( not edited well once again im sorry 😭 )
You sighed, laying on the fresh bed.. enjoying the scent from the clean sheets before it escaped and be repalced by the strench of body order and alcohol. You ran your fingers through your hair, and turned your head to where your cheek met the clean sheets. You raised your sore arms, and winced at the pain, bringing them back down letting out more air.
You looked down at your wrist and regret and sadness ran down you as quick as water pouring over you in a cold shower. Your wrist were bruised and cut, being sore to the touch. You placed your finger tips on one of the bruises, feeling the sharp numbness if pain shoot up your arm.
Its worth it...
Hes worth it...
It was worth it because you loved him.. You loved him, and thats all you needed, other feelings didnt matter anymore. You didn't need any other feelings except for love.
But you couldn't help it.. You really couldn't. You still felt alone and sad. No matter what you did.. no matter the distraction. You tried to keep busy.. But.. You didn't do much in the first place..
Clean..? Yeah.
Cook..? Well.. Sometimes.. If you had food..
What else was there to do..?
Tv..? Maybe.. But you couldn't concentrate... You would zone out somewhere 1000 miles away in an anxious place...
No matter what you did... The sadness and the loneliness seeped through.. And when you were upset, you tended to do the irrational.
Which led you to do something you regretted.
...
"H..hello..?" Your voice was shaky and stale. You were beyond scared and you felt your stomach do the tingly thing when you know that your going to be in huge trouble. " hello..?"
You smoothed your voice out but nothing could stop the trembling and horrid thought of what to say next.. Man.. You should have practiced this before...
" hello? Who is this..?"
" its um.. Its-"
"Um? I don't know an um."
" its um.. Its me.." Your voice shook and trembled.
" me..?" There was a loud sigh on the phone. "who's me..?"
" um.. Its.. Um.." You took in a deep breath.. "Its me.. Mom..."
The phone went silent and you could feel the shock on the other end.
" This... This.. Isn't a funny joke Jonna.." Mom said sternly into the phone. She sounded angry and hurt and you could hear that she was about to start crying. "this is too damn far.. You know damn well-"
" its.. Its not Jonna.. Mom.." You took in another breath, now about to cry yourself. "its me.. Y/n..."
There was a gasp and a whine on the other line.
" y-...y/n..?"
" y-yeah... Yeah.. Its me..."
You heard her sniffle and you could now tell she was crying. You sighed and felt another jab your stomach.
" i love you y/n... I love you so much... Please come home.." She sobbed into the phone. No words ever sounded sweeter... not even when jeff was saying them " im sorry.. Im so so so sorry y/n.." She sniffled. " well do anything for you to just come home.. I miss my baby.."
" mom... I can't .."
" but y/n.."
" i have a couple minuets left.. And i don't have too much money left.."
" then come home sweetie... Please.. Please just come home..."
" mom im stuck.. And.. I can't come home.. But.. I need your help.."
" what.. What do you mean..? Stuck..?"
" it's .. It's hard to explain.."
" help..? What do you need help with..? Whats wrong? Do you need money..? Are you hungry? do you eat? Do you have a place to sleep-?"
" im pregnant.." You held your breath.. And felt the heaviness rest on your shoulders "and i.. Don't know what to do..."
" pregnant..?" She sounded weak..
" y-yeah.. " you sighed.
" do.. Do you know how many months..?"
" no.. "
" did you just find out..?"
" yeah.."
We both went quiet and you felt tears come to your eyes.
" im scared..." You sniffled felling a tear fall.
" dont be scared sweetie.. Itll be alright.. I promise.. "
The beeps started, singling that the phone would end soon. You gasped digging through your pocket for change.
" shit.. Shit.. Mom.. Hold i.. I dont have enough money.."
" its ok.. Just listen..." I could feel her sad smile though the phone " i love you y/n.. I love you so much.. And im glad you're safe.. It'll be alright.."
The deeps got more rapid and you started to get more panicked.
" it'll be alright.. I promise.. And if its not.. Just come home.. We miss you.. We love you....."
The beeps got faster and faster.
" bye sweetie, mommy loves you."
The ladys voice came on and the phone call was cut off.
You sniffled and whinned, softly placing the phone back, placing your hands on the metal that surrounded the ancient payphone. Your arms shook as you held on tight for support. You shut your eyes tightly and whinned, gritting your teeth trying to swallow the emotional pain.
It didn't work
....
" startling news from f/n l/n runaway turn abduction case when a phone call was made to y/ns mother late friday afternoon... The call was made to her mother and lasted for five minuets. The call indicated that y/n was alive and well. But then later that same day.. Sexual pictures of an underaged y/n and a now fully gown y/n were uploaded by an anonymous person on the website fourchan, on a public computer late Tuesday night... People on the case say the photos were taken all the way from when she first went missing to now they're assuming. "
" the photos, startling in nature shows that y/n is presumed alive but not well.. Bruises and marks were found on her body.. But the causes of the marks were unclear.."
You could hear it all the way from your room...
Pictures..?
You thought for a minute, and you felt a jab of fear in your heart.. You shot up.. Quickly leaping off the bed, walking quietly down the hall as quick as you could while still remaining silent.
Jeff was on the couch.. Half asleep and not paying attention to the news. You caught the last bit if the story, the minute where they leave your picture on the screen so people know what you look like.
You stared at the image and your heart ached.
It was a picture of 16 year old you before you left, then that changed to a picture of you now. It was just a close up on your face, and it was kinda blurry but.. That was probably the only semi decent photo there was...
In the photo, you were looking down, your recently dyed hair was covering some of your face, and your face was smeared with make up. It wasnt really too accurate to what you looked like now. You stopped dying your hair a couple months ago, so it wasnt really Black anymore. You stopped wearing make up too, so you looked younger then you did in the photo. You were also sober now, completely, so you didn't have that glazed look or that stupid smile.
You blinked and the screen changed back to the news castors.
" if you know any information regarding to y/n we encourage you to go to the police.."
You sighed and felt tears form, feeling your skin heat up in embarrassment and shame...
"Jeff...?"
He jumped awake at the sound of his name, and looked around.
" what?!" His voice boomed shaking the room. You fell silent and felt a tear drop.
"What the fuck do you want?!-"
" .. Do you love me..?"
" is that why you woke me up?!" You groaned and relaxed. " fucking hell... Im going back to sleep.."
You wiped your eyes and walked over sitting next to him. He groaned and looked at you.
" why the fuck are you crying..?"
" .. Do you love me..?"
He groaned again and rubbed his face.
" what do you think...?"
" .. Yes.."
" then lets go with that.."
You wrapped your arms around him and he didnt push you off like usual.
" i love you.." You mumbled and he rubbed your back.. Resting his hands on your hips.
" do you..?"
" of course..."
He smiled and sat up, placing you on his lap.
" how much do you love me..?"
" a lot..."
He smiled agian and kissed your neck, wrapping his arms around your waist tightly.
" yeah..?" He whispered.
"Yeah.." You agreed breathless..
You loved him more then anything.. And anyone..
He pulled your hair back and sunk his teeth into your neck, making your squeak, digging your nails into him in pain. He pulled away, and dropped you gently on "table" in front of the couch. Pulling at your shorts, which you willing pushed down your thighs, slipping off your tank top, leaving you in just panties. He kissed your neck, trailing down your chest and stomach. You gasped arching your back, closing your eyes.
And just like that you didn't even know who the pictures were taken of.
...
" hows being sober?" He smirked at you, drinking more of his concoction of death.
"I dont mind it.." You smiled lying. Drinking wasn't the best, but being sober was definitely worse.
" you fucking hate it don't you..?" He laughed and drank more. You looked down not wanting to admit he's right. He bumped you and shoved his drink in your face. " come on stop being boring.."
" i can't .." You sighed.
" why..? Who's stopping you..?" He smirked agian and bumped you. " come on.."
" i can't .." You held your head down, and played with your hair nevourisly. " its fine im fine.."
He sighed annoyed and drank the rest of
His drink.
" follow me into the kitchen."
You nodded and when he got up you did. Following him like a lost puppy.
You sat on the counter as he mixed various alcohols together, creating somthing that no one should drink.
" drink it..."
" no..."
" drink the fucking drink come on.."
" no one should drink that drink.."
" just take a sip.."
" no..."
" take the fucking sip or ill make you drink all of it..."
" fine..." You felt a new rush of danger anxiety as you shakly brought the liquid up to your lips.
You could smell it. It smelled gross... like sharpies and toxic mixture of bleach and lemon juice.
" it smells..." you mumbled and jeff got more fusteratrd.
" just drink the fucking drink!" He screamed shaking you.
You put your head down, feeling fear grip your heart. But shouldn't you be use to that feeling by now...? Shouldn't it just be second nature..? If you always feel afraid... isn't fear your new comfort..?
" i don't want to..."
" for fucks sake!" He snatched the drink and your wrist, almost pulling you off the counter. He grabbed your chin, and shoved his fingers in your mouth, forcing it open long enough for him to quickly put the glass up to your lips, pouring the burning liquid in. You coughed and some went down your throat, making you gag and spit up, making the liquid in your mouth fly out and go everywhere, covering you and splashing on jeff. He took his fingers out and you closed your mouth, feeling the toxic substance in your nose, feeling it burn your throat as you were forced to drink the rest of it left in your mouth.
" god.. fucking gross... see what you made me do?!" He yelled shaking his hand and putting down the glass. " it shouldn't have been that fucking hard you dumbshit... god what are you?? A fucking child..? God i hate fucking children so you better shape the fuck up.. "
" of course you do..." you sighed keeping you thoughts to yourself where they belonged.
" why did you quit drinking..?"
You shrugged.
" i dont want to anymore.."
" alright now whats the real reason"
You bit your lip and your heart went a mile a minute..
Do you tell him..?
Do you have to tell him...?
You took in a deep breath..
" i.. don't.. want to be hung over anymore... last time i thought i was going to die..."
" is that right..?"
" yeah.."
" being hungover..?"
" yeah."
He stared at you and you looked down. You were so small in his eyes...
you were nothing but an ant that crawls up the wall..
You felt suddenly warmth and movement and you gasped suddenly being drawn in.
Jeff hugged you.
He wrapped his strong arms around your small frame.. and brought you in to his tight, warm, safe embrace.
" you know i love you right..?"
That sent chills and butterflies through your body..
It was so so so nice to hear those words.. to feel that long forgotten feeling.
" you promise you'll always love me..?"
" don't be stupid..."
You smiled and squeezed him tighter...
" Jeff..?"
" what..?"
" I'm pregnant..."