March 8th 1939
Dear journal,
Papa told me to be careful around Franz, not to tell him anything. He knows that his papa is a favoured nazi of the fuhrer. If he found out that his son was friends with a jew something very bad would happen. But Papa still won't tell me what would happen I've asked him a number of 15 times and still, nothing. He won't talk about mama and Oma. I understand the latter but why won't he just tell me what would happen, I'm 14 I can handle the goddamn truth. But only if he says it or hell write it down, I can read.
I want to tell Franz everything, about mama and oma, that im jewish, that papas keeping secrets from me and treating me like I'm still a little child. I know I have to be careful but I dont want to be hiding things, if anything that will just raise more suspicion.
Papa said to only use his last name 'Deutscher' instead of mamas name 'Engle' and if somebody ever asks where mama is I'm supposed to say she died I dont understnad all of this theres just too many lies I have to tell, too many secrets I'm forced to keep.
~Lucy E Deutscher