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RESTLESS HEART
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JINNY STARED AT THE MOON and all its eternal glory that was borrowed from the sun. Without the burning star that their entire galaxy revolved around, it would have been nothing. It was just a poor imitation of the blazing inferno that lit up their morning skies. Night was the desolation of its absence, the undoing of their endeavours.
A flicker from the crackling fire in front of her caught her attention, a small disturbance of the air that indicated the presence of another. Raulf sat on the log next to her as she mulled her thoughts over the burgundy wine in her cup.
"You're still angry," he stated. "You shouldn't. Anger is weakness, it clouds one's judgement."
"You're wrong," she told him. "Anger is what gives me strength. It's the fuel that's kept me alive all these years. Especially when they had me locked up."
He shook his head with mild chagrin. "It'll eat you up, until all that's left of you is an empty shell of who you once were. All the guilt will catch up to you one day."
"Are you speaking from experience?" she asked.
"Lexa and I were born from different mothers," he told her. "Our father was the clan leader before Indra. Lexa was born special, while I was ordinary. I resented her and the attentions she got from it, but they were simply childish notions."
Jinny glanced towards him curiously. "Why do you say that?"
"Costia was my best friend. She made me see where my true strength lied," he said. "She was my anchor, grounding me to the earth." He paused, then turned his gaze on her. "Do you not have someone like that?"
"Yes," she chuckled. "My greatest strength and weakness."
"Then you're lucky," Raulf told her. "To have someone like that in your life. Some of us have never had the pleasure of falling in love."
He stood up and placed a reassuring hand on her shoulder before walking away into the haze of fire light underneath the glow of the moon. Jinny took another gulp of her wine, grimacing slightly at the bitter aftertaste and the unsatisfactory warmth in her belly. She was barely aware of the time, but there was a nagging voice at the back of her mind that told her to sleep. Battle would be waged the next day, another gauntlet of survival to be fought.
"Hey." Octavia came over to take Raulf's place. It looked like she'd been waiting for him to leave. "How's it going?"
"Honestly?" Jinny smirked humourlessly. "Not that great, actually. I keep thinking that I should be anywhere but here."
"Bellamy'll be fine," the girl said. "He knows what he's doing. He'll deactivate the acid fog and we can march on Mount Weather. We'll get everyone back."
Jinny looked around furtively, making sure that no lingering ears were within earshot. "I hope so... because I've run out of ideas to keep the Grounders happy." She sat up straighter on the ground, leaning against the log behind her and turning her head to Octavia with an impish smile. "Hey, how 'bout you give me one those cool war makeup, huh? I'm already dressed for the part."
She gestured to the light armour made of black leather and metal tipped edged pauldrons that Raulf had given to her. Octavia laughed at her enthusiasm before nodding. "Yeah, sure! Got any suggestions?"
"I wanna look fiercer than Lexa," she replied with a grin.
"I know just the thing," Octavia said as she took out a box of war paint from her pocket. Jinny leaned forwards, jutting her chin outwards with her eyes closed as Octavia smeared the cold liquid around her eyes. She could visualise the pattern from where the girl's fingers glided across her skin. A bar across her eyes, fanning sharply upwards on the sides to her temples, then flicked downwards from her bottom lashes. Another line was drawn halfway up to the middle of her forehead and then along the bridge of her nose. Then a smear on her upper lip and down her chin.
When she was done, Jinny opened her eyes and tried to peer into the reflection of her wine. The image was murky, but she saw enough detail to like it. She turned back to Octavia with a grin. "Do I look terrifying now?"
"I'm shaking in my boots," Octavia laughed. Her face slowly fell when her eyes caught sight of something—or rather someone—in the distance. Jinny blinked and turned around to discover what had caught the girl's attention, only to find that it was Clarke exiting Lexa's tent. She turned back around, with a vehement glare in her eyes, taking another gulp of her wine. "What happened between the two of you this morning?" Octavia asked quietly.
Jinny shook her head in vexation, anger seeping into her voice. "The better question is: what didn't happen between us? Because there are too many reasons for me to give."
"Is it about the missile?" Octavia pressed, and Jinny looked at her with an expression that said it all.
Clarke chose that exact moment to walk forwards, crouching down low in front of them so that her face was lit up by the dancing flames. She glanced uncertainly to Jinny before smiling nervously to Octavia. "Everything okay?" she asked.
"I don't know, Clarke," Octavia replied. "I've been going over and over it in my head, just trying to figure out how... you're still alive."
"Did Jinny tell you this?"
"She didn't have to. I saw you in Tondc before the missile hit. I know you, Clarke, something was wrong. And then you and Lexa disappear, and just happen to survive?" She paused, gazing intently at the blonde opposite her who had averted her gaze to the ground. "Tell me you didn't know it was coming."
Clarke bit her lip before whispering, "Octavia... I..."
The glare in the girl's eyes sharpened when her suspicions had been confirmed. "You let all those people die." She stood up heatedly, walking around the campfire towards the other girl. "You were going to let me die. Let Jinny die."
Clarke got up to stop her, lowering her voice as she spoke. "I did it to save Bellamy. So that we could win this war." Jinny scoffed derisively and she spared her a glance before continuing, "If we had evacuated Tondc, Mount Weather would have known someone tipped us off. They would have found Bellamy, found your brother."
"No," Octavia said. "Bellamy would have never told you to do that. He would have found another way!"
"I couldn't take that risk," Clarke told her.
"Right," Octavia sneered. "Because you're in charge now, and you decide who's disposable. You'd have fit right in on the council." She spat the last few words before storming off.
Clarke turned to Jinny and took a couple of steps forward. "Do you think I wanted to do it? I didn't have a choice. I was doing what I thought was right."
Jinny sprung up from her rest and grabbed hold of the girl's arm fiercely with the flicker of a blazing intensity reflected in her dark eyes. Her voice cried out softly as Jinny's fingernails dug into her skin. "This is not a game, Clarke. You don't get to play with people's lives and expect them to be okay with that. You sent Bellamy on a suicidal mission to the mountain, Octavia and I almost got blown to hell. More than two hundred people died in that blast. When will it end, Clarke? With all of us buried in the ground? You need to wake up."
The girl took in a sharp inhale of breath as Jinny roughly let go of her, before marching off after Octavia. She passed the Commander as she was exiting the tent, briefly making eye contact with one another as she passed by. The both of them had known about the missile and escaped together, leaving everyone in the village for dead. Lexa was no better and Jinny would remember that. She could no longer trust the both of them.
Having no other place to go, she wandered around the campsite in search of more drink. Her wandering brought her towards the fringe of the rows of tents, where she could hear Ryder speaking with Octavia.
"It is time for the southernmost guard post's rotation. You should relieve them," he said.
"Indra expects me to be on a scouting mission with Lincoln," she replied.
"Now you're needed at the guard post. Indra will join you there shortly."
There was the crunching of footsteps as Octavia presumably walked away to the other side of the camp. Jinny stepped forwards and caught Ryder's eye as he moved to follow after the girl. He stopped short once he spotted her and gave a curt nod.
"Raulf is looking for you," he told her. "At the western post."
"What did he want?" she asked.
"To speak with you," he said curtly, then left without waiting for a reply.
Sighing in exasperation, Jinny rolled her eyes and walked off in the opposite direction to where Raulf was waiting for her. She weaved between the tents, with its grizzly faced occupants glancing up at her as she passed. Some of the warriors nodded their heads to her in acknowledgement of her presence, which she thought was strange because she still thought herself of an outsider amongst them. But it was still better than getting lunged at, poisoned or cut by them, she supposed.
She finally made it to the edge of the camp and ventured into the tree line where the shadows immediately wrapped around her slim silhouette. Jinny stepped quietly through the trunks, keeping an eye out for Raulf's familiar portrait. She had gone as far as she dared to go, when the noise and flicker of firelight grew distant behind her, when she stopped in her tracks. The air was so still that she could hear every beat of her heart, and flap of her own eyelids, the pumping of adrenaline through her veins and creak of her bones.
As well as the rustle of an intruder.
Jinny quickly drew her blade and blocked the oncoming arrow that flew in her direction. She threw the dagger at the figure of a man hiding by the side of a tree and heard a soft cry of alarm before quickly drawing her handgun. Her wounds shifted and a sharp pain shot through her side, but she merely winced at it as she tensed her muscles. Jinny walked closer to the unfamiliar man, his eyes warily watching the gun that was trained on him.
"You're Trikru," she growled, examining his features and the prominent tattoos adorning them. "What do you want from me?"
He kept his silence, teeth gritted and jaw locked stubbornly. Jinny tilted her head to the side, a dangerous glint shining in her eyes from the stream of pale moonlight leaking through the canopy. "An assassin amongst our ranks," she hissed. "Targeting me?"
She grabbed the front of his shirt and roughly hauled him with her, spinning the man round and pressing her gun into his back. "Move," she barked, forcing him to walk forwards. They headed back towards the camp, and Jinny loosened her grip on him slightly to take on a more relaxed stance. But she had already seen his face, so there was no use in him trying to run. She would just go after him again.
Jinny arrived at the Commander's tent and pushed the man through the opening before stepping in herself. Her eyes went to Lexa's surprised expression first before shifting towards Clarke who was holding Ryder at gunpoint too. She then shoved her assassin towards the table in front of Lexa and drew the dagger from her belt. She slammed the tip of he blade into the middle of the man's hand, embedding it to the table in front of the Grounder Commander. He let out a grunt of pain and Jinny turned her cold gaze on Lexa who maintained her guarded façade.
"I think you misplaced something," Jinny said lowly before sweeping out of the tent.
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ALL RIGHTS RESERVED © KAYE CEE
DO NOT STEAL, COPY OR TAKE ANY PART OF THIS WORK.
[ author's note ]
can you believe there's only 5 more chapters to the end??
but also 3 more chapters until bellamy returns and jillamy will be reunited again!!