*Trigger Warning - Discussion of Self-Harm Scars*
The exams drained Hermione a lot. They weren't too difficult - which was both reassuring and worrying - but the effort it took to make sure she was fully prepared each day for her exam was ever increasing. The fact that she hadn't struggled with her exams made Hermione wonder if she really knew exactly what she was writing about, or if she had completely misinterpreted the questions. Her friends sympathised, and they had all agreed in the end that there was no point in them dwelling on it, as the papers in question were over and done with and they couldn't change it at this point.
The real effort was in mentally preparing herself. Hermione needed to check through her notes a dozen times each night before the exam before she was satisfied she had really covered everything. And if Ginny mentioned a section she wasn't entirely sure she had revised, Hermione would revisit her entire folder of notes until she was certain she would remember it come the next day.
Hermione was feeling down a lot of the time. The constant feeling that she could be doing more plagued every moment she wasn't cramming her brain, and even when she was ,Hermione felt like it wasn't sticking. It was having an effect on her mood, and she regularly felt... not depressed, but not just sad either. She felt flattened.
The weekend after her first full week of exams was, in Hermione's mind, going to be spent revising heavily for the upcoming tests the following Monday. But her friends wanted to take a break, and they knew as well as she did that they all needed it.
"Come on," Seamus begged, "It's worth spending a bit of time relaxing, isn't it? And we all deserve it after all our revision."
"I agree, but we can't afford to slack off now," Hermione replied. "It would be terrible if we failed the things coming up next week because we couldn't use our time this weekend properly."
"We're not slacking, we're taking time for ourselves - which is healthy," Draco pointed out. "Please, Hermione. There's a Hogsmeade day on Sunday, so we can go shopping in the morning, get some lunch and then come back to school in time for some afternoon revision if you really can't bear not to."
Hermione sighed. Everyone was looking at her expectantly. She didn't want to be the person who spoiled it for them, so she relented. Her stomach sank a little, and a small bubble of panic rose inside her, but Hermione knew deep down that she needed to take some time for herself as well. She didn't want to admit it, but she could feel herself sinking into another episode of sadness and was scared that it could become something bigger. All she had to do was work, work, work, until her exams were over and then she'd never have another piece of schoolwork ever again. But it wasn't that easy, and Hermione couldn't let herself fall through again.
On the Saturday she took her books down to the Lake, alone, and worked as hard as she could all morning until her mind was numb with all the facts and figures and formulae she had forced it to focus on. Hermione went up to the Great Hall for lunch, then left all her work back in her dorm. She was determined to make herself forget about it for a moment so that she could remember what it was like to feel free.
The rest of the day Hermione spent with her friends. They were all trying to take a break from revision, so were steering all conversation away from exams. Whenever anyone mentioned anything vaguely pertaining to lessons, or subjects, someone would loudly announce, "SO! Has anyone seen the Quidditch results?" and everyone would laugh and focus on something else. It was the kind of running joke that anyone else would have found entirely ridiculous, but to them it was hysterical.
Time went quickly, and soon they were being shooed out of the Great Hall as it was such a nice day. They all went down to the Lake again, and it was discovered that Ginny had a mini Quidditch set in her bag.
"How on earth did you carry that around all day?" Luna asked as Ginny pulled inactivated Bludgers, a Snitch and a Quaffle from her rucksack.
"They work like Muggle balls do. They're another one of George's newest creations - you can use them in smaller spaces because they're not magical, and it's a good way to introduce young children to Quidditch. So someone carries the Snitch, and the Seekers have to try to grab it. The Beaters just throw the Bludgers at people, and the Quaffle works as normal. It's really easy, and it's quite fun too. It works with fewer people as well." Ginny did jazz-hands as she shamelessly advertised the set, before throwing the balls to various people and beginning a game.
There was a lot of swearing and shouting as people were bashed into, hit with the Quaffle and insulted by team-mates for missing obvious throws and open goals. Hermione was meant to be a Seeker against Dean, but Draco was holding the Snitch and being a Chaser simultaneously as there weren't enough people. She chased after him, breathlessly laughing, as Dean pushed her out of the way and bumped into Seamus. Draco was dodging her miraculously, and also managed to hit Luna in the side with the Quaffle as he tried to pass it to Ginny. Hermione leapt to grab the Snitch as Draco turned away from her, but he lifted it high above his head so that Hermione couldn't reach it.
"You know full-well I'm too short to reach that!" Hermione cried, laughing and jumping up and down in front of him.
"Yup. I'm a horrible person!" Draco chuckled as she clung to his shoulders and stood on tiptoe to flail at his outstretched arm.
"C'mon, be a little fairer!" Hermione poked him in the ribs, and Draco momentarily lowered the Snitch as he went to protect his side. As Hermione grabbed at it, she pulled on his sleeve which fell down to reveal the Dark Mark and the white lines that blurred it. Draco froze for a moment, and quickly pushed the sleeve up to his wrist again, covering it once more. Hermione didn't try to get the Snitch as he did this.
"I'm sorry," she said quietly as she pulled herself up by his shoulders. Their faces were a few inches apart.
"It's fine, you didn't mean to. I'm... I'm still ashamed of it, that's all."
"The Mark, or the scars?"
"Both." Draco gave her a soft smile that told her she was forgiven. He kissed her lightly on the lips, and brought the Snitch to just within her reach. Hermione was just about to gently take it when Dean hurtled towards them and snatched it away.
"I've got the Snitch! I've got it! HA! We win!" he cheered, running around and whooping until he slipped on some grass and fell over. Everyone laughed and clapped at his spectacular fall, and it was agreed that they were too hot and tired to bother with a rematch.
Hermione was so filled with affection for her friends in that moment. Times like these reminded her how much fun they all were, and how grateful she was for their company. Of course, it also made her think about Harry and Ron and how much they were missing out on - and how much she missed them - but Hermione focused on her love for the others rather than that.
They lounged about on the grass, Ginny complaining that she would get even frecklier in the sunshine and Luna explaining how adorable freckles were while making daisy chains. Dean was discussing football with Seamus - he still didn't get all the fuss - and Draco was fiddling with Hermione's hair as she shielded her eyes from the sun.
Pretty soon the direct heat was too much and they migrated to the shade of one of the trees by the Lake, and Luna was placing the daisy crowns on everyone's heads.
"This isn't the most masculine thing you've ever made us do," Seamus complained gruffly as Luna adjusted his fringe.
"But you look so pretty!" she exclaimed, now moving on to Ginny. The crown wouldn't stay on her shiny red head, so Luna instead poked individual daisies into the thick strands, giving Ginny the look of an orange flowery curtain. Hermione's crown kept getting lost in all the frizz, and the daisies were barely visible against Draco's pale hair, but Luna insisted they all looked like woodland creatures and they were beautiful. Ginny blushed but claimed it was sunburn, and Dean thanked Luna graciously while Seamus continued to grumble about his "compromised masculinity". Dean responded to that by cuddling him and peppering Seamus' cheeks with kisses. Hermione laughed, and Ginny started yelling at them to get a room.
They were so happy together, just being friends in the sunshine, and for a while Hermione forgot about all the worries she had had before. There was time. And she wouldn't have given up that afternoon for anything.
***
The next day, Hermione woke up with Ginny poking her head through the curtains of her four-poster telling her to get up and get ready for Hogsmeade. When Hermione groaned and asked for more sleep, Ginny and Luna pulled her duvet off the bed and threatened to pour water over her head until Hermione sat up, rubbing her eyes blearily and told them she was sufficiently awake.
They got dressed and went down for breakfast together. The boys weren't awake yet, so they started without them. By the time they were all ready and had eaten the Great Hall was nearly empty.
"Why are you guys so slow to get up?" Ginny asked Dean in exasperation.
"I don't know," he shrugged, "I thought it was meant to be girls who take forever to get ready."
"Well, just be grateful Hermione's too sleepy to argue against your misogyny," Luna commented.
"You should be pleased I didn't bother to do my makeup today, or I'd still be upstairs," Ginny grinned.
Hogsmeade was filled with students when they arrived. As it was one of the last Hogsmeade weekends before the end of term, everyone wanted to spend some time out shopping with friends before the holidays. They all wanted to go to different shops, so the group split off into its natural pairings; Dean and Seamus went to Zonkos, Ginny and Luna went into Honeydukes and Hermione and Draco were stood by the fountain wondering where to go.
"I honestly have no idea," Draco said, looking around. "I don't really want anything in particular. Shall we just have a look in the windows, and see if we want to have a look around?"
"Sounds perfect," Hermione agreed.
They went to Flourish and Blotts, and ended up spending ages looking at new books Hermione had seen. She missed reading Muggle fiction, but had really started enjoying a few wizarding authors recently. There were some books she wanted to buy, so Draco waited beside the queue as she paid for her new stack of novels.
They went into Honeydukes just as Luna and Ginny were leaving. According to them there was a huge new stock of delicious sweets, so Draco went to look at the freshly organised shelves. He bought a few bags of various fudges and chocolates, and also bought himself and Hermione and ice-cream each. The ice-creams ended up melting everywhere as the weather was so warm, and they both had puddles of cream all over their shoes by the time they had finished them.
"There was something I saw an advert for in the Daily Prophet that I want to see if I can find," Draco mentioned. "I think they have it in a shop on the far side of town, but I don't know. Is it OK if we go there? It might be a bit of a walk."
"I don't mind," Hermione said. "We've got plenty of time."
When they reached the last lane of Hogsmeade before it became open road, it was clear that the only two shops there were specialists. One stocked rare and highly expensive potion ingredients, and the other was a kind of magical pharmacy. Draco went to look in the windows of both, and Hermione asked him what he was looking for.
"The advert was for... It was for a kind of ointment that can remove magical scarring," he said, quickly, "I wanted some for my chest, and I thought you might also like it for your arm-- I don't know, because you might not want to remove it - I mean, I don't know why you wouldn't, but you might prefer not to dabble in magical healing - and I wasn't sure whether buying it for you without discussing it would seem presumptuous, or --"
Hermione cut him off by kissing him. He stopped talking, and lowered his arms filled with bags as he held her waist. Hermione finally let go of him and smiled widely.
"You are so thoughtful. And I love you so much."
Draco grinned at her, blushing a little, and found an advert for the ointment in the window of the pharmacy. It seemed they were in luck. They went in, and asked the man behind the till about buying it. He explained that it wasn't guaranteed to work for all kinds of scarring, so they shouldn't be disappointed if it didn't work fully.
"It's been tested on most kinds of scars, but there haven't been that many people willing to take part in the clinical trials, understandably," he told them. He asked them how many tubs they wanted, and Draco paid for both of them.
They got outside the shop, and both grinned widely at the other. Hermione would no longer be branded with the word 'Mudblood' on her arm. Draco would no longer have reminders of He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named's cruelty on his body. They would finally be free of the scars that had haunted them.
***
That night, when everyone was asleep, Hermione slipped out of bed and took the tub of cream from her nightstand. Carefully, she read the label and the instructions on the packaging.
'Vulnera Sanata - the eraser for magical scarring. Use sparsely, rubbing the cream into the affected area twice a day, at morning and night. On nights of full moons, use only in the morning. WARNING: This product cannot be guaranteed to work on all types of magically-induced scar tissue.'
Taking a small amount on her fingers, Hermione rubbed the pale blue cream into the words on her forearm. It was cold, but warmed as it came in contact with her skin. Then, there was nothing.
Hermione wondered if it would actually work. It might not - she may forever be marked as the 'Mudblood'. But she was okay with that. She was surprised that she wasn't more unhappy with the idea that she may have that scar forever. It would always be there physically, but the mental pain that had come with it was gone now. Her scars were finally healing.