I grab the pencil once again and bite a little on it, something that I've always done when I'm really trying to focus. It's hard when so much has happened, I have a lot on my mind. Well, the homework won't finish itself so I don't have an option really.
The silence in my room is almost mysterical when suddenly, someone knocks on my door. In belief that it's Shane I don't say anything since I know that he'll just walk straight in anyway, but when the person walks in I can see that it's Cora.
"Hey"
"Hey"
"What happened in school today? With Shane? I heard dad talking about the police and stuff"
"Well, me and Trevor were practising and he just kept acting all weird. So eventually I decided to confront him about it and he just kissed me" I start and Cora gasps a little. I nod and continue. "So I got mad at him and went out where Shane was standing with some other guys. He made me tell him and he pushed Trevor against the wall and almost punched a hole in it"
"And here I was thinking that he was done with all that..." she sighs sadly and I can't help but feel guilty. If I wouldn't have been in there with Trevor it wouldn't have happened.
"I'm sorry, I wasn't prepared for him kissing me and I immediately pushed him away-"
"No, don't feel bad. It's not your fault that Shane did what he did. He made that choice himself. Nobody's blaming you for it"
"But I could've noticed that he was going to kiss me, I could've stopped it" I frantically tell her, and she smiles a little before sitting down next to me in the bed.
"Kayla, he caught you off guard. You couldn't have done anything differently, so stop blaming yourself for it" she says with a calm but sad voice and I sigh.
"Thanks Cora"
"No problem" she says when the door suddenly flies open. Shane walks in without a shirt on and his black, ripped jeans that he almost always wears. When he sees Cora he stops but without changing his neutral face expression.
"Cora, get out"
Cora turns to me with a 'will you be okay?'-look and I nod. She walks out of the room and Shane goes to shut the door. He hasn't even looked at me yet, but stays beside the door resting against the wall with crossed arms when it slowly closes.
"How are you?" I finally ask him after a few minutes of silence. Shane's looking down at the floor with a completely emotionless face.
"I'm fine" he hisses and walks past me to my big window. He once again crosses his arms and watches as the traffic rolls by outside.
"So... Why did you come here?" I ask, trying to sound as calm as possible to not have him shouting at me or something.
"I... Don't know"
I lift the corner of my mouth and walk closer to him with slow steps. Should I really bring it up? I really want to know, so I decide to do it.
"I have to ask. How will things be between you and Trevor now?"
He sighs and puts his hands on his hips, now looking down at the floor.
"I really don't know... We've been best friends for a very long time now, and I know that he's kind of a player who likes to charm girls but I never thought that he would go after, uh, you" he says and scratches his neck. I wrinkle my eyebrows.
"Why? Am I not good enough for him or what are you saying?" I ask with a hint of annoyance in my voice. Shane turns around with a 'really?'-look on his face.
"That's not what I'm saying"
"Okay, so what were you saying then?" I ask suspiciously, which causes him to take a few steps forward until he's dangerously close to me.
"I made it crystal clear for him that you're not gonna be on his list. He accepted that, or at least that's what I thought"
"W-what?" is all I can get out of my mouth. Why would he say something like that? It's not like I would rather be with Trevor but I certainly don't appreciate him making decisions for me about stuff like this.
"Yes? You're mine" he exclaims as if it's the most obvious thing in the world. My heart starts racing just by the thought of him considering me as his but I can't let him know that.
"Oh, I'm yours? What about you and Bridget then?" I ask with a small smirk, placing my hands on my hips cockily. He smiles a little and bites his lip.
"Kay-Kay, are you jealous?"
I snort and shake my head but his eyes suddenly scan my entire body. He walks even closer, something I didn't think was even possible, and places a few fingers on top of my bare shoulder. They travel slowly along the whole shoulder down on the collarbone, sending waves of electricity in my body.
"I'm telling her about us tomorrow. Everybody will wonder what's going on anyway, so I might as well just tell them everything" he says with a now lower voice, indicating that he's much more calm now. He rests his forehead on mine while his breath fans my chest.
"Okay, so... What are we exactly?"
"We're together"
I smile and our lips meet. But this time it's not as aggressive as usual, it's just... Beautiful. Soft. Careful.
Later when I'm sleeping in my bed, someone suddenly shouts waking me up immediately.
"NO!" Shane yells in his sleep. His forehead is shiny by sweat and he's breathing extremely fast. I gently tap him on his arm to wake him up.
"Shane? Are you okay?" I whisper and he flies up from the bed.
"Yeah... I'm fine" he whispers back, trying to catch his breath. I know that he's not but I decide not to push it further. A few moments pass by in silence and just when I think that he's fallen asleep again, I can feel a hand searching for mine. When they've found each other the hand tightens its grip. I can't help but smile a little.