The next day they took him directly to get the bone marrow transplant, and I was told I could go home. But instead, I put on the outfit my mom brought, a light pink sweater, with my pastel tribal print leggings, boots and put my hair into a messy bun, did my makeup and left the hospital. And went to the hospital where brayden was. I ran into the hospital, and found his mom.
I hadn't exactly met his mom, but I had seen pictures on facebook, and she and I had messaged each other a few times. She was really nice, and came over and hugged me as soon as she saw me come in.
"Sweetie, you shouldn't be here! You just got out of the hospital yourself, you need to be at home resting!"
"No, I need to be here when we are able to see him, I missed him so much. I need to know hes okay."
She nodded and just stood there looking at me for a while, before taking my hand and leading me to sit in the waiting area with her and some other family members.
In a little bit, the other relatives went on a food run, and left her and I alone in the waiting area. She kept looking at me, as if she wanted to say something to me, but she didn't seem ready. So I just waited for her to say what she wanted to.
"So...how are you?"
"I'm...okay, I've honestly been better."
"of course, you've just gotten out of the hospital, and in your condition, I can't expect any more than just okay." She smiled at me, "I'm going to go get some coffee, do you want anything?"
I shook my head no and she left. I sat there thinking, did she know? There's no way. How could she possibly know? Eventually I just let the idea slip out of my mind, I needed to be focusing on Brayden right now, not me.
His mom came back, just as the doctor came out to get her. He said the procedure went extremely well, and we could go see brayden now. When we walked into the room, he was just waking up, and I could tell by his expression that he was in some pretty intense pain. I walked over to the side of his bed and held his hand, squeezing tightly. HE gently pulled me over, and kissed my forehead.
"I heard you were in the hospital, how's my baby?"
My heart started to race, and time slowed down slightly. I thought he wasn't supposed to know, they said no stressors. I must have had a confused look on my face because he laughed and said, "I was talking about you babe."
I smiled and shook my head, "of course you were." I laughed. He smiled up at me and looked over at his mom who was entering the room, after talking with the doctor.
"How much pain are you in sweetie? Scale of 1-10?"
He held up seven fingers, but the look on his face said full on ten.
"I'll go tell the doctor, and we'll get you some pain medication, okay?" He nodded and she left the room. Returning only minutes later with a nurse holding a syringe. She walked over, injected the fluid into his IV and left.
Brayden's mom looked at her watch. "Oh crap. Honey, I have a meeting at work that I can't miss, im so sorry. Do you need me? I don't want to leave you alone! I can cancel if you don't want me to leave!"
Brayden laughed and said, "Go mom, I'm fine. Promise, I'll see you tomorrow?"
She kissed his cheek, nodded and left hurriedly, so we wouldn't see her crying.
"You know, no one will be in here for the rest of the night" He said, pulling on my hand.
"Brayden!" I said, as my face turned a whole new shade of scarlett.
"No, babe, just come lay with me." He laughed, "Please?" He pulled on my hand some more and I climbed into the hospital bed next to him, laying my head on his chest, and intertwining my fingers with his. He shuttered, and I looked up, "Does it still hurt? Do you need me to get a nurse?" "No baby, just lay here." He said, I sat up and grabbed the blankets and pulled them over us, snuggling back into him, making sure to steer clear of any of his wires and monitors.
I thought about the baby, and my heart started to beat faster, this didn't feel right. I felt like i was lying to him, but i couldn't tell him until he was a little stronger. I felt him playing with my hair and i started dozing off, although i tried to stop myself so that i could stay awake if he needed something before he fell asleep. But when i looked up at him, he was already asleep from all of the meds, and before i knew it i was asleep also.
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I spent the next few days attending to Brayden nonstop. My mom called me multiple times a day, telling me to eat and stay healthy so i wouldn't be hospitalized, but i usually just ignored her. Brayden needed me, and he was more important than anything. I made sure that he was eating, and that he wasn't in pain. I wanted him to be well enough to go home, i hated seeing him like this. The doctors said he was getting stronger everyday, and that the transplant had seemed to work.
The third day i had been at the hospital with him, i woke up feeling woozy. I ate some toast, and got right to helping brayden and the nurses with anything i could. As the day went on, i felt worse. Around one oclock his mom showed up to help also, and i decided to sit down and breathe for a minute.
His mom came over, "Honey, are you okay?"
"Yeah I think so, I'm just going to get some fresh air." I stood up to walk out and as i passed the end of Braydens bed, i blacked out, and felt myself falling.
"Oh my god! Brayden call the nurses! Now! Oh my god, honey, can you hear me, Allie!"
"Mom, calm down, i'm sure she's okay! She just needs to eat or drink something! What's the big deal?!"
"The baby Brayden! Something could be wrong, please get a nurse, Now!"
I heard everything, for some reason everything was black, but i heard the gasp from brayden, the push of a button, and then a nurse running in.
What the hell is happening...
These were days 73-76