Even hours after their hasty, daring departure, Trixie Montgomery had to admit the journey still hadn’t lost any of its fun. Music blasting from the stereo, A/C blasting from the vents, bags of Crazy Core Skittles bought from gas stations forever in their supply…now this was the way to travel. Not in a stuffy Cadillac with Mr. and Mrs. Boring while classical music - oh, the horror - drifted quietly from the speakers and everyone sat in stiff silence, broken occasionally by her mother’s need to yell at her once more and warn her about not getting into trouble and -
She shuddered like a soldier with a Vietnam flashback. No, that was all behind her now. She was riding off to her future, like the end of Snow White when she abandons her lovable dwarf companions and gets onto the prince’s horse so he can carry her off into the sunset. And that’s exactly what she would do. She would leave her companions - a little more reluctantly than Snow White did, who seemed to have always mysteriously and suspiciously all but forgotten about her closest friends at the end of the movie - for a bigger and brighter future.
“Want some Skittles?” Leo Pattinson asked, mouth full.
“Sure,” she said, “always.” Then she held out her hand and he dumped a mound of the colorful candies into her palm.
Trixie had always had a soft spot in her heart for Leo, who was like her older brother. In the sixth grade, when Joshua Wilson called her a whore, Leo had kicked his ass and ultimately received a three-day, in-school suspension. In the eighth grade, when he was trying to teach Trixie how to skateboard (which had resulted in a broken ankle), he carried her back to his house, paternally shushing her worried sobs, and sat with her in the back seat while Mrs. Pattinson drove them to the emergency room. Just a couple months ago, when Trixie’s mother had finally caved and bought her the black and white Havanese puppy she’d been pining over, she had named it Leo after him.
But their relationship had been - would always be - strictly platonic. They were brother and sister, and when someone would ask, “Are you two dating?” she would wrinkle her nose as though she and Leo were actually blood relatives.
“Man, can you believe it?” Maxine Thornton said, turning around in the passenger seat to smile at Trixie, who was sandwiched between Leo and Geoffrey Higgins. “Our little girl is all grown up!”
Geoffrey sniffled and pretended to wipe away a tear. “I know. Hold me, Leo. Hold me.” He stretched across Trixie’s lap and collapsed into Leo’s arms, who patted him soothingly on the back and whispered encouraging little “I know’s” into Geoffrey’s ear. The girls cracked up at the scene.
“But seriously, though, can you believe it?” Maxine said. “One day, you’re getting kicked out of boarding school, and the next, you’re being shipped off to the best school in the whole damned country!”
Trixie looked at Maxine, really looked at her, drinking in her face, trying to preserve it in her memory forever. She never wanted to forget her friends. Yes, she would video chat them as often as she could and see them during summer break, but…there was a long period in between now and then where she wouldn’t get to see them in person, and it would be crime to forget Maxine’s black pixie cut and the way it flopped into her hazel eyes, the six piercings she had in each ear. Hailey, with her flaming auburn hair that she had to keep armpit length or else it grew wild and unruly, parted so that it fell over one of her two cobalt blue eyes, the smattering of freckles across her nose, her cupid’s bow lips. Leo, with his messy head of hair a dark blonde and eyes the color of a new penny. And Geoffrey, sweet little Geoffrey, with his brunette curls and impish green stare, framed with eyelashes so long it was a wonder they didn’t tangle when he blinked.
“I bet they have the best parties,” Hailey sighed enviously, bringing Trixie back to reality. “If not, they’re about to.” She caught Trixie’s eye in the rearview mirror and winked.
“Damn straight, they will!” Maxine cried, pumping her fist in the air. “You teach those rich bitches how to rock!”
“You have to promise to video chat me every day,” Geoffrey said. “I’ll make sure your parents don’t forget to feed your dog.”
“Yeah, and while you’re there, if you see any hot chicks, try and get their numbers for me,” Leo said with a grin.
“What, are Maxine and I not good enough for you?” Hailey said, pretending to be offended. “Anyways, yeah, I’ll write to you, like, five times a minute.” She giggled.
“And I’ll write to you, too,” Maxine said, “as long as you write to me.”
“Alright,” Trixie said, feeling overwhelmed. “Alright, I’ll keep in touch with all you commoners.”
“Hey, I could’ve gotten into that school, too, had I applied!” Leo said.
“How?” Maxine laughed.
“I dunno, however Trixie did.”
“How did Trixie do it?”
“Yeah, how did you do it?”
“My unbelievable talent,” Trixie said haughtily, though she had just been asking herself the very same question. She had no talent, and if she did have talent, she didn’t know because all she did was party. But she could figure all that out when she got to school…or she could just party some more.
“Man, you are so full of shit,” Hailey said, shaking her head.
“I’m gonna miss you,” Geoffrey sighed. Maxine nodded in mournful agreement.
“No,” Trixie barked. “No, don’t start this. ‘Cuz pretty soon, someone’s gonna start crying and I won’t wanna be in the car anymore.”
“You won’t have to be in the car,” Maxine said, face lighting up into a smile. “We’re here!” “What?!” Trixie cried, leaning forward to get a better look at the tiny white thing in the distance. As they approached it, it grew larger and larger until they could make out the large, modern shape of the Institution looming in the distance.
“Holy hell!” Hailey gasped in awe. “It’s huge!”
“Yeah it is!” Trixie yelled. “State of the art labs, on-campus houses, a private beach, and three Starbuckses!” She pumped her fist into the air. “And I go here!”
***
“I’m sorry, what did you say your name was again?”
“Foster. Carl Foster.”
“Carl Foster…” the receptionist muttered, typing away on her keyboard.
“And I’m Frankie,” Frankie offered with a wink.
“Look, can we hurry this up? I have animals waiting in the car,” Carl said, tapping his feet impatiently. His muddy Converse looked out of place on the pristine marble floor. He looked so out of place in the receptionist’s office, where everything was a crisp, fresh minimalist white.
“Animals?” the receptionist asked. “What kind?”
“A frog, a snake….” He looked down at his tattoo, a hissing snake wrapped around his sinewy forearm. “Oh, and some bunnies.”
“Bunnies?”
“Yeah, they’re for the snake.”
“You can see my snake anytime,” Frankie said. She chose to ignore him.
“Well, Mr. Foster, I have the chart pulled up right here and I can’t see anything wrong with your current housing arrangement.”
“Nothing wrong?! Look who I’m housed with!” Carl cried.
“…And?”
“And, do you see a Franklyn Nelson anywhere on that list?”
“Look, Mr. Foster, students aren’t always housed with the people they came with. The reason you and Mr. Nelson -”
“Call me Frankie.”
“- weren’t placed in the same house is because the point of the Institution is to meet new people and -”
“No, it’s not,” Carl argued. “The point of the Institution is to ‘hone my talents.’”
“It’s one of the points,” the receptionist said. “Sir, I don’t make the arrangements, I just print them out.”
“But you don’t understand, I need to be housed with Frankie -”
“I’m afraid there’s nothing I can do -”
“But he has a mental disorder -”
“Who doesn’t?” the receptionist said wistfully. Then she sat up suddenly. “What sort of condition would he have that you’d need to be with him at all times?”
“Pornography addiction.”
“That’s not true!” Frankie interjected. Then he gave the receptionist a quick up-and-down. “Unless, of course, you want it to be.”
“Very humorous, Mister Foster, but like I said, there’s nothing I can do.” She folded her hands on top of her desk. “And that’s that.”
“If I may, Carl, I’d like to take over,” Frankie said.
“Alright, I’m gonna go check on Oscar.”
“Oscar?” he heard the secretary ask.
“The snake,” Frankie explained, the last thing Carl heard before he walked out into the suffocating heat.
Carl’s black Trans Am was still parked outside. He opened the door to the backseat and gently lifted the towel off of the cage.
“Hi, Oscar.”
The snake hissed.
“I know, you hate the cage, you hate the towel, you miss home.” Oscar flicked his tongue. “But you gotta understand, buddy, I have to share a house with Frankie. And you’ll thank me later. Do you really want to live with people who don’t like snakes?” He knelt down so he and Oscar were face-to-face. “I know I certainly don’t. But whenever Frankie comes out, hopefully, we can go to our new house and I can put you back into your tank. Maybe even feed you a nice, fat bunny.” He rubbed the top of the tank paternally and said, in the very voice someone would use to talk to a baby or a lovable puppy, “You’d like that, wouldn’t you, Oscar? Yes, you would! Yes, you would!”
“Really, Carl?” Frankie said, appearing suddenly behind them.
“Frankie!” Carl said, rising to his feet. He pulled the towel back over the cage. “Did you do it, man?”
“No, I couldn’t convince - YES!” He pulled the fresh chart out from behind his back and thrusted it into Carl’s hands; it was still warm from the printer. “Check it out! There we are, house ten, right by one of the Starbuckses!”
“HELL YEAH!” Carl cried. “How’d you do it?”
“Er…that’s not important…”
“Hey, Frankie!” the receptionist called, sticking her head out the window. Her ash blonde hair was falling out of its neat chignon and her red lipstick was smeared. “You forgot to give me your number!”
“You didn’t!” Carl said, amused.
“I didn’t…well, not yet, anyways.” He winked, fished a cheap Papermate pen out of his pocket, and strolled back up to the window, where he scribbled something on her arm and swaggered away.
“Thanks!” the receptionist said.
“Thanks!” Carl said.
“You’re welcome!” Frankie called.
“Man, I can’t believe you just made out with the receptionist!”
“Her name is Yvonne,” Frankie said, hopping into the passenger seat. “Now let’s roll.”
***
As much as Charlotte hated to admit it, the Institution was a pretty nice place.
She drug her broken trunk over the threshold of house seven and, of course, it caught on the uneven floor and flew open, regurgitating her clothing once more.
“Son of a bitch!” she whined, kneeling down amidst the panties to gather her things.
“You called?”
She whipped around to see a Tinkerbell look-a-like emerge from the hallway, wearing frayed denim short shorts that might as well have been underwear and a neon pink tank top. She was grinning.
“I’m Trixie,” she said. “Trixie Montgomery.”
“Charlotte Parker. My trunk is a piece of shit.” She flipped it right side up and pulled it towards her.
“Let me give you a hand,” Trixie said, and knelt down. “You new here, too?”
“Yeah, I got kicked out of my old school.”
“You shittin’?” Trixie asked, grinning once more. “Me too!”
“No way!” Charlotte said, allowing herself a small smile. After all, she couldn’t help it; this Trixie girl’s personality was infectious. “What’d you do?”
“I went to this stupid boarding school in New York. I was there for summer school because I failed Algebra, and it was pretty boring, so I decided to throw a party, right? So, I gathered some buddies of mine and completely trashed the boys’ dormitory. It was great. Jell-O shots, ecstasy…the works. They’re still talking about it.” She paused for a moment to smile proudly at herself. “What’d you do?”
“Some douchebag was insulting my family, so I punched him.” Charlotte shrugged. “He had it coming.”
“And they expelled you? That seems a little too harsh of a crime. An in-school suspension, maybe, but not expulsion.”
“Well, it’s not the first time I got into a fight at that school, so…” she drew her index finger along her throat, pantomiming slitting it. “My parents flipped. I’ve never seen them so mad in my life. I began to realize why that guy was insulting my family.”
“Wow, tough break.”
“Yeah, but in my parents’ defense, this wasn’t the first time I’ve been kicked out of a school for fighting. But still.”
“Damn, muscles!”
Charlotte smiled even more widely. Trixie had a way of making her feel strangely proud of her badass status. “I just don’t like people. Speaking of, anyone else here yet but us?”
“Nope. The rooms are first come, first serve, so if I were you, I’d pick one out now.”
“Alright. Wanna give me a hand?”
“Sure. You lead the way.” She picked up one end of the trunk, careful to keep the top from swinging open.
“Thanks.” Charlotte grabbed the other end and backed into the hallway. “Which room do you recommend?”
“Well, only two of the rooms have a view, and I took one of them, so I guess the other one.”
“What is it a view of?” She rounded the corner and entered the room next to Trixie’s.
“That.” Trixie grinned, dropped her half of the trunk, and walked over to the tiny window. Curiously, Charlotte followed. “Say hello to the boys of house eight.”
There was only one boy currently standing by the house, and he was blonde, tanned, and shirtless. And good looking. Very good looking.
“I haven’t seen any of his house mates yet, but if they’re anything like this guy, we got the best rooms.”
Charlotte smiled in spite of herself, not because the guy was attractive, because she wasn’t the type to ogle men from her bedroom window, but because if her mother knew that she’d sent her to a school where hot men were running wild….
“Damn right we did!” Charlotte raised her hand to high five Trixie’s. “This school is gonna be great!”