"Something is definitely wrong with you."
I looked at Morgan apprehensively, as she said to me what I already told myself after Bobby's party a week prior; our topic of conversation, actually.
"I thought it would be a good idea, inviting Meg. I didn't know she would say what she did."
Morgan gave me an apprehensive glare, trying to hide a smirk but failing.
"Look," I said , trying to avoid her piercing gaze, "can't we just keep looking and not talk about it? It happened, it's over. I need an outfit!"
We continued our walk through H&M, looking for an outfit I could wear to the game prior to the homecoming dance. It had been a week, and I was still reeling. I had never gone to a school dance before, let alone with a hotshot football boyfriend that everyone would be watching. It frayed my nerves, actually. Naturally, I wanted options as far as outfits to calm my nerves.
We stopped at a rack full of simple, short-sleeved shirts. Morgan turned to face me, her warm brown eyes feeling a little cold on my skin. "I know her words were a little out of line," she muttered, her comforting voice at an odd contrast with her grimace, "but you should have told Bobby first. That is his ex. There's a history, too. It's dangerous. Especially for you."
I looked back at her, still on guard. She had a point, but I was still trying to let it go back to the past where it belonged. There was no ill will, so I didn't like dwelling on it.
"I know, I know, but I'm not trying to worry about it anymore," I responded, escaping her gaze by looking through the shirt rack.
I could see her shake her head in my periphery, an exasperated sigh leaving her lips. She began to file through the racks as well.
I was admiring the array of long-sleeved shirts when the feel of human hands on my shoulders made me jump in place. I turned to see Bobby, wide-eyed and grinning, with Murphy right behind him.
"Hey, Bobby," I said with a smile, "Hey, Murphy. You scared me, I didn't know you'd be here."
As Bobby's hands circled around me, Morgan said, "What's up, Bobby?" Morgan and Bobby didn't exactly know each other, but mutual friends made it hard for them not to interact. Morgan didn't want to go to his birthday party just because she didn't know him. I had the feeling, though, that it was because she didn't really like him. "I'd rather go to yours and deal with him there," she had said.
He smiled widely and told her, "Not much, just surprising my boyfriend."
I turned to look up at him. "Surprised, definitely." I grinned widely, tracing my fingers lightly over the skin of his forearms, which were now tight around my body.
His smile grew a little mischievous as he said, "Well, though I know I'm a pleasant surprise–" I cut him off by elbowing him in the stomach playfully, which was becoming a thing of ours.
"Sorry, sorry," he laughed. He knew I had taken on the responsibility of making sure his blatant cockiness was in check.
"Though I know you're surprised," he continued, a tinge of annoyance in his voice, "I actually have another surprise in mind."
"Oh?" I made a sound of excitement similar to that of a choking fish, "Where to?"
"Somewhere."
I sighed, looking back at Morgan, then turning back around to face Bobby. "What about shopping? I haven't picked an outfit yet."
Murphy clears his throat, glad he had a chance to speak after minutes of silence, "That's why I'm here. I'll be picking your outfit and taking it back to your house while you two are off...canoodling." The distaste he had in using that word oozed out of his mouth rather noticeably.
Morgan stepped in, almost angrily, "No offense, Super Jock, but I doubt you know a single thing about fashion, let alone the fashion of my friend here. I don't mind you helping, but I'll take over that part."
Both Bobby and I started to withhold laughs from leaving our lips: mine over Morgan's fierce response, and his over Murphy's stunned face afterwards. Murphy simply looked back at Bobby as we tried our best to stop chuckling, then blinked in astonishment. Morgan, who was a solid foot shorter than Murphy, still looked more authoritative than ever with her hands on her hips and pursed lips.
"Okay," he said simply, then moved to her flank, almost like a soldier in boot camp.
Bobby and I managed to both suppress our chuckles, and I asked afterwards, "What's the surprise?"
"The whole point of a surprise is me not telling you."
I could feel my eyes roll before I realized I was doing it. I responded with, "Okay, lead the way, darling," before grabbing his hand and heading for the door, lugging him behind. I turned to the other two and waved goodbye before we left the store and rushed to his truck.
*****
We were driving again. The long road to the middle of nowhere, which ironically became our somewhere. The sun had already set on the horizon by the time we reached the endless hills we had driven to the last time. This time, though, I didn't question him. I stayed silent, knowing not only where we were going, but how happy it would make me.
This time, though, we had more than just a pillow and a blanket. Bobby brought a whole picnic, with sandwiches, fruit, and sparkling cider. He was such a cheesy romantic.
We picnicked under the stars for a while, mostly in silence. We really enjoyed each other's company; so much in fact that sometimes words were just useless. The amazing view of the stars left me breathless, anyway, so talking was hard to do.
A few moments after we stopped eating, however, Bobby finally spoke up, "Stand up, Caleb."
I tore my eyes away from the stars to look at him; his excited eyes and wide smile were good reasons for me to follow his directions. I stood, watching as he, too, got up.
His hands found mine in an instant, gently grasping my fingers in calm admiration. He took a deep breath and spoke, "I hope you know everything that I am about to say to you. I hope that nothing I say right now is new to you. I'm gonna say it, though, because I need to. You are my world, Caleb. You are my everything. You are my every want and my every need. I want you like a child wants candy, and I need you like the flowers need rain."
His hands moved to my face, making the tears welling up in my eyes spill over from movement, both physically and emotionally. His eyes gazed intently into mine, raw love and power being blasted through them into mine. My soul could feel his love, his passion. It almost hurt. He brought new meaning to loving someone to death.
"You are my universe. You are the sun that I revolve around, and every star that I gaze upon."
I chuckled at the irony of the phrase, only making more tears leave my eyes.
"I know you've had certain doubt about my commitment to this relationship. So, to prove to you just how important you are to me, I got you something."
After that, he left me to go back to his truck. He came back with a piece of paper.
He didn't hand me the paper, but rather held it in his hand as he turned me around towards the sky.
"Look at the stars. Find Orion."
I looked up and found the familiar row of three stars, the cosmic belt that Orion's constellation wore every night My favorite constellation.
"I found it," I said immediately after identifying it.
He held the paper in front of my face. There was a map of the sky depicting each and every constellation. On it, I found Orion out of assumption, and saw something strange. A red circle printed onto the paper was around a cluster of stars, about four or five, directly to the left of Orion. The peculiar cluster was strangely shaped, and resembled a heart if observed in a certain way.
"What's that?" I asked, pointing at the strange cluster after I had found it in the actual sky. After seeing it in the sky, it was a definite that yes, it looked a lot like a deformed heart. In my eyes.
"It's yours."
The words didn't compute. I turned to look at him, sure I looked stupid as hell with a very confused look on my face.
"What do you mean?" I asked him, genuinely confused.
He smiled warmly as he said in a tone that was music to my ears, "I had some money put aside, and I bought you a few stars."
My shock was in complete conflict with the utter joy that surged through my body. I could barely think, let alone respond.
He bought me a constellation?
I hugged him before thinking anything else. His arms wrapped around me, sending the familiar warmth of comfort and importance through my bones instantly.
I had a new favorite constellation.
While in his arms, I managed to breathe, "Why?"
His chuckle shook my entire body with pleasant vibrations. "I thought," his voice rang in my ears in an almost-whisper, "that I had explained all of that before."
He let go of me long enough to turn me around, making us look at the stars again. His chin was placed on my shoulder before he continued, "Every time we come out here, you're always mesmerized by the sky. And not to be corny or anything, but I can't help but be mesmerized by you every time. So now, every time I look at the sky, with or without you, I can be reminded of your passion for the stars, and my passion for you."
His lips placed a soft kiss upon my cheek, taking the silent tear away with it.
*****
When we had gotten home later that night (or rather, early the next morning), Bobby and I slept in my bed for the first time since he had began to stay with us. We didn't do anything but lay and allow our breathing to match in rhythm, looking out the window. We couldn't see the stars in the light-polluted L.A. sky, but we both knew it was there. Just like I couldn't see his face, but I knew he was awake, looking at me.
I sighed deeply, trying to contain the joy that attempted to burst out of my chest. The constellation, homecoming, the feeling of Bobby's arms around me; all of it overwhelmed me with optimism. Was it something to hope to keep? Or was this feeling the exact thing that Megan was worried about: the feeling of not wanting his arms to leave mine, or not wanting to leave the bed at all?
Was I really too in love? Could it be possible?
I didn't want to think about it. So I focused on the sound of Bobby's breathing again, matching my rhythm with his once again.
I began to drift off until I felt Bobby's whisper against my ear, "You still awake?"
"Mhm," I responded, trying not to make too much noise.
"Would you be mad if I rented a hotel room for homecoming night?"
"Yes," I said without hesitation.
"Not for that," he quietly chuckled, "To just get away, binge watch movies, enjoy each other's company. I want the whole night to be ours, not just the dance."
I hesitated then, not wanting to say yes but also hating the idea of saying no.
Finally I said, "Yeah, that sounds fun."
I could already tell his mischievous smirk was making an appearance upon its face. I didn't have to see to know.
"Those are the only things we will be doing. Nothing else," I said with mock force, eliciting a chuckle from him.
"No cuddling?" Bobby suggested, his smirk evident in his voice.
"Don't get smart."
We both laughed as quietly as possible, then settled back into synchronized breathing.
Before that night, I would've been terrified of being in a hotel room with him all night. The mere concept would've driven me up a wall. Before the stars, I would've denied it; after the stars, I knew that there was nothing else I wanted.