Friday morning saw perhaps the country's most indecisive weather. When I first pulled open my curtains, there was pouring rain. By the time I'd left my house to run for the bus, it had turned to a hailstorm. And when Alex got on three stops later, the sun came out like the star of the show.
Then again, maybe the weather was just a prediction of what was to come. Because on the final day of dare week, and with the challenge Alex and I had chosen to complete, there was really no telling how this Friday would go.
I dare you to carry each other around for an entire day.
Whoever had submitted the dare was, really, some kind of evil mastermind. On the surface, it seemed perfectly innocent. Piggy backs for a day sounded like a fun game, especially when the donation tagged along with it was pretty substantial. Alex and I had seized the slip of paper the previous day with matching enthusiasm. However, it was only once we'd hopped off the bus, and a game of rock-paper-scissors had ended with Alex hopping on my back, that we started to wonder exactly what we'd let ourselves in for.
"Faster!"
The demand came with a kick in my leg: an unfortunate collision of the toe of Alex's trainers and my upper thigh. Still, this was definitely easier said than done. My best friend didn't look like the kind of guy who spent six days a week at the gym, but with his weight dragging on my back, he might as well have been. We'd barely made it halfway up the hill to the school gates before I was struggling for breath.
Whose idea was it to put the school on a hill, anyway? Surely somebody must've considered what a terrible plan it was. Not only were we the only school to remain open when every other kids in the area got days off for flooding, nobody had taken into account how difficult it would be to piggy-back someone up to the gates.
"I'm going as fast as I can," I told him, though it came out much more fragmented when broken up by frantic gasps for breath. "Be patient."
"I am being patient," he said, "but we've been going at this for ten minutes now, and we're not even close."
"You want to switch places?" I snapped back. "Because, really, feel free."
"That's not how it works. You lost rock-paper-scissors."
"Rock-paper-scissors is a game of luck," I grunted. "And, trust me, you're the one that got real lucky here."
"Not feeling so lucky," his voice came back. "This is really uncomfortable."
It was then, under the pressure of my aching back, that I snapped. Before Alex had time to realise what I was doing, I came out of my hunched over position, standing up straight with such urgency that he lost grip and went sliding right off.
And, thanks to the morning's unpredictable weather, right into a pile of trampled mud.
His protest was instant, but all I could concentrate on was how much better my back felt. I turned around just in time to catch sight of him, flat on his backside, with an attractive brown stain now creeping down the back of his shirt. And I couldn't contain my laughter.
"What was that for?" he said, gathering to his feet and trying to twist his body to inspect the damage.
"Just wanted you to feel a little more comfortable," I said, with a sweet smile. "Certainly better for me."
"You are so going to pay for that," he warned. "Now let me get back on."
I shook my head. "I don't think so. It's my turn."
"Says who?"
"Says me," I said, moving to stand behind him and tapping two hands on his shoulders. "Fair's fair. And maybe this way you'll be a little more comfortable."
He groaned, but crouched to let me jump on all the same, and I couldn't help feeling a slight sense of victory as the two of us trekked the remaining way up the hill.
***
As it turned out, this sense of victory only grew stronger once we made it to the sixth form common room. We burst through the doors to an unexpected commotion – and as Alex carried me inside, I realised that all the noise was for us. The attention of the entire sixth form was upon us, setting up an unexpected spotlight. People were looking on with admiration, cheering, and clapping me on the back as we passed.
We headed for our usual table in the corner, but there was something different this time. The dare box sat in the centre of it, but as I slid off Alex's back and reached to grab it, the new-found weight was instantly noticeable. There was no doubt this was no longer a box stuffed with scraps of paper.
And when I pulled it open, I couldn't hold back the smile that crept onto my face.
Our classmates really had delivered. And to an extent neither of us could've predicted. A bed of notes lined the bottom of the box, and the change piled on top was even more substantial. Each completed dare had been replaced with its respective sponsor, and the collective result was overwhelming.
I felt a hand on my shoulder, and turned to see one of our classmates – Amy – surrounded by a whole load of others. "Hey," she said. "We just wanted to congratulate you guys on completing the week. I know we've kind of put you through hell, so you definitely deserve all this." She gestured toward the box in my arms.
"You really have put us through hell." Faking seriousness lasted no longer than a couple of seconds before I broke out into a smile. "But it's been worth it. Especially as all this money will go to a great cause."
"Well," she said, "you guys are braver than us."
I turned to Alex, who was looking between the box and the room with all the same surprise and wonder that I felt. He looked up, and our eyes caught, exchanging a silent glance between us.
"You know," he said, "even though it's been torture and everything, in a weird way, I've kind of enjoyed this."
"Yeah." I smiled back. "I know what you mean."
"So..." His voice trailed off, and a mischievous glint that suddenly appeared in his eye made me a little nervous about what was to come. "You're up for doing the whole thing again next year?"
I couldn't resist shoving him playfully in the side, and the sound of our laughs mixed together against background noise of the common room. "No way," I said. "I'll say I enjoyed it, but there's no way I'm putting myself through this again."
"Again?" He quirked an eyebrow. "You're talking like it's already over, Mia. Saddle up, because I've got my first class in ten minutes, and if all this money's to go to charity then my feet can't touch the floor."
I rolled my eyes, but at that moment the bell rung, and I realised Alex's little joke was in fact still my reality.
There were only six more hours of the school day to get through.
***
The following Saturday, I was spending my evening like most others – sprawled out on the sofa, shovelling popcorn into my mouth, engrossed in an intense Netflix marathon – when my phone rang.
I swallowed the mouthful of popcorn as I caught sight of the caller ID, and answered. "Alex?"
"Mia," he said, "you are in big trouble."
I reached for the remote balanced on the arm of the chair, turning the volume down so I could hear him more clearly. "Why's that?" I asked, before remembering the time. "Aren't you supposed to be on your date with Hayley?"
"I was on my date with Hayley, up until about ten minutes ago. I'm on the way home."
"Oh, okay," I said, keeping my tone casual. "How'd it go?"
"It went great, actually. We had a lot of fun, and it wasn't awkward at all." There was a small pause, and sensing there was more to come, I stayed quiet. "It's just... I can't help wondering what exactly you told her in the process of getting me this date."
I found myself suddenly thankful it was only a phone call – it was getting difficult to keep the smirk off my face. "I don't know what you're talking about."
"Really, Mia? You don't recall telling her anything... out of the ordinary? Embarrassing, maybe?"
I pretended to think. "Not that I can recall. Why do you ask?"
"It's just weird," he mused, "how she seemed so totally convinced that we'd gone through with the tattoo dare, and that I – for some strange reason – had her name tattooed on my butt."
At this point, I was biting back the laughter. "That is weird," I agreed. "I wonder why she thought that?"
"I wondered too," he said. "Right up until the point she mentioned your name."
I couldn't hold it in any longer – the bubble of laughter escaped me in one burst. "I'm sorry," I wheezed. "I couldn't resist. She was really interested in all the dares we'd managed to do, and she'd already agreed to go out with you, and I couldn't resist having a little fun with it."
I could imagine him shaking his head at me, even though I couldn't see it. "You're evil."
"Not evil," I corrected. "Just your hilarious best friend."
"Hmm. Not sure hilarious is the word I'd use."
"Hey, she knows the truth now, right?" I said, adjusting my position on the sofa and reaching for another handful of popcorn. "No harm done. No long-lasting damage."
"Oh, yeah," he agreed, and I couldn't help notice the strange note of mischief that had leaked into his own voice. A note that dried up my own laughter with remarkable efficiency, and stopped me chewing on the popcorn altogether. "Don't worry, I set her straight. She certainly knows the truth now."
I paused. "Wait, why do you sound like that? What did you do?"
"Nothing," he said, in a way that clearly meant something other than nothing.
"Alex."
"Mia."
"No, come on. What did you tell her?"
"Not a lot," he said, in an almost sing-song tone. "Just that it was part of a bet, and you were so ashamed of losing that you didn't want anyone to know you had my name on your butt."
My mouth dropped open, rendering me incapable of answering for a few seconds – though even if I had, Alex probably wouldn't have heard it over his own laughter. Then I came to my senses. "You didn't," I said, in a low tone, almost daring him to keep the joke going.
I could almost hear him grinning. "Oh, I did."
"And she believed you?!"
"She was completely convinced," he said. "I guess it's believable. Maybe even sounds like the kind of thing you'd do."
"You've got to be joking."
"You wish, Mia." I heard a noise in the background, what sounded like the beeping of a car horn. "Anyway, I've got to go – just thought I should give you the heads up in case you're the talk of sixth form on Monday. Love ya."
"Wait, Alex—"
But I couldn't get the words out before there was a beep on the other line, telling me he'd disconnected. I pulled the phone away from my ear and stared at it for a moment, like this might confirm what I'd just heard. Part of me couldn't believe Alex had the nerve – but thinking on it, maybe I deserved it. I had spent the entire week roping him into public humiliation in the name of charity, and my natural mischief hadn't exactly made things easy for him.
So the entire sixth form was going to think I'd got my best friend's name on my lesser-seen cheeks. Maybe it wasn't the worst thing in the world. Maybe I just had to own it.
It was just karma, coming back to bite me on my imaginarily inked butt.
***
If you've been inspired by Mia and Alex's fundraising efforts, head to www.rednoseday.com to see how you could make your laugh matter this Red Nose Day.