Why are the characters so... vain?
Example: I shot another enemy agent in the chest. Someone grabbed me from behind. "ANGIE, HELP!" I yelled. I took a glance at my coworker. "Do these jeans make me look fat?" I rolled my eyes. "HELP!" "Ew, no. I'll chip a nail," she whispered. The guy looked at me. "Dude, I feel so bad for you."
Why This Is Annoying:
How To fix This:
Me to the authors honestly:
Okay in like all the stories I read there is that one character. The one who always thinks it about them etc. I know people like that but why do we need them in the story? Unless if it is really important that you MUST have a vain character then I will allow it. If not then please think of other ideas.