"How are you feeling Cara?" Martyn asked as he shuffled about with his equipment.
It was the first time I had opened my eyes since shooting him and my first conscious moment since John nearly killed me.
I moaned as I tried to touch my head.
"Oh don't touch there please," he advised. "I had to operate and you have a few stitches. It's only minor don't worry. A bit like having a fall and splitting your head open. It will heal quickly."
I couldn't talk. My mouth wouldn't work.
"I know you can't talk. I can see what you are saying though on here so just think it and I will answer ok," he replied.
I'm sorry and I am glad I didn't kill you.... I thought as I became weepy.
"It's ok, that wasn't you. You had a interception in your programme. Some how a ghost file was activated and you had no control. I don't take it personally," he said. "Hazards of the job and I think physically being in my presence activated it. That is why I don't like Muse's as I know that my face will be a target in all their heads now since I left. Last time we only spoke through glass and via web cam so it wouldn't have activated. It's ok, I am not angry with you," he said as I wondered if he was.
"You're awake," John said appearing in the doorway.
I wondered if he was going to try to shoot me again.
No... I thought. I looked over at Martyn and he shrugged as though apologising for answering me in my mind.
I felt totally confused and disorientated as John pressed his lips to mine. "How are you feeling?" he asked. I couldn't answer.
He looked to Martyn who just frowned as he taped some keys.
"Are you feeling ok?" John asked again.
Chips.... I thought as my mind whirled like I was on a spinning chair.
"Wait she is confused. It might be the emotional response of the fear she felt at seeing you mixed with the affectionate way you greeted her."
"Fear?" John asked concerned.
"Yes, you held a pillow over her head and she remembers the weight of the gun against her temple..."
"WHAT? She knows that happened?" John asked.
"Yes. I am trying to compensate but she is fluxing all over the place," Martyn replied.
"I'll come back later. I don't want to hinder her progress. If you need me just call," John said.
"What does that mean?" Martyn asked.
"That I will be back later," John replied.
"No not you... Cara what are the seven aims you just thought of?" he asked.
I couldn't focus.
"She is blinking to often, trying to focus," Martyn said.
A few minutes later he tried again.
"Find something nice to think of. A recent memory," Martyn asked.
I tried but my head was hurting and I felt sick. I had a memory somewhere... oh god what was it again.... Erm.... Arggghhhh... how frustrating... it was on the tip of my tongue...
"What is she thinking now?" John asked.
"Custard.... Frog... Funny....," Martyn replied.
John laughed.
"Are you trying to remember puking trifle all over the French girl and finding it funny?" he asked me and was highly amused.
"Yes, yes she is and she finds it hilarious," Martyn replied. "Well done Cara," he said praising me. "Fear to humour, great jump in emotional control."
"You're wonderful," John said praising me.
It made me feel proud for a moment but was quickly replaced with upset as tears rolled down the side of my face.
"Bad..." Martyn read from his screen.
"You're not bad," John said as held my hand and kissed my forehead. "Don't cry. No one is going to hurt you. We are making you better."
"People.... Small," Martyn read out again.
"The children?" John asked.
"I think so," Martyn replied.
"They are fine. We will get you fixed up and you can come see them," he replied.
"Aimee," Martyn replied.
"She is confused like you," John replied. "We are helping her too. She is walking about but doesn't like to be touched or spoken to directly. She isn't eating or drinking and falls over quite a lot so she cries but won't let anyone near to comfort her."
I closed my eyes, tears falling as I tried to get my head together. I had to get well and go save my baby. She needed me. No one else could save her.... She needs me.
"Save... she is thinking about saving her baby," Martyn said.
"She can't hurt herself," John replied. "She is not of the age to recognise destructive programmes."
I felt relief.
"Rest a while," he said and stroked my hair.
"Boy..." Martyn said.
"The baby is feeding well and his belly is getting bigger," John replied.
"How long?" Martyn asked as I wondered how long I had been here in this state.
"Two days, so not long," John replied. "You haven't missed anything and Mina has the baby so he is spoilt and content."
"Ok you are the computer whiz. What is this programme?" Martyn asked John.
"What the hell?" John replied as he looked at the screen with the technician. Stood analysing it, "That is your seven aims," he replied after a few minutes and a lot of typing at speed. "Pleasure, admiration, seduction, submission, sexual preference, personality, appearance," John said. "Each one has a number of other programme underneath that are options. Its like a safety deposit box, if you put the right code in you will get any box in the bank.... Or all."
"I removed those before," Martyn said.
"Yeah they are hidden under the original code, they knew you wouldn't go back and check your own work. You would be confident the problem lies elsewhere. They are shadow files," John replied and I heard him taping away on the keys.
"Do you know how long it took me to get rid of those before! I am not a bloody computer programmer!" Martyn complained as he stormed off rummaging in paper files.
"I think you are forgetting something," John replied.
"What?" Martyn said as he looked up from his mass of papers.
"I am," John replied. "I can get rid of it but how do we know what damage it will do her."
"Just check for back doors in the programmes and use the testing screen. I have the previous code printed out here somewhere," he said.
"What is that there?" John asked and pointed to the screen.
"That is your wife," he replied. "It's all over the place as she is confused but its simple binary with a... well I don't need to tell you I think you can work it out, geek."
John sat typing away and I waited for them to speak to me.
"Jam?" John asked Martyn.
"Yeah there you go, you've got it, an insight into what women think and she is thinking Jam," Martyn said and laughed.
Hi beautiful... I thought. I've missed you... I thought. I realised it was John writing to me.
Sheppard.... I thought.
He laughed as he typed away so fast it made my head fussy.
That doesn't make sense... I thought. Try again... I thought as John inserted words into my mind.
Hi John... I thought.
Well done... I thought and John smiled as me.
"Are you hungry?" he asked out loud.
Big.... I thought.
"Very hungry?" John asked.
Today.... I thought.
"I will get you some food," he said and took out his phone to make a call as Martyn started to shine a light in my eyes.
You can go back to sleep sweetheart, I just need to do some work on the programme and dinner is on its way.... I thought.
I closed my eyes as he worked on the programme.
"YES!" John said and put his hands in the air rejoicing which woke me up. "She's back," he said. "Its like a drop of rain in a puddle. It dripped into the programme and flooded it. Causing a ripple effect which means that I can pull it back from the sides but I just need to ensure it is both stable and fluid before I remove it completely."
"Geek!" Martyn said rolling his eye but secretly rejoicing in that fact he was not going to have to pick away at the programme.
"You think I'm a geek wait till you see Gordon," John replied. He took out his phone and called him. A few minutes later Gordon arrived in the room.
"She's awake," he said smiling.
"Yeah but confused. Look at this programme," John said moving out of the chair for Gordon to sit in it.
Gordon's whole body took on a different identity as he blocked out the rest of the world and got lost in the screen in front of him. He looked back at me and back to the screen before typing.
Say A, B, C for me.... I thought.
Gordon looked over again. He shook his head annoyed and frustrated.... "Hmmm," he said as he banged away at the keys. "Say A," he asked.
S... I thought and got annoyed so tried again.... F.... I thought..... I tried again.... K....
"Ok don't worry Cara I see now, just wait a minute and I will help you," Gordon replied and after a few minutes later and a bit of a conversation with John they both turned and looked at me.
"What you looking at?" I asked out loud.
They both laughed their asses off.
"Welcome back missy," Gordon replied. "Now mind that tongue of yours. There are plenty of husbands out there who would pay us a fortune to put that code in their wives head to stop them nagging," he joked. "I've just got to strip some of this code out of here. You can rest," he said.
I'm bored... and hungry I thought.
John walked over and pulled out his phone. Flicking through a few things he plugged in some head phones. "Here we go," he said. "Listen to this whilst we help you. You have to relax though." I nodded as he put the headphones in my ears but not too loud so I couldn't hear them talking. It was an audio book.
"Thank you," I said.
"We will give you something to eat as soon as we can be sure you won't choke on it," he replied so just have a quick sleep whist we fix you," he said. I nodded and pouted my lips for a goodnight kiss like we usually do in bed before snuggling down. He smiled and bent to give me a kiss. His lips touched mine and it was like being back in bed with night time giggles all over again. He pulled away but I wasn't finished. I pulled him back and his kiss deeper. He pulled back, "What programme is this? I like this one, leave it in," he said to Gordon and they laughed.
"It's not a programme, its all her," Gordon replied.
John looked at me and I smiled mischievously.
He went in for another kiss and I met him with a kiss of my own.
"Stop snogging the patient," Gordon yelled over.
John laughed gently against my kiss. Gave me one more quick peck and walked over to help Gordon.
I listened to the book and relaxed until I got a huge pain in my head and the feeling of cold water rushing down the side of my face.
There was a commotion as I felt my body convulsing. It felt like my body was having an earthquake of its own... help I thought.
"Give her two more," someone shouted. "Hold her down."
"Nearly there," someone else called as my body rebelled against whatever they were doing.
"FUCK!!" John said beside me. "Gordon hurry," he urged.
"John get over here!" Gordon called.
I lost consciousness.