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Adria's dress on top
A D R I A
I stared at my reflection and all I saw were scars. Not scars on my wrist, not scars on my body. But scars embedded and marked into my mind. Even though I have everything a person could ever dream of, a perfect house, a perfect education, a perfect lifestyle, I could go on all day. I would say I have a perfect family because that's what everyone thinks anyway, but I don't. We're just simply messed up. I'm messed up, I'm not perfect like what everyone thinks I am.
It's like everytime I face the world, I put on a mask, a mask filled with emotions that I know I do not possess. I'm like an empty shell completely drained of emotion. Maybe it's the fear talking but to be honest, I don't really know anymore.
A million thoughts ran through my head as I smeared a nude colored lipstick on my lips and dusted a shade of summer rose on my pale cheeks. I brushed my black cherry hair and walked out of my room into the only place where I actually feel at home.
The library. There's something about books that makes me feel alive. I get swept up into a whole other universe, and I forget everything that is happening around me. Books are my escape. They are my escape from the harsh reality we call life.
I put the book I chose yesterday, and finished, back into one of the many shelves. And I looked for another book to spend the day reading. I almost read all of the books in this library, I spend most of my time here than I do anywhere else. Since I was running out of books to read, my parents got me a a whole new collection to keep me busy.
I chose the novel 'Little woman' it's an oldie but a goodie. I lost count on how many times I've read it, but I know that the first time I read this book in high school it was love at first read.
I walked out with the book in my hands. My three inch heels clicking on the shiny marble floor. I didn't normally dress this fancy for a normal day, but today we're going out to have lunch as a family in one of my mom's restaurants.
As I walked through the long hallways my dad came out of his office wearing a sleek navy blue suit with a matching tie, and his Jimmy Choo's.
"Hi Dad" I smiled "Hey Adria, how are you today?" He asked looking through some files in his hands. "I'm fine" I replied "Glad to hear" he smiled as he quickly stole a glance from me before walking down the stairs.
He paused on his step and turned to me "Call your brother and tell him to get ready. We're leaving in a few" he said and continued to make his journey down the stairs.
You see my younger brother Asher, is the only thing that kinda lowers our reputation. Well that's what my parents tell him. He is known around town for drinking and getting wasted at parties. My dad absolutely despises him. My mom is disappointed in him but doesn't show her anger towards him as much as dad does.
My dad wanted him to inherit the company when he got older. And wanted him to start his training right after his graduation. but he refused and stuck to drinking. Why? Because he got his heart broken by a gold digging whore. Who was also my best friend through high school. Messed up right? Yeah I know. But it didn't affect me as much as it affected him. My parents and I told him to get a grip, and move on. We've tried everything, even therapy. But all it did was make him hate mom and dad way more than he already did. Nowadays it's like we've just given up on him.
I sighed deeply knowing that Asher is most likely going through a massive hangover right now. As soon as I turned the door handle to his room I immediately got the stench of beer and cologne. Ugh, boys.
His room was completely gross. I couldn't find the carpet from a layer of various items scattered about. It was worse than a polluted lake.
"Ugh Ash seriously?!" I cringed disgusted by the alcohol reeking through the air. He had an empty bottle of Jack Daniels and a half eaten pizza box laying on the floor next to his bed.
I rolled my eyes and tiptoed in between all the clothes on the floor towards his bed. I sat beside his snoring self and shoved him harshly.
He groaned loudly as I did and covered his face with a pillow.
"What time is it?" He mumbled groggily clutching his head in pain "IT'S TIME for you to get up. We're having lunch outside so get ready quickly" I demanded "Geez sis I didn't know you had a sense of humor" he deadpanned and stumbled into the bathroom.
I rolled my eyes and looked around his lame excuse of a room. I stood up and made his bed for him like I always did since he was a little kid. I just couldn't help it, it's just a weird habit of mine.
As I fixed it, I saw a picture peeking out from under his pillow. I picked it up and realized that it's of her, that imbecile of a woman who dumped Asher. Ew.
It was of her smiling at the camera with her long locks of shiny golden hair falling down her waist, and Asher was standing next to her looking at her lovingly. He's still in love with her even through the hell she's put him through.
Love. What it can do to some people. It completely shredded Asher's heart into a million pieces. This is why I have trust issues, this is why I don't like being social. I barely had any friends. But the ones I did have, they didn't even consider as friends. They just stuck around because of my parents, or they just want to get in my pants. And I'd like to keep it that way, it's better not to get too attached. I won't make the same mistake again. Trusting a whore who broke my baby brother's heart just for money.
I didn't even realize how long I was staring at that picture when I heard the shower turn off. I quickly put the picture back where I found it and walked out of the room like nothing happened.
As I walked down the spiral staircase I could hear my parents screaming at each other again about God knows what this time. It's like this everyday, I go down and see them fighting and ready to rip each other's throats out. But thankfully they never get violent. They just bicker about the littlest things.
I strolled towards the living room and leaned on the door frame, and watched them scream their lungs out. They didn't realize that this affects their kids as much as it does to them. Maybe even more.
They were a perfect couple when I was just an infant. But as I grew older and Asher was born, they started hating each other. I don't even know if they still slept on the same bed.
"YOU DON'T EVEN STAY AT HOME TO CARE! WHAT ABOUT THE KIDS? YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW OLD ASHER IS!" my mom screamed at dad with her arms waving in the air.
"OH YEA?! MAYBE IF YOU WERE A BETTER WIFE AND ASHER DIDN'T RUIN HIS LIFE FOR A LITTLE GIRL! THIS IS WHY I DON'T LIKE STAYING AT HOME, EVERY FUCKING DAY IT'S LIKE THIS!" My dad screamed back heaving with anger. I flinched due to the tone and strong language he was using.
Well that was harsh.
My mom looked at him with tears in her eyes "I try Matteo I try, I'm just tired of fighting like this" She whimpered. Dad's eyes soften "Amore... I'm sorry I didn't mean it like that" He cooed softly as he brought her into a tight embrace. Mom clutched his shirt as she cried her eyes out into his chest ruining most of her makeup.
They're a weird couple. They fight and then the next minute they're cuddling. I didn't even notice that somewhere in the middle of all that Asher came next to me and watched the whole thing.
My dad looked up and caught us staring at them. He pulled mom away from him and wiped her tears away "Go and wash your face we'll be waiting in the car" he whispered, she nodded and walked past us upstairs into her room.
"What are you wearing Asher? You look like a ganster from the streets. Go change" my dad commanded looking at Asher's attire up to down. He was wearing a grey V-neck with holes in it. With a light blue jean jacket and a red and black flannel tied around his waist. Finally his ripped black jeans and his favourite light brown timerland boots. This was his 'fancy' outfit. Asher rolled his eyes and ran upstairs to change knowing too well if he talks back it would cause a major fight.
I followed my dad out as he picked up a call from his assistant. We got out of the main entrance and immediately our black Rolce Royce Ghost drove up in front of us. The chaffeur walked up to the door, opened it and gestured for us to get in. My dad sat in the passenger seat while I sat behind the driver's seat waiting for Mom and Asher.
A few minutes later Asher and mom come in, mom having a fresh face of makeup and Asher changed into a white polo t-shirt with khaki shorts and sneakers. He even styled his hair into a neat quiff. Classy, just how I like it.
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So here we are sitting on a large table for four draped with a neat off white cloth. I looked up to the ceiling and noticed we were sitting right under the big and beautiful chandelier hanging from the high ceiling.
After our orders have been taken no one uttered a word until mom spoke up "So Adria honey, how are your classes going?" Mom asked with a sickly sweet smile. "It's going good, my exams are coming up pretty soon" I replied giving her the same look. "Well I know you're gonna do good, I know you didn't get that scholarship for nothing" She stated. I smiled back and muttered a little "thanks".
Asher is sitting next to me staring at his plate longingly like it's the only interesting thing here. "So Asher, any plans of graduating school?" My dad asked with a hard stare. Ugh, here we go again. What is with these two?
"I should be able to go back and finish my year in a month or two" he muttered clenching his jaw and looking away. "You said that last month, and the month before. Asher when are you going to get your act together? it's been what? Six months?" Dad asked looking at him with disappointment clear in his eyes.
"Not here" mom whispered pulling on his arm. He immediately shut up and just in time the waiters showed up with our food.
After the waiters were gone we all started eating while the only sound you could hear was the clattering of the cutlery against the ceramic plates.
I turned to look at Asher and saw him looking out the window with his jaw still clenched and his food untouched. After a while he broke the silence "I'm gonna go get some fresh air" he stated as he silently stood up and strolled out.
Dad rolled his eyes "he's never gonna learn is he?" He muttered under his breath.
Ten minutes passed by in a rush and Asher was still not back yet. My parents didn't say a word about it and continued eating. The atmosphere around me got so stiff and intense that it was almost suffocating.
"I'm gonna go check on Asher" I said wanting to leave this hell hole as soon as possible. I walked out of the restaurant and looked around hoping to find him somewhere. When I didn't catch any sight of him, I walked around to the side of the building to see if he was there.
There he was, leaning against the wall with one leg propped up behind him. What caught my attention was what he was holding up to his mouth.
A cigarette. Or what I liked to call it, a cancer stick. I knew he was an alcoholic but I had no idea he smoked.
I stormed up to him catching his attention. I snatched the cigarette off of his hands, threw it on the ground and crushed it with my heels. "What are you doing Ash?!" I asked breathing heavily with fury. He stared at me with emotionless eyes almost like he knew this was gonna happen.
"I just.. can't handle being in there. I feel so judged and..." He says shakily not being able to finish his sentence. "I know how you feel, that's why I came out to find you. Just couldn't handle it in there" I replied softly giving him a sad smile.
I looked at him and noticed his eyes were slowly tearing up. I've never seen him so.... Broken that I felt like hunting her down and making her pay for turning him into this huge mess. I pulled him into a tight hug and he just broke down in my arms crying into my shoulder. He's 6ft 4' and I'm 5ft 5' so you can imagine how that looks like.
"We should be getting back, mom and dad are gonna go nuts" I sighed pulling away from him. He nodded quietly and wiped his tears away.