*Trigger Warning - Sexual Assault*
It had been a few hours since we had arrived and it was actually going pretty well so far. I was a little drunk, but I really didn't want to feel too vulnerable in such a crowded area.
Blake had left me with Paige, Liam, Axell, and Jared about half an hour ago, going over to speak to his own friends. Paige and Liam were far too preoccupied by each other, the alcohol obviously boosting their confidence, while Toby and Kira were no where in site. Axell was extremely drunk and hitting on every girl he laid eyes on, so that left Jared and I the only ones left that were still somewhat sober.
Honestly, from the moment Blake left us it was only really Jared and I. We'd been talking this whole time, but I could see behind Jared's facade and his usually deep, blue eyes are clouded over. He was drunk, but I still seemed comfortable and safe with him. He didn't show it like the others, so I just assumed that he wasn't as bad as the others despite drinking as much.
As we talk someone hits me from behind. I stumble a little, but my drink goes over me. I squeal in shock as the cool liquid covers the end of my dress and my legs, quickly getting sticky on my skin. "Oh god," Jared mumbles, growling off the boy who hit me. "Come on, lets find you a bathroom to get you cleaned up."
I nod in agreement and follow behind him as he heads to the stairs. It was already quieter by the time we reached the top of the stairs, the pounding music now a dull, repetitive thudding. We walk down the hall and Jared peaks his head into some of the rooms until he finds me a bathroom. "Thank you," I smile, stepping in as he held the door open for me.
I don't really pay attention to what's happening behind me as I scramble to grab some tissue paper, wiping my legs and dress, trying desperately to dry my dress. I hear the door click behind me and furrow my eyebrows, turning to find Jared leaning against the now closed door.
I throw the paper in the toilet and stand up straight, feeling slightly uncomfortable. "I'm good now, thanks," I mumble, nodding awkwardly. "Uh, we should... we should get back before they start wondering where we went."
"Oh, they'll be fine without us for a while," Jared spoke, his words obviously slurred. I could hear it now, in the quiet. I could see his face and his eyes properly in this light and only now did I realize how drunk he was. He took a step closer, and instinctively I took a step back.
"I really want to leave," I mumble, my voice shakier this time. He doesn't stop walking towards me until I'm pressed to the wall with no where to escape.
He grins at me, his hands placing themselves on my hips. I shudder, trying to squirm from his grip, but he only holds on tighter. "I like you," he slurs, the smell of whiskey on his breath as he spoke. "Let's have some fun."
His hand starts sliding downwards, gripping my bum roughly. "I-I said I d-didn't want to!" I cried out, shoving him back. Normally my size wouldn't compare to his, but, because of his drunken state, he lost his balance and stumbled backwards. I made a break towards the door, opening it before being grabbed by the waist, the strength heaving my backwards. I hold onto the door frame, my knuckles turning white as I fight him. "Stop, please!" I scream, thrashing my legs in an attempt to escape.
"Come on, Zoey, you know you'd rather be in here with me," he growled, his fingers digging into my hips. I squeak in pain, releasing the door frame in shock. I'm thrust into the bathroom again, my back hitting the wall. He turns to me, a malice smirk on his lips. "That's bett-" Jared is cut off mid sentence, because, while speaking he was closing the door, but the door swung open again, great force behind it as it bounced off the wall.
"Don't you dare fucking touch her, you sick bastard," the voice growled, and before I knew it, Jared was falling to the floor in a heap. I look up and see Blake staring at me, his knuckles bright red with a small cut on from punching Jared. He started to get back up, but Toby was only a second behind Blake, now kicking him repeatedly. "Come on," Blake demands.
I was frozen in place. I watched a new side to Toby, a side that I always knew was there but never witnessed myself. I also saw the anger and hurt in Blake's eyes when he looked at me. The thoughts of 'what if they hadn't come in time' ran through my head. I physically couldn't move, and Blake saw this, moving into the bathroom to scoop me into his arms. The moment he cradled me to his chest was the moment I broke.
I threw my arms around his neck and buried my face into his shoulder, sobbing uncontrollably. I briefly saw Liam and Paige's faces as Blake carried me through the house and to the front door. They had only met Toby's friends today and now they got to watch him beat the daylights out of one of them.
We soon reached outside and that's when I think the shock sunk in because that's when I freaked out. "Put me down!" I screamed, wriggling to try and free myself from Blake's grip. Just the touch of his hand freaked me out. "Right now!" I demand, tears streaming down my face.
Blake obeyed, but left his hands on my shoulder, holding me to look at him. "Green, it's me," he mumbles, his voice soft and raspy. He'd only had one or two, and that I could trust, because, he may be the bad boy who can party, but he was my ride home and he made it clear that my safety comes before anything else. "Please, calm down. It's me, Dixon, I'm not going to hurt you."
I take rapid breaths, my heart pounding a million miles an hour as what actually happened processed in my brain. "Blake?" I whisper, my eyes blurry from the tears. I heard a sigh of relief escape his lips when I said his name, and he pulled me into a hug that I accepted.
"What the hell happened?" He asked me after a few moments, pushing me back to arms length as he examined me. I had no doubt that under my dress there were going to be bruises from the grip Jared had on me. "I thought I told you to stay in the kitchen?"
My eyes widen, my breath hitching in my chest. I take a step away from him, my tears welling in my eyes once again. "Y-you think t-this i-is my-" I choke out, taking another step away.
His eyes widen, mimicking mine as he realizes what he said. "Oh, of course not!" He paics, stepping towards me.
I take another step back, holding my hand out to tell him to stop. "Don't-" I choke. "Don't come near me." My chest aches, knowing that Blake thinks this is my fault. "This is n-not my fault," I whisper, rubbing my forehead with the heel of my hand, looking around desperately for anyway to just escape and go home.
"No, it isn't," Blake says softly, simply watching me. "I just wish you would have trusted me when I told you that I didn't like him."
"You never said that!" I snap, my head whipping back to look at him. "You thought we were dating and that was the only reason you didn't like him. N-not once did you say you didn't trust him!" The tears start falling down my cheeks again. "This is NOT my fault," I cry out, falling to the ground.
I cry into my hands, my sobs now uncontrollable. Blake waited a few moments before sitting next to me. "Look up," he whispers, not touching me, but sitting close enough that I know he's right next to me. I don't listen to him, continuing to cry harshly into my hands. "Look up," he repeats, this time a little harder.
I try and control myself a little, wiping my tears away before doing as I'm told and looking up. I calm down, simply watching the stars in the dark night, ignoring the chaos behind us and enjoying the view. "Just remember," Blake mumbles, catching my attention. I look at him to find him already looking at me, continuing, "the stars will forever be there when you need some help."
I frown a little but look away, looking up at the sky again. The twinkling stars of the night look down on me, providing me with comfort. I lay my head on his shoulder wearily, but I'm greeted with warmth and familiarity. It's in that moment that I realize, "and so will you." My voice was barely above a whisper but Blake heard me, nodding his head. Despite everything around us, this moment were like the others we had experienced at the lake. The stars staring down on us, listening to our conversation, providing that familiar and comforting feeling.
"Let's get you home," Blake whispers, starting to stand. I watch sadly, not wanting to go home right now. Not after tonight. I take Blake's hand, allowing him to help me off of the ground. He stared at me for a moment, studying my features. "Where then?" Blake asks, as if reading my mind about not wanting to go home. I smile sadly, my features soft. He simply nods and we both leave in silence, the decision made.
***
We sat on the edge of the lake, myself leaning down and playing with the water with my hand, the ripples distorting my reflection, hiding my red eyes from myself. Blake sat next to me, simply watching me, letting me have my space.
We had been here for almost an hour and not a single word has been spoken since we left the party. I look up, my eyes meeting Blake's green ones. Something was different and I really didn't like it. His normally glowing, emerald eyes were now dark, sorrow swimming around in them. His body was slumped and his eyes had developed black bags.
I say nothing as I remove my hand from the water, my eyes never leaving Blakes. I crawl over to him quietly, placing myself directly in front of him, sitting on my knees. "Speak to me," I whisper, searching his face.
A flash of hurt travels through his eyes, but soon disappears and returns back to sadness. "I don't want to talk," he whispers back. It felt like if either of us raised our voices then someone would hear our secrets. "I just want-" he trails off, looking me over. There was no way he could hide it; his eyes flickered from my eyes and to my lips, before he turned his head away to look at the lake again, our bodies still facing each other.
"I trust you," I whisper, gaining his attention again. I smile softly at him, showing him how vulnerable I felt telling him that, showing him that it was the truth.
"Why?" He asks, his voice shaky. I tilt my head a little, chewing my lip as my heart pangs a little.
"I will never know why, but I know that I do," I reply honestly. He looked satisfied with my answer, a sad smile gracing his lips.
He leans forward, gently placing his hands on my waist. I wince, causing Blake to retreat his hands. I smile sadly, urging him to try again. He reaches forward again, a frown gracing his lips as his fingers gently trace where he hand tried to hold onto. He tugs gently at my dress, stretching it down so that the lace panel on my waist is low enough to see the already dark bruises forming on my skin. "I'll kill him," he mutters quietly, tracing the bruises, realizing they actually in the shape and position of fingers holding on tightly.
He sighs sadly, placing his hands lower on my waist, almost at my hips. He waist a moment, looking at me. I stare back, knowing he's waiting to see if there's more pain in the new position his hands are at. After a moment of silence between us, he starts to pull me closer. His hands held me like a feather, scared I'll break as he pulled me towards him slowly, obviously not wanting to scare me.
I would be lying if I said I wasn't nervous, especially after what happened an hour ago. I chew my lower lip, and Blake saw this. He slowed his actions more. "You're nervous," he mumbles, his voice breathy. I nod. "Should I stop?" I could hear the worry in his voice and I couldn't help but melt at how sweet this bad boy was. I shake my head. No.
He continues to pull me close until I'm sat between his legs. We both simply stare at each other for a long time, getting used to the closeness of the situation. Blake reaches his hand up, brushing my hair out of my face, tucking it behind my ear. He then gently runs both of his thumbs over my cheeks, frowning a little. I look down, knowing I look horrible from the amount of crying I had done today. Blake captures my chin tentatively, pulling my face up to his again. "Don't you dare hide from me," he whispers, his voice so soft. He looked truly broken. "Don't you dare," he repeated, rubbing my cheek again.
It felt like everything outside didn't exist anymore, like it always did here. But this time it wasn't this place, it was this moment. I realized that it was Blake that made everything disappear, even the big things like what happened tonight. I was safe, comfortable, and happy with Blake.