I woke up the next morning not knowing what to expect. I opened my eyes and felt the cold breeze coming from the big glass window in front of the guest room's bed. I looked around. I had a funny dream last night.
But wait? Was it a dream? Pinakiramdaman ko ang sarili ko. My eyes widened with awe when I felt that muscular arms around my waist. I also felt something hard poking my behind. I slowly turned my head around and that was when I realized that I wasn't dreaming last night. Natitigilan ako.
Yllak was beside me – he was asleep. My mouth fell open. Looking at him right now makes me feel – we'll I don't really know what or how to feel. Lalo pang nanlaki ang mga mata ko nang hatakin niya ako papalpit sa kanya. My face was now resting on his chest while his hand found my breast. I moaned softly. Was he already awake? I stared at him. He seemed to be sleeping. Nakapatong lang ang kamay niya sa dibdib ko. Kung may makakakita sa amin ngayon – they'd think that we – you know – but we didn't – but last night while he was lashing his tongue in and out of my core – I have asked myself if I am ready for this.
Would I want to give him my virginity? I bit my lower lip. I wonder if he knows that I'm still a virgin. Ayaw niya kaya ng virgin? Is that the reason why he chose to sleep rather than to take me?
"Hmm..." He stirred a bit. Yllak looked like an angel sleeping like that. Para bang hindi siya gagawa ng masama. Kusang tumaas ang kamay ko para haplusin ang mukha niya. I wonder what's going inside his mind. I made a mental note to talk to him after he wakes up. We need to clarify things fast bago pa ako mauwi sa confusion.
"Yllak..." I called him. He didn't move. "Yllak!" Pinisil ko ang ilong niya pero wala pa rin. I stared at him again. Bumaba ang tingin ko sa collar bone niya. Napangisi ako nang mapansin ko ang tattoo niya doon. Hinaplos ko ang marking iyon – tulad rin iyon ng tattoo niya sa v-line niya. I wonder what that means. Alam kong kapareho lang iyon nang tattoo niyang nakita ko noon.
My hands travelled down his chest down to his abs. Pinaglaya ko ang kamay ko doon. Natutuwa akong maramdaman ang malumanay na pagbaba at pagtaas ng kanyang tyan. He looked so peaceful.
Finally, I reached his v-line. Bahagya akong kumawala sa yakap niya. I touched those lines very carefully – I was afraid that he would wake up – matatapos kaagad ang explorations ko. Nanlaki ang mga mata ko nang biglang may humawak sa palapulsuhan ko. Tumaas ang tingin ko. He's awake. He was looking at me. My mouth parted a bit.
"Good morning, baby." Parang gusto kong mapakagat-labi sa boses niyang iyon. His bedroom voice is so damn sexy – I felt hot – erotic hot already. Hinatak niya ako papunta sa kanya – next thing I know I was on top of him. Tiningnan ko ang sarili ko. Noon ko lang napagtanto ang hitsura ko.
I was wearing my lingerie but my breasts are bared. Kitang-kita iyon ni Yllak. Ngumisi siya. Gumala ang kamay niya sa katawan ko – particularly near my ribs – where my tattoo is located.
"What does this mean?" He asked. His forefingers were on my mark – touching it back and forth – making me want to moan.
"Freedom." I answered. "Thos-e a-are Greek characters." I bit my lower lip. Why the hell am I feeling like this? Bakit kahit anong gawin ni Yllak, erotic ang dating? He smiled lazily.
"What do you wanna do today?" I asked him. I wanted to make some conversation – kahit ano na lang basta mawala ang tension sa katawan ko.
"You." He grinned. I gasped. He laughed. Noon ko pa naririnig ang tawa niya but right now, his laughter is the sexiest sound I have ever heard!
Ano bang ginawa ni Yllak sa akin?
"Umayos ka nga!" Sigaw ko. I sighed. I looked at him. Nakaunan sa ulo niya ang kanang kamay niya. Tinititigan niya lang ako. He caressed my shoulder.
"Whatever you like, baby, as long as I could be with you." What he said touched my heart. He wanted to be with me.
"I'll make you pasyal na lang." Sabi ko. "This is your first time in Greece so we'll go around."
"I want to stay in bed with you all day..." He said huskily. Hinampas ko ang dibdib niya at saka pinanlakihan siya ng mata. Inayos ko na ang sarili ko.
"Mag-ready ka na. We'll eat breakfast."
"How about I eat you instead?" He even winked at me. Namula na naman ang mukha ko. The memories of last night came back to me like a tsunami. Mabilis na lumabas ako ng silid niya at pumasok sa kwarto ko. Mabilis akong tumakbo sa kama at doon nahiga. I looked at the ceiling –I was thinking.
Why am I feeling like this? Was it because of the fact that he had tasted me already or was it because I like him?
I do like him. I grew up with him. He had taken care of me. He was there during my darkest time. He is my brother but then what he did to me last night – it didn't feel weird at all. A part of me also wanted that to happen. I want Yllak. I don't know why. I guess I've always wanted to feel love.
I closed my eyes and remembered something.
I am your first kiss.
Muli kong naimulat ang aking mga mata.
How the hell did that happen? Si Zach ang first kiss ko. But then, that part of me wanted to believe that Yllak was indeed my first kiss. Kung paano, hindi ko alam. Itatanong ko na lang sa kanya mamaya.
I sighed. I remembered Yllak's sexy laugh.
Kumuha ako ng unan at itinakip iyon sa mukha ko.
"Ahhhhhh! What the fuck did he do to me?!"
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Yllak and I went to town that day. I wore my white flowery blouse and a pair of shorts. Siya naman ay naka-sando shirt, khaki pants na brown tapos ay naka-suot ng rayban. He looked so hot. His presence demands attention. Sabagay lahat naman ng Consunji ay ganoon. When they walk into the room, kahit wala silang sinasabi, mapapalingon ka, mapapabuntong-hininga at mapapangalumbaba.
Parang ngayon, gusto ko lang umupo sa isang tabi at titigan siya. He really looked yummy. He looked like a model that just got out of a photo shoot.
"You're drooling." He said to me. My eyes widened. Hinampas ko siya.
"Hindi kaya!" Sigaw ko. Nag-iwas ako ng tingin. I am blushing again. Bigla ay inakbayan ako ni Yllak. M
"Uy, pikon ka ba, baby ko?" He kissed my cheek. I gasped again. Tuwing nadidikit ako sa kanya ay parang nakakakita ako ng fireworks. Hindi lang iyon, nag-iinit ang pakiramdam ko. I want him to do what he did to me last night. I want to feel his lips against mine. I want him to wrapped me around his muscular arms and take me because right now, I know that iof he ever makes his move I'll give in.
"Baby..." He called me. I looked at him.
"Yllak, gusto ko ng vanilla ice cream." Ngumuso ako. Yllak looked at me. Kunot na kunot ang noo niya.
"Naglilihi ka na agad? Wala pa akong ginagawa!" Humahagikgik na sabi niya. Pinaghahampas ko ang balikat niya.
"Nakakainis ka! Ang kapal mo! Wala naman akong sinabi! Sabi ko gusto ko lang ng ------"
I didn't even had the chance to finish my sentence because right there and then he kissed my lips – in broad daylight – in front of all the Greeks, tourists and sellers in the market – his lips met mine and I was able to feel that twitter pottering sensation I felt last night. I wrapped my arms around him, closed my eyes and gave in. I answered every stroke of his divine but sinful mouth with the same hotness.
Yllak – no doubt about it – might be an iceman at time but he is as hot as the sun. Napamulat ako nang maramdaman ko ang mga palad niya sa loob ng blusa ko. He was kneading my breasts – in public – dammit!
Napapasong lumayo ako sa kanya. "Y-yllak..." Hindi ako makapagsalita.
"Dammit." He cursed. Napasabunot siya sa kanya sarili tapos ay ngumisi na naman. "Nasaan ba iyang vanilla ice cream na iyan?" Luminga-linga siya. Sinundan ko lang siya ng tingin hindi nagtaggal ay nakita kong pumunta siya sa loob ng isang ice cream shop. Naupo naman ako sa labas ng ice cream shop at hinintay siya. Hindi nagtaggal ay lumabas na siya, he was holding two cones of of ice cream pero ang pinakanakakunot ng noo ko ay ang isang Greek na babaeng kasama niya palabas. They were talking. The woman had blonde hair and a pair of blue eyes. She was looking at Yllak and Yllak was grinning sheepishly at her. Naikuyom ko ang palad ko.
"Thanks, honey! You're so sweet!" Hinagkan pa ng hitad na iyon ang pisngi ni Yllak. Naupo na siya sa tabi ko at binigay sa akin ang isang cone na hawak niya.
"Hey, baby." He used that tone again. Inirapan ko siya. "Bakit?"
"Tinatanong mo pa! Sino iyon?! Namili ka lang ng ice cream tapos may kalandian ka nang iba?!" Idinikit ko sa noo niya ang ice cream na binili niya. "Ang landi – landi mo! 'Wag na sanang tumayo iyan! Kainis!"
I walked out. Gigil na gigil ako. Naiinis ako kay Yllak. Ang kapal ng mukha niya! Matapos niya akong pagsamantalahan kagabi, lalandi siya ngayon?!
Naramdaman ko ang kamay niya sa braso ko. I shook his hand off and continued walking.
"Baby!" He called me.
"Don't call me baby!" I screamed at him. Natigil ako sa paglakad nang bigla siyang mapahalakhak. Napalingon ako. He was in the middle of the street. Nakapamaywang tapos tawa nang tawa. Ang gunggong mukhang masayang-masaya.
"At bakit ka tumatawa?!" Pasigaw na tanong ko. Natigil siya at inilang hakbang ako.
"Because you're jealous. It means that I mean something to you. Hindi lang basta kapatid – it's more than that." Sabi pa niya. Wala na ang ngisi sa mukha niya pero kitang-kita naman ang kasiyahan sa mga mata niya.
I asked myself. Nagseselos nga ba ako? I shook my head. Why would I be jealous? But then, why am I acting like this. Siguro nga nagseselos ako. Pinamaywangan ko siya.
"Eh ano? I kissed you back – that means you have my mark."
Kumunot ang noo niya. "You're not a Consunji anymore, Leighton. Hindi applicable sa akin ang mark na iyon." Humahakbang siya palapit. I braced myself. I was thinking of kissing him. I wanted to prove to him that he belongs to me.
If the Consunji men are possessive and ruthless – I can be like that too. Palaki ako ni Sancho Consunji at ang isang bagay na pinakanatatandaan ko sa lahat ng itinuro niya sa akin – what's mine is mine, and no one can ever touch what's mine.
Applicable kay Yllak ang rule na iyon dahil akin naman siya at iyong nangyari kagabi – we both wanted it. He was right – it's not incest – we're not blood related. I have been emancipated from being a Consunji – but still that trait of mine isn't gone.
I am as possessive as hell when it comes to my properties.
Nang makalapit si Yllak sa akin ay nginisihan ko siya. "Who says it's the Consunji mark?" I gave him a light kiss on his lips. I nipped his lower lip, then finally kissing him fully. He kissed me back – like he was marking me, but then again he has the wrong idea because he's not the one doing the marking.
I am marking him as my property.
I ended the kiss and looked at him – eye to eye.
"You are mine, Consunji. You just had the Santillan seal."
"Can you mark me all over, baby?" He asked. I grinned.
"Just wait for it..." I winked and turned my back. Ang puso ko, naghuhurumentado.
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The day ended – as much as I want for it to go on and on, kailangan pa ring matapos noon. Buong araw lang kaming nag-ikot nki Yllak sa Thira, he seemed to be enjoying himself. Wala nang araw nang bumalik kami sa mansion. I took a quick shower. Hindi pa rin mawala ang ngiti sa labi ko.
Hindi ko talaga alam kung bakit ganoon ang epekto ni Yllak sa akin. He makes me want to do things I never thought I could do. Kanina noong nagpunta kami sa stone bridge, walang sabi-sabing hinalikan niya ako – hindi basta halik. French kiss – the catch was we were standing in the middle of the bridge – in front of many people. Alam kong pinagtitinginan kami, ilang beses kong sinubukang sabihin iyon pero wala siyang pakialam. In the end, I was carried away by his ministrations. I kissed him again. Our tongues, tonguing. Natigil lang kami nang magpalakpakan ang mga Griyego sa paligid. Yllak grinned at them and yelled.
I got the girl!
Halos mamatay ako sa kahihiyan pero hindi ko naman maitatanggi na kinikilig ako.
Nang maayos ko ang sarili ko ay lumabas ako ng silid. Nagbilin ako sa maids na maghanda ng hapunan. Habang hinihintay iyon ay muli akong umakyat para katukin si Yllak. Bukas ang silid niya. Pumasok na ako.
When I got in, nakita ko siyang kalalabas lang ng bathroom. He was only wearing a towel that was wrapped around his body. Our eyes met. Natatandaan ko ang ganitong tagpo. I was only eighteen when I saw him almost naked like this – it did bother me.
"Hey baby."
"Manahimik ka!" Sigaw ko. Ngumisi na naman siya sa akin. Naupo siya sa kama at saka inilahad ang kamay niya. Wala sa sarili na lumapit ako at inabot ko iyon. He pulled me in so I could sit on his lap. I wrapped my arms around his neck. I caressed the tattoo on his collar bone.
"Kamukha nito iyong nasa vline mo." I said.
"Hmmn..." He planted a kiss on my shoulder then he buried his face on my neck. His left hand miraculously found its way to my breast. Pinigilan ko siya.
"Yllak..." I made him look at me. "'wag ganito. Mag-usap muna tayo."
My eyes widened when I felt him hardening against my behind. I bit my lower lip. Inaakit na naman niya ako.
"Ano bang pag-uusapan natin? Why not just kiss me and just go with the flow." He nipped my earlobe. Nakadama ako ng kuryente. Tinulak ko siya sa dibdib.
"Wait..." Sabi ko. I sighed. He looked at me. "Why are you doing this?"
"Doing what?"
"This! You're kissing me, last night you... we'll – You know what you did last night!"
"Bakit? Hindi mo ba iyon gusto? You were moaning! You even grinded you hips because my tongue---"
"Shut up..." namula ang mukha ko. I sighed.
"Iyong totoo. Ano tayo? Hindi na lang tayo basta magkapatid ngayon. "
Napuno ng katahimikan ang paligid. Hinihintay ko siyang sumagot. He, then, after a while sighed and smiled.
"I was twelve when I realized that I like you." Panimula niya. "Fourteen when I realized that I love you – not as a sister but as you are Yna. Magkapatid pa lang tayo, mahal na kita. Mahal hindi bilang kapatid o kaibigan o kung anuman. Mahal kita bilang ikaw."
He took my hand and played with my thumb. I know what that means. Bigla kong naalala ang lahat ng mga pagkakataon na pinaglaruan niya ang daliri ko.
I asked nanay what that means and she told me that for her playing with the thumb means eternal love.
"Mahal kita, Yna. Kahit na ikaw na si Leigh ngayon. Nothing matters, just you and the fact that my heart beats for you. I love you..."