Lancelot found Merlin splashing water from the lake on his face. Lancelot purposefully walked loudly enough that Merlin turned around and saw him. He relaxed at the sight of his friend. Lancelot sat beside him and was silent. He let Merlin talk when he wanted to.
"Gaius is - was - everything to me. He was like a father. I've watched him die before. I didn't think about the fact that I'd have to again."
"Gaius was an old man," Lancelot said. "I know that doesn't make it better, but - "
"It makes it worse," Merlin said. "It means that he died for nothing. He didn't die a noble, brave death; he was an old man who refused treatment for his ailments." Lancelot looked at Merlin sympathetically.
"He accomplished so much in his life," Lancelot assured Merlin. "He helped so many people. His death may have been pointless, but his life wasn't."
"Thank you, Lancelot," said Merlin gratefully. "You are a good friend. You always were." Lancelot smiled humbly, and Merlin continued. "You're probably my best friend."
"I don't think so!" laughed Lancelot. "Arthur's a better man than me."
"No. It's not fair to compare you two. Arthur has a place in my heart forever. Our souls are tied in destiny. But remember what Kilgarrah said? You are the bravest and most noble knight of all. It is hard to compare my dearest friends, but you were certainly the one I trusted the most. You knew of my magic from the beginning. So, thank you."
"You're welcome?" said Lancelot hesitantly. Merlin cleared his throat and stood up. The time for grieving was past.
"We need to be friends," he said with certainty. "All of us. We can't bring back Albion if we hate each other."
"About that," started Lancelot. "Morgau- "
"What has she done," snapped Merlin. "I knew it! I knew it was a mistake to - "
"Merlin! What she did is not a bad thing. She suggested that we give Gaius a funeral on the lake. With that," he said, gesturing to the moored boat. Merlin looked very surprised.
"That is a good idea. It will symbolize the return of Albion."
"No, don't say that!" Lancelot said. "The return of Albion is death? That's such a morbid thought."
"Sorry," said Merlin. He sighed. "And yet, it is true. There is nothing like a tragic death to either bring people together or tear them apart. Gaius did not die in vain. In his name, we will return Albion."
0O0O0O0
"Arthur?" asked Percival from the doorway, waking the king. He hadn't even realized he had fallen asleep. Morgana stirred in Arthur's lap and he could feel her waking up. She raised her head and sat up straight. She noticed Percival in the doorway.
"Hello Percival," Arthur said. "What is it?" Percival had some difficulty answering.
"We're going to - I mean, we thought - Morgause thought, actually - "
"Out with it!" Morgana commanded. He glanced at her in surprise, but obeyed.
"We're going to burn Gaius in the boat on the lake," he let out in one breath. Arthur smiled slightly.
"That's fitting," he said. He stood up and offered Morgana a hand. She accepted silently. "What is it?" Arthur asked. She looked at Percival.
"Morgause had this idea?" she asked gently, trying to make up for snapping earlier. He seemed to understand her tone, and responded in a kind voice.
"She has been surprisingly helpful," he said. Morgana smiled at him gratefully. Even if he didn't trust her or Morgause, he hid it well. "We should go," he suggested. "Lancelot is getting Merlin."
The three of them walked down the stairs to the second floor. There, Gwen and Elyan were coming out of Gwen's room, Elyan's hand on his sister's back. When Guinevere saw Morgana she hugged her. Morgana winced and Gwen stepped back quickly.
"What is it?" she asked, trying to hide her hurt.
"It's not you," Morgana assured her quickly. "It's my side. It hasn't healed. It hasn't even been stitched yet. It can wait, though," she said. "We need to do this." Gwen took her hand and together they went down the stairs, the others following. Gaius had been covered by a white sheet. Gwaine and Morgause were standing a distance apart downstairs in silence. Percival tenderly picked up the still form. Behind him, the procession moved solemnly outside and down to the lakeside.
Percival laid Gaius gently in the bottom of the boat. He still couldn't imagine him as anything but a frail, kind old man. They had taken off the ridiculous pin-striped suit and put him in very Gaius-y robes. Gwen, Morgana, and Merlin placed the bundles of flowers they had picked around the old man. Percival knelt first.
"I didn't know you as long as the others," he said, "But the few years I knew you showed you to be someone I could trust." Next was Lancelot.
"I didn't know you well," he said. "I stayed in your home, and you were gracious. You scolded Merlin for lying about me, but you understood. There are very few who would." Elyan stepped up.
"You were always there," he said. "Even when I was a young boy. You always had time to entertain me with a chemical reaction." His laugh turned into a sob. "You taught me the value in kindness and the strength in compassion. I'll never forget that."
"You served my father for years," Arthur said to the corpse. "I've known you since I was a boy. I fear I was not always good to you. I apologize. You were always so good to my family. I trusted your council more than you know, certainly more than I showed. I will miss you, dear friend." Arthur stepped back, wiping a single tear from his eye.
Gwaine approached the boat and knelt. He said something too quiet for any of the others to hear. When he left, he sniffled loudly. Gwen knelt by the boat, but she didn't say anything. She took a folded bit of paper from her pocket and placed it in the front fold of Gaius's robe.
"Goodbye," she said, tears running from her face. Arthur took her in his arms and held her as she cried. Morgana hesitantly approached the old man.
She was keenly aware of everyone watching and listening, so she spoke quietly. Only Merlin could hear her.
"I wronged you many times, old friend. I made Alator of the Catha torture you. I wanted to know about Emrys, and in doing so I hurt my oldest friend. I don't regret everything, but I regret anything that hurt you.
"You helped me since I was a child. I was a scared little girl who had just lost her father, and you helped me. Thank you, Gaius. There are not many I can say this to, but I can to you. I love you." Morgana's eyes were still dry when she rose from Gaius's side. Merlin nodded at her. It was a small gesture, but it gave her enough strength to continue walking to her sister. Morgause took her hand and squeezed it gently.
"There are no words," said Merlin quietly, "to express what I feel. When you were kidnapped, I was alone then also. Well, Gwen tried to help. And Gwaine. Now we all grieve, for we know that you are dead. I am not so alone, and yet more so than ever. You - I miss you. So much. I wish you could come back to me."
I just got you back! Merlin cried in his head. "You were dead for almost a thousand years. I thought when we found you in that cab that I'd have another lifetime with you, but I forgot that your lifetime was already almost over. I didn't think. I was unprepared. Now you're gone."
Merlin leaned over Gaius and kissed his wrinkled forehead. He then stood. Gwaine came up behind him and put a hand on Merlin's shoulder. Lancelot and Percival pushed the boat off the earth until it glided through the water easily. Merlin's eyes flashed, and the boat continued to move.
"I can't," he said. Morgana understood. Stepping away from Morgause, she whispered,
"Bæwylm." The boat burst into flames, consuming Gaius. It was too far away too see, but she could imagine how the fire would lick over him. She imagined how it would shrivel the flowers she had picked. How it would seep into his skin and cause it to crack and break. They were terrible thoughts, but she couldn't stop them.
The boat drifted behind the island that held the tower and out of sight.
"It's over," Lancelot said to them all.
"It's never over," Morgana said bitterly. "The pain may go away, but the memories stay and haunt you. In time, the good times fade and the bad consume your mind. It's never over," she repeated. "It has only just begun."