Just so much Drama at once.
They were in the hospital!
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Dean's grip on my hand tightened and my heart started pumping faster. Everyone gave the doctor an uneasy look and waited for him to continue.
"Ellie's lupus unfortunately managed to strike the lungs and it developed a small tumor."
My breath hitched in my throat and everyone in the room gasped. I froze.
No, it can't be true.
I can't have cancer.
"However, we still don't know if it's cancerous or not. If it is not cancerous, hopefully, we will need to do a surgery to get the tumor out and that will be it. However, if it turned out to be cancerous, not only will she undergo surgeries but she will need to take 6 week round of radiation and 3 months of Chemo and as you may know about the chemo, it will result in fatigues, hair loss, nauseousness and sometimes she won't be able to get out of bed and leave to school but the cancer will go. I am sure of that."
"How do you know if it's cancerous or not?" Mom asked with tears swimming in her eyes "We're currently still testing her blood samples and all we can do is wait for them to come out. I will update you once I get the results and hopefully it's good news."
And then he left.
"Oh god" Carrie whispered bringing her hand up to her mouth as she slowly sat down on the couch trying to comprehend the information that was given to her. Mom on the other hand started crying. Hope and her mom just stood there awkwardly with shocked faces and didn't say anything.
Dean was silent.
"You can't tell Jeremy" I yelled at mom "If it's cancerous or not mom, you can't tell him. Do you understand me?!" I yelled even louder, tears streaming down my face "Just don't tell him"
I knew Jeremy had nothing to do with this but I was in too much shock to say anything else, and that was the first thing that came out of my mouth.
I put my head back down on the pillow and cried silently. Dean squeezed my hands every now and then but he was in trance, he wasn't talking to anyone. And all I could do was sit here and pray that whatever that's growing inside of me isn't cancerous.
A few crucial hours passed by as we waited for the results and no one uttered one word. Thankfully, Hope and her annoying mother left a while back and said they'll come and check up on us later, yeah like they actually care about me.
I think Dean was even more affected with this than I was, because he didn't speak a thing to me. I honestly didn't want anyone to talk to me, it was hard for all of us. It brought tears to my eyes to see my family surrounding me, they were all worried about me and I could have never been more thankful to have these amazing people by my side to support me through whatever I go through. I really do love them will all my heart.
"John left to get us food" Carrie said and Mom nodded resting her head against her palms with a heavy sigh. Greg stood behind her, rubbing her back up and down trying to calm her down. Carrie slumped against the other chair and tapped away on her phone.
I coughed suddenly and everyone looked at me concerned when I coughed again but I placed my hand immediately on my mouth and I felt something on my hand right after I let out another strangled cough. Tears blurred my eyes when I noticed more blood covering my hands. I hated it, I really hated being sick.
Dean immediately gave me tissues and I wiped my hands and my mouth when I heard mom start to sob quietly. I placed my head back on the pillow and closed my eyes hoping that this day would end.
My stomach started to feel kind of funny and I opened my eyes and started to reach for the bin. I kept my mouth shut and I gagged when Dean noticed what I was doing and rushed to get me the bin.
He placed it on my legs and held my hair back as I threw up in the bin and again, blood came out with it. Mom stood to her feet now and came towards me, helping Dean. When I was done, I pushed the bucket away and removed the blanket off of me.
"Bathroom" I grumbled and they both grabbed my hands and let me down. I walked slowly to the bathroom, pushing the door open with my shaky hands. I washed my face rinsed my mouth trying to get rid of the foul taste that was in my mouth. When I was done, I opened the door slowly and walked out of the bathroom, however, my head felt a little fuzzy and the next thing I knew I was black.
"Baby wake up"
And my eyes flew open.
I knew where I was. I remember what happened. Dean sounded fine. He was talking to me, he sounded relax which made me even more eager to find out what was he so happy about.
"Ellie, you... you don't have cancer!" Dean smiled brightly at me and I managed to croak a small smile through my sleepy state. He bent down and hugged me kissing my neck lightly "I love you, I love you, I love you..." He kept chanting in my ear quietly and I wrapped my arms around his back breathing in his beautiful scent.
I was fine.
I was going to be fine.
The doctor told us about the surgery to remove the NON cancerous tumor and I was going to do it tomorrow, I wasn't really prepared for a surgery but I just wanted to get that thing out of my body for good. Dean stayed with me the whole day, got me food, chatted with me all day long taking my mind of the surgery tomorrow. Greg visited me and even got me chocolates, man, I was really wrong about this dude. Hope and her mother didn't show up at all and I was happy, I really didn't want to see her.
Around 8 oclock mom barged into my room holding the phone against her cheek with a grin on her face "Jeremy" She mouthed at me and gave me the phone. I smiled and took it from her muttering a small hello.
"Hey baby sister, are you alright?" Jeremy asked with a hint of concern as he spoke. "I'm finee, Jeremy. How are you? I miss you"
"I miss you too, so much. So much has happened with you, first getting shot and now this. Give yourself a break, man" He chuckled at the last part.
"What can I say? Bad luck follows me around" I giggled "When are you coming back?"
He sighed and I instantly knew that it is not very soon.
"I wish I knew, El. I'll tell you as soon as I know so that you'll throw me a surprise party like last time, alright?" He said sarcastically making me burst out laughing "Alright, I love you, Jer. Take care of yourself"
"I should be the one saying that to you, I love you and tell mom I love her and hopefully, I'll see you both soon" Jeremy spoke heavily. I really did miss him but he just had to get away and go for the army. He couldn't have stayed with me. Protected me. Life really sucks.
"I have to go now, Bye El"
"Bye, Jer" I slowly gave the phone to mom gulping. Dean squeezed my hand and looked at me expecting me to cry. I always cry when I hang up from Jeremy. The thought that this might be the last time I hear my brothers voice terrifies me. I hate it so much.
"Okay?" Dean asked and I nodded silently.
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A week has passed and the surgery was done, I was let out of the hospital for bed rest but I couldn't stay in bed the whole day so I decided to go over to Deans house and let me tell you that it was the worst decision I've ever made.
The stitches were still fresh and any horrible move can break them and I'd hate to endure the pain and get stitches again which would suck. So as I was getting out of bed, I felt my whole chest burning up. It hurt but I had to go through with it.
I managed to slip on a sweatshirt but I stayed in my shorts because I couldn't put my pants on just yet. I put on the first pair of flip flops I could find and grabbed my phone then slowly started descending the stairs. No one was home to help me out. Mom was grocery shopping, Greg was at work and Dean was at school. I wanted to surprise him when he got back from school, it was 2:30 already and I was pretty sure if I kept this pace I wouldn't reach his place until sunrise. After 10 minutes of basically crawling down the stairs, I finally got downstairs with a triumphant smile. It took me another 10 minutes of heaving and panting until I reached Deans house. I climbed up the small set of stairs and rang the door bell.
5 seconds later, the door flew open and Hailey stood with a small smile on her face "Ellie!"
When Carrie heard my name, she ran up to the door and looked at me with shock "Ellie! What are you doing out of bed?"
I smiled sheepishly "I came to see Dean"
"You do know Dean's in school honey, right?" Carrie asked opening the door and taking my hand helping me walk inside.
I nodded "I do, I wanted to surprise him"
Carrie shook her head at me with a smile tugging on corner of her lips "You crazy teenagers"
I giggled and walked inside slowly as Carrie and I moved to the living room. She made us some tea and we sat and chatted for a little while. When the door bell rang all of a sudden, Carrie excused herself to go and open the door. I smiled and turned around expecting Dean to come through the living room when I saw a completely different person and my smile faltered slightly.
Hope.
"Hey" She smiled gently at me and I faked a smile back. What was she doing here??
"How are you feeling?" She asked taking a seat in front of me. "I'm good" I simply replied and waited impatiently for the door to ring and for Dean to marsh in with all his glory.
"So what brings you here, Hope?" Carrie asked uncomfortably as she sat next to me. Hope sighed with a soft smile "We didn't get to continue our conversation the last time and I was hoping since Ellie's alright now, we could continue sorting things out between us"
"Hello!" Dean's voice interrupted the silence that was slowly starting to consume us "Mom! I'm going over to Ellies!" I giggled when I heard him throw his back on the floor with a loud thump.
"Come here, I need to talk to you!" Carrie called him to the living room smiling.
"Mom, can't it wait?" Dean appeared inside the living room eating an apple. His eyes scanned the room when they landed on mine and they widened "How'd you get here?"
"I walked" I scratched the back of my head smiling guiltily when he frowned at me "Ellie, this is serious. You shouldn't be risking yourself" He came over and hugged me lightly, kissing my forehead.
"Yes?" He then turned to Hope with a serious look on his face "As you can see my girlfriend is sick and it's not the right time to discuss that matter"
"I'm leaving tomorrow, Dean"
"Well, Adios!"
"Dea-"
"Seriously Hope? My girlfriend is sick. I need to be with her. Respect that" He interuppted her. When Hope suddenly started yelling "WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU? I JUST WANT TO TALK TO YOU DEAN! I'M ONLY ASKING FOR A FEW MINUTES OF YOUR TIME. I DON'T THINK IN THESE FIVE MINUTES SOMETHING WILL HAPPEN TO YOUR DAMSEL IN DISTRESS! SHE'S FINE, DEAN. FOR GODS SAKE YOU WERE NEVER LIKE THIS. You were never so protective, SO CARING TO ME! I BET THE ONLY REASON YOU'RE KEEPING UP THAT 'I CARE ABOUT YOU' FACADE BECAUSE SHE'S SICK. SHE'S A SICK PERSON. AND SICK PEOPLE WILL ALWAYS REMAIN SICK. ARE YOU LOOKING FOR THAT? ARE YOU SERIOUSLY WILLING TO END UP WITH A SICK GIRL WHO YOU HAVE TO DEDICATE ALL OF YOUR LIFE TO PAMPER HER LIKE A BABY? I THOUGHT YOU HATED THESE THINGS. She's sick. And trust me Ellie, he's going to dump you just like your ex boyfriend did to you. He's going to dump you for another girl better than you. HEALTHIER THAN YOU. You just wait and see"
Dean clenched his fists, his face turned red and his nose was flaring like a wild animal ready to attack it's prey. I immediately stood up and came between them two who were shooting daggers at each other.
"At least, I wasn't the one who put him in jail" The words rolled out of my mouth without hesitation. Dean smiled at me and then turned back to her with a glare "She will never be like you, Hope. I swore on my life to never hurt her. I love her even more than I've ever loved you. And I'm so glad you did what you did because if you didn't act so selfish I would have never met my soul mate"
Hope walked towards me with angry tears bubbling in her eyes "I should have listened to my mother and I should have never come here" All of a sudden, she raised her hands and with all her might she pushed me on my chest. I felt like the air has been sucked out of lungs and it all started to burn once my back bumped against Dean's chest and he held me up to stop my fall.
My whole body felt like it was on fire and I suddenly looked at my chest to see blood seeping through my shirt. My breathing got heavier as I watched Dean screaming at Hope who was staring at me with wide eyes.
Carrie was running around and calling someone when I suddenly felt light headed as more blood poured out of me and then I passed out.
I woke up with a sharp pain stabbing my chest. I opened my eyes and looked down to find my body wrapped fully with a white cloth and I was in my own bed. Hallelujah.
"Mom!" I called out and sat up slowly trying to avoid the pain. Plenty of footsteps padded the stairs and I knew mom was not the only one who was coming. The door flew open and Dean stood near the door with mom and Carrie behind him.
"Are you okay?" Dean asked and I nodded "I'm fine, what happened? Why am I not in the hospital?"
"You were, we stitched you up again and brought you back home. You are a heavy sleeper" Dean pointed out and sat down, dipping the bed a little.
"Hungry?" Mom asked and I shook my head "Nope. Where's Hope?"
A very uncomfortable silence followed my question and I cocked an eyebrow. Carrie cleared her throat and wrapped her arms around herself "She went back home"
I nodded and laid my head against the pillow as I started remembering Hopes words. Dean did deserve someone much better than me. I was sick. Weak. And I hated myself for that. But it's not like I could have done anything about it.
"Ellie?" Dean said breaking me out of my trance "Everything alright?" He asked climbing into my bed and lying next to me. I realized that mom and Carrie left the room and that was why Dean was getting so comfortable. He wrapped his arms around my shoulders and I placed my head on his chest with a sigh "Yeah. I love you"
"I love you too, Ellie. Forever"
"And always, Dean"
And always. sigh.