My life sucks.
.
.
.
As I looked in my right, I saw Lana and she was looking at me sweetly, just like we were best friends for a long time, but I knew that the smile was a facade.
She leaned closer to me and got close to my ear and put her hand around her mouth to muffle most of the sound from the outsiders.
"Don't you dare say a word or you're gonna get killed slowly and painfully. And I assure you. It will hurt like a bitch. "She said and Ryan leaned in close to my other ear and whispered too. But his words were far more painful than Lana's. "Even if we did, no one will miss that fat ass of yours anyway so we would get away with it too." He finished with a smirk.
His words hurt. Like a bitch. And thinking back at my bet with Am, I most probably won't be coming back after tomorrow. I'm not sure anyone would notice my absence at all so... What could a little back talk do?
I turned to Lana with my face scrunched up in anger and whispered back to her, just the way she did.
"Hurt like a bitch? Sorry. I won't ever feel like you do, my dear pack mate. And don't worry I might get ahead of you on that threat." I finished with a wink and turned to my brother Ryan "And don't worry. I knew that already. Who would miss such a 'fat ass', right? My own brother loathes me so, I have no hope, do I?" The anger was gone from my voice and it was coated in sadness.
His face fell and he opened his mouth to say something but Lana cut him off.
"Are you threatening me?!"she said in a whisper-yell, drawing spectators.
I was confused at first , but then I realized what she was talking about. She thought I threatened her to 'kill her slowly and painfully', not what I actually meant.
"No. Lana, I didn't threaten you, I just told you that I would do 'the deed' you were about to do to me myself. " she was confused at first, but a look of horror crossed her features, then she glanced across the table at Leonardo, soon-to-be-Alpha, to see if he was listening in, I suppose for for help of some sort.
And guess what, he was listening in and was looking with wide eyes and gawking in our direction, as if he didn't believe his ears.
I smiled at him warily and raised from my seat, nodding in acknowledgement at Lana and Ryan, then left for the kitchen.
What did he expect? Me to just endure everything they do to me without being damaged at all? To not have actual feelings and be ok with everything going on in this house? Foolish boy...
I entered the kitchen and went to the window, opening it and jumping through it.
I couldn't take it anymore. I needed some air and time to myself. I started snapping and talking back and that isn't good. I'm lucky that we have quests because if we didn't have to keep up with the apparences, I'd be either dead or half-dead. Depends on what they feel like.
I got out and sat in the tree house I built with my brother and father when I was little and all this shit wasn't going on.
I had such a beautiful childhood, but too bad it's over, right?
I leaned my back on the wood wall and let my silent hot tears slide down my cheeks, sobbing lightly.
Why did I have to have such a complicated life? Couldn't I just be the happy carefree bubbly girl I was years ago? I was so happy then, but what happened? The pack happened. Ryan happened. Leonardo happened.
Why did I get such a mate ? A mate that hates me and enjoys making me suffer.
And he doesn't know he's my mate. But that's good. I don't think I can handle a rejection too right now.
I leaned my head against the wooden wall and dozed off, feeling tired after i cried it out.