-LF-
Seventh grade was a whirlwind as far as I can remember.
It was the year that I finally had Mr. Matthews as a teacher, and I could finally use him as some kind of father figure. At least he'd be better than my own.
When I first thought about having him as my teacher, I thought he'd be the fun, jokester type of teacher, but he was much more than that. He tied in life lessons with history and taught us better ways to deal with conflict. I became even more jealous of Riley everyday he taught because she had this man as a father and I knew he was there for her all the time. I didn't have that in my life.
It was also the year my Pappy Joe came to live with us. My mom thought it was better that he go to New York under our care instead of living with his caretaker, Cletis, at his ranch in Texas.
My grandmother passed away a year prior to us moving to New York and since then my grandfather turned quieter and quieter. So much so that with every update Cletis tells my mom, she becomes quieter and sadder herself. Eventually, she found the nerve to talk to my father about bringing him here.
My father never had the best relationship with Pappy Joe. Although the disdain was definitely not one-sided, I remember Pappy Joe having better self-control when it came to my dad. Even when my mom would remind him that they owed her father for so much, my dad stayed stubborn and voiced his opinion. There were a lot of friendly-worded arguments back then, and I was surprised to see it significantly change when Pappy Joe arrived at our New York apartment.
It was weird to see him when it wasn't a holiday and not having a jolly smile on his face. And it was sad to know that that smile was put on to hide how he really felt with Grammy gone. So I understood why he barely spoke to me or my parents during his stay. My dad, not so much.
I was okay with Pappy Joe with keeping to himself at home, but when I saw that he was starting to have a better relationship with Riley at Svorski's that's when I drew the line.
-
I gotta start from the very beginning of Pappy Joe's fascination with Riley Matthews, and that's her front cover of the newspaper because of the abandoned building incident.
There was something about Riley Matthews and that abandoned building. She was there first thing in the morning when everyone was on their way to school, and again, a couple hours after school ends.
She was usually alone on the fourth floor fire escape, either sitting and reading a book or leaning forward on the railing looking out into the view. It was odd to see her alone because she was almost always either with Maya and Farkle, but I never saw them on that fire escape with her.
I didn't know what the big deal was about that building; all I knew was that it was Riley's place.
The incident happened a couple of weeks into seventh grade. I was biking home after baseball practice and I saw that Riley's abandoned building was surrounded by fire trucks and people. I stopped to see what was going on and I see Riley bawling in the arms of her parents as they almost drag her away from the building.
Riley Matthews wasn't at school the next day, but her picture was on the front page of the newspaper. And Pappy Joe took notice of it. It was one of the only things he's talked to me about since he arrived at New York.
He had the newspaper on his lap as he sat beside me on the couch while I watched the game and suddenly started, "So Riley Matthews. Is she your friend?"
"Um...We're acquaintances." I shrugged, "And neighbours."
"So you don't talk to her?"
"No, not really. Why Pappy Joe?"
"Nothing, I just read about her in the paper. I think she's brave. It's really admirable what she did."
"Yeah I guess. I don't really get why she did that though. It seemed pretty crazy for just an abandoned building."
"Maybe you should ask her."
"Huh?"
"Maybe you should ask her what that building meant to her. People don't just do what she did for nothing." He patted my shoulder and stood up, "Don't let your father influence how you think of people, my boy. Think about people from their perspective."
With that, he left me with my thoughts. And I found myself looking at and treating people differently.
At school, I'd quietly look at people and how they behaved. I looked more closely at Zay and Izzy and why they were the way they were. I remembered why they wanted to be my friend in the first place and how they met each other.
I thought about myself and why I did what I did and thought about my dad. But then I also remembered that there must have been a reason why he was like that, too.
Then, I looked at Riley and why she was the way she was. I thought about the people in her life and her relationships with them. And I thought about asking her about what that building meant to her. But suddenly, I couldn't and I felt stuck in where I am. I felt that the only thing I was allowed to do was try to understand her for now.
And while I did that, Pappy Joe made himself scarce at home and was suddenly in the midst of Svorski's every day. And I was back to resenting Riley Matthews.
-
-RM-
After my dad told me to look at the whole being greater than the sum of its parts, I saw myself spending more time on THE fire escape to give myself some time alone to think about what he meant.
THE fire escape was my place. It was a spot I went to think and to be. There were no outside pressures put on me there; just me and the view.
Like my own fire escape outside of my room, I liked to sit there and watch the cars go by on the road and into the traffic. I liked to see the busy city fill up then gradually quiet down as the night came. But THE fire escape meant way more than just a city view.
My parents, my uncle Eric, and uncle Shawn moved to New York from Philadelphia a year before I was born and they managed to find a small apartment in a pretty old building. The four of them did their best to fit in such a small space as they shared all the responsibilities. They started their future in New York there and even managed to raise me there for a few months until the fire happened.
When my parents told me the story, they recalled the fire being at the opposite end of where their apartment was, but everyone who lived in the building was evacuated anyway. They said that the fire spread so much on the one side of the building that all of the residents had to be evicted because the building was so old they knew that there wasn't a way that it'd stay stable. So the owner of the building gave all the residents a discounted rate for his newly built apartment, and the old apartment was left abandoned.
But when I was six, my parents took me there and showed me their apartment that was still kind of intact. Since then, the building meant a lot to me because of its history, but it wasn't until fifth grade that I wandered on to the fire escape of my parents' old apartment and fell in love with it. I realized that it was a way I could hold on to a little part of their old life before me and I could experience what it was like when they used to live there.
THE fire escape was only on the fourth floor so the climb up wasn't as high as you think, but it was still high enough to have an amazing view. The building was in a spot where the sky wasn't covered by another building, and you could clearly see it change colour when the sun rose in the morning then see the sun set at night. It was also only a few blocks from my school so when I was there early, I would see all the kids pile up before the day started. And it was on a pretty busy street so I can just watch the traffic go by on days that I needed white noise.
Before seventh grade, I climbed up and paid attention to one thing at once. Maybe one day, I'd focus on how many honks I'd hear or how many people go into the nail salon, and then focus on another totally different thing the next. But after what my dad told me, I looked at the city as a whole.
I looked at the way the sunset reflected on all the buildings and cars, or how the whole street gets quiet at the same time every day. I looked at how all of elements of my city was affected by another and how different it would be if one of them disappeared.
I tried to capture it all on my camera, but I found that I couldn't include everything I wanted to fit in one shot. And I realized that there was really no picture I could have taken to capture the whole scene in front of me. And that's when I made sense of the whole being greater than its parts.
The city and street itself was the way it is because of the buildings and stores, the cars and buses, and the people live in it. If any of those elements were missing, it wouldn't be as beautiful as it is. I loved being on that fire escape because it was a part of who my parents were and because of all the things I could see when I'm on it. If there was a change, I wouldn't like the view as much as I do.
After that realization, I was at peace knowing that my city and all I knew would always be unchanged, and therefore, as beautiful as it always is.
I woke up extra early to help my mom at Svorski's the next morning, then ran to THE fire escape before school. Then, after school, I finished my homework quickly, so I could catch the sunset on my favourite spot in the world.
I was reading quietly on THE fire escape when I heard the trucks and bulldozers backing up beside the building. Slowly, the construction workers piled up around the building and I stood up in panic knowing what was gonna happen next. Some of the workers noticed me and started calling up towards me.
"Hey, little girl! You shouldn't be up there!"
"What are you gonna do to the building?" I yell out with fear laced in my voice.
"We're taking it down, the owner's been planning a better use for it with these big corporations. Now, you gotta come down!"
"No. I'm not going anywhere. You can't take this building down!" Tears started to slowly fall down as I sat cross-legged on the fire escape with my arms crossed.
One by one, the construction workers tried a different approach in getting me down as they all got on their escalator machine to get as high as I was. After half an hour of frustrated groans, knowing they couldn't place a hand on me, they gave up. But a few moments after, I look down and see my mom and dad climb quickly up to where I was.
"Riley! What are you doing? You have to come down, honey." My mom, although usually calm, had a panic-stricken face as she desperately tried to pull me along.
"Mommy, they can't take this building down! It was your home!" I cried.
"Riley, honey, this isn't our home anymore. We have a home and that's where you should be where you're safe okay? You have to come down." My dad tried to convince me but I cried harder.
"Daddy, please. Please don't let them take it down."
"Riley! We have to come down. Now." My mom tried her stern approach this time and I slowly shook my head.
"Riley! Come on. Please, honey. This place isn't worth your safety." I shook my head again.
"Riley! Now, please!" My mom tried again, with desperation in her voice and I slowly lowered myself into the fire escape.
As we headed down, the crowd of people that gathered around the building applauded while my tears refused to stop. When we were at the bottom, I bawled into my parents' arms as they guided me into car.
I kept crying until we got home and locked myself in my room until the next day. I assumed my dad excused me from school because he just left in the morning with a kiss on my forehead.
Yeah, I went to school the day after that but I couldn't pass the same way I used to. I couldn't bear to see the lot of the building empty. I couldn't handle looking up and seeing my fire escape gone.
My city was changed, and so was I.