tell me: if something is recurring, shouldn't it be familiar? shouldn't its onset fill you with recognition? if something happens again and again - let's say it's something shocking - shouldn't its effects be dimmed? like a choreography, everything as is, danced day after day, as if the steps are mapped out on the floor with glowing tape. so this dance has been lived so much it's lifeless.
loss of life, recurring.
but what of emptiness?
emptiness, recurring?
why don't the effects of emptiness fade as each week is consumed by my own dance? i am not a dancer. but i do waver between being full of life and being empty of life. sometimes i waver between twice a week, or day to day.
sometimes twice a day. sometimes more.
but every time the emptiness returns, it's just as taking as it was the first time - taking my breath, my organs, my hope, and the part of my bones that were glass.
emptiness, recurring doesn't care about what it should be.