“You ready to go?”
Alix looked to where Taivon was standing by the door. He wore his usual jeans, boots, and that jacket. His stance was a little less tense than when he'd arrived – legs shoulder-width apart, back ramrod straight, one hand in his pocket, and long fingers playing with his keys.
“Should I bring anything?” she asked.
Taivon gave her a tight smile before looking at something behind her. “Just you.”
“Okay. Good.”
“On second thought, maybe something that'll make your cat stop hating me.”
Turning around, she saw Chief slowly creeping towards her. His eyes – if it were possible – narrowed at her and then at Taivon and back again. A low hiss escaped his mouth, ears flat to his head as he all but climbed up her leg and jumped into her arms.
She pet his furry head. “What's wrong, kitty?”
“I think he hates me.”
“Do you have a dog?” Alix walked over to Taivon.
He gulped, taking a step backward until his back met the wall. “When I was younger.”
“But not anymore?”
Chief hissed and wriggled around in her arms until both his front paws were on her shoulder and his whiskers were rubbing her cheek. Stroking him, she kissed his head and took a step closer to Taivon. Once again, her kitty hissed, moving until almost all of him was resting on her shoulder.
“No.” Taivon shook his head. “Not anymore. I think Chief just doesn't like me. Maybe it's my hair or something. Haven't got it cut in such a long time.”
She looked at his thick, brown hair and short beard. The collection of strands were split at the ends, looking glossy in her apartment light. Her hands itched to run their fingers through the expanse. She could do it right now, in fact. Just a little reach would be all it took, and she'd be touching his hair.
She'd never been so caught up in something as simple as hair.
“I like your hair.”
“Really?” That same word popped out of his mouth, as if he didn't believe her.
“No, I'm lying to you.” She grinned, lacing her voice with as much sarcasm as she could.
Taivon frowned. “You are?”
His question had her looking up at him, to see if he was actually serious. His brow was furrowed, and his eyes held so much sadness that it hurt to look at him. He really didn't understand. The man was serious – and hurting. She didn't know why, but she felt the sudden need to shield him from all things bad in the world.
“Hey,” Alix said, softly, putting Chief down, “you feeling alright?”
His lower lip trembled. Eyes looked away. He said, “Fi-ine.”
“Are you sure? You want some Tylenol?”
“No. Thanks. I'm good. Just a little bit of a headache is all.”
He smiled, but it was shaky. Nothing at all like the grin she'd seen just a week ago. Alix knew that his grins were far and few between, but still, even his constant half-smiles were better than this watery attempt.
“Ya wanna head out?”
“Sure,” she said.
After closing the door, Alix took his hand in hers and walked with him. The light breeze blew across her face, fresh, crisp, and clean. With it came Taivon's scent. The woodsy pine and soap smell shouldn't have been so familiar or so comforting, but it was, and she found herself leaning against him as they neared his waiting SUV.
“Remember,” he whispered, a few inches from ear.
She shuddered. “Remember what?”
He didn't reply, only opening up the car door for her and then closing it again. As she buckled up her seat belt, Alix watched his broad form walk around to the other side of the car. He was in the driver's seat a moment later, quietly closing the door and starting the car.
“What am I supposed to remember?”
“The rules.”
“Got it. Even though I don't know 'em yet.” After a few long moments of silence, she asked, “Where are we going?”
“To a few movies. One of those outdoor theatres.”
“What are those like?”
Taivon turned his head and looked at her, a small, teasing smile on his lips. “You've never been to one before?”
“It's not my fault. I grew up in the city. We're more...modern.” She laughed.
“You miss out on stuff that way. Trust me, these are so much better than indoor ones – just as long as it doesn't rain.”
“Is it?”
“Is it what?”
“Supposed to rain tonight?”
He shook his head. “No, ma'am. The temp's supposed to drop, though. But I have blankets.”
“And you,” she said, imagining what it would feel like to be wrapped up in his bare arms.
His entire body probably kicked out heat, just like her own personal, attractive furnace. With a chest as broad as his, she'd undoubtedly feel like the safest person in the world. His arms would be steel bands around her, and his legs would be tangled with hers. They'd lie there, sweaty and spent from hours of intense-
Nope, Alix, she told herself. He's different. Have a decent relationship for once.
“What about me?”
“You seem like you'd be warm. Like, really warm.”
Taivon took her hand in his then and just twined their fingers together. His thumb rubbed circles along hers, the callouses creating tingly sensations on her skin. The little electric bolts shot up her arm, into her chest, and down – much lower.
She rubbed his thumb right back, tracing her own patterns on the knuckles. With every passing smile, Alix saw and felt as he relaxed more. His posture wasn't as ramrod straight as when they'd been at her apartment; and with every stroke against her thumb, the rigidness of his jaw went down.
When they got to the drive-in movie theatre, Taivon payed for their tickets through the window and then drove into the lot. The grassy area was filled with cars. More streamed in, but he got a parking spot in time.
Taivon released her hand. “And this, my dear, is a drive-in movie theatre.”
“But we're in a car.”
“Hey.” He raised one hand, mock defensiveness in his voice. “We just parked. Give me a minute, will ya?”
“I'm pretty sure it's already been a minute.”
“Two minutes, then.”
“Better hurry.” She laughed.
He got out of the car again, and opened the door for her. She took his hand as they went to the trunk for the blankets. When he bent down to get another one from the trunk, his jeans stretched across his rear end. Once again, her hands itched to touch him, but this time, it wasn't his hair. Just a playful slap, and she'd be happy.
Save that for later dates, Alix.
“Whatchya lookin' at?” he asked, folded blankets in one arm.
She felt her face turn red but just grabbed the arm carrying the blankets. Weaving in and out of cars, they went to a main building where people were taking their kids to the bathroom. What looked to be a concession stand was right next to it, smelling of buttery popcorn and sugary treats.
“Do you want anything?” Taivon asked as they neared the stand.
She just went for it, too engrossed by the delicious golden kernels being popped in front of her. “I like popcorn.”
He chuckled, eyes crinkling at the corners, before turning around and ordering. A large bucket of popcorn was held out to her in the next instant, and she took it. The scent of butter and salt almost made her eyes roll back into her head. It was the only thing she thought of as Taivon laid out a blanket in the spacious field and sat down on it.
His legs were crossed, and he rested his palms on the blanket, back leaned back as he looked up at her with those brown eyes. There was about another three feet of blanket left for her. He was all the way to the side. The bottle of water he purchased was on top of the other blankets.
Setting the popcorn bucket down first, Alix sat down next to him and crossed her legs, just like his. Their clothed knees brushed then, but she could still feel the heat radiating off of him. If his leg was that warm, she couldn't even imagine how good his chest would feel.
“Do you want some?” she held the popcorn out to him, chewing on it as gracefully as possible.
“No, thanks. I'm good,” he said, taking a drink of his water.
She thought back to the grilled chicken salad and the fat free dressing he'd order during dinner. It wasn't something that men usually ate. No, men as big as him typically ate burgers, fries, and cheesy stuff – never just stopping at a half a beer, either.
“I've never met one before,” she said.
“Never met one what?”
“A health freak.”
He smiled, revealing straight teeth. “I wouldn't say freak. Just conscious about that kinda stuff.”
“Do you work out a lot?”
He shrugged, rolling shoulders that most definitely saw work. “I wouldn't say a lot.”
“Oh, please,” she said. “You so work out a lot. You're just being modest. Seriously, there's no way you can look like that and not work out at least ten hours a day.”
“Two. I work out two hours, actually. Run a few miles in the morning and do my weights afterwards. At Yellowstone, they'll sometimes get me to stay after to lift some of the heavier stuff.”
“Well, I sometimes walk my cat. Or play basketball with my brother.”
“You're one of those people who can eat whatever they want and not gain an ounce, aren't ya?”
Alix stuffed a handful into her mouth. “Yeah, sorta. But it'll probably catch up with me when I'm older.”
“Oh, God. I wish I was like that.”
Reaching over, she poked his stomach through the jacket. Her finger didn't get sucked in or even press in. It just stopped, hitting the wall that was his hard stomach. His hand went over hers in the next instant, and he leaned back onto his bent elbows.
“It kinda feels like you are,” she said.
“Nah.” Taivon shook his head. “If I so much as look at a donut, I gain ten pounds.”
“What about popcorn?”
“Almost worse. It's been months since I've had anything like that.”
“You want some?”
He shook his head. “No.”
“But it's so good.”
“Seriously, if I so much as nibble on something that isn't healthy, my entire day is shot. I'll just go to the store, pick up some candy bars, ice cream, chips, pizza, and all that other good stuff and eat until I explode.”
“Ah...” she said, thoughtfully. “All or nothing, then.”
“Exactly. Definitely not worth it.”
“So worth it. Nom nom nom.” She noisily munched on the popcorn, grinning at his teasing eye roll.
He was just so much more relaxed tonight. This more eased state was just another part of the peanut shell to be removed. And this was only their second official date. She couldn't even begin to imagine how great they would be together on the tenth one.
“Movie's gonna start soon,” he murmured, voice low, almost dazed.
“Okie doke.”
With a groan, Taivon lay down, using the extra blankets as a pillow. He took the hand out of his pocket and used it to pat the spot right next to him, his fingertips brushing against her knee. His eyes looked almost pleading as he squeezed her fingers and brought her hand onto his chest.
“Should I lay down?” she asked.
He smiled and then looked at her expectantly, motioning with those brown eyes for her to go between the crook of his shoulder. So, she did. Putting the popcorn bucket off to the side, Alix pressed her hand onto his jacket and then snuggled into him, resting her head at his shoulder.
He smelt absolutely delicious – like the crisp outdoors with just a hint of soap. As expected, the contact of her front lying against hers warded off the breezy chill in the air. She felt as if she were in a Taivon coccoon.
“What movie's playing?”
His answer was to put a finger to his finger to his lips and then point at the giant, movie theatre screen. Previews played and then a few advertisements about the concession stand before an animated family appeared on the screen. Their son, Justin, carried a toy airplane up a ramp, fell into a fake pyramid, and then shot up into the air.
“Despicable Me?” she whispered.
Taivon nodded and wrapped his arms more firmly around her. “Mhm.”
The ninety minute movie felt like it was only on for a few minutes. With every adorable scene, she couldn't help but laugh and bury her face into Taivon's chest. His torso moved whenever he let out a low chuckle. Just the sight of him grinning at a children's movie made something inside of her clench.
Maybe it was the lull invoked from laying in his arms or maybe it was how upbeat and adorable the movie was, but either way, it ended all too soon. As the ending credits began, families began to pack up their blankets, chairs, and children, going to their cars before driving off. Taivon made no move to get up, and neither did she, content to just stay right where she was – even if her side had gone numb a half hour ago.
Releasing her hand, Taivon asked, “Did you like it?”
“It was so cute!”
“Come over here,” he whispered, cupping her face with his free hand.
She leaned forward, keeping her eyes open. His pupils enlarged, and his breath fanned across her face, feeling warm. Closing her eyes, Alix lifted her chin up and followed the guiding hand on her face. Only, lips didn't press against her own, but rather, to her forehead. She could literally feel the smile in his forehead kiss.
“What?” she asked, when he pulled back.
“You're cute.”
Alix tapped his nose. “And so are you.”
“Next one starts in ten minutes,” he said before standing up and holding out a hand to her. “Wanna walk around until then? Stretch out your legs a bit?”
She grabbed his hand and then walked with him around the field. There were still quite a few vehicles left, mostly occupied by teenagers and other adults. A few looked their way when they walked past but dismissed them with a quick glance.
“What's the next movie?” she asked.
“The Wolverine.”
“How long is that one?”
“What?” he asked, looking at her with one of those half-smiles. “Bored with me already?”
“For some reason, I doubt that'll ever happen.”
“You flatter me too much, ya know that?”
“I don't see why you'd complain about that.” She laughed. “Most men want their egos inflated as much as possible.”
“I'm confident with the size of my ego.”
The way he said it all but forced Alix into thinking about the size of something else. There was just way too much innuendo and charisma in those words for her to not think that way. But it was Taivon. Maybe he didn't mean it that way. Or maybe he did. She really hoped he did.
“Oh, no,” he said, moments later, crushing her hopeful understanding. “That's not...That's not what I meant. It was just an honest response. I mean, it's not like I'm microscopic or anything, but-”
“That's...good.”
“That's not what I meant either!” He took his hand from hers and wiped it over his face, stopping them dead in their tracks. “Why the hell do you make me say bad things?”
“They're not bad,” she said, stepping closer until her hand held the one hanging at his side. “It's kinda funny, actually.”
“Come on.” Taivon grabbed her hand and led them through the other vehicles. “Movie's gonna start soon.”
They sat down, both just holding hands as the opening credits began. It was much louder than the other movie, but Alix was sucked into all the action, explosions, and death. Hugh Jackman was one of her favorite actors. She could stare at his arms all day.
When the man's shirt came off, she turned to Taivon and looked at the hand holding hers. The long fingers led up to a thick wrist that disappeared in the sleeves of his jacket. During their dinner date, when he'd been just wearing a plain shirt, she'd gotten a full view of those guns.
Way better than Hugh Jackman's.
Just because she could, Alix gave his shoulder a fundamental squeeze. The muscles in his neck and shoulder, although at rest, felt hard and comforting to the touch. His chest rose faster as she rubbed her hand up and down his shoulder, closing her eyes at the warmth she found there.
“Told you,” she said. “Nice and warm.”
“I do my best,” he said, nervously.
Laying her head back down, Alix looked back up at the giant screen and watched as the girl and Hugh went over to a fire at the house. There was something so relaxed about the scene but so charged with sexual tension that Alix felt her own heart rate begin to accelerate.
Then, Hugh kissed the girl.
A hand landed over her eyes as it got more heated. “Don't watch.”
As much as she liked the feel of his hand on her, she tried to wriggle out of his grasp. She was liking the movie so far, and this would be one of the best parts. Those arms were not something that any woman wanted to miss out on.
“Why can't I watch?” Alix grumbled, unable to keep the smile off her face.
“I'm trying to be a gentleman here, Alix.”
“How is this gentlemanly? You're taking away my right to free sight.”
“That's not an actual thing,” he breathed, right against her neck.
“If I want to watch a sex scene, then I will freakin' watch a sex scene.”
“Why do you wanna watch it so much?”
“Well, first of all, I am an adult. Second, you not wanting me to watch it has only reinforced the fact that I want to watch it.”
“Is it 'cause you need ideas for your books?”
She could feel her ears redden at that. “No.”
“Then how come you need it so much?” He laughed, breath blowing over her ear and neck.
She squirmed, only to smack into his torso. “I don't need it, but seriously, it's part of the movie. What if the entire climax-”
“No pun intended.”
“Shut up.” She slapped her hand against his hard, jacket-covered chest. “What if the entire climax relies solely on this scene?”
“Trust me, it doesn't. She's like twenty, and he's a good forty-five.”
“So?” Behind Taivon's hand, Alix rolled her eyes, grinning from ear to ear. “My dad's at least ten years older than my mom, and they're still cool with it.”
“You like older men?”
Flattening her hand against his torso, she answered, “I kinda have to with you now, don't I?”
“How old are you?”
“Twenty-five.” When he didn't say anything, she asked, “How old are you?”
He took his hand off her eyes. “Turned thirty-one in March.”
“What day?”
“The seventeenth.” Turning his head back to the movie, he said, “It's over. You can look now.”
For the rest of the movie, she didn't pay as much attention to it as she did to him. She felt every rise and fall of his chest, every hitch in his breath whenever a more intense part came on. His head rested against the makeshift pillow of blankets, and she could see the cords in his neck.
“Taivon?” she whispered.
He lifted his head up and looked down at her. “Yeah?”
“Hi.”
“Hey,” he said, licking his lips.
She was captured by the movement of his tongue and wondered what it would feel like against hers. Their eyes met then, and just like last time, he cupped her face with his hand, long fingers just barely brushing against her hair.
Taivon leaned forward. “You wanna kiss me?”
“Sure. Why not?”
“Don't act too excited. Things could be worse, right?”
“Yeah,” she breathed, feeling his lips brush against hers just the tiniest bit. “But they couldn't be better.”
Closing her eyes, she tilted her head until their lips locked together. There was no nose bumping this time, just the simple connection of lips. Underneath hers, his mouth opened on a heavy exhale. For a long while, neither one of them moved.
But then, she moved her lips. Just the tiniest bit.
It was enough to get him to respond, to get his lips to move against hers and create a delicious, silky friction. The simple contact made her skin become prickly with awareness. Maybe it was the breeze that'd been there all night, but Alix could feel goosebumps covering every inch of her skin.
She shuddered and, keeping her eyes closed, moved her hands to run through his thick hair. The strands bristled against her palm and felt smooth against her skin. When she ran her tongue along his lower lip this time, Taivon opened.
His tongue tentatively traced her lips, tasting of just plain male. Something akin to a whimper and groan reverberated from him and into her, followed by an intense heat that made her body feel like fire. The sound made her want to disregard the rules of waiting and strip him bare right now.
With a heavy gasp, Taivon pulled away. His hands shook as he ran one through his hair and the other over his face. Eyes that had been so happy and light were now heavy with a hurting pain that Alix couldn't even begin to decipher.
“I guh-guh-guh-gotta use the ba-ba-bathroom. Suh-suh-sorry.”
He was gone in the next instant. She lost sight of him in the dark. Now, she just felt cold. The chill wasn't from the weather but from being alone. Hugging her knees to her chest, she sat up and watched the movie. Hugh Jackman wasn't nearly as appealing as he'd been in the start.
When he came back, Taivon sat down, but he was as far away from her as possible. She craned her head every now and then, trying to tell what was wrong. All she saw her his eyes.
They looked red. Swollen. As if he'd been crying.