|Skyscrapers|
The mass of Borrowed gather eagerly outside near the gate, watching two buses enter the facility parking lot, stopping with a loud screech from the breaks. Beyond the gate, desert stretches for miles, cities and towns nowhere in sight. I stand off to the side, secluding myself from the elated girls.
"Excited?"
I turn around and find myself staring up at Kyler. "Wish we had more time." My eyes flicker to one of the buses. "Will you be riding with me?"
He nods, partially closing his eyes against the bright sun. "I will be with you the entire time."
"Oh..." I say, my face clearly exuding disappointment as Kyler clears his throat loudly.
"Don't sound too excited." He laughs, brushing his fingers through his cropped hair.
His tanned skin has been kissed by the sun, both his cheekbones rosy from a sunburn. I take note of his eyes, how they're a softer brown today. He catches me staring and smiles. I turn away from him, pinching my arm inconspicuously for being caught.
"They're getting on the buses," I say, hoping to alleviate the awkward moment.
"May I?" he says, holding out his arm.
I shake my head. "This isn't a date, Kyler."
"Who said it was? Apparently you're thinking too far into this, Iris," he teases, giving me a poke in the arm. Rubbing the spot he just touched, I shove him away and walk toward the bus.
"I don't handle rejection well," says Kyler, settling next to me at the back of the bus. He shifts his body to face me, leaning his back against the window. I thought sitting by the isle way would be a nice escape route.
"We can't be friends," I say point blank, staring straight ahead.
"Why?" He grabs my hand. I try to pull away, but fail.
"You know why, stop being this way," I answer, looking around, hoping no one is watching.
I scan the bus, seeing the rest of the Borrowed sitting next to their assigned escort. Some girls stare out the window, too shy to speak, and others chatter, flirting willingly. Maybe the flirtatious girls do this for a reason, one in which I will never understand.
"I'm sorry about your friend," says Kyler, pulling me from my trance. "I tried to get her released today, but if I had tried any further, they would become suspicious of my actions. So, I'm really –"
"I heard you the first time," I butt in, wishing that I had chosen the window seat to get lost in the desert landscape. Kyler looks out the window than back at me.
"Do you want to sit here?"
"I just want..." I stop, contemplating what to say next. "Can we just sit in silence for a while?"
Something in the way he's looking at me changes, like a switch on a lamp – light to no light. Before, he was kind and worried, but now, his eyes have darkened. I examine the way his mouth no longer holds a slight turn upward at the corners. Lips pressed in a tight line, he turns his whole body away from me and stares out the window.
The left side of the bus stirs with Borrowed and Borrowers pressing their faces and hands against the windows, gaping with awe at something on the other side. My curiosity pulls me up, leaning over a short, stout girl's shoulder. She looks up at me in annoyance, rolling her beady eyes.
"Sorry," I mumble, craning my neck to see what's out there.
There are ten black vehicles in a hurry, ranging from cars, to SUV's, and trucks driving in a cluster. The bus swings to the right, breaking. I start to fall forward when a hand latches onto my elbow, pulling me into their chest.
"Careful, curiosity killed the cat," says Kyler with his usual smirk. I can feel his rapid heartbeat against my body as I press firmly to him.
"I hate cats," I grumble, moving away from him to sit back down.
He settles next to me. "Hate is a strong word, Iris."
"Get used to it," I say with a newfound pride. Glancing over at him, I notice his jaw tighten; he's trying to not say something when he clearly wants to. Instead, I ask, "Where were those black vehicles headed?"
Without looking at me, he says, "It's our Presider."
A lump forms in my throat. I try to clear it, but it won't go away. "He is headed to PURE?"
Kyler nods. "Of course, why wouldn't he? It's his dynasty, after all."
We didn't share words after that until the city came into view. Tall skyscrapers burst high into the hazy sky. It's a hot day, a good day to stay indoors. Life has come back to existence as people, like small ants, scrambled to their workstations for the day.
"Where would you like to go?" asks Kyler. He touches my arm to pull me from my daydream as I imagine myself back home where everything wasn't right, but at least comfortable.
"The espresso shop," I say with flatness. The city has me hypnotized.
Kyler laughs a little. "It's 90 degrees out and you want a coffee?"
I glare at him. "Yes, I'd like a coffee."
He gets the point as I snarl at him, raising his hands in front of him to surrender to me. It's my turn to laugh a little inside. I look away, letting my hair fall over my face in hopes he can't see the amusement pulling at my lips.
"As you wish, princess," he says with a sigh.
I punch his arm, making him yelp. Surrounding eyes blink at us, gawking. Tucking a strand of hair behind my ear, I sit up straight, place my hands in my lap and stare forward, trying my best to ignore the attention I've created. With one last glance from my peripheral view, I see Kyler mumbling to himself, rubbing his arm.
I smile with satisfaction. I will get my way.
Everyone scrambles from the bus, going their separate ways. Kyler stands next to me, scuffing his military boots against the sidewalk. He whistles his own tune, waiting for me to make my next move. So I do, walking away from him in a hurry.
"What the heck!" he says. "You can't just walk off like that." His long strides catch up to me fast.
I smirk, looking straight ahead toward my destination. "Today is my day, Kyler Hart! Stay on your toes." Laughing, I start to jog. Tiny pricks of pain shoot up from my ankle, hardly enough to stop me from moving.
"At least let me give you a lift," he gasps next to me, patting his right shoulder to indicate a piggy-back ride. I roll my eyes.
"Chivalry is dead!" I push ahead, allowing the hot breeze whip against my face.
The sun bursts with energy, beating down on my pale skin. It feels good to make contact, again. Even my skin is welcoming the rays, as the heat ignites goose bumps to pop up all over the surface of my exposed arms.
I'm not sure how long we've ran when I finally see the espresso shop where I met Finn for the second time. I stop and stare. The sidewalk seems bare now. Everyone has gone into their designated areas for the day, and won't be seen until their time expires and are allowed home.
Kyler's loud stomps stop next to me. He bends forward, resting his hands on the top of his thighs. Beads of sweat trickle down the sides of his temples, dropping to the ground near his boots. I reach up to wipe away my own, but find none.
"Did you even break a sweat?" he pants, licking his dry lips. "I didn't realize you were so athletic, Iris." His smile returns. He reaches over, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear. "Why does my pulse race every time I'm around you?" he says, his cheeks flush.
Why doesn't mine?
"Just a silly crush, Kyler Hart," I say, trying to lighten the tension. I turn to walk away, and before taking another step, I look over my shoulder at him. "Can you stay at a distance? I'd like some privacy."
He sighs. "Sure, whatever you want, Iris." I turn and walk forward, hearing him mumble from behind, "I'll always be at a distance."
He's right. He will be at a distance for now, and I'm not sure for how long. I can't commit to his feelings because I'm not even sure I can reciprocate them. I'm not use to having a guy take interest in me the way Kyler has. His persistency is pulling me back to a moment two years ago now, but before, I ignored that it could have really meant something.
It was a sweet gesture, rather cliché actually, the boy picking up the girls scattered books on the stairwell. However, recalling that day, I now understand. It was the way his hand brushed against mine when I frantically gathered my belongings. The way his eyes seemed warm and gentle, causing me to look away in panic. Most of all, I remember the way his caring voice dared to break through my impenetrable wall.
That's the past, before I turned seventeen, and before I became a Borrowed.
Before he became a Borrower...
I push back these thoughts, making my way into the espresso shop. The same electronic doorbell buzzes in my ear, and the same boy at the counter waves to me. This time, I wave back. Looking around, I notice there is no one here. I'm disappointed not to find Finn sitting at one of the tables, smiling, chatting, and being pleasant even when things are terribly wrong.
Making my way to the counter, I clear my throat and say, "Excuse me."
The boy looks up from the computer. "Hello, can I get you something?"
"Actually, I think we might know the same person," I say. "His name is Finn."
He grins. "Yeah, Finn is a good friend of mine!"
I smile back. "Have you seen him today?" Maybe I will find him, after all.
"You just missed him, I'm sorry," he says, his smile fading. "I can still get you something to drink, though?"
"Um, no thank you. I'm kind of short on time..."
I don't want to tell him I'm a Borrowed and that my pass will expire in a few hours. For now, I want to seem like everyone else, pretend I'm heading to some job, trying to earn a living and stay alive when all else seems pointless.
Glancing out the window, I watch Kyler carefully. He's sitting at a bench, scraping at the wood with his fingernail. He looks sad and alone. I guess I know the feeling. Suddenly, something inside my chest swells with the want to see my home, to slip away for a few hours alone.
I would be in so much trouble, though.
"Everything okay?" the boy asks. "Is that guy bothering you out there?"
I turn to him. "Actually, I need your help."
He perks up, puffing his chest out. "Sure, anything for a friend of a friend."
"Where is the emergency exit?"
His chest deflates as he realizes he won't be confronting Kyler. "That way," he says, pointing toward a hallway at the back of the store.
"Thank you so much." I move away from the counter and walk toward the emergency exit door, stopping before I push it open. "An alarm won't go off?"
"You're good to go!" he says from the front. "Nice meeting you friend of Finn's!"
Smiling, I push open the door and step out onto an alley way. Kyler isn't going to be happy with me. Hopefully he will search for me without contacting PURE. I'm just worried that the employee could be thrown into the Draft for aiding a Borrowed. I guess everything now is based on chance.
Chance is a gamble that seems to be in my favor.
I keep walking for a while, glancing over my shoulder from time to time, hoping to not find Kyler stomping toward me with fire and steam coming from his ears and nostrils. He must be furious at me right now. I don't blame him. I've destroyed what little trust might have been between the two of us.
It must be lunch for the workers in the city. The streets and sidewalks begin to fill with people. Their heads hung low, no attempt at making conversation with the person next to them. It's all business.
I move against the human traffic in hopes to blend in with the rest. The loft I had called home comes into view. My pulse quickens as I reach the lower step leading up to the main door.
Shoot, no key...
"Irissa, is that you?"
I turn toward the woman's voice. It's Mrs. Bell, the widowed woman who lives on the first floor. She touches my shoulder, smiling. I try and smile back, but my attention is constantly drawn behind her, searching for Kyler or any of the Borrowers looking for me.
I look back to her. "Mrs. Bell, how are you?"
She shrugs. "Still a widower..."
I swallow, trying to wet my dry throat. This is awkward. "And your health, how is it?"
"Sadly, not good," she answers, her face appearing a bit pallid than its usual olive tone.
"Oh...um..." I struggle for words.
"Not to be worried," she says. "If it's my time to go, then I will meet my loving husband on the other side."
"Your kids...are they..." Again, I can't find the right words.
"Drafted," she says, her shoulders sag. Soon after, she perks back up when realizing the dark tone our conversation has taken. "Are you locked out?"
I nod. "I forgot my key, again."
A kind smile appears on Mrs. Bell's face. "That is why your mother had left me with a spare these last few years. Come on, I will let you in."
"Sorry for the trouble," I say, following her up the stairs and into the building.
Mrs. Bell sighs. "You are never trouble, such a quiet girl who has always kept to herself. No trouble at all." She unlocks the door to my loft and turns to me. "I hope to see you again soon." There is finality in her tone as if this will be our last time ever laying eyes on one another before she meets the afterlife. I don't know how to react, but robotically move forward and hug her gently. She pulls away first.
"Such a sweet and a quiet girl..." She smiles and walks back toward the staircase, disappearing to the level below.
The inside of the loft releases a chill through the air at the doorway. Hugging myself, I take a step inside, almost afraid to experience this nostalgic feeling. I can almost hear voices of the past, ghosts moving around from room to room. First, I walk through the living room where Chase and I would fight over the sofa chair. I can hear his voice now, teasing me until I cried for our mom. Looking toward the kitchen, I imagine her standing behind the counter, yelling at the two of us to play nice. But we couldn't, we were siblings.
But he isn't my real sibling, and she isn't my real mom.
Lies...
All lies...
I shake away the thoughts that keep plaguing my mind and continue to walk down the hallway toward my room. The door is shut, closed off from the rest of the loft. Maybe Evelyn did that to try and forget I existed. Maybe she is pretending to care about me now at PURE.
I need answers. Did my parents die because of the Swarm? Was it their genetics that went wrong? Will I be next?
Something wraps around my lower leg. "What do you want, Boots?" I try and nudge away the mangy looking cat. "I swear Chase picked you up in an alley way." The cat stares up at me with its yellow eyes and licks its lips.
Okay, so I don't hate cats...
"Hungry, I take it?" I ask the unresponsive animal.
I look at my door and decide I won't relive painful memories, but instead keep it shut. Keep myself shut from the past.
Boots purrs loudly from the kitchen, meowing and rubbing his body against every piece of furniture in the loft. I grab him some cat food and disperse it into his dish, petting the top of his back. He dips low to the floor.
"Now you're happy," I say with a crooked smile.
Yawning, I stretch my hands over my head. A nap seems ideal, so I walk to the couch, falling backward onto the soft cushions. The ceiling fan was left on, spinning in circles up above. I watch the blades spin and spin until my eyelids grow heavy. Three knocks startle me into an upright position.
"What the heck," I gasp while my heartbeat thumps rapidly in my chest.
Three more knocks, this time they're pounding.
The Borrowers are here...
"This was short lived," I say, walking toward the door, I place my hand on the handle.
"Irissa, its Mrs. Bell, again," says the voice on the other side.
I swing the door open, surprised. "Oh..."
"I have a friend here of yours," she says, smiling and completely clueless he's here to collect me.
Kyler has his arm around Mrs. Bell's shoulders. "Thanks for your help, ma'am."
She looks up at him and winks. "It was my pleasure. You two catch up now." Kyler drops his arm, allowing her to walk back to the staircase. He looks at me, his smile disappearing.
"What the hell is wrong with you?" He bursts through me, entering without my permission.
I slam the door, turning to face him. "Come on in and make yourself comfortable!"
Laughing in disbelief, he shakes his head. "So I'm the bad guy?"
"Yes...no! Ugh, why can't I just have some time alone?" I storm past him.
He grabs my arm before I can get too far. "Whoa...whoa...hang on one second." I swing around, nearly falling into him. He holds me at arm's length. "You're insufferable."
"Does that mean I can stay here a bit longer?"
"It means that you aren't going to give me a choice. Knowing how you are by now..."
"That's right." I smirk and take a step back, but Kyler's hands tighten around my arms, holding me in place.
I challenge him, trying to pull free, instead he inches closer. His breath is warm on my face, his dark brown eyes staring into mine. I can't move away, so I move closer to him without reason. I'm not thinking straight. The way he smells like peppermint from a piece of candy is tantalizing my senses. His lips crush into mine, forceful at first, now gentle, more inviting. Kyler pulls back first, his pupils dilated.
"That won't ever happen again," I say, breaking from his touch.
"Is that why I pulled away first and you didn't?"
Why didn't I pull away first? Did I actually enjoy the kiss?
"Your grip was so tight, I had no choice!" I say.
Kyler throws his hands in the air. "You're being serious? You could have bit my lip or stepped on my toe!"
My face is burning hot with fury. "You're a masochist!"
He drags his hands across his face, then up through his hair to grip the short strands. "Can we please stop yelling?"
I take a deep breath. "Yes. Fine...whatever!"
We both stand in silence for a moment, his kiss still lingering on my lips. I wipe my hand across my mouth and stomp toward the couch, falling backward onto it. Kyler looks over at me, his face no longer strewn with anger.
"I hate arguing with you, Iris," he says softly.
"Then don't," I mumble, crossing my arm over my eyes to shut out the sunlight seeping through the blinds. "Let's stop talking altogether, okay?"
"Fine," he says, stomping off into another room like a child scorn.
I need to get away. Maybe I should runaway and leave all of this behind...
"Just maybe," I whisper, blinking open my eyes, deciding on my next move.