(Heya guys, y'all can probably tell what this chapter is about. Which pill do you choose?)
(Warning: don't try this at home guys)
🙇🏽♀️ Natasha 🙇🏽♀️
I got home that night, finding a letter from my landlord. I'd missed payment seven times, and he'd had enough of my bullshit.
Although it was a tiny thing, it was like an earthquake. The last thing I had, and I was being evicted in ten days. I couldn't do this anymore.
It hurt to wake up every day. I had no purpose to anything. I sat down, grabbed a piece of paper and wrote my letter, it wasn't to anyone specifically, but at least then I'd said my goodbye. I switched the tv on and watched my favourite film once more. I grabbed the phone and ordered a takeaway, scraping the money from around my apartment and enjoyed my last meal.
I took a deep breath and went into the bathroom, stripping off my clothes, grabbing a pot of aspirin and sat in the bath. I ran the water; it was warm against my skin. I washed myself, my eyes lingering on the razor blade on the side. The water had started to overfill and flow onto the floor.
I picked up the razor and treated it like a pen. I drew along my wrists until the water was red. The pain stung, but it didn't compare to what I'd faced.
I'd been pimped out by my father.
I'd be used by him to get information.
I was sold by him.
Zion abused me.
And Jay.
Well Jay was the one who I hurt. I hurt Jay. I wasn't worth his pain. I couldn't live with the fact that I hurt him.
I emptied the pills into my palm and took a deep breath, before closing my eyes. I took the pills in my mouth and swallowed them down. Pouring more and more into my hand before taking them all.
I shook, fading slowly into the darkness.