3
To lapse morally; To drop to a lower level, as in one's morals or standards; To revert to a worse condition.
Translation:
Backslide
She woke up before dawn, quickly got dressed and took off from Justin’s apartment across her own. Then, she washed her face and soaked in a hot bath to clear her head.
She stared at her own body. Almost every inch of it, had been touched by the city’s most wanted bachelor—Justin Adams. She couldn’t believe that she went overboard last night. She looked for fun. For oblivion. Losing her virginity on a one night stand with a hotshot playboy is way over what she had in mind when she started out last night.
He was sound asleep when she left him this morning. She woke up and she was locked in his embrace. She moved inch by inch so she wouldn’t wake him up. He moved a bit when she was out of his arms. And then she quickly dressed up, took her sandals and marched barefooted across the hall.
She still felt a bit sore. But she didn’t feel guilty at all. She didn’t feel like she didn’t have any values. She didn’t even feel that she cheated on Troy. She felt that none of the emotions and thrills that she felt with Justin last night, she felt with Troy.
It was the first time in her life that she felt alive. That she felt appreciated and adored. And when she felt the pain of the impact of their lovemaking, she felt his concern. It felt genuine. She felt cared for. She felt that she mattered.
She remembered when pain was visible on her face, concern and guilt were in his eyes as he wiped away her tears and kissed her. Now, she realized what he did. He took off the condom when he realized she was a virgin. Probably he thought, it will hurt her more. Her body is not yet accustomed to sex. He thought it will be gentler if he didn’t wear condom. Probably, he also thought she was safe. He need not wear protection. And when he entered her again, he was so much gentler, until it didn’t hurt at all anymore.
A thought crossed her mind. She was a virgin. He was a rakehell! She was safe. But is he? Adrienne shrugged the thought off her mind. Justin Adams is most probably too smart and too egotistical to catch something. He must be using protection all the time, not just to be safe, but to make sure that no woman can blackmail him into marriage.
She felt fine when she went to bed after the bath. And this caused her to worry. She spent the night in sin, but all that’s left were memories that she knew she would not mind dwelling on for some time in the future.
She was awakened by the ring of her phone. “Hello.” She said sleepily.
“Wake up!” It was Jill.
“It’s too early!” She told her grumpily.
“What time did you sleep last night?” Jill asked.
“Why?”
“Because you’re still sleeping and it’s past twelve. You never sleep past twelve noon.”
“Well, I decided to break the habit.” She said.
“You slept late last night, that’s what it is.” Jill said, her tone was accusing.
“I don’t know what time I slept.” Adrienne said She stood up to go to her bathroom. “Hold on. I’m just going to splash some water on my face to wake myself up.”
Jill waited for five minutes while Adrienne washed her face and brushed her teeth.
“Alright. What’s up?” Adrienne asked when she finished.
“How was Gypsys?”
That was enough to wake her up. “Ah… great. Nothing different. The same as the others.”
Shit! I’m lying!
“Did you leave early? Tell me you didn’t leave early!”
“Why?” She asked.
“Well… one of the girls I know from my neighborhood said that Justin Adams was there. And he was with some redhead. They didn’t arrive together. He approached her and then they were dancing, then they were kissing and then they left together.”
Now, her heart was pounding. Damn! How popular can Justin Adams be? She must remember not to go to Jill’s apartment for two months for the risk of being recognized.
“So what?”
“Well, Justin isn’t known for picking up girls at bars. He does have a reputation of a playboy, but you will never see him holding hands with a girl in public, least of all kissing.”
“And the point is?”
“Well… she could be special. Justin likes to keep his reputation of being single. He doesn’t go steady with any girl. He doesn’t go to public with a girl alone. And that’s what makes him more attractive! Like he is ice king or something. He doesn’t pursue and he walks away easily.”
“Wow! How can an ice king be a playboy? I thought playboys are supposed to be hot!”
“Yeah, and that’s what makes him different! That’s what makes him a god! He is never known for pickup lines! But beautiful girls, worthy enough to be models, would just fall on his feet. And last night, it seemed he broke his rules. He picked someone up!”
“Jillian, why are we talking about Justin Adams? You called me to talk about him? Why is everybody obsessed with his lovelife?”
“He doesn’t have one.” Jill reminded her.
“Alright. Why is everybody obsessed about his sex life?” She corrected herself. “So what? He sees a girl. He could have known her from the past or something. Could be an old girlfriend.” She surprised herself there. She didn’t know she could lie with so much conviction.
“Nope. He never had a girlfriend! That’s the point.”
She heard her doorbell ring. She was happy with a little distraction. She lost count of how many lies she just told her best friend in a space of two minutes. She opened the door.
Surprise of all surprises. The man of the hour himself is at her doorstep.
What does he want now?!
He was about to open his mouth to say something but she cut him off.
“Shut up!” She told him, and his eyebrows shot up behind his sports sunglasses.
“What?” Jill asked.
“I mean… let’s not talk about him. I’ll go take a shower and I’ll call you back later.” She hung up without waiting for Jill’s answer.
She faced Justin, who looked amused. He held out a cup of Starbucks coffee in his hand.
“For the hangover? That’s assuming I can speak now.” He said, smiling.
She opened the door wider without saying a word and turned her back on him. He followed her inside and closed the door behind him.
He placed the coffee on her table and pushed his shades up on his head, revealing his beautiful blue eyes.
”Thanks.” She said.
“No sweat.” He said. “You didn’t give me a chance to make you one this morning.”
She turned red. She was now very sober and was reminded of everything that happened between them last night.
“Yeah… last night… It was… it never should have happened.” She stammered.
He didn’t say anything. He just stared at her with his crystal blue eyes, quizzing her… and for reasons she couldn’t understand, drowning her.
After a while, he said, “But it did happen, honey.”
“Yes. And I hope we can just forget about it. Like… like we don’t know each other.”
“But we do know each other now.” He said. “Intimately, I might add.”
“Yes, damn it!” She was really irritated now. She doesn’t need this. She doesn’t want this. Sure, she would feel very insulted if she met him in the hall or in the elevator and he acts like he doesn’t know her, especially if he had another woman in his arms, which is most likely to happen. Although since she moved into her apartment and learned that he was her next-door neighbor, she has never seen him bring a woman into the building. But she thought, it would be much better and much more comfortable pretending she doesn’t know him than exchanging hi’s and how are you’s with him.
“But I was not myself last night. I needed an outlet. I needed to explore. You were there! And I was drunk more than half the time… and it… it got completely out of hand…”
He smiled. “I knew that.”
She waited for him to say something more. But he just stood there. An eyebrow shot up.
“Damn it, say something!” She demanded.
He smiled. “Alright. You’re cute. And you’re cuter when you get mad.”
She took a deep breath. “What do you want, Justin?”
He shrugged. “Actually, I’m not sure.” He admitted.
Then he walked a step closer. She walked a step back, her heart pounding in her chest. He looked so divine in his black jeans and leather jacket. His hair still looked wet, which means he went to Starbucks straight from the shower.
He kept walking towards her and she kept backing down, until she hit the wall of her living room and Justin pinned her between it and his body. She stared at him squarely.
He tilted her chin up and she almost panicked when his face descended towards hers. He kissed her. Once. Softly. Then his arms went around her waist and he deepened the kiss. Her knees went soft and she felt her nerves come to life. She doesn’t need that coffee he brought. She was already awake with his kisses. No, not just his kisses. The idea of sleep evaded her the minute she opened the door and found him in front of her. She wrapped her arms around him and kissed him back. For a minute, she was almost lost.
He leaned his forehead against hers, his eyes closed and he took a deep breath. Then he looked back at her. His face no more than four inches away from hers. His lips were curved into a crooked smile. She bit her lower lip, and then she started smiling. He was smiling too. A real smile, which showed her that he has perfect set of teeth and dimples on each side of his lips. He looked more charming and more handsome this close than he did whenever she saw him around her building submitting his works for Blush.
He pinched her gently in the nose. “You better take that coffee of yours.” He said.
She nodded. She started to move towards the table. But both his hands were now on the wall beside both her ears, caging her.
“Hey, you said coffee.” She protested quietly.
He raised his brows. Then he gave her a quick smack before getting out of the way. He took his own coffee.
She took a seep of hers and took out a pack of cigarettes. She went to her balcony. He followed.
They sat there quietly for minutes.
When she looked at him, she saw that he was looking at her.
“What?” She asked.
He shook his head. “Nothing.”
“I can tell you were staring at me behind those shades of yours. Like you were sizing me up or something. What?”
He shrugged. “What’s the deal with you?”
“What deal?”
He shrugged again. “You said you were looking for an outlet last night. For what?”
“Nothing.” She sighed. “I just didn’t want to live by the rules for once in my life.”
“Rules of?”
“My parents. The whole mundane values they taught me for all of my life. Like everyone expects me to be goody-two-shoes… and yet I still wasn’t good enough. So I thought, who cares? Screw up for one night. Well… I wasn’t literally thinking screw!”
He laughed. “I’m sorry. I wasn’t planning to screw someone when I approached you. I know you and you looked different last night… yeah sort of not what anyone would expect you to look like and behave. I came alone for a drink. I realized you were alone too. So… I just want to introduce myself to my next-door neighbor.”
“And you knew her too well now!” She said sarcastically.
He shrugged. “Not at all. I believe girls like you have layers in your personalities. And you don’t see that too often nowadays.”
“Girls like me have secret identities hidden in our closets. You met my alter-ego last night, by the way.”
He laughed. “I have a feeling you want to forget what happened to us last night.”
She stared at him seriously. “You’re not exactly a nobody you know. Honestly, you’re the last guy I expect to be involved in a one night stand with.”
He raised an eyebrow. “So that’s what it is. One night stand.”
She looked down on her fingers nervously. “Yeah… I guess so. It was not supposed to happen. But it did. I got caught up in the moment and my curiousity made me go overboard. I’m the last person you would want on your list anyway.”
“My list?” He asked, quite surprised.
She stared at him. His face is devoid of any emotion.
“You know… the long line of girls wanting a piece of you. I didn’t want any of that. It just happened. It was a mistake. Cross me out of the list of girls who expect you to return their calls.”
“I think I didn’t have to return your calls since you probably will not call me at all. But then again, I guess you know my reputation more than you know me.” He said.
“I don’t know you at all.” She said squarely.
“You know me more intimately now.”
She turned red. He laughed.
“And you can get to know me on a personal level. For all it’s worth, I hope we can be friends.”
She shook her head. “No. I don’t move in your circles. It would be so hard to keep that friendship going. Plus, you live in a world where everything you do almost makes it to the newspapers or gossip columns. You’re one of Manhattan’s most sought-after bachelors. It would be very hard to be friends with you. I don’t want to be named. I don’t want my girlfriends to be asking about what’s happening in your life. I’m not interested in that.”
He stared at for a moment and then he asked, “Boyfriend?”
“What?” She asked back.
“I’m thinking you have a boyfriend.” He said.
She stared back at him. So he really is a smart ass! Harvard straight A’s. It seems that part wasn’t a rumor.
“What made you say that?” She asked.
He shrugged. “Nobody trashes down an offer for friendship if it won’t cause havoc to something monumental in their lives.”
She stared out at the line of buildings that make up her wonderful New York view.
“How long have you been with this guy?” He asked.
She sighed. “Three years.”
He almost choked on his coffee.
Adrienne looked at him seriously. She heaved a sigh. “I know. How did I manage to lose my virginity just last night? And not to him?”
“I didn’t ask the question. You did.” He said.
She raised a brow at him. “I asked it so I wouldn’t have to say the answer out loud.”
“Your call.” He said coolly. But if she could see his crystal blue eyes beneath those pair of shades, she knew they were dancing with laughter.
“Shit!” She cursed silently.
“What?”
“What is wrong with me? I don’t even feel guilty about it!”
He shrugged. “You don’t love him. Maybe you’re keeping him because it seemed like you were taking the righteous path.”
She stared at him, unable to believe that he was able to analyze her almost to a T. “One more psychoanalyzing me and you’re out of here, mister!”
He laughed. “Come on, get dressed. Let’s go have lunch.”
“What? Why?”
He shrugged. “I’m asking you to go to lunch with me. And why not? That answers both your questions?”
“Where?” She asked again.
He smiled and again she saw how deep the dimples beside the corners of his lips were. “Somewhere no one knows both of us since you don’t want people to know we know each other.”
“Great idea! It’s easy for me. I can eat at Burger King and no one would notice. But it’s kinda hard for you.”
He raised a brow. “Who do you think I am? Brad Pitt?”
She laughed. She stood up and went to her room.
She realized that she has just accepted his offer for lunch without any protest. With questions, yes. But not protests.
She slipped into her white Capri cargo pants, and a white mini T-shirt. She tied her hair in a pony tail. No need to put anything on her face. She doesn’t need to impress Justin Adams. She already slept with him! And she wasn’t planning to sleep with him again. In fact she doesn’t have any idea why she is going to lunch with him when she should have seen the last of him when she left his apartment this morning.
When she got out of the bedroom, she knew he was staring at her behind his shades.
“What?” She asked.
He just shrugged, and then he leaned forward and gave her a gentle smack on the lips.
On the elevator, he took her hand in his. Her heart pounded at the touch of his skin.
What is it with this guy that makes her feel like she’s being electrocuted? This could not be from the tequila anymore. She never felt this way with Troy. Not even when he kisses her goodnight.
When they reached the ground floor, she pulled her hand away from his grip.
He looked at her.
“Bad idea. You: Celebrity. Me: Supposedly spoken for.” She said.
He smiled. “Alright. Miss Miller.” He held out his hand and motioned for her to go out of the lift first when the door opened. “After you, Miss Miller.” He said, his voice full of laughter. Obviously, he was mocking her.
She raised a brow at him crossly, and to her surprise he mouthed, “You’re a fox!” Which made her blush even more.
He led her to his Red Ferrari. She noticed the dark tint on the windows.
“Great! Maniac tint!”
“Good for your plan, right?” He said and he opened the door for her and she hopped inside quickly.
He took her for a drive. They chatted more about themselves on the way. Adrienne expected to be uncomfortable. What could she possibly talk about with the city’s most wanted?
First, they were so different in many ways!. He’s an heir to a multi-billion family business, and was born with a silver, maybe even platinum, spoon. She was born in a middle-class family, whose genes she barely inherited. He was a creation fit for the gods. Her own mother doesn’t even think she looks a bit okay. He was smart beyond belief and graduated two degrees with flying colors. According to her mother, she only graduated with honors because her major was ‘piece of cake’. He was too high up in a pedestal. Her own family and her own boyfriend cannot even be proud of her for a minute.
But as she was sitting in Justin Adams’s sleek Ferrari, she was surprised that she was able to relax, not care about how she looked like, what she will say next, or where he is taking her.
“How long have you been with Blush?” He asked.
“Almost like forever. It’s my first job.” She replied.
“I heard you were good.”
She shrugged. “I’m getting a bit bored sometimes you know. I needed more action.”
“Judging by the way your colleagues talk about you, it seems you’ll be destined for more soon.”
“I can’t believe Justin Adams engage in gossips.” She rolled her eyes.
He chuckled. “No. I have ears. Guys in your office talk about you a lot, you know.”
She looked out the window. “Probably because I was the most boring girl in Blush. Smart but boring.”
He looked at her and then he turned to look back on the road.
“No. Try smart, snob and undeniably gorgeous.” He said.
She laughed sarcastically. “Don’t think so, Mister. The smart part is partly flattering. The snob part is probablytrue. The undeniably gorgeous part is undeniably a lie.”
He chuckled. “No. Clearly, you are mistaken. You should think more of yourself. The undeniably gorgeous part is undeniably true. Take it from the guy who approached you at a bar, ended up spending a wonderful night with you, and made amazing love to you.”
She stared at him. She knew she turned so red, she could be turning violet already.
“Must you always bring that up?”
He looked at her for a moment and then he shrugged. “I’m sorry. I forgot. You wanted to forget last night. But hmmm… the woman I made love to last night was confident… and foxy. I wonder if she’s just sleeping there somewhere inside you.”
“I tied her up so she could never come out in the open again.”
“It’s a pity. She’s a fox.” He said.
She didn’t say anything. She didn’t know what to feel. Flattered? Because Justin Adams is saying that she’s gorgeous. Embarrassed? Because he knows that he was able to unleash a spirit within her that she didn’t even know existed. Scared? Because she knows his reputation and she suspects that she is currently tangled in his web and she’s his latest prey.
After lunch, he took her hand in his and led her to a small shopping center. She stared at him in alarm.
“Outside Manhattan. We don’t need to pretend we don’t know each other here.” He said with a raised brow.
She rolled her eyes but did not pull her hand away. They went around, holding hands, asking each other questions about themselves, like where they grew up and what courses they took in college.
“Wanna watch a movie?” He asked.
She shrugged. “Alright. I’m not too busy. Plus, you have the car. And I don’t even know how to get home.”
He chuckled and led her to the movie house. He bought popcorn and soda.
In the middle of the film, Justin reached out for her hand and held it in his.
There was a time that he brought it to his lips and kissed it. She stared at him. His features were illuminated by the lights from the screen. He looked just as her friends described him. Divine. He didn’t have his shades on. She could see his long eyelashes and perfect straight nose.
He looked at her and their eyes met. He smiled boyishly. And then he leaned forward and kissed her gently on the lips. He released her hand, raised his arm and put it around her shoulders. She rested her head on his shoulder.
After the movie, she was feeling brand new emotions. She doesn’t exactly understand what is coming her way. She didn’t ask for it. Least of all, she didn’t ask for Justin Adams to barge into her life and… take her to the movies and hold her in the middle of the film. That is something that Troy would never do. He firmly believes that movie houses are not meant for cuddling.
After the movie, Justin led her to another restaurant where they had dinner.
She must have fallen asleep on the way home. But she remembered that before she drifted off, Justin reached out and held her hand in his.
They were still holding hands when he woke her up with butterfly kisses on her cheek. When she opened her eyes, she was staring at his blue eyes.
“We’re home, Princess.” He said softly. And he leaned forward and kissed her passionately this time.
After the kiss, she was left breathless. He went out of the car and opened the door open for her. She realized that they were in his parking slot.
He put an arm around her as he led her to the elevator. She was too giddy to protest. Inside the elevator, he put his arms around her waist and again took her in a drugging kiss. The lift stopped at the third floor where they immediately stayed on opposite corners, as if they didn’t know each other. An old couple got in.
She counted up to almost an eternity before the old couple got out of the lift on the fifth floor. As soon as the doors closed, they met each other at the center, pulling each other, finding each other’s lips, locking each other in an embrace. She felt desire starting to take over her senses once again.
They half-ran to her room. As soon as the door closed behind them, they began undressing each other. Their clothes piling up on the floor leaving a trail to the bedroom. When the back of her knees hit the edge of her bed, all that was left on her was her white thongs.
He undid her. She realized that everything she said about what happened between them being a mistake that should not happen again…was a lie. A product of the real Adrienne Miller who wouldn’t do anything to disappoint her mother and her boyfriend.
He drugged her with his kisses. He intoxicated her with every touch. Until her mind was blank except for one word that she kept saying in her moans of pleasure—Justin.
She didn’t know how long it took. All she knew was that it left her senseless. When it was over, they cuddled in the dark. They talked more about each other. She giggled softly.
“Why?” Justin asked looking down at her.
She snuggled closer to him. “Nothing. I just realized that I am… having a pillow talk for the first time in my life.”
He chuckled. “And how was it so far?”
She shrugged. “Not bad at all. I feel comfortable, to be honest.”
He laughed. Then he said to her, “Your boyfriend must be blind or mad… or… impotent.”
She stared at him curiously. “Why do you say that?”
He shrugged. “You’re a beautiful woman. I just couldn’t understand why he didn’t work on… getting to know you… more intimately. Is he gay?”
She shook her head. “We just don’t see each other often, I guess. And he’s… probably as conservative as my mother. We don’t even kiss in the cinemas.”
“Really? I wouldn’t be able to resist kissing you somewhere dark.”
“Well, he’s like that. Plus he doesn’t live in New York. It has been more a long distance relationship.” And he didn’t make me feel the things you made me feel. She wanted to add that but she decided against it. Justin Adams probably knows that he is a cut above the rest of the male species.
“Well, unfortunately for him, he just lost the chance to to steal your innocence from you.” He said teasingly.
“You didn’t steal it.” She argued. “I gave it to you.”
“And I thank you, Cherie. I will never forget that.” Then he kissed her thoroughly again.
She prepared for a bath and he joined her. It was the most sensual bath she had ever had in her entire life. It was the first one she shared with a man. And even up to that moment, she couldn’t believe that she was sharing it with Justin Adams.
After the bath, they towel-dried themselves and he led her immediately to bed where he finished what he started in the bathroom.
By midnight, she was exhausted. She slept with her head rested on his shoulders and his arms wrapped around her. She was having the sweetest of dreams indeed.
=============
From Jerilee Kaye:
Little bit short I know.
If know you me, as what you've read in Knight in Shining Suit, you know I'm not a fan of cheating. :-) But the cheating part is not the central element of this book. It's about a girl whose confidence was crushed, and whose spirit was dying to come out! And sometimes, it takes the right kind of guy to pull the trigger.
Again, I remind you that I've written this a long time ago. Please don't compare it with the Intertwined and KISS. I just wanted to share this with you and I loved these two characters because they were one of the first romance characters I've created. I just decided to revisit this story and replot towards the middle part and give it a little bit more kick than what it currently has.
Thank you for your comments! I love reading all of them.
I'm trying not to make Adrienne cry since you complain about Brianne and Astrid crying all the time. But I guess I'm like that in a way. :D Hey I just cried today watching Wreck it Ralph! LOL!
Xoxo!