Three months later
I grabbed Luke's hand and led him into the house behind me. "Hey Cole," I greeted as we entered the front door.
"Hey," he said and eyed Luke and then looked at me. It's a little awkward because I've been hanging out with Luke a lot and we do all of the things couples do but we haven't made anything official. However I sleep with Cole off and on sometimes. Of course Luke doesn't know that and obviously if we made things official I would cut all sexual ties with Cole.
"Hey my sweet boys," I said to my babies as I walked over to the play mat in the middle of the living room. Jax can sit up by himself and Josiah rolls everywhere now. In fact Josiah rolled off of the mat. I picked him up and gave him a kiss. "Say hi Luke," I picked up his hand and waved to Luke and Siah smiled at him when he made a funny face.
"My mom is coming over soon to see the boys," Cole told me and I sighed, immediately feeling like my day is ruined. She went into this phase where she gives me advice on how to raise the boys and I appreciated it at first but now all she ever says is "well I did it this way". I'm not even married and I feel like I have in-laws.
I walked into the kitchen with Josiah on my hip and made bottles for the both of the boys. I stopped breastfeeding recently because Jaxon cut his first two teeth and now Cole and I are doing better on money since we both have jobs so we can afford formula.
I took the boys in my room and Luke followed me. I fed the boys and had a conversation with Luke.
"You are a great mom," he complimented me and I smiled at him.
"I don't know about that but I try my best," I smoothed Jax's dark hair and cradled Josiah.
"I can tell," he leaned over and kissed my cheek making me smile. He is the sweetest guy I've ever met. I noticed a pair of Cole's boxers on my bedroom floor and I kissed Luke to distract him from looking over there. After he pulled away, lucky for me(not), he looked. He didn't say anything and pretended like he didn't see them. He looked into my eyes and he knew I saw them too. After a minute he asked me something concerning them.
"Do you and Cole still have a thing?" He asked like it pained him.
"No. There was never a thing, I told you when I got pregnant we weren't even a thing," I answered and laid the boys next to each other so they could play. They love seeing each other.
"Then whose are those?" He asked and gestured to the boxers laying near my dresser.
"Remember we promised to be truthful to each other, remember that when I tell you this," I paused scared to tell him the truth but he deserves it. "I've been sl- Cole and I are not a thing, I'm not interested in him, I want you," I assured him nervously. I've never seen Luke upset so I'm scared to say something that might throw off his usually cool demeanor. "We have slept together a few more times since I got pregnant, recently actually. But we are just friends because we have to be because we have children together," I explained and rubbed Jaxon's belly to make him laugh.
"So the whole time we've been kissing and touchy towards each other you've been sleeping with Cole?" He asked for clarification. I nodded and he shook his head. "I don't know how I feel about that. Is that why you haven't been ready to make anything official?" He questioned and waited for an answer.
"No, not at all," I replied truthfully. I am afraid to be in a serious relationship because I've never had one before.
"I really like you Jessalynn, a lot. My brother tells me to shut up because I talk about you so much. You are an amazing woman and mother and you're gorgeous," he ranted on about me and I leaned forward, putting my hands around his neck. I pressed my lips to his and then I kissed all over his face to make him laugh.
"You are the sweetest man I've ever met. I really like you too," I kissed him again, long and hard. Cole walked in and looked at us. Luke glared at him and Cole just ignored him.
"My mom's here," he said and I stood up, gathering the boys. I handed them off to Cole and told him I'd be out in a minute.
He walked out of the room with the boys and I kissed Luke again. "You better go," I said and walked him to the door sending him on his way.
"Hi Carly," I greeted and looked at her holding her grandson. I always look at my babies and tell myself good job because I made those perfect little human beings.
"Oh hi Jessa," she smiled and took Jaxon's pacifier away. "Cole was broke from his pacifier at five months old," she compared my baby to hers again and I wanted to scream. I grabbed the binky from her hand and gave it back to Jax.
"He's allowed to have it for a year. It reduces the risk of SIDS," I said and walked into the kitchen. My mom pulled in the driveway too and I walked to the front door standing in the doorway. I wasn't expecting her.
"Hey Jess, I was just bringing over this lasagna for you," she said and hugged me. "And of course I wanted to see my little grandbabies. She looked me up and down and made a weird face.
"What?" I asked her and she shook her head dismissing the topic so I did too. She came inside and set the lasagna down and said hi to everyone. She stayed for awhile and after about an hour, she pulled me to the side.
"Are you with Cole?" She asked and I shook my head.
"No. I told you I'm interested in Luke," I reminded her.
"Are you sleeping with Luke?" She interrogated me and I shook my head again. "Well then who are you sleeping with?" She questioned.
"Mom why are you asking me this?" I asked frankly and she leaned closer.
"Jessa, I think you're pregnant," she said and I felt a sick feeling in my stomach at her conclusion.
"I can't be. Mama I can't be pregnant again," I shook my head in disbelief and looked at my boys. I was just pregnant six months ago.
"I am not saying it's for sure but I would bet money. Jess how could you be so careless again. Do you think Cole is going to stick around and help raise another man's baby too?" She started scolding me and I shook my head in disbelief. I know I'm not pregnant.
"If I'm pregnant, it's Cole's," I told her and tried not to cry. I don't want another baby, I know I said that about the boys and now I wouldn't trade them for the world but I can't juggle three babies. I cannot.
"What?" She asked in disbelief and then shook her head at me, walking back out into the living room. I'm not pregnant. My boobs hurt and are bigger but that's just because my period is supposed to start any day now.
I haven't thrown up or anything like I did with my first pregnancy so I just know. There is no way I could be pregnant, no way. We used a condom every time and Cole is going to freak out because Whitney is pregnant with his baby and he's had a lot on his plate. He's trying really hard to be a good dad to the boys but adding another baby into the mix will upset that. Cole and I do not need to have three kids together.
The rest of the night I couldn't relax and I didn't get any sleep that night. I don't think I'm pregnant but my mom is always right and she has had a lot of kids to know.
"Morning," Cole said as he poured a cup of coffee. "Want one?" He said, holding up the mug.
"Y-no I'm good," I said, thinking about the potential baby inside of me. "Actually yes," I corrected realizing that I'm not pregnant, it's just my moms suspicion.
"By the way I asked you to please clean your stuff out of my room. Luke saw it and I had to explain and I know he was upset," I said while taking my mug from his hand and sipping on it.
"He's just jealous because he can't get in your pants," he picked up the formula scoop and added formula to his coffee and then turned to look at me to see my reaction to his words and then he added formula to the bottles.
"What are you doing?" I asked in confusion.
"Making bottles," he said like I was stupid for not knowing.
"You just put formula in your coffee," I laughed at him. He looked at his cup seeing the powder floating on the top.
"Fuck," he cussed and dumped it in the sink. I laughed some more and walked into the living room and sat on the ground next to the boys who are in their little seats that help them sit up and keep them in place.
"Hi mama's boys," I gave them both kisses on their foreheads and they squirmed their arms and legs happily. Josiah started babbling and Jax sat there mesmerized by his brother.
"I have to go to an appointment with Whitney today and then to work so I won't be seeing you until tonight," Cole told me and I sighed. They found out at her last appointment that she is expecting a boy. Sure I'm a little jealous for my sons but I know that Cole is trying his best. At one point he said he didn't even want to see the child and that he'd rather just pay child support but I sat him down and explained to him that wouldn't be fair to the baby.
"Looks like it's just me and you two today," I told the boys and stood up to go use the bathroom. Maybe I should buy a pregnancy test just to be sure. But I don't want to waste money on my mom's superstition.
"Cole, do my boobs look bigger to you?" I asked him in desperation.
"Yeah I noticed they got bigger again," he said as he bit into a bagel and stared at my chest. Great. "Why?" He asked.
"Just wondering," I opened the fridge and then shut it because I saw nothing that looked good.
"If that was my cue to step into the bedroom, I'm in," he said and I shook my head no.
"Maybe tonight. I'm not feeling good right now," I told him and placed my hand on my stomach. I immediately put my hand to my side and mentally scolded myself. Don't do that, you're not pregnant Jessa.
"I'm going to hold you to that," he said and left the kitchen. Oh goodie.
I ended up taking the boys over to my parents because Emmy has a kiddie pool and I wanted to have the boys play in it. They love water and visiting with my family.
"Be careful with him Hattie. Pais will you watch her with Josiah?" I yelled as I watched Hattie. All of the kids love playing with their nephews but it scares me sometimes with how rough they are.
I walked into the house with my mom to help her carry the food out on the lawn because we are eating dinner outside tonight. "Oh don't strain yourself," my mom said purposefully as she stopped me from picking up a tray and patted my belly.
"Mom seriously? I'm not pregnant," I shook my head irritatedly.
"I think you should take a test and pray to god it doesn't come out positive. I really thought you'd have learned something from those two little boys out there but I guess you needed more of a lesson. I'm really not happy with the puzzle I'm putting together Jessalynn. You're doing things with Cole while seeing Luke? What are you going to do if you are pregnant? You ask yourself that. You'll probably have to quit your job, it might drive Cole to leave because he is overwhelmed and Luke is not going to stick around and watch you give birth to another man's child. Things were finally getting good for you but not if this is true," she lectured me thoroughly while I tossed the salad.
I slammed the wooden salad bowl on the counter and walked out of the kitchen. I went to my old bedroom and laid on the bed they put in so that they would have a spare room if I needed it. She doesn't even know if I'm pregnant again and she's yelling at me. I'm not taking a test. I simply don't want too.
I came back down stairs fifteen minutes later and put the boys in clean clothes while everyone ate dinner outside. As much as I was looking forward to joining them, I have no appetite now.
I went home after dinner and put the boys to bed. Cole still wouldn't get home for another hour but I had no intentions of waiting up.
You guys were all asking for an update so here is one.
Do you guys think Jess is pregnant or is this just a false alarm?
Was this chapter what you expected or not?
By the way I am going to do an awful lot of time hopping now that the main portion of the story is coming to an end and we travel to the next chapter of their lives and what it is like for them down the road.
😘Don't forget to vote and comment for support! 😘