Lucien
*
Lucia and I got closer when Harper finally broke up with the horse face she called boyfriend. I actually spent my birthday with my baby girl. She colored a picture of a tiger as my present. It was the greatest gift I ever received. I have it framed in my office, along with the countless pictures of us.
I've even introduced her to a few special people. We took a random flight out to Los Angeles one weekend to meet Tara and Charlie. Apparently Tara is one of Harper's idols because she almost fainted when she met Tara. Charlie and Lucia hit it off instantly. They sang and danced together, they even baked together. We left with promises of visiting Aunt Tara and TeeTee Char frequently.
Unfortunately when we got back, Harper changed. She started making up reasons why she couldn't hang with Lucia and I. There were times where she would hand Lucia to me or my brother and run away. She would purposely take extra shifts at work to keep from seeing me. It killed me to think that I made her uncomfortable. I needed to know what was going on. If I was to blame for her distance. When I confronted her about it, she cried. Seeing her cry made me feel even worse. I decided against pressing her for answers and just held her. The next morning, we pretending like the whole month never happened.
I got to see Lucia three times a week excluding the weekends. They usually spent those at my house anyway. Harper flat out refused to move in with me even though she and Lucia spend most of their time at my place. She mentioned something about children and lives intersecting.
"Lucien, I'm not going to say it again." Harper groaned as she unbuckled Lucia.
"Hi daddy!"
"Hi baby." Lucia leapt from the car seat.
"At least let me get you a new car." I offered, catching my external heart. She giggled and wrapped her tiny arms around my neck.
"No, Lucien. I don't need anything from you." Harper clipped. "Lucia, however, needs a little help."
I quirked an eyebrow at her for an explanation. She waved me off.
"In the house, her ears have been sensitive lately." She grabbed a purple folder with Lucia's face on it and walked toward my house. I sighed and tickled Lucia before following.
Harper was already in the kitchen mixing up a concoction for Lucia to drink. It usually had the vitamins that Lucia needed to take. Since Lucia is my blood, taking medicine comes with a fight. So Harper started making smoothies with the medicine mixed in. Lucia didn't seem to mind so, I left it alone.
I set Lucia down and watched as Harper frowned at the sippy cup in her bag. She tossed it in the sink and grabbed another one from the cabinet. She made sure to rinse it out thoroughly before pouring in the princess approved mixture.
Harper has been really germ conscious since Lucia caught strep throat the first week of school. That was the one and only time Harper agreed to stay with me for the week. And even though we slept in separate rooms, it was the best week of my life.
"You do know I know how to wash dishes, right?" I smirked, still leaning on the doorframe. She shrugged and called Lucia into the kitchen.
"Here baby." She handed her the cup. "You might have other kids I don't know about."
"Up please." Lucia sang. I groaned as I picked her up.
"You know you're the only one who has my seed, Harper, stop." I glared at her. She looked stressed. Her hair was twisted into a bun using a long sock and the slight bags under her eyes let me know just how little sleep she'd been getting.
She either needs a nap or sex.
She'll get both if it's up to me.
A few days after she became a single woman, we had an intense argument. That argument led to an incredible round of angry sex, that gave way to makeup sex, and goodbye sex. Now we just fuck for the hell of it.
"I know." She groaned while following me to the living room.
"Hey baby, wanna watch Nemo?" Lucia nodded and cradled her cup. I picked her up and walked into the playroom. I pulled out her mini couch and started the movie. I placed her stuffed tiger next to her that she curled into.
"Daddy be back, okay?"
"Kay!" She nodded, not taking her eyes from the screen. I kissed her forehead and backed out of the room.
Harper sat with her head in her hands. Her frustrated hands smoothed down her stray hairs. I sighed and walked over to her. I gently grabbed her arm and pulled her into me. She sniffled as she buried her head in my chest.
"Want to tell me what's wrong?" I asked softly. She shrugged. "Do you really think I have another kid?" She shook her head. "Why did you say it, then?"
She pulled away from me and gave a breathy laugh.
"Because I'm an insecure bitch who no one cares about." She mumbled, plopping back down on the couch.
"Eva?" I asked, she nodded. I had to stop myself from throwing something.
Eva went from being the favorite to the enemy in less than five months. I knew she had problems with Ruger and Harper but that was none of my business. We continued our friendship like normal. I was more comfortable with talking to her about my situation. We shared a common loss, Harper and Lucia. I went to her when I was too afraid to go see them. She was the one who talked me into crashing Lucia's birthday party. When things actually worked in my favor, she leaked a story about my bedroom endeavors and how I had multiple children out of wedlock. Harper found out and confronted her. Eva told her that the leak was retaliation for hitting on her. There have been problems ever since.
"What did she do?" I growled.
"Is... Is your ex- wife's new baby yours?" She stuttered as she played with her fingers. "It's really none of my business because we're not together. I don't even want to be with you. I just need to know. Ya know, for Lucia. So I'll be prepared to expla-"
Ouch.
"No." I grabbed her face. "I haven't fucked her since before Lucia was born. I haven't slept with anyone else since the first time at your apartment." A small smile finally graced her face.
"Eva said it's yours and that you were going to take Lucia away and get back with her. That you were going to give our daughter a real family. She said that I shouldn't fight you because of my past. You already know that I didn't want her at first and I couldn't wait to hand her over. She- she said you were going to take me to court and use my issue against me." A sob escaped her small frame. I frowned and pulled her to me.
"I'm so sorry!" She cried into my chest.
"There's nothing to apologize for. You were depressed, it's okay to say it out loud." I kissed her head and rocked her gently. "You got pregnant by a married asshole, you didn't exactly win the baby daddy lottery."
She chuckled into my chest. I felt myself relax with the sound.
"I think I did." She whispered. "You're the reason I kept her."
I pulled us onto the couch, making her straddle me. I searched her face for something. I had no idea what I was looking for, just anything. I guess my confusion was easy to read because she continued.
"At first, when Eva told me she couldn't take her, I panicked. I was actually on my way to drop her off at your place but, I heard you and Ruger talking and ran." I grimaced at the conversation.
It was when he first learned about Chase. Eva lied about sleeping with her clients and wasn't sure if the kid was his. I said some pretty intense things.
At least you'll have kids with someone you love.
You'll never have to worry about explaining to your wife that you have a kid and have no idea what kind of mother she has.
And you damn sure don't have to stay if the kid isn't yours.
"I wanted to prove to you that I could be a good mother. Not just you, everyone. People think that foster kids don't know how to love anyone. I thought keeping her would prove everyone wrong but, it didn't. I proved them right. The one time I get the opportunity to love someone and I spiral into a deep depression." She sobbed against my shoulder, her heavy tears soaked to my chest.
"I'm a terrible mother. I've been isolating her for so long that she thinks just having mom is normal." I rubbed her back, letting her get everything out. "Do you know how embarrassing it is to admit that you have no family besides your child? To have your friends' parents pity you so much that they offer their titles to your kid just so she won't be alone on Grandparents Day or Father's Day or Family Day? Chase has tons of family, hell, he even has you. If Eva is so evil, why does she have everything?"
I sighed out as I listened to her. When she first came clean about everything, I gave Ruger hell for not saying anything. He simply reminded me that I was in no position to do anything and that he had taken care of her. She made me promise not to judge her and I didn't. I couldn't. Cree went through his own depression when sorellina left, so Ruger and I both knew what it was like.
Even though she ran off with my daughter, I couldn't fault her. It was all my fault that Lucia didn't have a proper family. It was my fault that Harper felt so hopeless, embarrassed because she couldn't be everything her daughter needed.
She'll never feel that again if I can help it.
"We love Chase, that's why. He's Ruger's family, just like you're my family. And you nor Lucia will ever have to go through that again. Just tell me what triggered this and we can start from there." I whispered softly.
She leaned back and wiped her face with both hands before sliding off of my lap. The cold air shocking me out of my slight trance. I stared at her as she handed me the purple folder.
The Book of Lucia
Our beautiful little creation was smiling from ear to ear with her curly hair pulled up into two pigtails with purple ribbons tied around them. She was wearing the galaxy tie dye shirt we made in the backyard.
Harper's thoughtfulness touched me because it was one of the photos I took. Lucia had just called me "daddy" and wanted to cheer me up once she saw the tears in my eyes. The poor girl thought she did something wrong.
She did everything right.
I opened the folder and flipped through the pages. They were filled with random facts and pictures. I smiled at the picture of the three of us under her favorite things. The last page explained all of Harper's tears. It was a family tree.
It tugged at my heart to know our daughter didn't know anyone. She wasn't at fault; it was mostly mine. Harper never really had anyone. She couldn't help her situation. I, on the other hand, had an abundance of family yet only two members were aware of my daughter. All because I wanted to preserve my image.
Looking at a sniffling Harper, I knew I needed to do something and I knew just who to call. I immediately dialed the number I knew by heart and waited. As expected, they picked up on the second ring.
"Sto tornando a casa. I have someone I want you all to meet."
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Should Lucien take all the blame?
What do you think is going on with Eva?
Do you think Harper is really getting better?
Should Harper and Lucien keep having casual sex? Is it more?
Would moving in with Lucien be a mistake?
Harper?
Lucien?
Lucia?