a/n: Yesterday went terrible for me. As i had mentioned previously in another chapter, it was going to be my first official meeting with my psychologist for my therapy sessions. I went home nervous after school and wet to my bedroom. I started crying so much I could not stop, then i realized I could not breath. I was having a panic attack, but I'm used o having them by now so I knew how to calm myself down.
I grabbed for my phone, lay down in my bed, and played the song Fake You Out. This song means so much to be and always has ever since day one. I always listen to it whenever I am sad, stressed or just having a hard time. It's the first thing I always turn to and I honestly don't know what I'd do without this music.
So basically, I got put on medication which I don't know if I'm happy about. I don't want to be living my life of some drug to be keeping me alive, but I'll still take it.|-/
Any way that's enough rambling about my sad life of mine. Here's the next chapter, I've been excited to write this one :)
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Tyler's Pov:
Me, Brendon and Josh had gotten off the bus and finally arrived at the building where the party was being held. I had butterflies in my stomach as I had never really been to a party before.
The three of us walked down beside the building into this dark alleyway. Was this where we were meant to be going? This did not seem right. The entrance to the building was back there at the front. Am I going to die? Was this some sort of plot to kill me? No no no, I'm far too young to die.
I'm probably just over reacting, Josh knows where he is going, right? Brendon does not seem to be scared so why should I. But as I think of it, I haven't know Josh for that long. Do I really trust him? I don't really know much about him, so technically he's a stranger. And strangers are dangerous, my mum always told me to stay away from them. Oh no, oh no, I'm breathing heavily. Calm down Tyler, you'll be okay. But is he a stranger? Stranger danger! STRANGER DANGER!
Brendon noticed my breathing pace and stopped walking to put a hand on my shoulder. "Sshhh, Tyler breath. In and out, in and out."
In and out I repeated in my head and I carried on breathing.
"Just ignore anything your head is telling you, you'll be alright." I nodded my head then looked over to Josh who's eyes were filled with nothing but concern.
"I should not have dragged you out here tonight," Josh said guiltily and running a hand through his red hair.
"No no, I'm fine. I promise," I replied reassuringly. I did not want to ruin anyone elses fun.
We followed Josh until we reached a metal back door to the building. I could hear loud music booming from the other side. Josh knocked on the door and it opened revealing a man in a black hoodie and jeans.
The man eyed Josh suspiciously as if he were waiting for some sort of confirmation from him.
"It's Dun," Josh said to the man, "Joshua Dun."
The man nodded and immediately swung open the door letting the three of us in then shut the door behind us.
I adjusted my eyes to the darkness and bright neon lights shining through out the basement. The room was filled with drunken teenagers dancing to the thumping music and it the corner of the room there was, what looked like to be, a bar.
The three of us made our way over to the bar where Pete, Patrick, Jack, Alex and Ryan were standing.
"Hey guys," both Brendon and Josh greeted while I cowardly stood behind them not saying anything. Patrick noticed me and smiled, "hi Tyler."
Jack turned his head in confusion then gasped sarcastically when he saw me. "Tyler? Who would have guessed," he chuckled. Everyone else turned to face me.
I awkwardly smiled at the group keeping silent. I could feel my cheeks heating up but it was dark so I hope no one could see.
This girl then stumbled over, she was clearly drunk, and grabbed Jack's hand. "C'mon babe, let's dance," She giggled twirling her hair.
"Yes Tanya," Jack smiled following after his girlfriend. Alex left to go dance too, but with some random girl he found.
I took a seat next to Pete who turned to talk to me. "Here try this," he smirked sliding over a glass to me.
Patrick rolled his eyes, "you're not going to start making him drink, Pete."
"It's one glass, he'll be fine," Pete retorted.
Josh took a seat next to me and watched me as I eyed the glass not sure what to do. I took a sniff of it and immediately scrunched up my nose.
"Aww look how innocent he is," cooed Brendon and Josh chuckled.
"I'm not innocent," I muttered.
"Then drink it," said Pete.
"Yeah Tyler," Josh said Smirking. "Drink it."
I sighed and picked up the glass. I had to still do what Josh ordered until midnight. I took a sip feeling the bevarage burn down my throat. I looked over at Josh who gestured for me to carry on.
I huffed a lifted the glass gulping it all down as quickly as I could, slamming the glass back down on the counter when done.
"Oh my God, Tyler," said Ryan in awe.
"You did not just do that," Patrick said shocked. Pete and Brendon burst out laughing while Josh just smirked at me. I blushed bright red and tried to cover it with my hand.
Josh pushed my hand away and smiled, "C'mon baby boy, let's go dance."
The group of got up into the crowd of teenagers. Brendon passed me a champagne bottle. "Drink!" He shouted over the loud music. I obliged pooping open the bottle and taking a gulp. I felt my self loosening up after a while and my tummy felt funny, but in a good way.
I carried on drinking and moving along to the beat if the music. It felt so good. As if I was floating around in this sea of chaos, absolutely nothing was on my mind. My nerves had seemed to slip away as I danced harder than ever before. Josh laughed at how hyper I had become and I just giggled. I laughed and laughed and I don't know why.
Josh had drunken but was only slightly tipsy. He was still sober enough to realize what was happening.
My bottle had run out, I grabbed another one. The music got louder and louder.
Every one started singing along to one specific song, including Josh.
"HUMP ME, FUCK ME. DADDY BETTER MAKE ME CHOKE!"
Ryan was grinding against Brendon.
"HUMP ME, FUCK ME. MY TUNNEL LOVES TO DEEP THROAT."
I moved closer to Josh.
"LICK, LICK, LICK, LICK."
Josh moved closer to me.
"I WANNA EAT YO' DICK!"
I stumbled and Josh caught me in his arms.
"BUT I CAN'T FUCK UP MY NAILS,"
We stared into each other's eyes, Josh's big brown mocha eyes.
"SO IMMA PICK IT UP WITH CHOP STICKS!"
I burst out laughing and Josh laughed along, while I was still being held in his arms.
"MOUTH WIDE OPEN, MOUTH WIDE OPEN. MOUTH WIDE OPEN LIKE I WAS AT THE DENTIST."
The room was chaotic and packed full with screaming drunk teens, sloppy kisses, sexual dancing, and the strong smell of alcohol lingering in the air.
I leaned in closer to Josh and he pushed me away. I looked at him confused. "Jenna?" he said raising an eyebrow.
I furrowed my brows, " Who's Jenna?"
He sighed and rubbed his forehead. I had honestly no idea what he was talking about. "Your girlfriend." he stated.
"I have a girlfriend?" I questioned and he nodded. "That's complete nonsense, I don't have a girlfriend. I'm gay," I argued back and his mouth fell agape. He looked at me in complete shock.
"Tyler," he huffed out with his eyes still wide. "No no, you're just drunk. I should probably get you home."
"J-Josh, I'm fine," I said stumbling over to him and he backed away.
"No Tyler you're not," He said strernly. "C'mon, let's go Tyler."
"B-b-but," I felt my head getting dizzy. Everything was spinning, blurred, a big mush of colours. I strained my eyes to try see properly. Josh, he was walking away, I saw him just clearly enough to make out his features.I struggled to follow after him, tripping a few times but catching my balance.
I stumbled. I started falling. I was on the floor. Josh was hovering over me. I squinted my eyes. I saw black.