A/N: Okay, so quick note: I am not claiming that what's written in this one-shot really happened. This is my interpretation of events and it's FICTION. Also: the trial never happened in this one-shot. Also: have fun reading!
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Cause in my head, in my head, I do everything right
When you call I'll forgive and not fight
All the moments I play in the dark
Wild and fluorescent, come home to my heart
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August 7th, 2017
318 days After Karlie
There were a lot of things Taylor Swift was good at. For starters, she was a proficient songwriter. She was an expert at putting just the right amount of sass in business emails. She was a good guitarist. She rarely lost a game of scrabble. She was able to guess the brand of cat food just by smelling it. She was excellent at pausing the microwave one second early. And lastly, she was very good at getting over people.
Karlie always said the last thing wasn't something to be proud of. She thought it indicated a certain emotional distance, a past trauma that made it impossible for Taylor to fully immerse herself into a relationship. Taylor hated it when Karlie talked about her like that. There was nothing wrong with her. Just not everyone was as bold and impetuous as Karlie. Some people actually liked to be in control of their lives.
Karlie would be pleased if she knew that Taylor wasn't as good at getting over people as she liked to believe. Quite the opposite, actually. Once she allowed herself to feel something, she felt everything. There was no grey area when it came to love—at least not for her. And when she fell in love with Karlie, she decided that certain people were just worth the broken heart.
(That wasn't true. No one was worth a broken heart. Not even Karlie Kloss.)
Karlie stumbled into Taylor's life exactly 1363 days prior to today. (It took Taylor three weeks to fall for her, which meant that she had been in love with Karlie for 1342 days.) There was some literal stumbling: Karlie burst into Taylor's dressing room in a glittery bodysuit, plopped down on the couch with surprisingly little elegance for a Victoria's Secret Angel, realized she wasn't in her own dressing room, jumped up, shouted an apology, and tripped over a chair. Taylor caught her by her elbow before she could fall face first on the floor and Karlie's body slumped against hers.
In hindsight, it was the perfect cliche romantic comedy meeting.
Only after Karlie had regained her balance, she looked at Taylor and blurted, "Oh my God, you're Taylor Swift."
And Taylor had been so fucking flustered that the only response she could think of was, "Oh my God, you're... hot."
(It was quite unpoetic for an award winning songwriter, but nevertheless a good icebreaker. Karlie laughed hysterically.)
Karlie Kloss was a hurricane in every sense. Her walk, her piercing stare, the way she said Taylor's name—it was all so intense and exhilarating and Taylor felt like she was constantly catching her breath. The world was just so fundamentally different in Karlie's presence. Unlike most other things, Karlie was completely unpredictable—Taylor couldn't plan her, and for someone who liked planning so much, this was terrible. Every day with Karlie was an uncertainty, both because of her whirlwind personality and because of the fragility of their relationship. It was terrifying. Taylor never expected she would miss it so much.
It had been 318 days since she had last seen Karlie. Two weeks after their break up, she moved to London. It was supposed to be a fresh start (that was what everyone kept calling it anyway) but it didn't seem 'fresh' at all, it just made her feel weirdly out of touch with everything. She barely saw her family and friends anymore and she hadn't talked to her fans in months. For the first time in years, there was a real distance between her and her public persona. And sure, it was a relief to be free from the pressure that came with being a successful musician, but it also made her feel empty somehow. And it gave her a lot of spare time to think about Karlie, which was definitely bad.
Their first kiss had been in the hallway of Taylor's New York City apartment, one month after their first meeting. It was one of Taylor's most treasured and now, most haunting memories. Karlie was the one who took the initiative—as always. That night, they made dinner together and Taylor was a nervous wreck because she had to acknowledge that her feelings for Karlie had become too strong to ignore. Karlie, of course, was way ahead of her and tried to get her to admit it, but Taylor was still completely oblivious that Karlie felt the same. So when they said their goodbyes and Karlie asked if she was okay 'because she had been so on edge tonight', Taylor started stuttering incoherently that maybe, possibly, she liked Karlie a little more than she should. Halfway through her confession, Karlie cut Taylor off by saying, "Me too."
"What?" Taylor had asked, completely perplexed.
"I like you, too."
"Are you sure?"
Karlie chuckled. "Positive."
Their first kiss was chaste and cautious and Taylor's heart ached whenever she thought about it because never before had it felt so right with someone. And it had continued to feel right, although they had to wrestle their way through the occasional bump in the road. They survived the highly publicized 1989 release, the concert debacle, the rumors, the tour, the fake boyfriends. It was a lot to take for the both of them and there had been moments that their relationship was hanging on by a thread, but they always worked it out one way or another. Ironically, it was right when Taylor started to believe the worst was behind them that Karlie had thrown in the towel.
It was right after Taylor's fake breakup with Tom. Fake breakups were almost as bad as real breakups because of the media storm that followed. After the news had reached the papers, Taylor stayed as far away from the media as she could. She was determined not to let the criticism affect her like it usually did. Life was looking good for her, after all. She was taking a break from the music and she had plenty of time to spend with Karlie. This had been the plan all along; when the success of 1989 would die down, Taylor would take a step back from the spotlight and use the time off to think of the best way to come out without it being too much of a scandal.
And that was how it would've played out if Karlie hadn't suddenly lost all hope. 2017 is set out to be my biggest year yet, career-wise, she had told Taylor. My schedule is going to be crazy so it will be difficult to make time for each other at all, let alone if we have to do it in hiding. You know you won't be able to come out anytime soon. There will be a new album—there will always be reasons not to come out. We have to be realistic, Taylor. Maybe it's just not the right time for us.
Taylor hadn't taken this very well. She had always thought Karlie was okay with the hiding and the not seeing each other. Karlie had always insisted that things would get easier and that it would all be worth it in the end. And of course Taylor could see the sense in Karlie's words, but she hadn't foreseen that she would just give up like that, right when she had been so ready to dive in and make Karlie her first priority.
Weirdly enough, it wasn't so much the getting dumped that was a bad memory as the hours afterward. The first thing she'd done was call her mom, not because she wanted to vent but because she thought her mom should know. Andrea had cried on the phone. I really thought you were gonna marry Karlie, she had tried to explain herself. She kept repeating how terrible this was for Taylor and I can't even imagine how you must feel and Taylor didn't feel a thing yet.
The feelings didn't come until later when she walked into her bedroom and saw traces of Karlie everywhere. Photos, clothes, her perfume, mascara stains on the pillow. It was all Karlie. For the past three years, it had only ever been Karlie.
She had also thought she was going to marry Karlie.
Something no one had told Taylor about breakups was that the good memories were always worse than the bad memories. She rarely thought about what Karlie had said to her before she left, or about the fights and the crying herself to sleep. It were the good memories that kept replaying themselves in her head like a supercut of their relationship. Their first meeting, their first kiss, introducing Karlie to her parents, the first time Karlie told her she loved her. Those two things happened within an hour of each other. Karlie had been so nervous about meeting her parents that she barely ate a thing during dinner, so Taylor offered to get Taco Bell on the way home and Karlie answered, "Oh God, yes, I love you."
Her petrified look told Taylor that she hadn't meant to blurt it out like that, but Taylor just smiled and said, "I love you, too." As if saying I love you was the easiest thing in the world. As if loving Karlie was the easiest thing in the world.
Sometimes, it had felt like that, like loving Karlie was the only thing that came naturally to her. But sometimes, when their world of lies collapsed on them, loving Karlie felt like the biggest burden Taylor had ever carried. And now it was over, it felt similar. There were times that Taylor was able to convince herself that breaking up had been for better, that she was moving on, that she was fine, and there were times that nothing just seemed quite right, like the world had turned into a dim version of what it once was.
Taylor had rented a house in northern London that was the exact opposite of her New York apartment. It was small and secluded and no one knew exactly where it was except for her family and friends. Meredith and Dibbles loved it. Taylor barely even saw Meredith anymore because the cat was always in the garden digging holes and chasing birds.
Very far away from her, there was a world where she was dating a guy. It was Tree's idea of preemptive damage control before the sixth album. This guy—Joe—was very nice and very gay (that last thing Taylor didn't know for sure but it was usually part of the whole PR thing—and it was pretty obvious in his case). She hated that another fake relationship was being added to her long list of ex-lovers, but at least she didn't have to parade this boyfriend around like the previous one.
It was all good, though. It was fine. She was fine. She could focus on her music, she could focus on herself, she could finally read the books that had been on her shelf for years. She was okay. She would be okay.
It was impossible to love someone like she loved Karlie and be completely unaffected when it was over. It had taken her some time to accept that, but she was getting there. Grief was inevitable when you lost something that special and just because she felt this terrible now didn't mean she would never get over it. She would love other people again. Maybe she would even love guys again.
But still. It had been 318 days. Taylor still dreamed about Karlie almost every night. She still checked Karlie's Instagram for updates like it was her religion. On August 3rd, she spent almost an hour on her phone with a birthday text ready, her fingers hovering over the 'send' button, only to decide not to send it. And sometimes, when she was having a really bad day, she would watch parts of the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show 2014 and think about how nervous she had been and how Karlie said all the right things and how beautiful Karlie looked in black lingerie and how even more beautiful she looked when that lingerie was on the dressing room floor.
She must have written at least 50 songs about Karlie by now. Most of them were too obvious and gender specific to ever be released on an album, but that made the songwriting all the more cathartic. The sixth album was ready and on its way, but there wouldn't be a lot of love songs on it. The album—reputation—was a combination of the Karlie-inspired songs that were ambiguous enough to put on there and power songs about—well, about not taking shit from anyone, if you will. It was probably her least personal album yet, but she was proud of it nonetheless. She was getting back out there. And this time, she was going to try her best to not turn into a media spectacle or a headline. All the focus was on the music and on the fans.
This new image and her break-up with the media were all planned with Karlie in mind. It's all about rebranding, Tree already told her in 2015 when rebranding seemed unnecessary (the world had finally embraced her again). You have to fully get rid of your reputation—the people have to know you're not America's sweetheart anymore.
Tree had been shocked, to say at least, when Taylor told her she and Karlie broke up. It was the first time she had seen her publicist cry and somehow, it felt like the ultimate defeat to see Tree cry out of all people. Naturally, Tree didn't care all that much about Karlie and Taylor personally, but it was harsh to see her hard work being flushed down the drain like that. Almost everything she had done for the past three years was so Taylor and Karlie could be together. And weirdly enough, the option that Taylor and Karlie might break up hadn't even occurred to her. Just like it hadn't occurred to Andrea, or Austin, or Abi, or any of Taylor's other friends. Everyone had thought Taylor would spend her life with Karlie. None of them except her mom had actually said so, but Taylor could tell from the way they reacted to the news. They had all embraced Karlie as someone who would be at the Christmas table for years— not just as some random girlfriend.
On this particular August night in northern London, the rain was pouring down and flooding every inch of Taylor's perfectly polished garden. (Gardening was another thing she had time for now.) She lived for nights like these. Her power was at its peak when she was sitting in a chair with a book, a cup of tea, and a cat on her lap. It was a strange feeling that everyone was still unaware of her impending return to the music industry. Two weeks from now, she would send the first clue about the single into the world and thereby officially start a new era. But right now, there was still nothing but the rain on the windows and Olivia's purring—and the occasional buzzing of her phone.
She mindlessly glanced at the lit up screen.
@karliekloss just posted a photo.
318 days after their break-up, Taylor still had Karlie's Instagram on notifications. And as if that wasn't pathetic enough already, her heart still skipped a beat when she saw it. This time, it were two candids of Karlie in her birthday outfit. She looked amazing, of course. Taylor had tried to talk herself into disliking the platinum hair, but she failed. Karlie could pull everything off.
After closing the Instagram app, Taylor skimmed over her texts. Mom, Dad, Austin, and Selena could wait. She did answer a music related question from Jack, and right when she wanted to put her phone down, she received a text from Ella.
there's a rumor that you co-wrote supercut w me and j
Taylor's stomach sunk.
Seriously? But you and Jack are the only ones credited as writers, right?
Her heart was beating in her throat while she awaited Ella's reply. How the hell did they figure out she co-wrote Supercut? The song was produced by Ella and Jack but most of the lyrics were Taylor's. It had been a very sad ballad that wasn't sonically compatible with the rest of reputation, and Ella had liked it so Taylor gave it to her. (Naturally, Ella had turned the song into something less depressing.)
Taylor's phone buzzed again and she picked it up with lightning speed.
yeah there's absolutely no proof you wrote on it. i just wanted to let you know because of the karlie situation. maybe you still have to be careful w these things, idk
Taylor exhaled in relief. She texted back. Thank you for thinking of me. I'm sure it will blow over.
She put the phone down and continued reading, but she couldn't keep her attention on the book. Karlie had definitely listened to Melodrama, she loved Ella's music. Naturally, she didn't know Supercut was written about her but it was a strange thought that she heard the lyrics. It was the first released song about Karlie after You Are In Love.
Karlie would probably listen to reputation too. She would know almost every single thought Taylor ever had about her. This wasn't exactly new, of course, Taylor had been releasing music for over a decade, but it felt different this time. It felt kind of like she was sending Karlie her diary entries—and she wasn't sure if she was ready for her to read them.
It was still raining when Taylor went to bed an hour later. Rain was really something she had learned to appreciate because of all the time spent in the UK. It used to bum her out but now she almost couldn't sleep without the ticking sound it made on the roof. It was probably the most soothing sound in the whole world. Except maybe the sound of Karlie's voice, but that was a corny thought to have 318 days after a break-up.
Taylor brushed her teeth and scolded Meredith for stepping on the white carpet with her muddy paws. The cat glared at Taylor and curled up in a ball on the left side of the bed. Dibbles tried to snuggle up against her sister, but she hastily moved a few inches to the left when Meredith hissed. Dibbles' continuous attempts to get Meredith's approval always made Taylor laugh. She remembered how Dibbles would always sleep with Meredith when she was a kitten, when Mer still (grudgingly) allowed it. Meredith had absolutely zero tolerance for Dibbles now. She had absolutely zero tolerance for anyone—with Karlie as an exception. Meredith had always been fond of Karlie.
The best thing about Taylor's new life was that 10 p.m. was an acceptable bedtime, just like getting up before 8 a.m. was acceptable, too. She loved it, sleeping ten hours a night and being up early enough to see the sunrise. It made her feel like she was in high school again (the getting up early part, not the ten hours sleep per night part).
At 9:45, she slid into her bed and started answering some messages and emails. She would be returning to America next week to prepare the single release and her schedule was already filled with business meetings and social gatherings. She didn't know if she was looking forward to it yet. It was going to be chaotic and exhausting, and it had been so long since she had to deal with chaos and exhaustion that she wasn't sure if she could still do it.
The exact moment she closed her eyes and tried to enjoy the precious quietness, the doorbell rang. She barely registered it. It was probably just one of her security guards coming in for the night shift. Although it was a little late for that, and her security wouldn't ring the doorbell.
She heard the door being opened, and she didn't hear it close right away, which was strange too. If it was a guard or anyone else who was welcome here, they would be invited in immediately. And if it was someone she didn't know, the door wouldn't have been opened in the first place.
Taylor sat up and tried to hear what was happening downstairs. There were the low voices of her guards, but there was also a higher—female—voice. But her friends would have told her they were coming, right? So who was—
"Miss Swift?" There was a soft knock at her door. "Are you awake?"
"Uh, yes," Taylor answered the guard confusedly. "Why, what's going on?"
"Sorry to disturb you, Ma'am, but Miss Kloss is here and she's asking to be let in."
Miss Kloss is here and she's asking to be let in.
Taylor's stomach made a backflip that was so intense that she thought she was going to be sick. Miss Kloss is here. And she's asking to be let in.
Karlie is here.
"Ma'am? Do you want us to tell her to leave?"
"No." Taylor heard herself say it, but her mind hadn't caught up yet. As if in trance, she stood up and started fixing her hair in the mirror.
"So she can come in?"
"Yes," Taylor said. "No. Wait. I'll go to the door, I'll talk to her." She put on her bathrobe and hastily made her way downstairs.
The first thing she saw when she opened the door was Karlie's eyes: they were watery and tired and they missed their usual spark. They were also green and familiar and Taylor's stomach somersaulted again and what the hell is she doing here? What is happening? What's going on? Who died?
She was only 60 percent sure she wasn't dreaming.
Karlie was soaked from the rain and she was leaning against the door post, shivering violently. She tried to smile when she saw Taylor, but all she could manage was a grimace. "Hi," she said softly, nervously.
Taylor was speechless.
Karlie looked at Taylor's clothing. "I'm sorry, were you already asleep?"
Taylor was still speechless.
"I'm sorry I didn't let you know I was coming."
When Taylor could form words again, they came out as jumbled and emotional as they were inside her head. "Are you out of your mind? What are you doing here? How do you even know where I live?" She pulled Karlie inside and closed the door. "Take off your coat, you're dripping all over the floor."
Karlie silently took off her coat, looking like a kicked puppy.
"Start answering questions," Taylor snapped.
"Okay, okay!" Karlie's voice was hoarse and Taylor unwillingly noted that she had missed the sound of it. "I'm not out of my mind. Your mom gave me your address. I need to talk to you."
"And you couldn't just give me a call?!"
"I didn't want to have this conversation over the phone."
"What conversation? I'm not talking to you! It's been 318 days!" Taylor said shrilly.
Karlie stared at her. "I know. I don't know what happened. I was listening to Ella's new album and the next thing I know I'm on a plane. It was stupid and impulsive and immature. I'm sorry. I know how much you hate unpredictability. I'm just gonna leave—"
"Wait, back up. You were listening to Ella's album? Which song?"
Karlie shrugged. "Uh, Supercut," she said sheepishly. "It reminded me of us."
Taylor scoffed. "I figured. Do you want to come into the living room or are we gonna stay here?"
Karlie followed her. "Wait, what do you mean you figured?"
"Do you want something to drink?"
"No, I'm good. Why did you figure I listened to Supercut? Do you know it?"
Taylor plopped down on the couch. "Honey, I wrote it. That's why it's so relatable."
Karlie's mouth fell open. "Oh, my God. That's weird. I literally thought 'huh, this sounds like something Taylor would write' when I heard it, but it never occurred to me that you could have written it. You decorated this place really nice by the way. I love this chair." She patted the armrest of the chair. "Not that I expected anything else from you, but—"
"Karlie, what are you doing here?"
Karlie sat down in the chair and folded her arms defensively. "There's something I need to say."
Taylor momentarily buried her face in her hands before looking up at Karlie. "Okay, no. You can't just waltz in here unannounced, okay? You can't mess with my emotions like that. And also, what if someone saw you?"
"Nobody saw me."
"You don't know that!"
"I'm sure, Taylor. I know how much your privacy means to you, I'd never do anything to jeopardize it."
"Right. Okay," Taylor mumbled. "Are you gonna talk or what?"
"Yes," Karlie said decisively. And in that moment, it really hit Taylor that Karlie was here, that she was sitting opposite her, that her hair was platinum blonde but that she didn't look all that different, that she sounded the same, that it had been 318 days, that Taylor sometimes dreamed about this, about having Karlie in this living room, that this was how it should have been. As a result of all these realizations, Taylor missed half of what Karlie was saying.
"Tay? Are you listening?"
"Yes. No. What did you say?"
"I was talking to Jack the other day—"
Taylor cut her off immediately. "Why the hell were you talking to Jack?"
"I ran into him at a party," Karlie clarified. "He told me you were working on new music."
"Why the hell would he tell you that?"
"He thought I knew. He wasn't aware we broke up."
"Oh," Taylor said softly. "Yeah, I guess I never told him."
Karlie scowled. "You and Jack are still friends, right?"
"Yeah. It just never came up." Taylor stared at her hands.
"Okay, well... I talked to Jack about your new album. He said you were super secretive about the music, so he didn't talk about genres and lyrics and all that, but he mentioned you two worked on some songs together. He said the lead single is amazing so I can't wait to hear it." Karlie smiled, but quickly averted her gaze when she saw Taylor's cold stare. "Um, anyway, Jack was completely caught off guard when I told him we broke up, and he said, 'But then why is she hiding out in a London suburb? I thought she was with you!' and I was like, 'No, she's not. I think she lives alone' and he was like, 'Oh, that's sad' and I was like, 'Yeah, it is'—"
"Karlie, cut to the chase."
"Right. Um, okay." Karlie was nervously fiddling with her ring. "Well, as Jack pointed out, you are hiding from the world as though you have something to hide. We talked about doing this. We would buy a house somewhere far away from the public eye and just—be together. Right?"
"Right. What's your point?"
Karlie inhaled deeply. "My point is that I'm an idiot. I should have spent the past ten months with you."
The silence that followed was deafening. Neither of them moved, Taylor was holding her breath—it had even stopped raining. There was nothing, except for the endless stream of scrambled thoughts inside Taylor's head. Because yes, Karlie should have spent the past ten months here. That was the plan. That was how it was supposed to be. That was how it was thought out in advance.
"I just—I didn't think you would really do it." Karlie suddenly sounded like she was on the brink of tears. "Buy a house in the middle of nowhere and leave it all behind. I thought it was just a fantasy, something we would talk about at 3 a.m. when we were both so fucking tired of everything that was happening, and—it didn't seem realistic that we were ever gonna decide to do something like that. If I could go back in time, I would cancel half of my schedule and move here with you. But I can't, and you're about to release a new album, and I'm too late, and that's fine. I just wanted to tell you I would have done it differently now. You didn't deserve to be walked out on like that. I'm sorry."
Taylor was quiet for a very long time. She'd spent so much time fantasizing about this, about seeing Karlie again, that the real thing just felt extremely unsettling. Her daydreams had a wide variety of themes; some of them were set in this very room and some were set naked in a bathroom stall. None of them, however, included an apology. She had no idea how she was supposed to react to this. 'It's okay' didn't seem quite right, because fuck no, it wasn't okay. But the time to be angry and bitter had long passed. She couldn't blame Karlie for leaving. She probably would have done the same if the roles were reversed.
After a time, Taylor stood up and walked over to the buffet. She could feel Karlie's eyes follow her movements, but neither of them said anything.
She opened a drawer and there it was: in the upper right corner, exactly where she had put it ten months ago. She hadn't looked at it since. She picked it up, closed the drawer, and returned to where Karlie was seated.
Karlie was still looking at her, now staring at her balled fist. With an almost stoic expression, Taylor put it down on the coffee table.
The small, square-shaped box.
Karlie eyed it as if it was about to attack her. "Is that—"
"Yes."
"Oh."
Taylor breathed deeply. "The night you broke up with me, I was gonna propose to you. Isn't that ironic?"
Karlie looked up at her, her hand pressed against her lips and her eyes filled with tears. And then she looked back at the box. "Can I see it?"
Taylor nodded. Karlie opened the box carefully. Inside, there was a silver ring with a small emerald. Subtle and unflamboyant, just like their relationship. The second Karlie saw it, she cradled her head in her hands and sobbed quietly.
Taylor sat down on the armrest of Karlie's chair and gently rubbed her back.
"The stupid thing is— I would have said yes." Karlie's voice was strangled with tears. "If you had beat me to it, I would have said yes. We would have been happy now."
"You don't know that, Karlie. All the things you said that night were true. That's why I didn't try to change your mind. I wasn't ready to tell the world about us yet. There was going to be another album. And even if those concerns didn't exist, there was still your career. I've seen you do so many amazing things this year. Your Express collection, Kode with Klossy, Adidas, Bill Nye... You would have missed out on so much if you had started declining these opportunities so you could spend time with me. The demands that come with my career shouldn't eclipse the demands that come with yours."
Karlie exhaled shakily and wiped at her cheek with the back of her hand. "I know, it's just— at night, when I'm alone in a hotel room in a city I'd never even heard of, I don't think about how amazing it is to travel the world and do what I love every day. I just think about you. Cause you were— you were everything."
"And still, you did the right thing," Taylor said quietly. "I really believe that. Well—I don't know what would have happened if we had gotten engaged that day, maybe things would have worked itself out. Or maybe it would have been a big mistake. We will never know."
Karlie sniffed. "It just sucks. I just—I've never had with anyone what I had with you, and I'm not sure if I'm ever gonna have it again."
"I know." Taylor's voice finally cracked. "I feel the same. But who knows—maybe we'll both find love elsewhere. Or maybe we'll find each other again when the timing is right."
"Yeah. Maybe." Karlie looked up and smiled weakly. "Sorry for dumping all this crap on you."
"No, it's fine. I'm glad we talked about this." Taylor returned the smile and ignored that Karlie's eyes still made her stomach tingle.
"Okay." Karlie bit her lip and stood up. "Well. I'm gonna go."
"No," Taylor said promptly.
Karlie halted mid-walk and turned around. "No?"
"You flew for seven hours to get here. The least I can do is make you a drink."
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Okay, so I'd love to hear your thoughts and I'd love to hear what else you think I should write. I do not plan on writing a part two for this— the ending is open on purpose. Thank you for reading!!
Nikki