"Did you see Sam's Instagram post?"
I looked up at my sister. She had taken a seat at the edge of my bed, a giddy smile on her lips as she held her cell phone in front of my face. Sighing, I placed the magazine I was reading down. Ever since I met Sam, I had been reading gossip magazines like it was my job just to perhaps get a glimpse of him when he was so far away.
I took her phone, which had now turned black, and typed in her password. "You know I don't have an Instagram," I reminded her, just as the app popped up on the screen. Despite the fact I didn't have an account, the photo I was looking at was of myself.
It was a photo of me at the restaurant Sam and I went to in Paris. I was leaning against the balcony, staring off into the distance of the city. You couldn't see my face or anything, but it was definitely a good photo.
Sam's account (samford1) had posted it. The caption read: Thanks for having me, Paris. You were amazing but your views were better :)
I felt myself smile, my eyes drifting upwards to meet Sarah's shining ones. She was suppressing a grin. "How cute? I mean how cute is that?"
I chuckled, blushing. "It's cute." I scrolled down the screen slightly to see a few comments on Sam's post. The one comment I could see was a couple of heart emojis. The person who commented it was, of course, my sister. Above her comment, though, were 20,000 more. Twenty thousand.
"Holy..." I began to scroll through them, the smile quickly fading from my lips. Some of them were about Sam, some of them were in other languages, but most of them were about me.
So you're into blondes?
Who's the boy!?
That kid looks like he's 12
You can do a million times better Sam
I locked my sister's phone and tossed it back at her, keeping myself from reading anymore. "Jesus," she scrambled to catch the device. "What's wrong?"
"Have you read those comments?"
She nodded but didn't look as affected as I felt. "Sam's a celebrity, Taite. That's nothing compared to the crap he takes."
It didn't feel like nothing.
"Relax, Taite," she stood up from my bed. "You're going to get shit. It comes with dating a celebrity."
Right as she was leaving I mumbled a soft "we're not dating," but I doubt she even heard me. Seconds after my door shut behind her, my phone rang. It was Sam.
"Hey, Sam."
"Hey, babe. What's up?"
"You posted an Instagram of me?" My tone sounded much more accusatory than the sentence let on, but I was still feeling a little attacked. Sam chuckled.
"You don't have Instagram. Did Sarah show you?"
"Yeah," I paused, taking a deep breath so I didn't sound like a whiny bitch. "Have you read what people are commenting about me?"
"Taite, you can't read that crap. I get it all the time. People are jealous and angry. You have to learn to ignore it."
"I don't want to ignore it, Sam. I don't want it to exist."
He was silent for a few seconds. "So, should I delete it?"
"No," I sighed for what felt like the eighth time today. "It's not just about the Instagram—"
"It's not?"
"It's just I hate being in the spotlight, I hate that the world has such an intimate window into my life—"
"So you're saying the problem is me. I'm the one bringing the world into your life." I didn't say anything. Sam took a deep breath in. He sounded distressed. "If you want to be in a healthy, normal relationship with me Taite, there are going to be photos. We are going to be publicized. It's the price you're going to have to pay to make us work, you know?"
I sat up straighter. "I didn't know we were in a relationship, Sam."
"That's what this is, Taite. Me and you. It's a relationship."
"I never signed off on a relationship, Sam. You never told me we were in a relationship."
"Bloody hell, Taite!" He was clearly upset with me. I was clearly upset with him. The volume of our voices had been gradually rising since the moment I answered his call. "If you don't want that, it's fine. I get it. Just tell me now."
His voice had gotten softer, more defeated. I let mine do the same. "Everything's just happening so quickly, Sam. I'm... I'm just trying to adjust to everything."
Everything being me Taite Jefferson, son of the governor--supposedly straight son of the governor-- now sucking the dick of a very handsome and very famous pop singer. This was definitely an adjustment.
"I get it," he sounded more genuine, less pissed. "I'm sorry."
"But you're my best friend, Sam. I'd never let you go, either way."
"You're my best friend too, Taite." I smiled, settling back into the pillows on my bed. "No matter what."
__
The summer was coming to an end. Sam had left for his US tour about 2 weeks after I saw him in Paris. I was busy working at the clinic and helping on the farm and trying to convince my distraught father that Tufts was just as good of a school as UVA. About a week before I had to leave for college, he finally came around.
I got a call from Sam while my mother and I were dorm room shopping at the Bed Bath and Beyond in Blue Falls.
My mom heard my phone ring and raised her eyebrows suggestively at me. I had a feeling she knew a little more than I was telling her. I ignored her, pulling my phone from my pocket. "Yo."
"I'm horny."
I snorted. "And I am in Bed Bath and Beyond with my mother."
"Damn. School shopping?"
"Of course."
"Listen, I've got three free days coming up. It's gonna be the only time I can really get away for a while."
I felt myself grow giddy. I turned down an aisle away from my mom. "Yeah? Come visit. Please. I miss you."
"I'd love to," he sounded breathless. "I'd be able to come from August 28th to the 30th."
"Fuck," I mumbled, ignoring the elderly woman shopping for curtains giving me a nasty sneer. "I leave for school on the 26th."
"Fuck."
"Well didn't you say you had a concert in Boston on the tour? When is that?"
Sam took a deep breath on the other line. "Not until the end of February."
I dropped the mug I had been fiddling with. "You're kidding."
"Nope."
I felt my fingers tug at the ends of my hair. "February?"
"Why... why don't you come visit me on tour? I'll be out West. You can come to a California show in a few weeks?"
I felt my head shaking. "I can't Sam. I'll just be getting started with school, and trying to make friends and figure everything out. I can't just leave."
"Why not? It'll be one weekend; you'll miss two days of school max. Come on."
"No, Sam. I can't. I'm sorry. I wish I could but I just can't."
"What about during Christmas break?"
"Yeah I'll be home for three weeks, I think. That should work. Yeah."
He sighed. "Yeah. But it's four months away."
I swallowed back the lump that had arisen in my throat. Four months? That was so long. Too long. I didn't want to go that long without him. I didn't think I could. For some reason, I had started working myself up enough for tears to gather in the bottom of my eyes. In the middle of Bed Bath and Beyond. With the elderly lady still staring at me.
I cleared my throat. "We'll talk later, Sam. Mom's, uh, mom's calling me. Talk later."
"Ok, Taite but—" I hung up before I could hear what else he was going to say. It took a few deep breaths to blink the tears from my eyes. When I looked up, my mom had appeared. She was staring at me. Her arms were crossed over her chest.
"Taite Jefferson. Why on earth are you crying?"
I quickly wiped my eyes. "I'm not crying."
She placed her hands on her hips. "He didn't break up with you, did he?"
"He didn't---what?"
"Sam. He's making you cry! Why is he making my baby cry?"
"I, I wasn't talking to Sam. And I'm not crying."
My mother laughed. "Oh honey," she paused to giggle more. "You need to get better at lying."
She sounded just like my sister. I cringed.
"Well?" She asked once she finally stopped laughing, looking at me expectantly. "Are you two okay?"
"We're fine," I rushed out. "And we're not dating, mom. We're... we're both boys."
My mom wasn't stupid. She was actually a Boston College grad. And a mother. She knew when I was spewing bullshit. "Sam's gay, sweetie. And you're.... You've never had a girlfriend. With the way you two look at each other, it's easy to put two and two together."
I let out a long breath of air. "Jeez, Mom."
"That, and Mrs. Ford told me you two were sleeping together. And now I think, is the perfect time to have a little discussion about the birds and the bees and—"
"Mom!"
"Sweetie, you need to be safe and I'm your mother! And—"
"Mom! We're in the middle of Bed Bath and Beyond! Can this please wait?"
Despite the fact I was completely justified in my statement, my mother looked horribly offended.
"Taite Jefferson I am your mother and if I want to talk about sex with you—"
"MOM!"
Finally, she stopped talking. She raised her eyebrows at me but started pushing her chock-full cart out of the aisle nonetheless, mumbling a quiet "we're not done here" as she passed me on the way out.
--
Hello my dear friends. I know these last few chapters have been a little uneventful but if you've read my other books, you know that I always have something up my sleeve ... :) keep reading! Love you guys