● above is a photo of Sophia (left) and Addie (right) dancing and laughing on the shore ●
THE NEXT MORNING, Addison knocked on my door with donuts for me and Cooper. Cooper crashed on the couch when I left to get dinner for us both, but when I came back he was sound asleep. Sydney laid at the base of the couch by his bare feet, perked her head up when I walked in.
He slept so softly. His chest gently rose up and down as he dreamed, his breath blowing softly through the crease between his lips. I turned my back to him as I ate at my kitchen counter, wrapping his food in tin foil then placing it in the fridge. Maybe he'd want it for lunch while on the road the next day.
I tiptoed through the living room once I heard the knock and received the text from Addison she was at the door. Cooper had laid down and got comfy, spooning one of my throw pillows under his arm. His hand hung off the side of the couch and Sydney gently sniffed his fingers. He looked so cute and so peaceful. The night before, while I laid among my white sheets, I came to the conclusion that I did like Cooper.
I really liked him.
I liked his glowing smile he would flash at every chance he'd get. I liked his hair, how fluffy and sophisticatedly messy it was. I liked his laugh, he'd crack himself up at his own jokes, add on to Addison's. He would lift his feet up if he was sitting down as he cackled, slap someone on the arm or clap his hands. He was so contagious, you felt what he was feeling. If he was smiling, I felt as bright as the sun. If he was being goofy, I couldn't hold back my giggles. I had a crush, yes. And I never thought a guy like Cooper, a nice and funny and amazing guy, would light a spark in my chest. But he did.
My parents never would have thought either. When I came home from parties on Friday nights, I would bring the guy who wore baggy jeans and a t shirt with a douche remark written in big letters across the chest. He would carry a pack of smokes in his back pocket and a condom in his wallet at all times. His face was never shaved, never kept clean. His handshake was weak when shaking my father's.
There was nothing wrong with the boys I kissed for those few years. They just didn't know what they were doing with themselves or where there were going. None of us do. And to my parents, that marked a red flag.
Cooper probably didn't know where he was going or what he was doing, but he knew who he was. I lacked that in myself, I hoped to find it in him.
I opened the door to see Addison's light blond hair up in a bun, eyelashes coated in mascara and light pink gloss across her smile. "Good morning," she chimed, stepping past me and setting down the bag of the sugary breakfast pastries on the counter. She looked to Cooper, who hadn't fidgeted from his slumber. Then she peered over to me, slowly unraveling the bag and sliding out a rainbow sprinkled donut, my favorite. I thanked her as I grabbed a napkin and placed the treat on top after taking a nibble.
"I started my cycle today," she softly stated as she glided her own donut out, a strawberry filled one. For a moment, I was puzzled as to why Addison decided to share this information with me, but then I remembered what she told me at the mall the other day. I widened my eyes and nodded, giving a sigh of relief. She smiled gently in response, taking a bite. "Thank goodness, right?"
I affirmed her. "Oh, Sophie," she whispered, shaking her head and looking out my window right above where Cooper laid. "I was so scared."
I reached over to offer a comforting rub to her shoulder. "I really have to be more careful," she continued. I could read the dread that rested on her face and also the relief on the relaxed parts of her. "I have to stop sleeping around, at least a little bit," she munched again, "I need to find another way to feel better about myself." I raised my eyebrow and whispered, "What do you mean?"
She sighed, taking a rather large bite of jelly filled goodness into her mouth. "You might think this is crazy, everyone does. But I am not a fan of myself."
I definitely thought that was crazy. Addison was one of the most beautiful humans I had ever encountered, much like her brother was. She had the curves every man would kill to run his hands upon, her smile took your breath away, she looked stunning in anything she dressed herself in, especially in the sand-colored sun dress she wore that morning, and her jokes were laugh-until-you-cry worthy.
I was a huge fan of Addison, she brought someone crazy and fun inside of me that I never knew was there. Back in Broken Hill, I was silent and only laughed at what other people were saying, not making other people laugh at what I was saying. It was such a good feeling to make others happy, I never would have guessed that seeing the smiles would fill me up.
But Addison showed me how amazing it was to be a good person. I was very grateful she was a part of my life, and hearing that she didn't like herself broke my heart.
"I've never looked in the mirror and really loved what I see," she explained. "So I find satisfaction in myself by having others tell me I'm beautiful, rather than me. I know it's not healthy. It worked for awhile though. But this experience taught me that I need to take care of me and not have to rely on someone else making me feel better. It's dangerous to not trust yourself."
I understood how it felt to be uncertain with your gut feeling. That was all I felt back home, the want to sprint full speed to what I wanted but the so-called responsibility of pleasing everyone around me pulled back. I think my family not encouraging me to fulfill my desires in life played a huge role in me not encouraging myself to do the same. Standing in that living room with Addison and Cooper dozing on my sofa, I was different. I shoved everything that was in my drawers into a suitcase and jumped in my Jeep and decided to do something for myself for once.
And I think I was at my happiest.
I half-frowned toward my friend, pulling her in for a small side hug. "If it makes you feel any better, I think your drop dead gorgeous. And if you need any help, I'll be here for you." Addison smiled at me, squeezing me back. We heard Sydney'c collar jingle softly and looked to see a very sleepy Cooper rubbing his eyes awake. "Good morning," we simultaneously sang together, making him jump up in surprise.
Addison and I giggled and continued to eat our donuts. "Addison was a doll and brought us breakfast before we leave, so wake up," I gladly declared, noticing how extra curly his hair was after he woke up. Cooper toothed a smile, making my heat melt at how obviously and adorably tired he was, "Why, Addison you're such an angel. Thank you."
We all munched on our sugary breakfast and Cooper and I discussed our plan for the day: we'd get ready, drive for about an hour then stop for lunch, then drive the next two hours to Ellis Beach, where my sister and the love of her life will be eloped. I was nervous and uncertain, but knowing Cooper was going to be by my side the whole day calmed down my racing pulse. According to Cooper, he had gotten no texts from Noah over the night and Addie says that he is truly upset about Cooper venturing out with me. Even if my crush was going to be with me for a whole day, the guilt of causing his best friend to be mad at him for it make me even more unsteady.
After a few minutes of chatting, I went into my room to change into my pink dress that Addison had picked out for me at the mall. I had forgotten how nice I thought I looked in it, it complimented my waist and showed off my newly tanned shoulders. It was a shame Cooper wouldn't be able to see me in it. I put my hair up into a messy, low off to the side bun with a white flower clip on top. I applied mascara to my lashes, brushed on some light blush onto my cheeks and lipgloss to my lips. Slipping on my nude heels, I stepped in front of the mirror. And I looked damn good.
While I was in my bedroom, Addison helped Cooper get all spiffed up in the living room and the bathroom. He dressed in light blue slacks with a tan belt around his waist line and a white button down tucked in. Addison had taken some gel and scrunched Cooper's curls to tame them a little bit and also helped him put on his dress shoes, being careful not to crinkle his button down. He looked damn good too.
Addison cooed when I walked in and hyped me up a little bit, making me laugh. Cooper then turned around to face me, his eyes a few inches above my head. "I always know you do, but I bet you look even more beautiful than usual," he commented.
I blushed violently and grabbed my keys from the counter, preparing myself for the day ahead.
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AUTHOR'S NOTE
I AM SO SORRY FOR THIS SUPER LATE UPDATE!!!! school got the best of me last week, leaving me with no room to make sure this chapter was perfect on time. finals are next week and I'm barely cramming this one in, I hope you can forgive me. to make up for it, I updated not only chapter nine but chapter ten as well! theres also an "aesthetics" chapter in the beginning now to visually represent the characters. my best friend madison made them for me, her link is down below, and she did such a good job. please check her out!!
remember to comment and vote! i'll talk to you next week!!
-nicole robinson :)