The snow is terrible, at least by my standards. I could do with a little layer, not embedded footprints. This reminds me of my brother, how he'd lament on and on about it, the few times he complained. All it made me want to do is migrate to a warm country.
To further ruin the day, it's the first New Year in seven years that I could possibly be forced to attend with family. "No way, no. My little 'record' will not end suddenly because I've chosen just this once to listen and at least live with you guys." I shake my head. "Seven years and counting will not come to an end because it's new years. I left that house for a reason, I intend to stay away. I'm only here cause of Tohru!"
"Only because of Tohru? When you moved in, you didn't know that Tohru would be staying too yet. And then you knew she was going to move out," Shigure says. "Just admit you like us boys."
"Sh-shut up! I've not run away yet because you'll tell Akito—"
Tohru walks in, setting down a round cooler. "What have you guys been arguing about?"
"Listen to me, Tohru-kun. These guys refused to go back to the Sohma house for new years!" Shigure whines.
"You three aren't going be going back? But Momiji said it was the main event of the year," Tohru ponders.
"That's right! It's a big celebration!"
"How big it is isn't the point," I mutter and am ignored.
"It's a big annual celebration where the Sohma family comes together. The best part is the banquet for only the twelve zodiac," Shigure says. "Only the twelve who are cursed can attend this banquet. Then, the zodiacs of old and new will perform dances. This year, Momiji and the year of the tiger will exchange. Three years ago, Yuki's dance was really beautiful! And even three years before that, Kuroi at least came for the banquet and---!"
My hair sticks right up in defence mode, like a bird's plume puffing up for defence on Planet Earth. "Shigure really does dance really bad! When I was a young child I heard he was wagging his toush-- just like a dog when it's owner comes home!" I squeal to shut him up as he turns red with embarrassment.
"Kuroi... so mean..." The tears stream down his face and I don't even bat an eye.
"There's no point in me attending, it's really for the main members anyways."
"It still sounds very fascinating! Just like the folk tale!" Tohru exclaims, clapping her hands together.
"And has nothing to do with me!" Kyo scoops rice into his mouth. "Cause the cat doesn't attend, so it doesn't matter whether I go or not."
"The cat is not allowed!" Shigure proclaims. "Just like in the folktale. It's how tradition has been passed down for years."
"... How can..." Tohru's voice trailed off in sadness.
"You shouldn't look so disappointed! It's the reason I'm not going anyways," Kyo says.
"Well, I heard you were going to go to your Grandpa's... but he's out on a trip to Hawaii, isn't he?" Shigure looks and Tohru.
"We can have fun here, Tohru-kun. Just like we've done every year."
"It's completely fine!" Tohru says. "You must have parents whom miss you dearly. You can use this as a chance to meet with your parents you haven't seen for so long. The new year is special, so you should celebrate! I can take care of the house while you are gone, don't worry!"
She pauses, remembering something, "I forgot to turn off the hot water in the bath!!" and rushes off.
"I can endure Akito..."
"Kagura isn't so bad..."
"Nope, I still don't want to see any of them," I remark with a shake.
Shigure chuckles. "Even these guys are going? What about your brother?"
It's no regular glare, the ones I usually give for every minor inconvenience. My whole body turns to ice as I look at Shigure. "Shut up about that bastard." The other two don't dare interfere.
I turn my head down. There's no getting past it. I know Tohru won't be okay. The first new Year without Kyoko. Without family. I know what it's like. But I feel guilty if I stay, like I don't believe her. Like I don't trust her.
"I'll go, I suppose." I stand up, putting on my boots and my long winter coat. "But if something--- whatever puts me off my seat I'm coming straight back!"
"Yeah, Yeah— you won't escape with everyone pinching your cheeks!" Shigure laughs, opening the door for us three to file out.
I eye Yuki and Kyo suspiciously, who never knew the full details leading out to leaving and then never coming back, but Shigure being older understood the whole thing. "Not a chance. The moment my mom and I set eyes on each other, party is over. I'm leaving before I jump off the balcony or she pushes me. Besides, they all hate me so what's the point in me sticking around for long?"
"Don't you try to call her?" Yuki asks.
My eyes narrow. "No. We stopped talking a long time ago, she doesn't want to. I don't either. She blames every issue on me, and she glorifies my brother. Treats him like a prince to be protected. I'm a threat to her financial security when I don't fall in line, so it's better we aren't associated at all. I don't know what my brother is like anymore."
"Meet him yourself!" Shigure snaps.
My face drops annoyedly, holding my head high. "Fat chance! I don't want to. I just explained he probably still resents me after all these years, that's the one thing that would put apart him and Tohru. He got so mad at me back then... I was pissed too!"
Kyo sighs, "What are we going to do with her? Tohru, I mean. She left her window open the other night."
"Did you go in?" Yuki side glares.
"N-no no! I just noticed."
"She trips down the stairs and even bumps into walls when she's walking."
"Well, she's definitely inattentive."
"No one lives around us, there's not really anyone to call for help," I remark, fully playing into the degree that I'll get to go back.
"Stop talking like housewives," Shigure scolds. "You're worried about them but you already made the decision to leave. Anyways... in today's newspaper they were saying there was a crime and they still haven't caught the criminal in the area..."
But it's not really a joke, now is it? I promised Kyoko to stay by Tohru's side, but here I am going a place that would be filled with hatred anyways. TO be so lonely... I know what it's like to be alone, so why am I putting her through that?
I stop in my tracks, five seconds left on the crosswalk.
"Oi, what're you doing? Don't stop on the road now!" Kyo hollers at me.
"I've... gotta go back! I forgot something!" I shout back.
"What?!"
"My family!" I yell, then turn back and run, narrowly avoiding a turning car that honks at me. I sprint the opposite direction, heading back to the house.
I swing the door wide open. "Tohru-kun!" The force cracks the door, but I don't care as I leap to hug her in her crying mess. I stroke her hair as she cries, observing the photo of her mother on the table solemnly. "Don't worry about me not going to the celebration... I wanted to spend it with you, like always. The only family I have is here."
The door slides open and in bursts Yuki and Kyo. They fall flat on the ground beside me, scaring me to death.
"Ah!" I hold Tohru tight like a child with a scream. "You ruined the moment!"
"Doesn't matter..." They say, panting on the ground. "We're... home..."
"Well, we must watch the sun come up anyways. Grab your coats and we'll go to the roof. I'll clean up," I offer, helping the girls stand.
Trailing after Kyo, who helps them up, Yuki stops at the doorway, scoffing at me cleaning the mud tracks. "You can put on quite the disguise. You weren't happy from the start. It didn't matter where you were going."
I look blank as he speaks, "I don't care. A promise is a promise. I'll be up in a minute."
A couple moments later, I scale up the building to join everyone on the rooftop. We wait in anticipation for the sun to rise, as I huddle close to Tohru for warmth.
"Look, the sun is coming up! Have you made your wish, yet, guys?" Tohru asks in excitement.
I close my eyes, making a wish in my head so that no one else will hear.