Lorelei's POV
"Truth or Dare?" Tanong agad ni Alistair nang tumapat ang bote ng C2 kay Loki. I know for sure that the latter isn't interested in this kind of games. He's probably thinking 'what a waste of time,' but Jamie somehow managed to convince Loki to join the game.
"Truth." Loki answered. Truth is the safer choice, anyway.
"Do you—" Jamie was about to ask, but Alistair cut her off.
"Do you like Lorelei?"
"Huh? Ba't ako nadamay?" Reklamo ko pero walang pumansin sa'kin. Lahat ay nakatuon sa lalaking naka-poker face pa rin kahit siya na ang nasa hot seat.
"Like her?"
"You know, as someone more than a friend." Jamie continued, also curious about Loki's answer.
"No." Loki simply answered.
Aray ha?
"Bakit niyo ba kasi tinatanong pa eh obvious naman na!" Sabi ko at natawa.
"Hm. Oo nga naman. Okay, spin the bottle, Loki!" Jamie said, anticipated on who's the next victim.
Loki spun the bottle and when it stopped, Jamie was excited because she thought that she's next but to her dismay, it was pointed on Freya who's unexpectedly beside her, so Loki had to spin the bottle again...
And it pointed at me.
"Truth or Dare?" Loki asked.
"Truth." Knowing Loki, baka kung ano pang life-threatening dare ang ibigay niya sa'kin pag 'yon ang pinili ko!
"Do you like me?"
I am dumbfounded at Loki's question. I expect him asking me something like, what happened to your previous high school or something like that.
"Like you?" I asked, copying what he previously did, but immediately regretted it.
"As someone more than a friend." He said and it took me a few seconds to answer his question.
"No. No!" Halos pabulong kong nasambit. Natawa nalang ako.
I hate lying.
---
Sa sumunod na araw, papasok na sana ako sa clubroom pero nakabukas na ito at narinig ko ang usapan nila Loki at Jamie. Sana hindi nalang.
"This is strange and I know it's too fast. It's just... New to me; this weird feeling I get when I'm with you. I found it absurd when others say it, until I felt it with you, the butterflies in my stomach. I think I love you. No, I know I love you. Will you be my girlfriend?"
"Ang sweet naman Loki! Yes, I will." Jamie said, laughing.
I almost stumbled as I walked back and away from the room, but I bumped onto something— or should I say, someone.
I faced that someone and found Alistair. I think he's also about to go inside the clubroom, but he probably heard their conversation as well. I felt a tear dropping from my eye so I immediately wiped it and ran away. Anywhere away from that clubroom. I feel suffocated near there.
I reached the end of the hallway, I couldn't run anymore. I feel so tired but I know it isn't because of running, it isn't even because of crying. It's because of Loki, of liking him. I never really planned to have romantic feelings for someone this early, I wanted to focus on my studies, and the QED club! Pero wala eh, wala manlang siyang kamalay-malay na bawat galaw niya, bawat oras na magkasama kami, bawat pagtama ng mga mata namin, unti-unti na 'kong nahuhulog sa kanya.
Pagod na kong mahulog mag-isa na walang katiyakan kung saan ito patungo, kung mayroon bang sasalo sa'kin.
Nakarinig ako ng mga yapak patungo sa kinatatayuan ko. I know it's just Alistair but I need to make sure, so I looked at him, not minding if he sees my tearstained face.
As soon as he's just a stepped away from me, he closed the distance between us and wrapped me in his warm embrace.
"Al..." Wala akong masabi, naiyak nalang ako. Alistair has always been the assurance that I'm not alone.
"Just cry." He said and caressed my hair.
"Al..." I remembered all the times Jamie and Loki felt like they were a thing, when they would show their probable mutual attraction to one another, I didn't even know it was mutual. I was selfish, I thought Loki would never like anyone romantically.
"I know..." Alistair said as he caressed my hair. Mag-aangat na sana ako ng tingin sa kanya, pero idiniin niya lang ang mukha ko sa dibdib niya. Nakakahiya, basang basa na ang uniform niya dahil sa'kin. Kinuha ko ang panyo ko para punasan ang mukha ko.
"Am I that obvious?" Tanong ko matapos magpunas ng mukha.
"To someone observant, yes. I could see the way you stare at Loki unconsciously. The way you avert your gaze at Loki and Jamie. The way you looked down when Loki said he doesn't like you more than a friend yesterday. The way you sounded hurt when you lied about not liking Loki yesterday. The way you avoid eye contacts with Loki, as if you're afraid that he'll see through you— that he'll know your true feelings. I know almost every detail about you."
"Alistair, do you..." I asked. Matalinong tao si Al, alam kong alam niya kung anong tinutukoy ko. I wanted to look at his face to see the truth but he just kept pushing me to his chest.
"Mmhm. All this time, Lorelei. I thought you knew that. Ang unfair nga eh, ako ang nauna, pero sa kanya mo gustong pumunta." He said, sounding like he's smiling, pero alam kong hindi siya masaya.
"I'm sorry. Hindi ko rin alam. I guess it started when Loki saved me when I was abducted by Margarette Fernandez. It felt like he was my knight in shining armor." I laughed at my term. I noticed that I wasn't crying anymore.
"I tried neglecting those feelings since that I just met him. But day after day, I spend more time with him and he always got my attention. He's so mysterious. I have this feeling like, I wanna know him more. I wanted to know everything about him, until I realize it wasn't just curiosity, it's already... Love..." I continued. Seconds passed by but Al didn't say anything. I was about to look at him but he pushed me again at his chest.
He sighed and I felt a liquid run down my cheeks. Obviously, it isn't rain because we're inside. It could be a lizard peeing on us but... I know it's Alistair's tears.
"Are you crying?" I asked.
"No..."
"Did I hurt you?"
"No..."
"Are you lying?"
"Yes..."
"I'm sorry..." I said and hugged him tighter.
"Alam ko na naman. Dati pa. Na hanggang kaibigan lang talaga. Oh baka nga bestfriends eh." Sabi niya at bahagyang natawa.
"Basta tatandaan mo, nandito lang ako. Handang maging rebound." He said and laughed, finally letting go of me.
Tinignan ko kaagad ang mukha niya at napansin kong pinahid na niya ang luha niya at hindi halatang umiyak siya. So, kaya pala niya ako tinutulak sa dibdib niya ay para hindi ko makita ang mukha niya.
"No. Hindi ko gagawin yun." Sabi ko at bumuntong hininga bago nagsalita ulit. "Maglalakad-lakad lang ako. A-absent ako sa mga subjects ngayong hapon." Hindi ko na hinintay ang sagot niya at tumalikod na agad.
---
Naglakad-lakad ako hanggang sa mapadpad ako sa isang parke. Napansin kong naliligaw na ako. Hindi ako ganoon gumagala o naglalakad dito sa probinsya kaya hindi ako masyadong pamilyar sa lugar na to.
Umupo ako sa isang bench and natulala.
So... Sila na ni Jamie?
Naiyak ako sa realisasyon na iyon. Alam kong wala naman talaga akong pag-asa kay Loki. Akala ko wala siyang interes sa pag ibig, pero masakit na malaman na mayroon pala, pero hindi para sa akin.
Humiga ako sa bench at niyakap ang bag ko.
---
Nagising ako nang may maramdaman akong lamok na kumagat sa akin. Napabalikwas ako nang makita kong madilim na ang paligid. Kinuha ko ang cellphone ko.
6:29 pm
5 missed calls from Jamie
13 missed calls from Alistair
1 missed call from Loki
1 missed call lang, huh.
Nagulat ako nang bigla itong tumunog. Lumabas ang pangalan ni Loki. Huminga muna ako ng malalim bago sinagot ang tawag.
"Hello?"
"Good morning." Sabi niya.
"Ha? Anong good morning?" Takang tanong ko. Tsaka, hindi ba dapat, "nasaan ka?" ang unang tanong niya?
"You've been sleeping in that bench for like, 6 hours."
"A-asan ka?!" Sabi ko at lumingon lingon sa paligid ngunit di ko siya nakita.
"I'm above." He said that caused me to look up.
"Loki!" I screamed when I saw him on a tree. He dropped the phone call. He did a hand gesture signaling me to come closer. I did. He jumped off the tree.
"Loki!" Napasigaw na naman ako. Bumagsak naman siya nang ligtas, pero nag-aalala pa rin ako dahil mataas-taas din ang pinagtalunan niya.
"Okay ka lang ba? Walang masakit?"
"How about you?" He asked softly just like his gaze on me. I felt conscious and looked away. Para bang nakikita niya kaluluwa ko, nararamdaman ang sakit sa puso ko. Humarap ulit ako sa kanya nang maalala ang stunt na ginawa niya.
"Stupid! That was so dangerous! You could've fallen wrongly."
"I already fell. But I'm sure, on the right person."
"Oh... Yeah. Kay Jamie." I said but I immediately tapped my mouth. I sounded so bitter!
"Jamie?" He asked with amusement is evident in his face.
"Bakit? Totoo naman diba?" Tanong ko sa kanya, para bang naghahamon ng away. 'Di ko rin alam bakit ba ang hilig-hilig kong saktan sarili ko.
"So you heard, huh?" He said as he bit his lip and smiled. I stared at him with wide eyes. I memorized every detail of that expression, it's something that Loki never, or maybe rarely does.
"Yeah... I heard. She said yes. Congrats!" I smiled at him, pero hindi ko ata kayang i-maintain ang ekspresyong 'to, nagliwas din ako ng tingin.
"You probably didn't hear the whole story."
"What do you mean?"
"I was just... practicing Jamie came in and I asked her to judge me, since she's a good actress. I just don't want to sound weird when I do the actual thing?" He explained.
"Huh? So... Hindi talaga kayo?" Gulat na tanong ko. He just nodded and laughed a bit, another expression of Loki to be remembered.
"Wait, actual thing? Sumali ka ba sa play o ano?"
"Uhm, nope." He said and looked away.
"Ha? Eh para saan yung practice?" I asked, and Loki sighed. Lah? Edi wag! Nagbuntong hininga ulit siya at humarap sa akin.
"Alam ko na ilang buwan pa lamang ang nakalipas nang tayo'y magkita, pero sigurado na ako, mahal kita."
Huh? TEKA LANG! Totoo ba 'to? He spoke in Filipino language? Bahagyang baduy ang linyahan niya pero dahil siya ang nagsabi, hindi ko mapigilang kiligin. Ang swerte naman ng pagsasabihan niya nito.
"Say something. It wasn't embarrassing on Jamie but it's too embarrassing to confess for real."
"Wait, for real? You mean..." I asked him and he smiled as a reply. Kung panaginip 'to, 'wag naman! Sana totoo.
"Since when?" I asked again, I am totally clueless.
"I'm uncertain. Matalino akong tao pero pagdating sa'yo parang laging hindi ko alam." I saw a faint red painted his cheeks. My mind is overloading, nagsasabay-sabay ang pagsisink-in ng mga sinasabi niya, pag-aalala ng facial expressions niya, at pag-iisip kung anong gagawin ko sa situwasyong 'to.
"Hey, say something. It took me lots of effort to say these, you know." He said with a slight pout, which made me laugh again. My eyes became watery. I can't believe it. This is very unlike Loki! Loki would never do something as cheesy as this.
"But I just did." Nagulat ako sa sinabi niya.
"Did I say that aloud?" I embarrassedly asked and looked away.
"Yes. Face me, say something, Lorelei Rios." He said. I quickly wiped away my tears and looked at him.
"Did you just really confess to me?" I asked.
"I love you." He just said.
"I... uhm..." Hindi ko kayang sabihin!
"It's okay, you don't need to say it. I can feel it." He smiled and hugged me.
"Wow. Are you really Loki?" I asked as I looked a him.
"Yes, this is Louis Kingsley Mendez, your boyfriend."
"Ha? Boyfriend ka diyan? Mahal din kita pero di ko sinabing tayo na!" Natatawang sabi ko habang niyakap rin siya. Wala akong pake kung panaginip lang to, gusto kong sulitin ito habang nandito pa. Pero sigurado akong hindi ito panaginip. Lahat ng ito ay totoo. Alam ko.
"You said it." He laughed. Nahiya ako bigla kaya tinulak ko siya at tumalikod, ngunit bigla niya akong hinila at hinalikan.
"Loki!" Napahawak ako sa pisngi ko na hinalikan niya habang gulat na gulat sa ginawa niya.
"I love you." Sabi niya.
"Oh, thank you." Sabi ko at naglakad na habang akbay niya ako.
"Lorelei Mendez!" Hindi ko na napigilan. Tumakbo ako palayo dahil hindi ko na kinaya ang pagiging malambing ni Loki.
"I love you, Louis Kingsley Mendez!" I shouted while laughing. Lumapit siya sakin at inakbayan ako.
"I love you more." Sabi niya at hinalikan ako sa buhok ko.
"Should we eat first before going home?" Loki asked.
"Yeah, gutom narin ako. Kaso, hindi ko alam kung nasaan tayo? Ay, speaking of! Pano mo nalaman kung nasaan ako?"
"I asked Hershey to track your phone. And he did. I've been waiting there for three hours already."
"3 hours? Sa taas ng puno?"
"Yeah. The wind is nice up there. And I don't mind staying there the whole day. As long as I can protect you from danger." Loki said and pulled me closer to him as we walk.
Loki is so sweet and cheesy. I hate and love it at the same time. I hate it because he makes my heart beat so fast like it's gonna escape my chest but I love it too. I love every detail about Loki. And I hope he does too. No, I know he does too.
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Natuwa ako dun sa nagcomment ng mahaba, kaya nag update ulit ako haha.
xoxo
Published: 2017
Revised: 2021
UHUSHDUA HELP THIS IS SO CRINGEY PERO I THINK U ALL LIKED IT SO NAGRETAIN AKO NG ILANG LINES.