12/4/16
"WHY DIDN'T YOU tell me you were going down to Easton with Chase for break?" Grayson scolds me over the phone.
I shrug through I know she can't see me. "I don't know it was last minute," I explain lamely. I want to tell her about pretending to be Chase's girlfriend for his family. She's my best friend. My confidant, the closest damn thing I have to a sister. But I know she would disapprove of what I'm doing, but what she doesn't know is that this isn't only about Chase anymore. It has to do with his brother as well, and that's a part I'm just not ready to discuss yet. Even to my best friend.
"Well if I would've known I would've joined you down there for break," Grayson declares quickly.
"You needed to go home and spend time with your family Gray," I point out with a small shake of my head. She needs this time with her family and Cale. Time away from Easton, away from everyone else, and just be in her hometown with her boyfriend and loving family.
"Yeah, I guess," she relents quietly.
"How are your parents? I miss your mother," I question attempting to change subjects.
"You miss her cooking," she laughs correcting me.
"You're not wrong about that," I agree as a smile plays across my lips.
"But she's good," she admits. "I think she's really enjoying having us all home at the same time for once," she tells me. For a long time Grayson hid from her family, and after last summer she's been trying to be better about it and make sure to put her family first. Of course Cale helps always pushing her to do what's best for not only herself but for her family.
"How is it with Cale?" I pause then add, "And Bailey?" I know things weren't always easy with her sister, and she didn't help matters last summer in any way. But sometimes things have to go to complete shit for us to finally turn them around, and that's exactly what Grayson did. Now, now they are closer then ever. Their relationship finally growing in the direction my best friend always wanted.
"My parents love Cale," Grayson confirms bringing me back to the question I asked her. "That's never changed," she notes. "But I think it's still an awkward situation for my parents to handle to see me dating Bailey's ex-fiancé. But at the end of the day they can see how well we work together," she says.
"I was the number one supporter of the I Hate Cale Hasting Club," I tease though the statement is entirely true. "And I even love you two together G," I assure my best friend.
"I know you were," she acknowledges with a chuckle. "Also Bailey is good, she brought her boyfriend Greg so it's been great," she adds.
"How long have they been dating again?" I ask, knowing that Bailey's relationship with her boyfriend has been her longest one so far. As well as the most positive one in her life, which she deserves more then anyone could know.
"Almost a year I think," Grayson estimates not knowing the exact time span but knowing it's been significant for her sister.
"Wow, go Bailey," I remark. "Must be getting serious."
"It is, I've never seen her so happy," she beams. I can hear the smile in her voice, and it makes my lips turn up in happiness for Bailey.
"Good for her," I respond simply.
"It's just so weird sometimes," Grayson divulges out of nowhere.
"What?" I question not knowing where she's going.
"I dreamed of this when I was sixteen," she tells me quietly as if she speaks too loud her dreams may burst and fade away.
"Dreamed of what?" I ask gently pushing.
"Having Cale by my side and spending time with him with my family and—"
"You have it now," I tell her confidently.
"Five years later," she scoffs.
"Yeah, maybe it took some time but you got your dream," I respond positively. "Your happy ending," I tell her with my whole heart.
"Thanks," she replies to my encouraging words. "And now it's time for yours," she teases.
I roll my eyes even though I know she can't see my face. "Yeah right G," I say as sarcasm drips from my words.
"What? I'm serious Hayley! You're a catch and you're going to find a great guy," she exclaims supportively.
That's the issue when your best friend finds love. She believes everyone else needs to also. Even when there's no piece of me looking for love in my life. I've seen how love can go wrong and how much that can change a person. It's why I keep everyone, including men, at a distance. They're only good for one thing that I am sure of in this life. That and my love for my best friend, that's all I want or need in this life. Okay, maybe throw in a few books in there as well.
I check the time as I pull the phone away from my face. "Hey, I'm meeting Kylie for lunch so I'll call you later," I tell Grayson as I pull myself off of the bed and slip on my sandals swiftly.
"Oh, tell her I say hi!" Grayson shouts excitedly at hearing I'm hanging out with her childhood friend.
"You know I will!" I chuckle with assurance.
"Okay, love you," she says as the call comes to an end.
"Love you too Gray," I reply and end the call as I walk out the bedroom door.
* * * * *
"Kylie!" I shout as I walk into the beautiful Italian restaurant spotting the cute brunette in the back corner. Grayson always talks about Abbiocco, and I sadly didn't have the chance to visit last summer when I was here for a few days. She always raves about their pasta carbonara, and Grayson knows my deep love for pasta. Actually it's more of a deep love for any carbs if I'm being honest.
She immediately stands and wraps her arms around me. I've only met Kylie a few times here and there after last summer, but we instantly clicked. Her short frame comes off sweet as candy, but her light green eyes show off the sassy fire that lies within her.
We sit down at the clothed table and make ourselves comfortable. "How have you been?" I ask quickly with a bright smile coating my face. I didn't realize how much I needed this until just this moment. In the midst of living a lie for a month I need a friend, someone I don't have to be anything but just myself for.
"Good!" she sighs with a small chuckle. "My kids have been crazy this last semester so this break is much needed."
Kylie teaches at the local elementary school, and she doesn't love anything or anyone more then she loves kids. She could be in the bitterest of moods and see a child and instantly light up. As someone who isn't the biggest fan of children I honestly admire this more then I care to disclose.
"How you teach those little rugrats I will never understand," I confess playfully giving her props. "But if I ever, and that's a big if," I emphasize, "ever have kids I would definitely want you as their teacher."
"Wow, thanks," she smiles genuinely. "Coming from you that's a big compliment," she teases.
"I know you should feel lucky," I wink.
"So how's you're break been so far? I didn't know you were staying with the Hasting's," she asks as she takes a sip of the water that has been placed on the table when I arrived.
"Yeah, well—" I begin when the waiter walks up and my mouth shuts immediately not wanting to get into everything in front of the stranger.
"Hi ladies," he starts with a grin. I take in his tall frame and messy hair in his little uniform. He is very cute I can't lie, definitely the type I would take home and kick out the next morning. "I'm Finn and I'll be your waiter this afternoon," he introduces himself his eyes openly washing over me in my tight sweater.
A smirk paints my lips unintentionally. "Nice to meet you Finn," I schmooze. The flirting sliding out of my lips before I can even stop myself. Not that I really want to when a guy is as cute as this one is right now.
His eyes lock on mine and his face flushes slightly with a nod, almost as if I make him nervous. Almost as if he didn't expect me to be so vocal in return, and that only causes my smirk to grow.
"What can I start y'all off with today?" he asks pulling out his pad of paper and pen. I enjoy the slight twang to his voice more then I'd care to admit.
"I'll have an iced tea," Kylie tells him with a polite smile.
The waiter's eyes land on me next. "And for you?" he asks his bright eyes watching me.
"What do you suggest?" I ask leaning forward and placing my hand under my chin with a flirty grin coating my pink lips.
His neck flashes a shade of red and my grin grows. "Umm," he starts. "The Bellini is always a favorite," he suggests.
"I'll have that then," I say as I sit back in my chair as my right legs crosses over my left.
He nods before disappearing back behind the bar to get our drinks.
I turn my head slightly to meet Kylie's questioning eyes and tiny smirk. "You just can't stop yourself can you?" she laughs.
I shrug with a feign look of disbelief smeared across my face. "I have no idea what you mean?" I joke.
She shakes her head. "Hmmm," she mumbles. "I'm sure," she comments.
Finn comes back with our drinks and quickly takes our orders though this time I don't lay on the flirting as thick. He's cute, and he was fun for a moment, but nothing will happen with him. Not only is this a small town and rumors would fly fast, my mind is slightly hooked on a specific Hasting man. And I don't mean the one I'm supposed to be madly in love with.
"So back to you," Kylie begins. "How has you break been?" she asks once again.
The fun flintiness that filled me once is now replaced with the weight of the lies that fill my messy life. Because that's what I am to be completely honest. A mess. A mess that everyone wants a taste of but knows to stay away from. A mess that no one really wants.
"Can I tell you something?" I ask. If I were to tell anyone about my dishonesties at the moment it would be Kylie. She's going to be around the most during this break and if she comes over to the Hasting house she should know the lies Chase and I are spewing. While I don't think she knows much about Chase I know she knows something is up as she is very close with him and Grayson.
"Of course," she responds quickly not even missing a beat.
"Umm...." I trail not even knowing where to begin. "Would you believe me if I told you Chase and I are dating?" I ask a part of me thinking I can spin it. Believing she would buy it, just like his parents do, like his brother does as well. I hold my breath waiting for her reaction, when it expels just as rapidly.
Kylie laughs. She laughs hard and loud and long. My shoulders sag in defeat, but at the same time a wave of relief fills me just as quickly. She knows, or at least some part of her does to an extent meaning I can talk to her. When her eyes finally open and her gaze meets mine the laughter dies on her lips immediately. "Wait, you're serious?" she asks surprised.
"So you don't believe it?" I question slowly.
"Oh...." she breathes. "I mean I'm sorry maybe I guess I just didn't—"
"I'm not," I say cutting her off as the truth falls out of my mouth like word vomit.
"Okay," she says with almost a wave of ease crashing through her like my words were all some odd joke.
"I'm pretending to," I state instead.
"What?" she cries out in a hushed tone. Her eyes go wide and her lips part in complete shock as my words settle over her.
My eyes drop from hers not being able to hold her gaze. I can see the wheels turning in her head as she grasps to find the right words for this moment, but unsurprisingly she can't find them.
"I shouldn't be telling you this," I start. "No one knows, and I have to be able to talk to someone," I confide openly.
Kylie's eyes soften. "Hayley, I know we haven't been friends for a long time, but you can tell me anything," she promises me. "I'm always here for my friends, and you're my friend," she swears as a tender smile takes over her face.
I nod shaking off the emotions that threaten to take over. "Thank you," I breathe out. "Chase just didn't want to deal with questions for a break so he asked me to pretend to be his girlfriend," I explain. The words felt so weird to say aloud for the first time, to tell someone about the lies that have masked me for the last few days.
"Nothing was ever confirmed to me about Chase, but a part of me also guessed," she confesses as she lifts the tall glass of iced tea to her lips.
"How?" I question with furrowed brows and a wrinkled forehead.
A shrug lifts her tiny tan shoulders. "The three of us were really close last summer," she tells me. "And he never made one move and or even looked at a woman," she states. Her head tilts as her eyes fill with the obvious multitude of thoughts that race through her mind. "It's not like I ever really knew," she emphasizes trying to sort through everything.
"But a part of you did," I counter understanding where she is coming from. Chase isn't flamboyant personality. He's a man, who loves sports, music, and is a complete gentleman in every aspect of his life. But he rarely speaks or even looks at women, he's quiet about his personal relationships and rarely admits to his attractions. He's a silent personality until you peel back those layers and he lets you in. But once he does, once he trusts you with his truths it's everything.
"Like I said we were really close, and while Gray had a different relationship with him," she acknowledges knowing that Gray and Chase's friendship was close in a completely different way. The three of them also stuck beside each other for a whole summer of mistakes and mishaps. "Small things came to the surface, but I never questioned because it wasn't my place, and it doesn't change anything."
I nod in agreement. "He's just not ready to speak to his parents yet about anything when he's still so confused about his own feelings," I say almost defending him when I know I don't need to in the presence of Kylie.
She nods at my words. "I understand that, why explain who you are when you don't even know yourself," she says understandingly.
"Well his parents are very persistent," I begin. "Loving and amazing, but I can see where he's coming from," I tell her as thoughts of the Hasting parents weave through my mind.
"He just didn't want questions," she states in complete acceptance.
I shake my head. "No, he didn't. He just wants to be with his family on this break," I say.
"Does Gray know?" Kylie asks. I know she isn't talking about Chase anymore, well not in the way one might assume. She wants to know if I've told my best friend about my fake relationship, and a part of me can't comprehend why I haven't yet.
Guilt washes over me as the blood in my veins runs cold. "No," I state slowly.
Sympathy touches Kylie's expression and she reaches out to place her hand over mine. "It's going to be okay," she comforts me as her hand squeezes mine. "Just be there for your friend, and remember—"
"What?" I ask cutting her off.
"That I'll be here for you," she smiles and I have to hold back the tears that threaten to fall.