*Disclaimer: I do not own the rights to the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles franchise.
*Author's Notes: I've returned with a new chapter of 'Lost in the Fight' and it's another emotional one. Well, more emotional than the average chapter. There's quite a bit of angst in this one.
I can't possibly thank everyone enough for reading my stories or for the incredible amount of support that I have received. Your feedback and encouragement means so much to me. Thank you all from the bottom of my heart. I am so grateful to you . . . 8}
I really hope you enjoy the second half of the chapter. ;) CJ
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Chapter 40 - Lost in the Fight - Part 2
"Tell me, Donnie. What were you so afraid of?"
The words echoed in the back of Donatello's brain as he stared doe-eyed at his oldest brother whose face was now the very epitome of patience, implying that he was willing to wait until the end of time for a response.
"What were you so afraid of?"
The question had seemed simple enough, but answering it was anything but simple. Perhaps that was because Donnie suddenly felt as though his mouth was filled with sand and his jaw had been wired shut.
Leonardo must have sensed his genius brother's distress, because he started to ever-so softly tighten his hold on Donnie's face as if to inform him that he wasn't about to let him go. That slight increase in pressure was what ultimately cracked Donatello's walls.
Swallowing thickly several times, Donnie managed to clear his mouth and throat of any obstructions. Still, his voice barely registered above a whisper, but it was loud enough.
"When you, uh . . . When you told me to look at you just now . . . and y – you – you pushed your hand against my neck . . . Well, it, um . . . it reminded me of Tiger Claw. When we were in that warehouse . . . he ordered m – me to look at him when he spoke. He held a sword to my throat and forced me to lift my head up s – so I had to look him in the eye. Then he . . . he threatened to beat me within an inch of my life."
Both shocked and appalled by Donnie's revelation, Leonardo instantly released his hold on his wounded brother's face, afraid he was going to upset him further than he already had. The discovery that he had personally been the one responsible for eliciting such a painful memory made Leo's flesh crawl. He looked down at his hands as though they had just committed the most heinous of crimes, much the same way he had after he had struck Donnie.
What is wrong with me? Why do I keep hurting him over and over again?
Peering back up at Donatello, Leonardo could see the tears glistening in his second youngest brother's eyes. The leader in blue wanted so badly to wrap poor Donnie up in his arms and console him, but he was afraid that too much too soon might cause his introverted brother to put his defenses back up. Leo couldn't risk that. Not when the stronghold that Donnie had worked so hard to build all around him had finally come crumbling down, even if only for a moment.
It was the first time since the incident that Donatello had actually shared something about his time spent with his captors and it brought his three brothers newfound hope that they were finally getting through to their troubled sibling. Of course, at the same time, what Donnie had just revealed had instantly infuriated all three of his brothers.
Not surprisingly, Raph had taken the disclosure the worst. He looked as though he was about to burst into flames.
Hearing Donnie say that Tiger Claw had threatened to beat him within an inch of his life made the hotheaded turtle's chest burn with uncontrollable rage. He had to clench his teeth to bite back a roar. Raphael had seen the horrific injuries those monsters had inflicted upon his little brother, so he was more than aware that Donnie had been put through torture that night. But somehow actually hearing Donatello say it out loud made it seem so much worse. Just the thought of Tiger Claw and that mutant bear brutally beating his quiet and passive brother was hard enough to stomach as it was. Listening to Donnie put the torment he had gone through into words was agonizing.
As he watched his younger brother struggle just to look them in the eyes anymore, Raph once again mentally cussed himself out for letting Shredder's good-for-nothing goons walk away after what they had done. Granted, neither one of them had left that warehouse totally unscathed, but at least they had been able to walk, or rather stagger, away. Those jerks hadn't shown Donnie the same courtesy.
The mere memory of his brainiac brother lying there lifeless on that rooftop nearly sent Raph over the edge.
There was no mistaking that the red-masked turtle was beside himself with anger.
Leonardo cast a foreboding glance in Raph's direction, as if to wordlessly tell his belligerent brother to curb his temper or else.
The bundles of muscles in Raphael's neck were scrunched up so tight, they were bulging out and it looked as though he was going to tear something and perhaps internally decapitate himself, which Leo had never thought possible up until now.
Despite the fury now surging through him like a firestorm, Raph did an admirable job of keeping his emotions in check, but he didn't know how long he'd be able to hold all his indignation back. Especially if Donnie started to get into specifics about what had happened that night.
Although a part of Raphael wasn't sure if he could handle hearing any additional details about what Tiger Claw had done to his little brother, another part of him needed to know the truth. The latter part won.
"Was that before or after that creep stabbed you in the shoulder and busted your leg?" As Raph posed the question, his voice sounded almost calm and collected. Only a scant trace of his aggravation came through, which was quite the accomplishment for the resident hothead.
And they say I need anger management classes. Pfft! Obviously, I can manage my anger perfectly fine on my own.
There was a long pause that followed Raphael's question that swiftly stole away his confidence. He was afraid that his rather blunt inquiry had caused his withdrawn little brother to retreat right back into lockdown mode.
Then, Donnie stunned all three of his brothers by answering the question without any further prying.
"After. It was actually Grizzgore that stabbed me in the shoulder when I tried to fight back at the junkyard. And then, Tiger Claw . . . h – he broke my leg when I tried to fight back at the warehouse. I, uh, guess you could say it was a team effort."
Even though the content of Donatello's response was utterly disturbing, the sarcasm in what the genius turtle had said came as an unexpected breath of fresh air. Donnie just wasn't Donnie without the sarcasm. It was good to hear it back in his repertoire.
"You didn't go poking the bear with your stick, did you?"
This question made Donnie's face turn down into a slight pout. Even his most reckless and careless brother knew better than to poke a bear with a stick.
Apparently, my brain never got the memo . . .
"Yeah, I just had to go and prove the old expression to be true. Unfortunately, Grizzgore had no qualms about poking a turtle with a stick. I believe the moral of the story here is, it's best not to fight back when you're outnumbered and facing two angry mutants more than twice your size."
"So how'd they transport you to the warehouse?" The answer to this question probably wasn't all that critical to the story, but at this point, Leo was just trying his darnedest to keep Donatello talking about his ordeal. The oldest turtle wanted to get as much information as possible out of Donnie just in case he decided to shut off the lines of communication once again.
"To tell you the truth, I – I don't really know. After Grizzgore beat the shell out of me and s – stabbed me with my own weapon, he – " Donnie had to stop mid-sentence in order to harness his unstable composure.
Leonardo could see his injured brother was struggling with the words. The blue-clad turtle reached forward and took one of Donnie's hands in his own, giving it a reassuring squeeze.
Closing his eyes for a moment, Donnie drew in a deep breath to steady himself before continuing. "He slammed my head against the ground until I started to lose consciousness. Tiger Claw was kind enough to stop Grizzgore from killing me, but only because he had orders to keep me alive. After that, Tiger Claw pulled my bo-staff out of my shoulder and I started bleeding out. That's the last thing I remember before coming to at the warehouse." As painful as it had been to relive that traumatizing memory, Donatello was impressed that he had somehow managed to get all that off his chest without a single sob.
A low growl rattled around in the back of Raphael's throat and Leonardo was quick to flash his volatile brother another foreboding look.
Letting out a spiteful grunt, Raph spun around and took to pacing laps around Donnie's cramped room.
With Raph's temper momentarily contained, Leo attempted to keep the story rolling. "Is that when you made your T-phone self-destruct?"
Anxiously gnawing on the inside of his bottom lip, Donnie tried to ignore the uneasy feeling wading in the pit of his gut. He knew precisely what his oldest brother was doing. Always tactical Leo was strategically prodding him for more information as a means of keeping him talking, but Donnie felt as though he had shared quite enough for one evening.
Or maybe it's morning . . .
After all that had transpired, the genius turtle wasn't even sure what time it was at this point.
Donnie looked up at Leo, purposely widening his reddish-brown eyes to their fullest extent, hoping the big, adorable eyes gambit might hypnotize his big brother into following his every command. Or perhaps more realistically, the sad puppy look might appeal to the oldest turtle's sense of pity and make him decide to wave the question off.
The plan could have worked if it weren't for Donnie's easily guilted conscience. The second he saw the worried expression on Leonardo's face, Donatello felt obligated to answer the query, convinced that not responding would be right on par with lying.
Stupid Leo and his stupid mind control tricks! Sometimes I swear he's figured out a way to get inside our heads.
Donnie sighed inwardly before responding.
"No . . . When I woke up, I was kind of out of it and I didn't even notice my T-phone was gone. After things started to come back into focus, I realized that I was tied up in the warehouse and there was no one in sight. I managed to get my legs untied and tried to get away, but that's when my T-phone went off and I found out I wasn't alone. Tiger Claw and Grizzgore jumped down from the catwalk above me and threatened that I . . . that I would never walk again if I didn't answer my phone. They wanted me to tell you guys I was fine and would be home soon . . . but I made the phone self-destruct instead."
"That's why that monster broke your leg?" Raph abruptly ceased his pacing about the room so he could stand beside his brothers again. The pacing was supposed to help calm his nerves, but it had done nothing of the sort. In fact, Donnie telling them that Shredder's mutants had told him that they would make it so he would never walk again had made the flames of Raph's rage burn even brighter than before. He was practically foaming at the mouth like a rabid dog.
Thankfully, Donnie was too distracted by the question to even notice that his immediate older brother was on the verge of boiling over.
"That's why that monster broke your leg?"
The genius turtle stared down at the heavy splint strapped to his shin and a chill crept up and down his spine. The memory was so lucid in his mind, he could still hear the nauseating cracking sounds and he swore the bones in his leg started to ache worse than they already were. He now understood why he had worked so hard to block these memories out and keep them from his brothers. He didn't want to go through this all over again. He didn't want to think about the awful things that had happened. Those memories were the reason for his ceaseless nightmares. Those memories were the reason that everything was falling apart. Those memories were the reason he was broken beyond repair.
His hands began to tremble when Tiger Claw's raspy voice resounded inside his head . . .
"Since you're supposedly the intelligent one, I probably don't need to tell you what a grave mistake you just made."
Donnie started to feel the throes of another panic attack coming on, but Leo's pacifying voice stopped it cold.
"So you risked them permanently crippling you to protect us?" Just wanting to comfort his hurting brother, Leonardo once again cupped a hand against the side of Donnie's face. The leader tried to be as gentle as possible so as not to evoke any more bad memories, but it still wasn't gentle enough.
As if on cue, Donnie's mood shifted and he went from sad and gloomy to manic and unhinged in less than a split-second.
"But I didn't protect you! I put your lives in danger because I'm always screwing everything up! I'm nothing but a failure!" The tone of Donnie's voice took on a shrieky quality, the way it always did when he was all worked up about something.
The sudden change in Donatello's temperament made Leonardo quickly pull his hand away as his heart began racing about a thousand miles a minute. Donnie was in such a fragile state right now, if he were to emotionally shut down at this point, they may never get him to open up again. Leo couldn't risk Donnie slipping further into his depression. The leader was scared to death of what dire consequences that would have.
A similar feeling of dread had snaked its way around Michelangelo's heart. Knowing his brainy brother as well as he did, Mikey was afraid that Donnie may get some crazy notion about bolting out of the room and locking himself up inside his lab. Mikey knew that the last thing his wounded brother needed right now was to be alone. It would only make things worse. And so, the youngest turtle pulled his arms tighter around Donnie's plastron, holding onto him with all his might. He wasn't about to let his big brother go. Not until he was feeling better about himself.
"That's not true, D! Stop talking like that, bro!"
Leo was the next one to try to convince his genius brother that what he had said simply wasn't true, but he didn't get very far.
"Donnie, you are anything but a failure. Why would you – "
"I am a failure, Leo! I let myself get captured! Because of me, you guys could've been killed trying to rescue me! I didn't want you guys to come after me! If there was any – " Donnie would have continued, but Leonardo was quick to pay him back for interrupting him.
"No, Donnie! This has to stop, now! None of this is your fault in any way, shape, or form, so don't you dare feel guilty for what happened! You left the lair that night because of my actions and I take full responsibility for everything. You almost died because of me, and for that, I will never forgive myself. Not only did I strike you in anger, but I made you feel like you weren't good enough. Even worse . . . like you weren't wanted. I hurt you and I pushed you past your limits. And I didn't even notice until it was too late. You had every right to run off. What I did was unforgivable, Donatello, and I don't deserve your forgiveness for all the inexcusable things that I've done to you. But I promise you I will spend the rest of my days trying to make it up to you in some way. I am so sorry, Donnie." There was no denying the sincerity in Leonardo's tone. The tears pooling in his eyes confirmed as much.
"B – But I – "
This time, it was Raphael's turn to interrupt Donatello before he could finish his argument.
"No buts, Donnie! Fearless is right about none of this being your fault. What he isn't right about is him being the only one responsible for all this. I was just as much to blame. I hate myself for hurting you, Donnie. I'd do anything to take it back . . . and I'd do anything to make you feel safe and happy again. I swear I would. I'm sorry for hurting you. And I'm sorry for making you feel weak and unimportant, because you're not either of those things, little brother. You never have been." Raph's voice cracked no less than three times while he made his uncharacteristically heartfelt apology, but he didn't pay any attention to his rare display of weakness, instead keeping his focus fixed on his injured brother. The hotheaded turtle then reached forward and clasped one hand around Donnie's good shoulder, but he deliberately kept his other hand free for the back of Mikey's head. If his baby brother dared to comment on anything he had just said or done, Raph was all set to slap him for it.
Donnie's gaze shifted back and forth between his two older brothers and he could readily see the apprehension written across both of their faces. Leonardo made no attempt to hide his concern, but Raph was doing his best to keep up his tough guy appearance. As always, Donatello could see right through his temperamental brother's façade. Being the most perceptive one, the genius turtle never had any trouble reading Raphael like a book.
If Donnie wasn't so utterly miserable, he might have smiled over his own cleverness. Instead, he looked like he was fighting tooth and nail not to cry, which did not go unnoticed by his brothers. They could see the fresh wave of tears starting to shimmer in Donatello's sorrowful eyes.
"Tell us something, Donnie. What made you decide to destroy your T-phone, knowing that if you did, Tiger Claw and Grizzgore would make you suffer for it?" Leo asked, confident he knew what the answer would be.
Trying to figure out where Leo could possibly be going with his line of questioning, Donnie creased his forehead in thought for a brief moment before offering a response.
"I . . . I couldn't let them gain access to the GPS log in the phone and potentially discover the location of the lair. That would've put Master Splinter and April in danger. I didn't want to put you guys in harm's way. Believe me I didn't! But I had to protect Sensei and April. I'm sorry." Clearly ashamed of what he had done, Donnie's eyes traveled back down to the cot, once again eluding his brothers' stares. In his haste to avoid eye contact, he failed to see all three of his brothers look at each other knowingly.
"You see, Donnie? That's why you're the best one out of all of us. Even after all the cruel things we had said and done to you, you still risked never being able to walk again just to protect our home and our family, but yet, you're sitting here apologizing because you didn't want us to risk our lives for you. You're selfless, Donnie. You always have been. You never put yourself first. Ever! And despite what you seem to think, you're definitely not a screw-up or a failure." As reassuring as Leonardo's words had been, they had still fallen on deaf ear slits.
"Oh, would you please stop trying to pretend like there's nothing wrong with me and that everything's gonna be A-okay! Because it's not, Leo! If this would've happened to any of you, you would've bounced back by now. You wouldn't be hearing voices in your head constantly telling you how pathetic you are, repeating every single little insult and criticism, over and over again. 'Shut up, Brainiac! Nobody wants to hear it! You're supposed to be the smart one. What the shell were you thinking? You know you're not the strongest fighter out of all of us.' Oh, and my personal favorite! 'If you can't handle yourself around one Foot Soldier, then . . . '"
Donnie paused for both breath and dramatic effect before continuing.
"But wait, there's more! 'It was a stupid move, Donatello. You let him take you out! I can't babysit you all of the time! You're way too weak to get up! All this time we were waiting around for you to fix things, we could have been doing it ourselves . . . '" Donnie could have probably gone on for another half hour or more with all the negative quotes he had heard ringing in his head for weeks, but he gathered by his brothers' collective gasps that he had gotten his point across. There was no need to continue.
Postures slouching with the heaviest of remorse, Leo and Raph both shook their heads in denial. Their own harsh comments being thrown back at them cut like the sharpest of swords. Hearing Donnie repeat what they had said word for word was nothing shy of mortifying. The way he recited the lines –
It was as though he had heard the words hundreds of times.
What frightened Leo half out of his mind was the horrible realization that Donnie most likely had heard those words hundreds of times, playing in his head like a broken record. Donatello and his photographic memory had taken them straight to heart. All this time, those hurtful words had been tormenting him, hindering his recovery. They had been pulling him further and further down into the very same dark place that his brothers had been trying so hard to pull him out of. Even more disturbing was the fact that those words had come straight from his own brothers' mouths.
Leonardo continued to shake his head from side to side, now knowing that his 'constructive' criticism had done all of this to Donatello.
What kind of brother am I?
Leo once again reached a hand out to his distraught brother, trying to console him.
"I'm so sorry, Donnie. We should've never said – "
"No! You don't understand!" Just as Leonardo's fingers made contact with Donatello's skin, the genius turtle batted the hand away as though it was a weapon coming at him, while at the same time, attempting to shrug Raph's hand off his shoulder. He hadn't done these things out of anger, but out of fear of being hurt again. In Donnie's mind, pushing everyone away had become the only way to avoid more pain.
Emitting a sad little whimper, Donnie tried to curl himself back up into a ball, but Leo grabbed a hold of one arm while Raph grabbed onto the other to stop their younger brother from hiding. The two oldest turtles weren't willing to let Donatello shut them out anymore.
Eyes brimming with tears that were about to spill over, Leo practically begged for answers. "Then help us understand, Donnie!"
"How can you possibly even begin to understand? You don't know what it's like to hear voices inside your head constantly telling you that you're . . . you're a worthless burden. That everyone would be better off without you. You don't know how it feels to be so lost, there's no hope of ever being found. To be afraid to go sleep, because every time you close your eyes the nightmares will be there . . . waiting for you. They're always there. Always . . . Always there to take me away." With each gut-wrenching word Donnie spoke, his voice faded into all but nothingness. The last few words were just barely audible breaths passing from his lips. Several sloppy tears escaped his red, puffy eyes and rolled down his sunken cheeks, clinging to his jawline before plummeting onto his legs.
Finally, Leonardo understood.
Finally, he knew just what Donatello was so afraid of.
"They're not going to take you away, Donnie. Not ever. We won't let them." Before he even finished his promise, Leo had already wrapped his arms around Donnie's shoulders, making sure not to put too much pressure on his second youngest brother's injuries. Leo also made sure he didn't accidentally hit Mikey, who was still clinging onto Donnie from behind.
Once inside of his oldest brother's muscular embrace, Donnie's whole body started to shudder from the overexertion of attempting to hold back his emotions.
"I'm s – so scared . . . they're gonna c – come for m – me. I'm – I'm scared those two m – monsters are gonna hurt me again."
Trying not to jar Donnie too much, Leonardo internalized a cringe over his brother's wording choice. The leader knew that the 'two monsters' Donatello had been referring to were Tiger Claw and Grizzgore, but he could've just as soon said the same thing about his two older brothers.
They had hurt him just as badly . . .
Leonardo was about to apologize again when Donnie peered up at him with a devastated expression that cried out for his big brother to help him. Apology temporarily forgotten, Leo stared into his little brother's tragic eyes, wanting desperately to slay the inner demons haunting him.
"Tiger Claw told m – me that I would never see you guys again. And if I didn't serve Shredder, I would – I would be brutally t – tortured and killed. His and Grizzgore's orders . . . they were to permanently separate me . . . f – from all of you. They were planning on taking me someplace overseas where you would n – never be able to find me and I . . . I lost all hope of ever seeing you again. I was so sure I would spend the rest of my life imprisoned and alone. And the worst part was knowing that the last few m – moments I spent with the three of you were . . . they were filled with so much hurt and anger . . . and I'd never be able to take back what I had said or done. I was so scared that you guys would never find me. I thought . . . I thought I had lost you forever." Through sheer willpower alone, Donnie somehow forced himself not to fall apart, but he could feel his grip on his self-control dwindling away. His defenses were weakening faster than he could build them back up.
"Donnie, we would never stop looking. There is no place they could take you that we wouldn't find you. We would go to the very ends of this world to get you back," Leonardo vowed with every last ounce of conviction he had. He then watched his genius brother lose the battle to stop himself from crying.
Seeing Donatello so broken and dejected made Leo start to cry as well. Fighting through his own tears, Leonardo pulled Donnie closer to him. At first, the genius turtle stiffened in his big brother's grasp, but he soon relaxed and nestled his head against Leonardo's shoulder.
That's when all of Donnie's walls finally came crashing down and he began to sob uncontrollably in the safety of Leo's arms.
"I don't want to be afraid anymore," Donnie wailed, barely coherent through the bone rattling sobs. He buried his face deeper into Leo's shoulder, using his brother as support and as a facial tissue, but the oldest turtle didn't mind one little bit.
Somehow, through the tangled mess of limbs, Raph managed to climb up on the overcrowded bed and join the group hug. He gently rested a hand on Donnie's uninjured side as he spoke in a firm yet compassionate tone.
"You don't have to be afraid, Donnie, because I'm not gonna let the Shredder or any of his lowlife maggots get anywhere near you again. I'd die before I let anything like this ever happen to you again, little brother."
"And you know I got your back, bro," Mikey chimed in before realizing just how foolish that must have sounded when he was presently adhered to Donnie's back like a leech. "Well, I mean I'm obviously holding onto your back right now . . . But I meant that I had your back, like fingeratively."
Donnie was too choked up to correct his baby brother, but Raph wasn't.
"That's figuratively, you halfwit!" The teasing tone of Raphael's voice lightened the mood, but only for a fleeting moment. Less than a second later, his voice took on a far more serious quality as he expanded off Mikey's original comment. "We've all got your back, Donnie. We'll protect you no matter what. There's nothing to be afraid of anymore."
"But I . . . I can't let you risk your lives for me," Donnie mumbled into Leo's shoulder. The brothers weren't sure if the genius turtle was keeping his head down because he was trying to hide from them, or if it was because he was that exhausted. Either way, all three of his brothers thought it was cute to hear Donnie's small, muffled voice. He sounded like sleepy little kid.
"You don't have a choice, Brainiac! We're gonna protect you whether you like it or not. You're stuck with us."
Now, it was Mikey's turn to expand on Raph's comment.
"Yeah! You're our bro and that's what bros do, dude. We protect each other. We love you, D."
Donnie just whimpered in response, snuggling against Leo. He was so tired at this point he could hardly keep his eyes open.
Leo snuggled back, feeling his second youngest brother's weight leaning heavier into him as he spoke.
"Don't you realize what an important part of this family you are, Donnie? When one of us is hurt or sick, who takes care of us? When we're up against the enemy, whose brilliant mind can we always count on to get us out of there safely? When Raph and I can't see eye to eye – "
"Which is always," Raph interjected, but Leo didn't miss a beat and kept right on with his motivational speech.
"– Who keeps us from killing one another? When we break everything in the lair, who's always there to fix it? When we need help with just about anything, who do we go to? It's you, Donnie." A thin smile crept across Leo's face when he heard the sound of Donnie sniffling. The older turtle then patted his brother's back comfortingly, as if to gesture 'there, there.'
"In case you hadn't noticed, you're a genius, Donnie. And you're an amazing fighter, too. I know that you're worried about not being as physically strong as the rest of us, but fighting isn't just about physical strength. Your special skills have saved us far more times than brute strength ever has, which in my book, makes you the strongest fighter of us all. What's more, is your heart is as true and as big as they come, which makes you far stronger than you think. And there's no doubt of your bravery. You willingly sacrifice yourself time and time again to protect us." The haunting memory of what had happened on the warehouse rooftop caused Leo's voice to give out on him, but only few moments of silence passed before Raph picked up right where his older brother had left off.
"What Leo's trying to say is we messed up, big time. We took you for granted, Donnie. We said and did things that hurt you when we should've been thanking you for all that you do. Thanks, little brother." There was an expression of immense gratitude on the red-masked turtle's face that he knew his brother couldn't actually see from his current vantage point, but Raph continued to wear the expression regardless as he continued on. "And I know we don't tell you this nearly enough, Donnie, but we'd be totally lost without you. When you were hurt and in that coma, we just about fell apart."
Not wanting to be outdone by his normally least inspiring brother, Leo finally managed to find his voice again.
"That's because you're the glue that holds this family together, Donnie. You're always taking care of us, even when we're being a bunch of selfish jerks. You keep us whole and you do everything in your power to make sure we're safe. You know, you've told us before that all you've ever needed out of life is to be with us, but I think it's the other way around, Donnie. We need you more than you will ever know."
"What Leo and I did – it was wrong and we're sorry for hurting you, little brother. I know we can't change the past. I wish like shell we could. But we promise we're gonna be better brothers from now on."
"The kind of brothers you deserve, Donatello. Because there's no way we could ever make it without you."
In his mind, Donnie had formed a properly structured, compound sentence in response, complete with nouns, verbs, adjectives, adverbs, as well as a modifier and even a conjunction, but what ultimately came out of his mouth was a couple of nonsense syllables that when put together sounded like "ubgah."
"We love you, too, Brainiac. But whatta ya say you lay off anymore hairbrained stunts, like taking on four Foot-bots with a broken leg, a bad shoulder, a homemade bomb, a kama, a crutch, and a coconut. At least until you're feeling a little better, okay? Besides, reckless, crazy acts of violence are supposed to be my thing," Raph quipped, playfully rubbing the top of his genius brother's bald head.
Donnie hummed in content, and then, suddenly went limp in Leonardo's arms, passing out from a combination of utter exhaustion and pain medication, unbeknownst to anyone but the eldest turtle.
"A coconut? I didn't know you even liked coconut, D." Mikey scratched his head, visibly confused.
Raph was about to rudely respond when Leo held a finger up to his lips and shushed his red-banded brother, signaling that Donnie had gone to sleep. The three awake brothers exchanged warm smiles while they ever-so carefully shifted their positions so that they could lower Donnie down onto the bed.
Not about to leave their genius brother's side, Leo, Raph, and Mikey curled up next to Donatello, getting as comfortable as they could. It had been years since they had all slept together in the same bed. They didn't remember the bed being quite so small, but it hardly mattered.
"What I want is to be with my family . . . "
That's what Donnie had always said.
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To be continued . . .
*Author's Notes: Awww! Turtle piles are one of my biggest weaknesses. The brothers cuddling together on the bed is quite possibly my very favorite moment in the whole story. Donnie needed this so much.
Sadly, there are only a few more posts left to go in this story, but I've still got a couple more surprises up my sleeve. I'm super excited to share the next chapter with everyone. It's a really special one. C=
If you're reading this story and enjoying it, please take a moment to let me know by voting and/or commenting. I would appreciate it very, very much. Thank you all for reading.
CJ😉
*Special Notes: Thank you so much to everyone who voted and/or commented on 'TMNT Shell Shots' last week. It really meant a lot to me.
Oh, and the new chapter of 'Freak Show' is coming out soon . . . 😁