Hey guys I'm not dead! (well not on the outside). So, I apologize to you peeps because, of my absence and my lack of updates but, it's cool 'cause I'm here right now. Well, I kinda had a little tragedy because, my friends at school kinda now about my Bipolar Disorder and I got drunk at school because, I couldn't cope with them knowing so, now I have to see the school council/ psychiatrist about my teachers knowing on Monday so, FML. Also my little shithead brother broke the tablet so, I have to come out my hobbit hole (my room) and face the disgusting , ugly monsters , a.k.a MY FAMILY to write for you guys but, I'm happy that you guys enjoy my writing and are supportive. SO without futher a do, back to the Spicy gay boyos....
Tord's P.O.V-
Tom and I had left the church and were now walking towards his house so, he can shower and pack some extra clothes. He was coming over to my house for dinner and a few days because.... IDK . I guess we just love eachother. We walked down the street holding hands and just looking around silently. Tom just gazed forwards, staring at nothing in the distance . He hadn't realized we past his house for the third time. I gave him a worried look before, turning us around to get to Tom's front porch. "You okay, babe.", I asked as I forced him to look at him. He shook his head no and then looked down.
I know he felt devastated for his friend but, I don't want Thomas to feel any pain. He was all cried out and had bags under his eyes and his spikey , soft brown hair seemed to slump down instead, of normally perking up.I sighed and pulled him into a quick hug and kissed him on his forehead before, knocking on his front door. I then looked back at my boyfriend.
A few seconds later , we could hear the door locks unlatching and the door slowly creak open. I have met Tom's parents before and still everytime I see them , I am still shocked. We looked down at a shiny , deep purple bowling bowl with a set of beautiful pearls around her neck. I stared at it for a few seconds in silence , Tom also stared but he looked like he was listening. He gave a small smile and just out of nowhere said "Hi Mom, I told you I was at Edd's church , remember. " I gave him a questionable look. The bowling ball rolled to the side by itself , as if saying "come in." I took a seat on the white sofa in the living room.
"Mom, you remember Tord, right? ", Tom said gesturing towards me .
Silence.
"Yes, I'm still gay , Mom. It isn't a phase.", Tom sassed placing his hands on his hip.
Silence invaded once again.
"Mom, I love Tord and Tord loves me .", Tom crossed his arms and glared at the bowling ball.
The quiet came again as the bowling ball replied in a tone inaudible to my ears, this time a little longer.
Tom scoffed. "Mom, I never had any interest in that Coconut from down the road. I only went to the sixth grade prom with her because, you guys forced me to. She's ugly , and too hairy . She wouldn't shave at all!", Tom huffed.
I just looked on confused as more silence filled the air.
Tom looked like tears were forming in his sockets. "WHATEVER, MOM. I'M NOT EVEN GOING TO BE IN YOUR DUMB HOUSE FOR A FEW DAYS. I'M GOING BY TORD !", Tom yelled. And with that he stormed to the bathroom , slammed the bathroom door and turned the shower on, leaving me with his mother.
She turned to me and just stared. OMGOMGTHISISFUCKINGWEIRDWHATTYPEOFANTICHRISTDEMONICSHITISHAPPENINGINTHISHOU-
"H-HI", I sheepishly waved. Sweat drained down my face as the hard ball glared at me. It stood there for a moment and rolled to the kitchen , out of my sight. I let out a sigh of relief and relaxed my tense shoulders. I snuggled into the back of the couch with my eyes . I couldn't relax all the way because , I felt as if I was being watched. I didn't mind it until it felt as if someone was staring at me with such a height of intensity. I popped my eyes open and shot up. I looked around the blandly decorated room until I saw a pineapple staring at me from the top of the staircase. I flinched at the odd fruit's presence. Was he always there? I stared for a moment before, turning my gaze to the bathroom Tom was in "Uh... Tom can you hurry up, please.", I asked in a scared tone . "Yea , I'm just drying my hair.", he replied. I turned back to the stair case.
Where the fuck did he go? I searched the room and let out a small gasp. The pineapple was now on the couch on the other side of the room. I didn't even see him move! He had on a pair of spectacles and a collar with a brown tie, How I DON'T KNOW !?!. I suddenly, straightened up and placed my sweaty palms in my lap with my ankles crossed. "H-hello, Sir?!?", I greeted nervously. My accent came out hard and thick because, I was scared out of my wits. Tom then came out of the bathroom and I directed my attention to him. He was wearing a white fluffy , towel , which was almost the same color. All of his scars and numerous hickeys were exposed and his mellow brown hair was poofy and covered his eyes. AWW..
"Dad , you better not be out here threatening Tord with that", Tom sternly scolded. He had one hand on his towel to keep it from dropping and a finger pointing to the seat next to me. But I thought the pineapple was on the next sofa. I swiftly looked to the side of me to see the creepy pineapple with a HUGE butcher knife close to him. "GAH !", I screamed and jumped off the couch like Ringo did when he was startled. "Tord, come in the room with me.", Tom demanded. "Oh thank God!", I breathed out . "Uh -uh ! Thank Jehovah", Tom wiggled his finger in front of my face playfully. I just rolled my eyes and followed him to his room.
After , Tom was dressed and groomed, I decided to help him pack. We places a ska designed suitcase on his bed and started to put items in it. 5 blue jackets : 1 motorcycle, 1 turtleneck sweater, 1 leather jacket, 1 bomber jacket and 1 royal blue fancy blazer (His hoodie was tied around his waist.), 10 shirts with a mix of blues and greys, with an exception of a checkered T- shirt and a white dress shirt with a ska themed tie , numerous black bottoms contrasting of leggings , swim trunks , shorts, jeans and underwear, a few bottles of Smirnoff ,a load of chokers, rings and bracelets and Susan. I looked down at the suitcase.
It looked like the definition of depression with all the blues, greys and black swirling around. "Geez, Tom. Don't you have any cheerful colors.", I questioned. "Oh..", Tom yipped out and turned to one of his drawers. He then pulled out a cute , tye- dye , V- neck shirt with the words 'kitten shopping' on it and threw it in the bag. I just glared at him. "What?", he asked innocently. I rolled my eyes and started to walk towards the front door.
Both of Tom's parents were there and was standing in front of the door. I shuddered. Tom handed me his suitcase and bent down and picked up his mom. "Bye , Mom", he chirped and gave it a quick kiss . He then scoffed at his father and rolled his eyes. "Goodbye, Asshole", Tom insulted and grabbed my hand and ran out the door. When we touched the sidewalk, I swore I heard a calm and caring feminine voice say "Goodbye, dear." and a hard, deep, gruff voice shout "What DID HE CALL ME?!?" , in an angered voice. I looked back at the house but , the front door was already closed. Tom just snickered as I tried to comprehend what just happened.
Tommy's POV -
I giggled like a schoolgirl and skipped up the road. I absolutely adore the Larsin's residence . Tord thinks I don't know but, I know that his family are like secret spies or some shit .I mean they have buttons and levers all over the house and there's always a secret. Plus, his parents are one of the very few married gay couples in the town. I slowed down when I saw Tord's house in sight so, he could catch up. He slowly trudged along with my suitcase." Why are you so , happy?", he asked with a faint smile. "Cause, I'm going to my future husband's house for a few days, duh ~", I sassed back. He blushed pink because, of the future husband thing.
Tord brushed that off handed me my suitcase so, he could ring the doorbell . I just swayed about like a child while looking at my lover. Tord's 5'9 and has that muscular skinny build. He has tanned skin the same shade as peaches since , his ethnicity. His horns curl back and he has his hair in a cute , man bun in the back held together with red rubber bands. We both have matching piercings on our right ear and he has this tattoo with the Communism logo on his shoulder which, he thinks I don't know what it is about. AND GAWD... don't get me started on those grey pretty eyes. They remind me of a storm and all his depressed thoughts.
I smiled as he hummed along with doorbell , which sang the tune of the Communist Propaganda (Tune up above), which is a pretty good tune I must admit. A little after, a tall , lanky polish man with messy hair answered the door. He was wearing an apron that read "World's Okayest Cook". "Hi, Dad", Tord greeted and tippy toed to give the man a kiss on the cheek . He then, walked upstairs to put the suitcase in his room. Before, I could say anything, the man pulled me into a bear hug. "Thomas, it's so nice to see you,darling.", he chirped and gave my forehead a peck. I returned the hug . "It's nice to see you too, Pat !", I replied. He pulled me inside and shut the front door.
"Thomas, honey. I need you to help Pay in the kitchen with dessert. Watch him !", he added before heading in the direction of Pau's study. "Yes, sir", I giggled and headed towards the kitchen. I saw Pay in a black apron which read "Kitchen Bitch" , covered with chocolate frosting dancing to a song on the radio. Of course it's vulgar...
"Wow...", I said trying to get his attention. When he acknowledged me he gave me a tight hug ."Tommo, my boy. How's it hanging ?", he asked smiling widely. "Life's good", I replied but , quickly frowned."What happened to your face?", I asked pointing to a band- aid under his left eye. "I got into a fight at the bar", he chuckled nervously. I could tell he was uncomfortable. "But, hey now you can tell me and Pat apart , right.", He reassured . "Yea ", I chorckled. I leaned in close to his ear and whispered , "I got a few bottles of Vodka in my bag for later." His face immediately lit up. "You sneaky boy", he mocked. We laughed for a few seconds. "Oh yea , Pat told me to help you with desert .", I reminded him. "Oh , I think I have an extra apron, hold on" and with that he dashed out the kitchen.
I sat there looking at a large circular chocolate cake that had chocolate icing covering about a 1/4 of it. Pay zoomed back with an apron that read "Hot Stuff Coming Through". I blushed but, put it on anyway and started helping Pay with the cake , cracking a few jokes here and there.
After a long 15 minutes, the cake was done and both me and Pay were covered with icing and sprinkles. Tord walked into the kitchen and blushed at what the apron said. I laughed my head off at how easy it was for blood to rush to his cheeks. He didn't like that one bit so, he grabbed me by my waist and playfully lick some icing off my cheek , causing mine to burn a brighter red. Both Tord and Pay died of laughter and I sat there grumbling to myself.
Pat had already placed the food out on the table along with the cake. Pat sat next to Paul , who sat next to Tord, who was saving a seat for me which, was next to Pay who sat next to Pat. I washed my hands and took off my apron and exposed my grey shirt which read "Stay Safe" and headed to the table. But, before I sat down , I untied my blue hoodie from around my waist revealing my tight denim jeans that showed all my curves.
Pay then spat out mash potatoes. "Dang Tord, kjæresten din er tykk. (Dang Tord, your boyfriend is thick." ), Pay said in bewilderment.
"Faen , Pay ! ikke antar å se deg der ! ( Fuck, Pay . Your not suppose to be looking there.), Tord snapped back.
I held in my laugh and acted like I didn't know what they were saying. "Tord, språk !" (Tord, language !), Pat butted in.
"Beklager, pappa" (Sorry , dad), Tord apologized in a sad tone for being scolded.
"Det er greit, sønn" (it's okay son.) Paul reassured him while , gnawing on some chicken.
"Ja, hvor mange ganger slår du det" (Yeah, how many times you hit that), Pay teased. He had this shit eating grin on his face.
"~Mange ganger faktisk ~" (Numerous times actually), I added in with a smirk.
The whole table gasped because , of the comment I made and because, I understood their language. Pay guffawed as Tord turned a High red and buried his face in his hands. Pau chocked on his peas and carrots and Pat was just frozen. He unfroze, when he heard Pay drop to the floor wheezing. "When did yo learn Norwegian, Tom.", he finally asked. I could tell he was shocked because, he never refers to me as Tom, always Thomas or some pet name . "I've been dating Tord for years now and I picked up a little from him and decided to learn the rest on my own", I stated proudly.
"That's... Good", Pat hesitated as Pay got up. Pau then cleared his throat for everyone's attention. The slightly hefty man cocked one of his bushy brows up and said in a stern voice, "I hope we used protection because, we wouldn't want any babies . Right, Thomas". I started to sweat but, before I can answer Tord already had interrupted . "Oh my gosh , FATHER ! I know I am adopted so, stop telling me I came from Pat's butthole and besides , I know how sex works. Pats face flushed and Pau's eyebrows furrowed.
"Who told you about that ?", Pau asked gruffly. "Well, school and I guess , Uncle pay", Tord listed. Everyone dragged their attention to Pay who was sheepishly smiling. "Whaaaat? Doesn't he watch Animal Planet. ", Pay tried to defend himself. Pat just face palmed himself and Pau started grumbling about "Disfunctional families".
~ Time skip brought to you by Edd's Dad, Phillip because , to much Homos in this chapter.~
Tord had to lift me upstairs because, I was drunk. How? Well, me and Pay might have accidently on purpose spike the Kool- Aid , Pau made .
WHOOPS.
I giggled with each step Tord took because, I would bounce and say "WEEEE!", the whole time. As we made our way through the hall , I started to give Tord kisses everywhere, leaving rings of saliva all over his face , even his eye. I could tell he was a tad , bit angry with me but, I didn't care because,... I'M DRUNK!. He threw me down on his queen , size bed . It had a wooden frame and blood red sheets on it . "So, soft.. ", I muttered. Even though, I had been in his room a thousand times , I started looking around the place because, .... I'M DRUNK.
His room walls were a cherry red color , trimmed with white. They held posters of Manga chicks, Rock bands and horror movies . On the left of the room, is a bookshelf filled with books but, if you press a button on the lamp on his nightstand , it transforms into a Storage space for weapons . Opposite the bed , is a huge T.V which, can be used as a government computer and it has several beanbag chairs in front of it . On the next side of the bed was a closet , which is actually a portal to the underground of the house. I love snooping around in my boyfriend's room.
Tord then, started to undress me . I didn't expect that. He was doing it as quickly as possible but, I decided to squirm and protest , just for fun . "Tom!", Tord barked. "~Ooh, someone's needy~", I flirted . Tord rolled his eyes and walked over to my suitcase and his draw and pulled out our pajamas. After seeing , that I was being difficult, Tord started to strip instead. "Oh, you're treating me tonight , huh", I asked seductively. Tord just rolled his eyes in response and started to put on his Black pajama shirt. "BAAAABBBBBEE, what are you doing ?", I whined drunkly. "Don't you wanna fuck me ?"I started to pull on his red , sweat pants.
He then , slipped my clothes off and got on top of me. " ~Oh, so you do want to get freaky. ", I playfully teased. I tilted my head back so, Tod could start biting it. He gave me soft kisses on my jaw line and a few playful bites on my neck , forcing me to shiver. I closed my eyes and let sweet bliss take over. I felt him pin my hands above my head , with one hand as he bit down on my shoulder, H A R D. I let out a very audible moan, but before I could finish my noises , Tord had already put my sleep wear on and had forced some water in my mouth. I coughed and sputtered. "W-what the hell man.", I asked after I caught myself.
"Tom , your drunk. Drink. NOW.", he demanded in a firm tone of voice. That sent shivers down my spine and I swiftly took the bottle from him. After, I had drained the bottle from all of it's content. Tord layed down next to me and turned off the light, leaving the moonlight peering through his window as the only light source. It was silent until I broke the silence....
"Tord..."
"Hmmm..."
" Can you turn on the light , please"
'Why"
"I have to get my bear and I have to pee."
Phillip's POV-
Edna and I were at the police station informing the police officers about out troubles."Please, you have to help us ", Edna frantically screamed. "Woah , Folks calm down . What's the fuss ?", A buff cop in his middle age asked us. He held up his hands , chest level to tell us to slow down. "Well, my son is mis- "
"HEY! I'm not speaking to you. I'm talking to the pretty lady.", he barked. He gave my wife a wink and a perfect smile. His teeth actually sparkled . I bet they're dentures. Before, I could react, Edna had already stated to speak. " Oh , please , Mr. Officer . My adorable , baby boy has went missing . He was kidnapped." , Edna yelled. The officer let out an obviously fake gasp.
THAT LITTLE SHIT...
"Kidnapped.", he repeated like an idiot. "Don't you worry ma'am .", the buffoon started. He then pulled out, these black shades out of nowhere and stood in a dramatic, manly stance. "Chief Wilson, will bring you back your son , safe and sound. I scoffed and crossed my arms , like a teenage girl.
He then took Edna's hand and kissed it. Edna blushed and simply stated "Oh my..." I was furious at the gesture and ripped Edna away from this.... this.. HOMEWRECKER.
"Oi! What's your problem ?", the cop asked , obviously annoyed. " YOU are my problem.", I replied back. He just rolled his eyes and looked towards Edna with an evil grin.
"Hey, sweet cheeks.." , he catcalled. "Would you rather me , a real cop, or a wannabe , with the same girth as the rings around Jupiter, here ?", he gestured me .
Out of instinct , I balled my fist and swung hard at the scumbag's face. I knocked him to the ground , forcing his dentures out his mouth and smashed his shades.
"PHIL !",Edna scolded. She rushed over to the fallen man to see if he was alright. Everyone in the station stared at me and I looked down at my hands. Did I do that ?
"Why'd you do that , Phil", Edna quized me as she helped the poor guy up, ' H- he was flirting with you and I j- " I stammered but was cut off. " Great , our one last hope of finding our son and you done goofed it up. I bet , the chief doesn't even want to help us anymore.", she lectured. Tears threatening to fall . Her voice cracked in some places just like my heart.
"Don't worry, Pretty missy. I'll still help you..." , The douche bag injected, "Oh ... thank you.", Edna replied with a smile. She threw herself onto the cop and hugged him, her face buried in his chest . He just gave me a shit eating grin to say, ' I won this round' , as I glared at him.
Oh he is so , fucked.
Edd's POV-
After getting caught and narrowly escaping the grip of my father, Matt and I still had plenty adrenaline left and were now laying on top of the roof, with the all 227 bats beside us. We just peacefully sat there staring at the moon and having small talk. The bat's were all around Matt. In his hair, in his clothing, on his shoulders, in between his cape, in his lap just snuggled there .
"You're mother seems lovely but, your father looks like he sucks harder than me,"he simply stated. I giggled at his little joke. "Yea, he can be a major pain in the ass." , I replied. I could've sworn I heard Matt say ,"I can be a pain in the ass , too . ", but just brushed that off. "So... What were your parent's like." , I asked , trying to bend conversation (sorry for my Caribbean slang) .
"Well, my Mum died , after she had my little sister because , she had some sort of disease. I was eight at the time but , I do remember what she was like. She had long , ginger locks that would touch her waist and her face was littered with freckles . She had green beautiful ,eyes just like mine but, full of life and her lips were also this beautiful shade of blood red. She was the daughter of a wealthy merchant , which added to our wealth and was the only wealthy , girl who knew anything about home economics and art. She painted some of those , pictures in the parlor. I remember , when they told me she was... gone , I bawled my eyes out for days but, found a new joy because, my sister looked and acted exactly like her. Matt sighed. His eyes were glossy.
I put a hand on his shoulder, disturbing a few bats with a reassuring smile. He smiled back and continued.
"My dad was a prince at the time and married my Mum because, she was peculiar and unique. They would spent the days waltzing about the castle and sneaking out the castle to go in these very forest. Dad liked it so much, he built this house, around the time I was born for Mum and I , when palace life got stressful. "
"So, this is kinda like a safe haven , huh.", I interrupted.
"Yup. When Mum died , Dad went into a huge state of depression and ended up neglecting his duties . The dukes and other royal staff decided that the king had served his time and gave the throne to his cousin , Marco. He lived a double - life as a bandit and led the kingdom almost to poverty until Queen Victoria and her men stopped her. Meanwhile, I was married to that piggish brat I told you about."he grumbled.
" Aww, poor baby..", I teased.
Matt's face turned a grey tint instead of red , because his blood is poisoned black.
"Hey, Matty ."
"Yes, Cola Boy.."
" I am real sorry, all your pride and joy is gone."
" It's okay , I found a brand new joy.'
"And what's that?"
" You ~"
Along ass chapter for my long ass absence. Please comment , loves.