Content Warning: this chapter deals with the theme of abortion.
I've flown overseas often whether it's to follow my dad on his business trips or to go holidaying with my mum. Everytime I've flown, there was always this feeling of nervous excitement but today it wasn't quite there.
Instead I felt like a hollow shell replaying the memory of dinner just barely over a week ago.
"Is this your new boyfriend honey?" Mum asked, sincere happiness in her eyes. Happiness that would fade away into confusion, horror and more fear.
Prison. Is this what it would feel like? The two guards I met before were with us, but we were surrounded in a thick crowd of guards, eight male guards and two female guards. The two female ones walked very close to me. All of their attires were casual, very touristy. Philip looked like he was engaged in a conversation with the blonde guard.
Looking at the throng of guards, I felt like I'd seen some of their faces before. Like the messy brunette haired guard beside me, with a perfect smile and toned arms, I was sure I saw in the beach, always an umbrella or two away.
Perhaps it was normal for the prince, to have guards around him, most he never interacted with. A circle, hovering, pretending they didn't know him.
"Somewhat," Philip answered for me, sparing me an uncomfortable answer as he passed my mother the mashed potatoes she ran out to buy at the word guest. "Your daughter and I are starting a family."
I turned to glance at him, trying to see what had shifted in the afternoon to now, why the sentence felt foreign but enough for me to understand the essence of it, a polite, very political way of saying your daughter is pregnant and we were going to get married.
I wanted to inject, say something but I promised Philip I would let him control it, just like how his family was going to control the rest of my life.
My bags were light, only essentials and a few things I couldn't live without. I'd get to visit my family a few times a year, come back to Australia if they didn't want to move to Greece, but otherwise pack enough things I couldn't live without, the rest would be provided for me there, especially clothes.
Philip reassured me there was nothing wrong with what I were, it just wasn't what a future royal would wear. I was clad in my best outfit, because the minute we reached Greece, we would be surrounded by paparazzi. They wouldn't think too much of me at the start, but when the news ultimately broke, it would be a matter of time before they realise that I wasn't a female guard.
For now, Philip wasn't going to acknowledge my existence.
I felt lonely. I ran a hand through my jet black hair wondering why Philip wouldn't look at me, or hold me or talk to me.
"Starting a family?" My dad repeated Philips words with enough confusion and alarm. I don't miss the way his eyes darted to my finger, expecting a large rock.
Maybe that would have been easier. Philip's smile was polite, not really sincere, "Yes, we didn't plan it to be so soon for either of us, but things happened unexpectedly and we decided to handle the situation with honour. We will be wed, in my home, Greece."
I knew this, but the words, when said to my parents felt like a burden, a heavy weight.
"You're pregnant?" Was what my mum said, food forgotten on her plate.
My dad stood up, looking angry. "No, you are not going to marry my daughter, not until we know you."
Philip smiled, "I'm sorry but there is a lot to do. My mother is expecting a call soon, and I cannot leave the queen waiting." He turned to me touching my tensed up shoulders gently, nothing but gentleness in his eyes. "I'll be quick, your daughter is pregnant and to avoid a royal scandal, we are going to get married, you're daughter will be a princess of Greece and soon - to - be - queen of my country. It is a big honour for your daughter and unfortunately, due to our..." he hesitated, "circumstances, we can't go through the formalities but I assure you she will have everything she could ever want for."
He bowed, "I am truly sorry, but I have to leave. I will drop by to check in on all of you. Your daughter and I leave to Greece in five days."
Then he left.
Leaving me to deal with the burnt of it all. "You're pregnant?" My mum said.
"What is he talking about?" My dad roared.
"How did this happen?" My mum asked the mash potatoes.
"You are not leaving, that man is an imposter."
I shook my head, looking at my plate of uneaten food. "Pete, our daughter is pregnant."
"Yes Lizzie and she's going to marry some fake baboon."
"He doesn't sound fake," my mother said shocked, "and wouldn't that be good for her, married to a prince, her future will be secure."
"He's an imposter Lizzie, he's trying to con us. Next thing you know, he'll ask us for all our money-"
"I'm going to be sick," I told them, my parents who were hardly interested in me, just roaring at each other whilst I ran into the toilet, sobbing as whatever I ate came out.
I sat in business class on a plane, I wasn't going to lie, I was disappointed there wasn't a private jet. I wanted a private jet, because then I could talk to Philip. But I sat with the brunette guard with perfect teeth. She smiled at me, and turned to look outside her window.
I closed my eyes trying to erase the past five days. From my father who even though mum showed him a picture of Philip from the news, refused to believe I'd slept with a prince and tried convincing the two of us he was a con-artist.
My mum, who was more supportive helping me pack and crying every few minutes. She didn't quite know what to make of this. It felt like fiction. A story book where the prince left his seed his Cinderella before kidnapping her to his kingdom.
Because I wasn't allowed to die, there was no way I could die.
I saw the guards outside my window, I knew they were watching me since the day they learnt I was pregnant with Philips son.
I didn't want to know what they would do if I refused to cooperate, if I tried to abort the baby inside me myself. I didn't know.
But when I turned to look at Philip sitting across the isle from me, a glass of whiskey in his hand, sunglasses covering blue eyes I knew. I realised there were a lot of worse positions to be in. A lot of more painful fiancees.
Philip and I had chemistry.
Maybe I could learn to love the prince across me. Maybe I could be happy, even if a kid happened a little earlier than expected.