spider Man and Lila fell asleep leaning against Ivan. Nolan tried to fit the feeling of jealousy, he didn't like Lila. He kept telling himself he didn't. He had only just met her.
After the movie ended Ivan picked up Lila who was surprisingly light for her age. He also was a hockey player so he had some strength. He carried her up to her room and laid her on her bed before leaving.
The next day Lila woke up in her bedroom with no recognition on how she got there. She looked in the corner of the room to stare at the hockey sticks that she hadn't touched in two years. She got up and walked over to them, hesitating before picking the four sticks up.
flashback – Lila's Point of View
This was it. I had the puck on my stick and I only had to skate a few yards to score and win nationals for us.
At that point the pain in my knee didn't matter. All that mattered was getting the puck into the back of the net. I skated and skated until I felt my skates being taken out from under me. My right knee collided with the ice and I let out a cry of pain; something wasn't right. I knew my knee pad didn't feel right. I knew I should've said something about the pain in my knee. But I didn't and that was where I went wrong.
I was taken off the ice and into an exam room where I was then rushed to the hospital. A few x days later revealed that I shattered my knee cap and would need multiple surgeries to fix it.
I was told that I could indeed still play hockey, but there would be the chance that if I injured my knee again then I wouldn't be able to play again. So I'd rather choose to not play and still be able to go back to it then the chance of me being told I could never play again.
reality
Lila clutched the sticks in her hands and felt the tears threaten to fall. Her entire future was crushed within a minute. She was guaranteed a spot on the Woman's Olympic team, but she chose to stop playing which revoked her position.
Lila walked over to the closet on the other side of her room and tucked them back behind her shirts. She took a deep breath before closing the door before she changed her mind.
It was done.
The next step would be removing her jersey and trophies but she knew she would never be able to do that. She couldn't.
Lila walked downstairs to see some of the boys had slept over and were crashed in the living room. She went into the kitchen to make herself coffee. Once that was done she went outside and sat down on the porch on the chilly October morning.
A few minutes later she heard the sliding glass door open and she turned to see her brother. She pursed her lips before saying, "It's done. I did it."