Two months after I went home and stayed for a few days in San Francisco, I got an invite from Tita Alex. Its her birthday and I got invited. She even personally went to see me sa bahay. Mom was not there so she made me promise to bring my Mom at the party. She said it was a private party and only few are invited. I can't say no to her kasi she's Tita Alex. She's nothing but nice to me.
Also, Adam told me na okay lang naman na hindi ako pumunta. Sya na daw bahala mag-explain and that his family would understand why I can't come or rather, why I wouldn't come. But of course, kahit hesitant ako kasi I know I will see Blue there and also Ice, I still need to come. I gave my word to Tita Alex and Mom loves her. She can't say no.
It's been months and to say that I have moved on is a lie. One thing I realized about what happened to us is that no one can ever moved on from something thats great. What Ice and I had was maybe short but...it will stay here, at this beating muscle of mine.
"Sure ka ba na pupunta ka?" Trisha asked. Tiningnan ko sya at umirap. "Ngayon pa ba ako aatras? Nakabihis na ko. Si Mommy na lang hinihintay ko." lumapit ako sa salamin at tiningnan mabuti ang ayos ng mukha ko and battle my head if my lipstick fits my feelings today.
"Nakabihis ka pa lang naman. Pede ka pa umatras." Sumunod sya sakin at naglabas ng matte lipstick galing sa pouch nya. "Mas bagay 'to. Remove that one." tiningnan ko sya sabay kuha sa inaabot nya.
"Trisha, one way or another, makakasalubong ko pa rin si Ice at Blue. Kahit anong iwas ko, kahit anong pilit kong tumakbo, destiny will have its way." I got some cotton balls to remove my current shade of lipstick.
"But still, diba, iwas na lang tayo. Mas okay yun. Hindi masakit. Saka diba, sabi Adam okay lang naman na wag ka ng pumunta." pagpipilit pa din nya.
"I'm not okay. Hindi okay ang makita silang dalawa. Pero okay ako kay Tita Alex. Ayaw ko syang idamay sa away namin. Tito Kevin is really good too. And, ayaw ko namang maleft out si Adam." I brushed the matte lipstick on my lips and it screams my feelings.
"You know what? Never kitang natanong but...anong meron sa inyo ni Adam?" Tumayo ako ng ayos, check my self once again and looked at her.
"Friends." I answered. Naglakad ako papunta kama to get my bag and she just followed.
"Lang?" Sabi nya.
"Friends lang." Ulit ko pa. Adam and I have this connection. Pakiramdam ko nga soulmate ko sya. Naiintindihan nya ako sa lahat ng bagay. At kung hindi man nya naiintindihan, pinipilit nyang intindihin. Nagkakasundo din kami sa madaming bagay. Parehas kami ng gustong pagkain, kanta, loyalty sa brand and stuffs. That's why he's my soulmate. He understands and knows me well, better than I know myself.
"Fine. I'll rest my case. One last question, sure ka na aattend ka?" Umirap ulit ako at umarteng ihahampas sa kanya ang bag ko. Tumawa naman sya. "Oo na. Naniniguro lang. Let's go. Baka okay na si Tita."
"Asa tayo." lumabas kami ni room and found Mom just locking her door. "Oh, you guys ready? Tara na." She said. Masyado akong naging busy sa kalandian ko na nakalimutan ko na si Mommy. She had this drastic change. From super OA outfits, medyo reserve na sya ngayon. I don't know what happened. She still wears her quirky outfits pero not that much na. She actually looks good at her black dress tonight.
"You look good Mom." I said. "Oo nga Tita! Photo op tayo!" Lumapit kami kay Mommy to take a selfie. "Okay google, take a selfie." Sabi ni Trisha. We all smiled. Couple more pictures and we decided to leave.
"This is so not Tita Alex." That was Trisha's word ng makarating kami sa hotel nila. "Tita was never a fond of big party's like this." Sobrang dami ng tao. Everyone was wearing black, white and silver.
"Tatawagan ko na ba si Adam?" Trisha asked and started typing on her phone. "Ako na." I said and smiled at her. She said okay ang continued typing on her phone.
"Cream, I'll just go around the place and great some friends. Would you like to come?" Mom asked me. I awkwardly smiled. "Sorry Mom. I'm.."
"Just trying my luck, iha. See you around?" I smiled and gave her a kiss. "See you around Mom."
"Oh, eto na pala si Adam!" Trisha declared. I smiled upon seeing him. "Looking good!" I said. Tumawa lang sya. "And you ladies, look gorgeous." I and Trisha looked at each other and said, "we always are."
Adam ushered us to where his family is. Of course, tinanong nya muna ako if I'm okay kasi I will probably see Ice there and maybe Blue kasi she's like literally, a part of the family.
"Sure ka, okay lang?" Adam asked me once again. Ilang tables na lang layo namin. "Oo nga." I said smilling. Well, I need to take this chance. If Ice will not talk to me, I'll respect that. Ngayon, naiintindihan ko na kung bakit dapat mapagod ang isang tao. Kasi kailangan na nyang tumigil.
"Deep breath, Cream." Trisha hushed. Natawa ako. Saan ba 'ko sasabak? Para namang may susuntukin ako dito or what.
"Guys stop fidgeting. Okay lang ako. Kayo? Okay lang kayo?" I asked both of them. Nagkatinginan lang sila at natawa. "Yeah. Why are we worried? She's Cream. She's not afraid of anything except..ipis?" Napailing na lang ako kay Trisha.
All right. Here we go.
"Mom!" Tawag ni Adam kay Tita. Everyone in the table looked. I gave them my sweetest smile and of course being the Villarasa family, they all smiled at me.
"Cream! Iha!" Tita Alex said. Tumayo pa sya to welcome me with a hug. "Happy birthday po." Bati ko sa kanya.
"I'm so glad you came!"
"I'm happy to be here po. Hi Tito." I said at nakipag beso naman kay Tito Kevin.
"Good to see you again, Cream. Looking great ha?" Kumindat pa si Tito Kevin.
"Tito, talaga! Bolahin mo na lahat. Wag lang ako." Nilapitan ko din ang triplets. Rain was so happy to see me. Ngayon ko lang ulit nakita si Storm and he's looking really handsome.
"Teka, where's Ice? He was here a while ago." Takang tanong ni Tita Alex. Trisha said hi also to the whole table. Nagkaroon pa sila ng little chitchat ni Rain.
"He left." Sky said. "He said, he's going to get liquor." Tumungo tungo naman si Tita.
"Teka Cream, where's your Mom?"
"Uhm, probably around Tita. Naghiwalay kami kasi sabi nya, she'll greet her friends."
"Oh yes! Oh sya, I have to leave. Mag he-hello muna ko sa mga visitors ko. You can sit here if you want. If you need anything, ask Adam or Ice. Okay?" Tumungo naman ako.
"And Trisha, where's Ian?" Tumingin sakin si Trisha at natawa naman ako.
"Di ko po alam." Mabilis nyang sagot. Mukhang nagets naman ni Tita ang ibig sabihin ni Trisha.
"Oh. Okay. See you around. Enjoy, okay?"
"Okay, Tita." Trisha answered. Lumapit ako sa kanya sabay bulong.
"I don't want to sit here." Sabi ko sa kanya. "Me too. Nakaka intimidate." sabi nya na napatawa naman ako.
"Labas na lang muna tayo? Let's grab some fresh air." Suggestion ko.
"Sure! That's a good idea. I'll get something to drink, una ka na sa labas."
"Adam, labas lang kami. Ikaw ba?" I asked.
"Sunod ako sa inyo. I just have to get something sa room. Tawag na lang ako."
"Okay. Let's go Trisha?" Naglakad na kami papunta sa kung saan man. I saw a lot of familiar faces. Ngumiti naman ako to show respect.
"Cream, I'll get some wine. Ikaw, what do you want?"
"Anything. Una na ko ha?" Sabi ko sa kanya at naghanap na ng lalabasan.
Finally! A breath of fresh air!
Ang daming tao sa loob. Nasu-suffocate na ako. I'm not really into social things. Siguro isa 'to sa mga dapat kong i-improve sa sarili ko.
I found myself a concrete bench in the garden. I removed my heels because its starting to iritate me.
Tumingala ako to look at the stars. They're shinning brightly tonight. Good job stars!
After a few minutes, Trisha came with two glasses of wine.
"Cheers to never ending wounds." Sabi nya sakin. What the hell. Ang nega naman ng isang 'to.
"Cheers to your negativity." I said.
"Yuck. Ang panget ng celebration natin. Paltan natin ng something positive. Uhm, cheers sa lahat ng taong hindi sumusuko." She said.
"Cheers sa lahat ng taong walang balak sumuko." I said and raised my glass.
"Oh God, ang gloomy nun." Sabi ni Trisha after ng isang sip sa wine. Tumawa na lang ako ng mahina at nanahimik kami.
Sobrang tahimik ng buhay namin these past few weeks. Halos feeling ko nga, wala na kaming life. Never akong naging tutok ng ganito sa studies ko. Parang lahat ng attention ko, nilagay ko na dito. Wala na akong mapaglagayan eh. Trisha also, she's very attentive na sa mga classes. Hindi na rin kami laging late. Parang naging routine na lang ang lahat. Minsan, uuwi ako at marerealize how boring my day went. If its with Ice...
No, erase. Stop it Cream. Akala ko ba, pahinga muna. Stop muna, okay?
Trisha's phone started ringing. Dahil yun lang ang maingay, pareho kaming mapatingin dun. It was Ian. Hindi pa rin sila okay hanggang ngayon. Hindi ko alam kung anong nangyari. Ayaw ko naman pilitin si Trisha. Kahit super curious na ako kung bakit sobrang tagal na nilang ganito, never akong nagtanong. Trisha will speak when she's ready.
Pinatay ni Trisha ang tawag. I looked at her and she's just staring at her phone.
It started ringing again with Ian's header.
"Come on Trisha, answer that. Hindi ka nyan masasaktan. Just, a phone call won't hurt." I said. She again, dropped the call. Tiningnan ko sya ng masama.
One more ring with Ian's header and I will...
It started ringing again. Inagaw ko ang phone kay Trisha. "Hey Ian, its Cream. Wait lang ah. Busy pa si Trisha eh. Ay, okay na pala." Inabot ko sa kanya ang phone nya habang pinandidilatan ako. Ngumiti lang ako. Tumayo sya at kinuha ang phone.
Well, I'm just looking for an improvement from them. Wala na nga yung sakin, wag naman yung kanila.
I wore my heels again and decided to walk around the garden. Lumayo kay Trisha dahil baka may marinig ako na dapat kong marinig.
I followed this stones and it led me to two people talking. This is what I hate the most. Eavesdropping on someone else's conversation.
I was about to take a step back and leave but my feet won't move a inch.
"Hindi ko maintindihan Ice. Why do you look so affected sa break up nyo?" It was Blue's voice.
"Shut up Blue. Bat ka ba nandito?" Ice said.
"Obviously, to give you company. And as I was saying...why are you so affected?"
"I'm not going to answer your question." Madiin na sabi ni Ice.
"Oh My God! Are you in love with her?"
"Blue, please shut up. Will you?"
"You are! You are in love with her! Unbelievable!" I heard steps but I didn't budge. I don't care kung makita nila ako dito.
"It was just a dare! I told you to make her fall in love with you, diba? Sabi ko, kapag napa oo mo na sya, you'll leave her. Pero di mo ginawa. Laro lang yun diba? You said you'll do everything to get me back. I told you to make her fall then all along you were the one falling?"
What...did I just heard? I'm sorry. Ano yun?
"Shut up Blue. I told you I'm serious about her!"
"Then why did you court her?"
"I'm leaving. Makipag usap ka sa mga halaman."
"What? Ice! Wait. Di pa tayo tapos."
Some couple of steps and Ice met my eyes.
"Hi." I said. Hindi ko alam kung saan nanggaling yung lakas ng loob ko. Nagawa ko pa talagang mag Hi sa kanila.
Ice looked bewildered. "Cream, have you been listening to us?" Ice asked. I gave him a faint smile.
"Look, don't believe her. She's a liar..."
"I'm not." Blue crossed her arms. "So you heard us, huh? Narinig mo din ba na inutusan ko lang si Ice na paglaruan ka? Poor you. Akala mo totoo, hindi pala. Habang naglalandian kayo, ako pumapalakpak sa galing umarte ni Ice. Habang ngumingiti ka, ako ngumingiti din sa galing na naman si Ice. You were just a game to him."
"Shut the fuck up Blue. I don't hit girls but I might hit you right now." Ice took some steps to get close to me.
"Look, don't listen to her, okay? I'll explain everything. I'll tell you the truth..I'll..."
"Is it true? Was I just a dare to you?" I asked.
"Cream, baby, no. You're not. Don't believe her, please. Listen to me, okay?"
"Oh come on, Ice... Maglolokohan pa ba tayo dito?" Sigaw ni Blue. "Tell her! Tell her how you pursued her because I told you so."
"What did I do to you?" I asked Blue.
"Don't listen to her. Let's go." Ice tried to pull me but I won't budge.
"What did I do to you, Blue? Why did you ask him to do that?" I asked calmly. She snorted and walk toward me. Ice went in between.
"Blue, ano ba? Umalis ka na!"
"Because I hate you. You scheming bitch!" She was about to slap me but I was faster. My palm reach hers before hers landed on my face.
"What the..." Blue want to get back on me but Ice stopped her.
"Blue, hit her or I'll swear you'll never see me again." Blue laugh.
"You can't do that! You're tied to me! You're mine! No one owns you! No one but me!" She screamed. I wanted to get scared. I never saw Blue as intensed as this. What happened to her?
"Cream, let's go." Hinawakan ni Ice ang palapulsuhan ko at hinigit ako palayo.
"Hey, don't run on me!" Blue said.
What the hell is happening here? I don't understand anything right now! Ano ba talaga ang totoo?