"Maxwell!" I jolt awake gasping and sit bolt upright in bed, my hand flying to my chest in an effort to calm my racing heart that's thudding away violently under my clammy skin; the dream had felt so real.
I was so sure that I would find him lying in the bed next to me.
My eyes flit around the room trying to find him but he's not here. I'm alone.
My hands are shaking and confusion floods me from all of the images running repeatedly through my head.
Shivers run over me and Goosebumps make an appearance all over my sensitive skin.
Why am I so drawn to him?
None of this makes any sense whatsoever and I'm becoming increasingly freaked out by everything that's happening.
The needs of my body outweigh my need to contemplate Maxwell further and I realise with a sudden clarity that I'm really thirsty, so I decide to get up and make my way down to the Great hall, where I imagine another huge feast will be laid on seeing as it's the final night of the festivities.
I throw a red cloth dress on in a hurry before pausing to admire it.
It's a rich deep crimson colour and I run my hands over the material and down my sides trying to imagine how it looks on me.
I plait my hair haphazardly and pin it using some pins that were left on the table in my room last night; trying to emulate the style that Florence did with such ease yesterday. I wish I had more talent with styling my hair; it's always been unkempt and unruly.
I complete the look with a gold jeweled belt that hangs down my front and sets the red colour of the dress off just right as far as I can make out.
I figure that I need to look the part and if I get to wear jewels and look like royalty in the process then who am I to argue?
I giggle to myself as my inner ramblings continue, before making my way out of the door and downstairs.
The hallway outside is calmly quiet and I slow to look out of a nearby window next to the stairs.
The view is breathtaking.
Without the Cathedral and many buildings and roads to distract me I can truly appreciate the surrounding hills and rolling lush green countryside. It's like something out of a Jane Austen novel.
The Sheep are grazing in the fields; I can make out the figures of people down below and in the nearby fields going about their daily business.
Everything is so calm and idyllic.
I drag in a deep breath and sigh in delight. If nothing else, this strange time travel experience has given me the chance to see and enjoy how beautiful this area was before modern man changed it irrevocably. I feel blessed in this moment.
I'm not disappointed when I arrive downstairs to see the tables covered in bowls of various amazing smelling foods. Everything from savoury oat biscuits, bread, cooked meats ranging in colour and size, and at the head table I even spot a whole stuffed boar with an apple in its mouth...gross.
I make a beeline for a huge pewter jug glistening with condensation on the nearest table. I fill a large goblet to the brim and sniff it discreetly to make sure it's not mead or anything else alcoholic.
My hands are still shaking from remembering my steamy dream of Maxwell and I down it in one hoping to dispel the strange emotions bubbling underneath.
Why was I dreaming of him?
It's not as if there is anything between us. Just a purely physical attraction...nothing more. He could never be interested in someone like me, he's an Earl and besides, that bitch Lady Alice would never allow anyone else the chance to get close enough to him to make any kind of impression.
The thought fills me with sadness and I turn to the head table, suddenly feeling the very urgent need to see him.
Maxwell is talking very eagerly to several guards in front of the head table, his back is to me but I can tell from a mile off that it's him just from his stance and apparent ease.
It gives me the chance to admire him from afar without the risk of him spotting me. His shoulders shake with laughter and he pats one of the soldiers on the back as they all fall about in a chorus of boisterous chortling, over something clearly very entertaining.
I find myself smiling along with them even though I have no idea what they're talking about.
He turns suddenly and unexpectedly towards me and I see his face as his eyes search the room for someone.
I suddenly wish that I could make him laugh like that, see his smile eclipse his beautiful face and chase away any worries he has. God what's happening to me... my chest feels heavy with emotion and tears prick my eyes; I blink them away and turn to see none other than Lady Alice glaring at me from a few feet away.
My heart skips a beat, not in fear but utter surprise at her proximity, what was she even doing watching me?
She stalks over to me as if she's the predator and I'm the prey and I have to say that's exactly how I feel seeing her face.
But I don't want to show her my shock and decide to plant my feet firmly on the ground, waiting for her to make the first move.
Her pace slows to a crawl as she reaches me and I realise that she's aware of other eyes in the room, always the calculating bitch.
Her eyes are flashing with fiery anger as she looks at me full of intent. She takes a deep breath and her face morphs into what any normal person would see as blank...but her body language speaks volumes to me and I know she's seething underneath this ridiculous exterior that she's projecting.
"Lady Cassandra, isn't it about time you were leaving? After all, the festivities are now over..." she practically growls, her accent so strong I struggle to understand every word she says and not appear stupid.
I know that I should bite my tongue to avoid trouble but I just can't help myself, her attitude and rudeness rub me up the wrong way.
"I will be leaving shortly, but tonight is the last night of the festivities and I intend to enjoy myself...to the Max" I say goading her, pleased with my play on words. Her eyes fly open in shock at my bravado and she grinds her teeth in annoyance.
"You will never have him" she says with menace, so quietly that I barely hear her. I would laugh at her reaction but something tells me that she won't take it well. "He doesn't lie with whores" she grits out and I choke on my own breath, unbelieving of her words. What is this bitch's problem? Her insult makes me see red and I grind my teeth trying to calm down but I can't. My temper overrides my sense of self preservation.
"Well it's a good thing I don't bloody want him isn't it!" I spit at her and she stares me down wide eyed, evidently deciding how to tackle the problem that I pose. God do I have a death wish? That was unbelievably stupid! What was I thinking? But before I can panic anymore she interrupts my thoughts again.
"Mark my words whore, you will regret trying to get in my way"
"Look, I don't know what your problem is but..."
"You are my problem English Whore!" she interrupts sharply and looks around to make sure she hasn't been heard. "Maxwell is mine! I will not let a cheap fucking whore like you get in the way of everything I have worked for"
"I'm not a whore!" I nearly shout back at her, where does she get off calling me that? She doesn't even know me.
"The man from behind the tent at the jousting tournament would seem to think otherwise" she says smirking at me, clearly with the impression that she has won our little argument.
I open my mouth to retort but she continues with a smirk on her face, "Maxwell told me everything. It would seem you have made quite the reputation for yourself in the castle, whore..." and she smiles menacingly to herself, clearly proud of her words.
With her mention of Max I step back unintentionally, as if she had hit me. It doesn't matter that I already knew he told her at some point before I entered the royal box...hearing her talk about it and mocking me are enough to shock me into submission, and she notices.
A cold calculating smile spreads over her face as she realises that she's won. She sidles closer to me and whispers in my ear words that leave me frozen,
"I know what you are Lady Cassandra...stay away from Maxwell. If you don't...I will end you."
And with that she backs away, stares at me darkly and curtseys before making her way towards Maxwell.
I feel sick.
I stand rooted to the same spot, not knowing what to do. The blood drains from my face and I look up in the direction she walked away to.
She's holding onto Maxwell's arm and smiling at me, bursting with pride at the power she has over me. My eyes flit to Max and he's watching me intently, his face is masked making it impossible to tell what he's thinking.
I wonder whether he saw any of our slanging match but he clearly doesn't care either way.
A chill goes through my body and I know with certainty that I have to get away from here, for my own safety. Soon... and what did she mean she knows who I am?
Surely she doesn't know the real truth, she must be clutching at straws to get rid of me.
Yes that's it. She can't know anything.
The thought makes me feel better and I take in a deep breath to steady my shot nerves.
I don't want her to know just how much her threat has bothered me so I take a quick seat at the nearest table and stock up on food, as much as I can eat.
I'll need a full stomach if I'm going to sneak out of here tonight, which reminds me I need to find Florence and get some sort of food sorted for my journey into the woods.
It doesn't take long for me to spot her across the hall and I jump up from my seat to ask her this favour. She's moving so fast around the hall that I almost don't spot her leaving via a small doorway, that I presume goes towards the kitchens. Now's my chance.
I stand and walk calmly past the head table as the doorway is off to its right, Alice is busy gossiping with another woman on her left and thankfully doesn't notice me but Maxwell catches my eye and I look hurriedly away before I get myself into any more trouble.
I don't have to follow Florence for long and after a few turns and steps I arrive in the packed kitchen being presided over by a rather stern looking woman waving her arms animatedly and shouting instructions.
"Don't let that milk curdle Mary! Fanny, make sure you take this tray to his Lordships table, Now!"
She notices me and shouts in front of everyone – "Can I help you Miss? Do you need something?"
All eyes turn to me and I freeze on the spot feeling quite the gooseberry, Florence pushes to the front of the girls nearly knocking a huge bowl of sweet smelling mixture onto the floor and catching it mid stride.
"Miss! You should have summoned me! Let me show you back to the hall" as she ushers me out into a nearby herb garden; the air is permeating Rosemary and Thyme and it conjures memories of Sunday roasts with my family.
The thought of them summons tears to my eyes and I struggle to hold them back, my nose stinging from the effort.
"Cassie, you can't be down here! It's not proper for a lady of esteem to attend the kitchen."
"I'm sorry Florence, I had no idea... I need your help" I say blinking quickly to get rid of the tears threatening to fall.
"Is everything alright?" She grips my arm in worry and I smile despite the situation I'm in.
"Yes, well actually no. I have a bit of a confession to make..."
"Yes..."
"Well, I'm not actually visiting with family nearby. I'm from somewhere a long way from here and I need to try and get back."
She pauses in thought and smirks at me "I knew there was something different about you – alright, how can I help?"
I'm relieved that she doesn't ask any in depth questions and quite surprised by her instant generosity, I know I haven't told her much but it's a relief to be able to tell someone that I don't belong here.
"Well I need some provisions and a means of carrying them – if that's not too much to ask?" I grimace as I know I must sound really underhanded to her but thankfully she doesn't seem to find anything odd in my request.
"Of course, I'll get some things together for you and leave them in your chamber later tonight."
"Perfect! Thank you for all your help Florence."
"Oh it's nothing! Don't trouble yourself!" She smiles and turns back into the kitchen doorway to continue with her chores, a sudden sad look on her face making me wonder what's causing it.
But she disappears back into the bowels of the castle as I'm left to think things over.
I decide to spend a bit more time in the herb garden before subjecting myself to Lady Alice again, and sit down on a nearby stool enjoying the smell of herbs and food being prepared.
No one disturbs me and I listen to the sounds of the castle and enjoy the peacefulness.
Later as I walk back in the hall I look for Maxwell hoping to see him for some odd reason; I feel like I need to look at him one last time before I leave for good.
But he's nowhere to be seen and neither is Lady Alice, thank god.
It's probably for the best that I don't see him but it still feels like a lead weight on my chest; I'm rapidly feeling more and more confused by my emotions. What is happening to me?
------------------------
It's dark outside when I decide that it's finally time to leave.
I have everything organised in the basket that Florence has graciously made up for me; she's packed bread, cheese, a small bottle of fresh M
milk and some oat biscuits which smell heavenly.
This should last me until I can find a safe place to sleep and gather some berries and water in the morning.
The halls are deserted after the celebrations have finally finished and I fly through the castle silently making my way outside.
I reach the entrance hall and have to stop abruptly when I hear someone talking inside one of the rooms I need to get past.
Inching around the corner I stop outside the doorway hoping that I can just walk past casually, pretending to be a maid or something but I stop short when I hear Maxwell and Alice talking.
"Won't you come to bed my Darling?" she drawls making my stomach turn.
"Alice, I hasten to remind you that we are not married and therefore it would be improper for me to sleep in a bed with you."
"But we will be married one day soon Maxwell! You know it as well as I do, you may as well get used to it!" she shouts in anger with her accent becoming stronger the angrier she gets. I hear footsteps shuffle inside the room and move slightly back in case someone comes out, but no one emerges and she appears to try a different tact.
"Maxwell, Darling. You know that my father has promised me to you as your bride and your king wills our union. Why wait until we are married for me to pleasure you?" she pauses and I hear more muffled movement around the room before she continues "I can be very persuasive when I want to be, my darling Maxwell."
He sighs and doesn't say anything for a long moment. My heart thuds in my rib cage as I listen intently.
The thought of Maxwell giving in and sleeping with that bitch doesn't sit well with me but I don't have time to examine my feelings before he suddenly speaks.
"I have work to do Alice; I'm busy and very tired."
"Bastardo! Mark my words Maxwell, you will share my bed someday!" and with that she storms from the room in the direction of the bedrooms.
I slip into an alcove hiding from view but luckily she doesn't seem to be aware of anything bar her own anger; she mutters furiously away to herself in indecipherable Spanish that fades to a low whisper as she disappears into the darkness of the castle.
I breathe a sigh of relief as she vanishes, feeling ridiculously pleased that Maxwell turned her down, serves her right.
I creep past the door and peer inside, noticing that it's a small study complete with desk and bookshelf.
Maxwell is leaning over the fireplace, both hands placed on the wall above, staring into the flames absentmindedly. One side of his gorgeous stubbled face is highlighted wonderfully by the flickering fire, his shoulders are broad and his silhouette is imposing and enticing, all at the same time.
I stand and stare entranced by his body and the way he holds himself.
I can tell he's tense and preoccupied with whatever is in his thoughts and I have the sudden urge to go to him and comfort him.
But that's ridiculous, what am I thinking. I shake my head trying to clear these silly thoughts from my head.
I can't stand here forever staring so I reluctantly turn and sneak away making my way past the guards, snoring away in their drunken stupor – great help they'll be if the castle is attacked!
I see a pile of fur cloaks and grab the nearest one which is actually very well fitted and sort of elegant. I feel terrible for taking it but I really have no option.
The grass is damp under my feet and I pull my borrowed cloak around my shoulders savoring the last remnants of warmth from the castle fires; the air is crisp and fresh and I take in a deep lungful willing myself to be strong for whatever comes next.