this chapter was fun to write for me, it's alot of fluff, but this story needs it for whats coming up in the next little bit. it took me longer to update than usually, but I doubt that's a big deal, correct everyone that's reading ? :P
anyhoooooow, enjoy the read and COMMETN and VOTE for me.
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CHAPTER SIX:
JASON
Ugggh, I’m a disgusting human being. I couldn’t sleep last night, not in that bed where I did those things. I ended up rubbing one out thinking about fooling around with Daniel, actually, it was a few more than one. I think I spent a good three hours in total, just fantasizing about him. How could I look him in the eye today, this was so embarrassing.
I closed the gate to my units grounds behind me. Living down town, the housing wasn’t the best. I lived in a complex that was once a motel, has the bullet holes in the ceilings to prove it,. Okay, that was dark, moving along. It was a decent place, though I have to start looking for a part-time job to pay my mother rent. She said since the landlord has bumped up the monthly rate, shes having troubles making ends meet.
Regardless of the shit going on lately, I had a bounce in my step today after realizing that I just might be in love with Daniel, though I’m not gay, he’s just an exception. I know I freaked out last time when he tried to take it further with me than just rubbing, but next time it happens, I’ll be ready. I had to do some research last night on how two guys do it. Some of the stuff got a bit graffic and I gave up, but I learned something interesting about what to do for the guy on bottom - which let's face it will be me - Tensing and loosening at the right times. I practised it as I walked.
there is something really fucked up with me and I enjoyed it.
Every inch of my body was on fire today, but unfortunately, it wasn’t because of Dan. All my muscles burned with every movement because of yesterday. I guess I’ll just go to the druggies hangout after first and get some strong pain killers. They owed me anyway, I covered for them last time they did a deal in school and almost got caught.
“Surprised you're here today.” Jesso said, sliding up beside me. It's weird that I'd run into him before Daniel, but I guess he’s running late or something. Though, we shared a locker, so I was bound to cross paths with him at some point . I was going to tell him today.
“Yeah, I wanted to stay home, but I got stuff to do at school today.”
“Ohh, this coming from the guy that's famous for jumping from the second story window just to get out of class.”
“That was my first year. I was being stupid was all. Practically killed my fucking ankle.” I laughed at the memory, Dan had to piggy back me all over school for a week straight. “ that hurt more than my body does right now.” I lied.
“Speaking of which, I heard that Malark feels so bad about it all that he wants to make it up to you and apologize. I wouldn’t be surprised if he bought you a bouquet of flowers or something.”
“I wouldn’t except them.” I laughed.
“Don’t be so heartless man, the poor guy thinks this will get him kicked off the team.”
“That won’t ....... happen .....” I trailed off, distracted by what was coming through the main doors. Everything around me fell away, my only focus being the new arrivals.
Daniel was walking beside Marco, smiling as if everything was right in the world. There was a round kiss shaped bruise just below his ear that he made no attempt to hide and his purple v neck wasn’t his own. It was one of Marcos beloved shirts ......
My brain grinded to a halt on one thought. They fucked last night. There was no other way to look at it. Dan went home with Marco after the game, I didn’t see him on the way to school this morning and now he’s wearing clothes borrowed from Marcos closet.
They were flaunting their relationship in every ones face. I could tell all the students had followed the same train of thought that I had because they all got straight to whispering and casting snide glances at the couple.
I was torn at this point, I wanted to defend Dan, saying that he wasn’t gay or that it didn’t matter if he was. at the same time though, I wanted to punch him in the jaw for giving his first time with another man to that dick for brains Marco. What bothered me most was the fact that when they stood there, side by side surrounded by students, they looked perfect for each other. Daniel with his lean swimmers build, soft features and composed even stare with a smile on the edge of his lips contrasted Marco perfectly with his slightly smaller shoulders, taught muscles and outgoing hauty walk.
“Umm, Jason, what’s going on with those two .....?” Jesso asked, pointing a finger halfheartedly at them as they ascended the forum stairs, ignoring the glances from the crowd below.
“We saw nothing.” I growled, taking his shoulders and pushing him to first period history class. I wish I hadn't seen anything, might be easier to live with this heartbreak if I'd only heard it through the grape vine and not seen it with my own eyes.
I sulked through the entire first period, making it to second period Spanish class, though I slumped forward on my desk in depression. Why the fuck did I have to figure out I love the guy the moment he goes and does that with some other dude.
“Need some cheering up?” Dana asked, leaning over her desk behind me. He boobs were popping out of the front of her shirt. She was a huge slut and was my favourite fuck buddy last year. We used to go and get high than have sex when we got bored of school, or when one of us was horny.
“Nah, I think I’ll manage.”
“Come on,” she whined, pouting her thick lips coated in pink gloss. “I’m the best when it comes to forgetting your problems.” She poked the inside of her cheek with her tongue to remind me of her special skill. She did give the best head ....
“I’m already in class, it’s to hard to get out now.” I mumbled, letting my eyes fix on her cleavage. At least I still had my big boob fetish to rely on if Dan was going to ditch me. The idea of fooling around with her for a bit sounded good. My body really did need to forget the feel of Dan's touch already.
“Well, we could always do it later. I’m hanging out with a few people after third in the music store down the street. Just find me if you wanna do it.” She ran her finger over her collar bone to turn me on. It worked well enough.
“I just might take you up on the offer.”
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DANIEL
I paced back and forth in the bathroom, my finger hesitating over the send button on my phone. I spent the past ten minutes trying to write the perfect text to get Jason to meet me in the boy's bathroom on the first floor. In the end I just had “ I’ve got something important to tell you, meet me in the bathroom”
Swallowing I punched the send, heaving a sigh. Last night I stayed at Marco's just falling asleep with him. it was our farewell night. I’ve decided that there is enough of a chance that I might be able to get Jason that I should go for it. Marco made me promise that if things didn’t work with Jason I wouldn’t come back to him ever again because he wasn’t waiting.
I was genuinely sad that Marco and I had broken up. He understood me well and had moments where he was really caring and adorable. I’d miss having him to unload my problems on and take out my frustration with, but I had to do this. I’ve loved Jason since I knew what love was. right now was the time to strike, Jason was open to me being gay and was out of his element with all this. Which meant he was unsure and uneasy, making it simple to manipulate. I know that sounds cold and cruel, but I loved him so much, I had to be cold and cruel. This is what love does to you I guess.
My phone buzzed and I whipped it open for his reply.
“ I got class right now so it's not like I can just skip out. I'll talk with you later, I’m sure it can wait.”
Oh no, I’m not letting him off. He was going to come here and fall in love with me even if he didn’t know it himself yet. I just had to give the most sincere love confession known and he’ll be all mine for good. I don’t expect to start dating today, but it will happen in the near future for sure.
“ No sorry, it can’t. Just get here now before I come to your Spanish class and get you personally.”
tapping my foot, I waited for his reply.
“ alright, I get it, I’ll be there in a few minutes.”
Ahh, thank god, I thought that’d take a lot longer than it did. I leaned against the fake marble sink’s rim, tapping my phone against my chin. What was I going to say to him? I couldn’t very well blab out that I love him or that I want to fuck his brains out every time I see him. I guess I could just explain it..... no. Bad idea. Beating around the bush never works with Jason, he’d only be more confused than before and not see the deeper meaning. Sometimes he can be an air head when he wants to avoid the real facts.
Just like what happened at his house. He must have brushed it off as something that I did because I was a sex starved gay or something along that line. If he just thought about it for a minute, he’d be able to see through my intentions right now. I guess it’s a good thing he was being an idiot for now, other wise he’d be telling me to fuck off.
The bathroom door creaked open and the short slim figure of Jason slipped in. He looked good today, wearing a tight white t shirt with a cardigan over it and black jeans. The necklace I gave him as a present in the forth grade hung around his neck like always, the little feather charm dangling at the end. It meant more to me than it ever did to him, but it made me happy the days that he wore it.
Jason pushed the wooden wedge under the door to make sure no one unwanted entered while we chatted. All the better for me, though it did put indecent thoughts in my mind.
“So.” He said, squaring his shoulders and bracing himself. “ what was it you wanted to talk about?”
“Why are you bracing yourself for a fight?” I asked, noting his clenched fists.
“Not a fight, I just really don’t want to hear what you're about to say.”
That stung a bit. “How do you know what I’m going to say?” I asked, trying to hide behind a playful smirk. Jason grimaced in return.
Wait, did he figure out my feelings already? Was he only here to turn me down straight to my face then. I guess I should give him more credit when it comes to reading people.
“I think I’ve got a pretty good idea.” He growled, glaring at the floor. “Has something to do with what’s on your neck right and that ugly ass purple shirt, right?”
I glanced into the mirror at my side and blushed when I saw a purple circle blooming on my neck. It was just past my ear, so I hadn’t noticed it until now. I should have worn a turtle neck or something to cover up that eye sore.
“I suppose it does in a way..... but not like you think.”I muttered, not meeting his gaze.
“look, I really don’t want to hear about how good your first time with your boyfriend was. That's not something that really interest me, 'ya know, being straight and all.”
I stood in shock. I guess any normal person would figure that out from my appearance, but he didn't have to add in that little insult. I never wanted Jason to know that I’ve done it with another guy, but I guess it was bound to come out at some point. I didn’t exactly go to great lengths to cover it up in the first place.
“that wasn’t anything like what I wanted to tell you.” I said, feeling lost in the conversation now.
“ I just want to know why he had to be your first?” Jason's voice sounded strange so my eyes jumped to his face. His eye lashes were soaked in tears that had yet to fall.
“Jason...” I gasped. I was desperate to stop him from being this depressed. My hand reached for him but he flinched away, already turning to leave. “ don’t run away from me.” I called, grabbing the neck of his shirt and pulling him back.
“ STOP!” Jason screamed, scratching at my hands. I kicked his foot to knock him of balance and use that to push him against the sinks counter. I put my hands on either side of him, letting my face drop to his height.
“don’t cry over something like that.”
“I’m not, I’m just really pissed off. He doesn’t deserve the right to be your first. He hasn’t know you as long as I have, he only wants you for your body, he’s not as close to you as me, and he’s not even better looking than me! I mean, you fooled around with me first right?”
“Why are you comparing yourself to him-....” A thought occurred to me in that moment that made my heart race. “Don’t tell me, did you want to be my first guy?” I asked, my voice shaking.
“You make it sound so lame.” He mumbled turning his face away from me, but I could see the blush on his neck. “And I really hate looking at that hickey ...” he muttered.
I took his face in my hands, making him met my gaze, his were still tear filled and it killed me. “Jason, don’t lie to me okay? Answer this honestly ...... do you like me?”
“You’re my best friend, of course I have to like you.”
“Not like that, you know that I mean romantically.”
“But your in love with Mar-hic-co” he hicupped , fresh tears spilling over.
“I’m not I’m not.” I raced to explain all this to him. “ Last night Marco and I realized that we can’t go on in our relationship so we broke up.”
“Was the sex that bad?” he asked, averting his eyes.That jab a loose attempt to mask his emotions.
“No, that’s not why we broke up. It was because I’m in love with you.” I said with so much force in my voice Jason tensed up, not even able to make it into a joke or doubt it.
“Nghh.” He tried to say something, but his bottom lip quivered so he stopped.
“When we were in elementary school, we went to the beach and you forgot your swim trunks so you swam naked and I sat out on the beach, remember that?”
“Yeah.” I mumbled.
“That was because that was the first time I realized I was attracted to guys in that way.” he let a surprised giggle slip out and I chuckled at my own embarrassment.“ I know I’m gay because I’ve loved you since I was little and found out about romantic relationships. I knew you were straight and only wanted to chase girls, so I never even thought about us. Than when Marco saw how I looked at you, he asked me if I wanted to date him so I could stop hurting so much.”
“Stupid,” Jason interrupted me.
“Yeah, but I was going to go through with it until I forgot my feelings for you. But than you went and came on to me at your house and we ended up doing ..... well, what we did. I got way to excited and scarred you-”
“I wasn’t scarred.” He barked, the familiar wrinkle forming on his nose when he tried to act tough.
“Either way, I didn’t mean to make a move on you so fast. I just got carried away and did that without thinking, I’m so sorry. I thought you’d hate me forever when you told me to leave after that.”
“I don’t hate you.”
“Than do you love me?”
There was a beat of silence than Jason burst into a rage. “ I DON’T KNOW. I don’t get any of this anymore. I’ve never liked a guy before and I always thought the feelings I had for you ended at friendship. I’ve never even felt this way about a girl before and that ...... sca ...... res .... me so .....much.”
Why did he hate admitting he was scarred?
I couldn’t hold out any longer, this was the end of my restraint. I pulled his face to mine, kissing him softly on the lips than kissing away the tears that had rolled down his cheek. He whimpered, his hands reaching to ball in the fabric of the front of my shirt, twisting it in frustration.
“Jason, I love you so much I don’t think I can love anyone else. I won’t love anyone else so long as I can be at your side.”
He leaned forward on his tip toes to kiss me softly. He liked to believe that we were almost the same height, but he was a whole five inches shorter than my 6’3. The soft sweet peck turned into us holding each other in thigh embraces, our tongues twisting together and roaming around each others mouths. The kiss was so sweet it was bitter. I still didn’t know his feelings and he was kissing me with only half his heart, still unsure of what he actually felt for me.
I forced my mouth down harder on him and griped his blonde hair in my fingers. He tasted sweet, and his lips grew warm and taught against mine. Jason moaned into my mouth, pushing himself hard into me so every part of our bodies touched.
Holding his hips, I lifted him up onto the counter and he automatically locked his legs behind my waist, holding me in place. His eyes had darkened and his gaze was filled with lust and anger. It made my heart tighten to see him feeling so much for me.
“I’m still really mad at you.” He breathed. His pale hand reached out to pinch my chin in his fingers and bring my face to his. My lips ached for the touch of his, but he turned my face away before they could make any contact. Instead his mouth jumped to my jaw, licking and sucking along my neck and making a trail of wet kisses down. I groaned, wrapping my arms around his slight waist and pressing him to my chest.
Jason suddenly pushed my head to the side with one hand and yanked my collar away form my neck with the other.
“ Jason, what are you – OW.” I yelped. He had sunk his teeth into the skin on my shoulder, biting down with his full jaw power. I was to stunned to try and break away from him after he detached his teeth from my skin. Jason's tongue jetted out several times to lick over the wound before he sat back to enjoy his work.
I leaned around him, relaxing my hold on him slightly. The mirror at his back reflected the red and purple bite mark on my shoulder. He had bitten hard enough to break the skin in two places, drawing a small bead of blood from the wound.
“Why did you do that?” I asked astounded, still staring at the mark in the mirror. Why did I feel happy about it?
“It acts as insect repellent.”
“What?”
“To keep the stupid fucking fly away from you. That one that left the bruise on the other side of your neck.” He growled, crossing his arms over his chest and smiling haughtily.
“Hmmmm, effective.”
“Yup, that and it was payback for all this confusing shit you’ve gotten me into now.”
“Sorry about that.” I chuckled, leaning to bump my forehead with his.
Whoever wrote the quote 'First loves never last' better be wrong.